This Night Chapter One - You Never Said Goodbye, a vampire diaries fanfic

Chapter One – You Never Said Goodbye

~ Three months later ~

Elena POV

My alarm startled me out of my sleep. Had been a while since that happened. I usually had nightmares that some sort of horrible death awaited me, it actually happening because the crucial factor of it not happening was always missing. Someone who wanted to keep me alive at all costs. Damon.

It's sort of funny, since I don't really miss him. Or so I tell myself. I just miss the factor he was. The one that could find something to make fun of something even in the darkest of situations.

I've never gotten the chance to say goodbye to him, and that's the only thing I think I regret. Tot getting to say goodbye. 'Cause now I'll have to say goodbye to someone who already left.

I realized recently that there probably is someone who'd let him know if I really were in big trouble. I know that as unbearable as it must've gotten for him, he wouldn't have been able to leave without some sort of reassurance that he'd know if I'd need him. I hoped he did, because I'm betting on it to get a chance to properly say goodbye.

In a few nights, the last event of Mystic Falls High I'm ever going to attend to is taking place. Organised by Caroline and me. It's going to be a sort of karaoke night, yet the people who are going to sing and what they are going to sing are already chosen. The school's own talent. I'm going to be singing just before it is impossible for anyone else to get in, Then some girl I barely know called Alice is up, then Caroline. The there's a whole range of other people. Care and I are going to make sure everything will go okay.

I'll be singing Listen to your heart. I heard it and realised that's how I felt. It's going to be the non-techno version, since that's a better choice, since the evening is about singing something. I'm also going to make sure that if Damon has someone giving him info, he'll hear of this. I'm just hoping he'll listen and come back, even if that's to just say goodbye.

Caroline is going to sing Rumour has it. But unlike me, she doesn't have a special reason to do so. She just wants to, and that's fine by me.

I'm practice for the song a lot, though there's not much to still prepare. I know every line. Every moment of pause, every moment to take a breath. Every movement in voice. Thus today I'm just going to help with getting all the decorations prepared, there's just too much to do. There's also setting up the sound system, the lights system. Installing everything. Deciding on the best sound and lights. So that's what I do, all day long. The next three days.

~~This Night~~This Night~~This Night~~This Night~~ This Night~~This Night~~

It's unbelievable what we've accomplished in so little time. The place looks amazing, and in 24 hours, people will be getting in. I can't wait to see it happen, but I'll have to. I get good night's sleep, and the next day go shopping with Caroline for what to wear.

I decide on a dark-purple dress, that's pretty simple in design, but will make me look the most stunning ever. Caroline picks an orange one. The one I knew she'd pick the moment we walked in.

We go to the school right after, taking the dresses and our makeup with us. The first of those who are going to be singing are arriving, since we asked them to be present at least an hour early. We explain to everyone who's there how everything will work. We redirect them to where they can change and do their make-up, and go to the classroom that leads to the stage, and we dress there. We do each other's make-up, being finished quickly because we did that so often.

The beginning of the evening is a bit like a blur. People from school coming and going backstage, making sure everyone is ready on time, and getting them on stage. Two people are still left before me, and only now I'm starting to get nervous. I practised so many times, even a few times after we had set everything up, and I still feel nervous. There's no reason to feel nervous, but I still do. Once I'm up, which is way too fast for my liking, I almost want to back down, but Caroline pushes me the first steps towards the stage, and then I'm on my own.

The lights blind me, but I know I'm perfectly visible for the audience. Somehow all my nervousness falls off me, when I remember why I'm doing this.

"First I want to say that when I heard this song, I could relate to it so easily. Some parts would be what I'd sing to myself as a friend, some parts what I'd sing if he was still here. But he left, three months ago, and I didn't get to say goodbye. Yet I know, or hope actually, that somehow he made sure he'd still know how I'm doing, because I'm betting on that saying all of this. If you get this message, Damon, please come back, so I can at least properly say goodbye."

Then the music started to play, and all I could hope was that someone, somewhere in the crowd, would pass the message.

I know there's something in the wake of your smile.
I get a notion from the look in your eyes.
You've built a love, but that love falls apart.
A little piece of heaven, turns too dark.

Listen to your heart, when he's calling for you.
Listen to your heart, there's nothing else you can do.
I don't know where you're going, and I don't know why.
But listen to your heart, before you tell him goodbye.

Sometimes you wonder if this fight is worthwhile.
The precious moments are all lost in the tide. (yeah)
They're swept away, and nothing is what it seems.
The feeling of belonging, to your dreams.

And there are voices that want to be heard.
So much to mention, but you can't find the words.
The scent of magic, the beauty that's been.
When love was wilder, than the wind.

Listen to your heart, before
you tell him goodbye.

I bowed graciously once I was done, and was awarded with a loud applause. Once it died down enough for my voice to be understandable through the speakers again, I realised I still wanted to say something. "If I was right about someone letting Damon know things, I ask you once more, let him know."

Then I turned around, and walked off the stage, leaving a silenced audience behind. Then the Alice girl was up, and she sang a song I didn't know, it was about a love she hadn't gotten the chance to explore. I had to smile, even if it was just the slightest, at that, because it was so similar to what happened to me.

The audience loudly applauded when she was done, and I had to agree she was one of the better singers of the evening. The Caroline was up, and I loudly applauded together with everyone else once she was done.

Caroline told me to get a little break and go to onto the floor and see what people thought and have some fun. Another girl was on the stage that I didn't know, she sang Fuckin' Perfect.

I was having a lot of fun, everyone told me they totally loved the event and were really enjoying themselves and all those kind of lovely things.

Then, when the girl was done singing, there was a short moment of silence, and then Caroline came up. Everyone was yelling and cheering, not having forgotten her previous song yet. She motioned for everyone to quiet, and they all did almost immediately.

"There will be a slight change of program, the stage lights will go off for a moment, you will be able to enjoy music all the same, when light and music comes back up, I'll promise all of you a great surprise."

Once she had said those words, almost all lights pointed on the stage went out, and I could faintly see her walk off the stage. Then all the lights dimmed, and the first song someone sang started playing. I wanted to go backstage and ask Care what happened, but she was waiting for me there and she told me to trust her and just stay on the floor and try to keep everyone happy with the promise of something awesome.

I didn't really get it, but did as she asked anyway. I talked to some people who had sang songs already, and they told me they totally loved the experience of doing that. One girl, Roxette, someone I've known by name for a while, but no better than that, told me she thought I was so good at singing. I told her she was also great, and she was absolutely flattered be my remark.

Then, at some point, after playing song after song that had been sang, they skipped to mine. Huh, why'd they do that? I was stupid not to realise what would happen before it did. After my song, a song started playing, I didn't know it, but I definitely knew the voice that was singing it. Turning towards the stage, I noticed the lights were still off.

There are things
I have done
There's a place
I have gone
There's a beast
And I let it run
Now it's running . . .
My way

Then the lights went on, and he was actually there. He was looking straight at me, honesty in his eyes, a question for forgiveness. His eyes pleading me to listen to what he was singing.

There are things
I regret
You can't forgive
You can't forget
There's a gift
That you sent
You sent it . . .
My way

So take this night
Wrap it around me like a sheet
I know I'm not forgiven
But I need a place to sleep
So take this night
And lay me down on the street
I know I'm not forgiven
But I hope that I'll be given . . .
Some peace

There's a game
That I played
There are rules
I had to break
There's mistakes
That I made
But I made them . . .
My way

Then, instead of walking back to the backstage section we had created in the school, he jumped down and walked towards me, people quickly stepped aside, and they were also giving me space to move forward. My feet moved on their own, and before I realised it, the distance between our bodies had been closed. We were standing an inch apart, looking at each other disbelievingly.

"What you sang, Elena, I got the message, but… I have to know, what's your heart telling you about saying goodbye, because you only asked for a chance to say goodbye."

"Sometimes, Damon, goodbyes don't work out as goodbyes. That's why you never said goodbye, right? Well my heart's telling me, right here, right now, not to say goodbye."

And that was it, with that, Damon had a huge smile on his face, and suddenly he was hugging me. I had to grin at that, it had always been me who initiated a hug, and he had barely ever hugged back. I slowly wrapped my arms around him, and relaxed my head onto his shoulder. I inhaled and his scent hit me. God, I never realised how good he smelled. Or did I never want to? I slowly untangled myself from him, and he looked at me with a huge grin. He gave me a quick kiss on my forehead.

"Go backstage and talk to Caroline, we'll talk after this whole evening is over. I'll wait for a bit, since our conversation is probably going to be a long one."

"But Damon-"

"No, Elena, no discussion. You're going backstage and talk to Caroline, I'll wait 'till later tonight. Go, she's got things to tell you. Come and see me once you're ready to go, no earlier than that."

It was clear Damon was pushing me on this one and I let him. I went backstage, and Caroline was waiting for me there.

"Have you figured it out yet, Elena?"

"Figured what out?"

Caroline laughed at that. "It was that much of a smart choice huh, what do you think?"

"It was you?!" I exclaimed "Were you the one giving Damon information?!"

"I see that, but why would you, of all people, be willing to do that for Damon?"

"Because I'm not an idiot, and I'd be the best one at convincing him if he'd have to come back to get you or something."

"Alright, fair enough."

"I could imagine that you'd like to go back to him right now and get out of here and talk?"

"How would you know that… and about that."

"Because I know you and he told me he'd say something along those lines."

"Ah, okay. Yeah, it'd be great if I could get out of here already."

"Just check the new schedule I made. So I'm sure I've got everyone, then I'm sure I can manage."

"Okay, where is it?" I asked, sounding a bit too eager for my liking.

"On the table over there." She pointed to the table in the far corner.

"I checked it once, twice, but couldn't find anyone missing on it or double or anything like that."

"Okay thanks Elena. Go on, get Damon go… well wherever you want, do what you want. No one can blame you for anything if you do that, it's being yourself, not even Stefan."

"Thanks Care, but why bring Stefan up? He left a month later, what's the point?"

"That you tried to get this message out to Damon, and not Stefan. Don't let you guilt define you. You are who you are, be proud of that."

"Thanks again, Care. Bye, see you later, let me know how everything went."

"I'll text you tomorrow, you can call me, well whenever, if you have any details to share."

I quickly left the room, pretending not to have heard the last part. I had really listened to Caroline. I would do as I wanted. And right now I wanted to surprise Damon by sneaking up on him, or at least try to. So I did.

I slowly moved to the crowd towards him. I saw him talk and smile to other people, and I ducked every time he turned his head a bit too far in my direction, but I don't think he noticed me. I got myself pretty close to him, I only had a few more metres to go, when I heard him laugh loudly at something someone said. I saw him do his eye-thing at the girl in response, and even though I know he's just being himself, which, of course, I can't blame him for, I feel a little pang of jealousy. I have no idea where it came from, but it told me something I had never accepted. I feel so much more for him than friendship.

It startled me to realise and accept that so easily, but honestly? I didn't really care anymore. I am who I am, no one can blame me for that.

I sneaked up to him as I planned, and slid my arms around him from behind him. At first he didn't notice, which I tried really hard for, but when I knew I wouldn't have a chance anymore, I quickly closed my arms around him.

He stiffened at first, trying to process what was happening I guess. He then took both of my hands and, as he held them, turned around, letting one go over his head. He let the movement continue until it was me in his arms.

"you're a little earlier than anticipated." He says in my ear, whispering would have been unhearable, but I know he would have if it would've been possible.

"So, shouldn't that be all the better?" I asked him, letting my head rest on his shoulder.

"All the better." He says. "And you sneaking up on me like that, you're never ever going to succeed in that again."

"We'll see." I answer, with a tone that said exactly what I'm thinking. Probably not, but it won't be for the lack of trying.

He only slightly chuckles, and starts leading me towards the exit without saying anything. There's no need to. Outside he asks whether I prefer going to his or my place.

"Yours." I say, not having to think about it at all, it's been too long since I've been there.

He nods and takes me to his car. Opens the door for me and closes it. He drives us to the boarding house, and neither of us says a word.

He opens and closes the car door for me again, and does the same with the entrance to the house. Just as I'm about to ask him why he's being so gentlemanly, he puts a finger to my lips.

"Listen Elena, before we exchange any words, I need to know whether I will really want to hear it or not. Whether… it will crush the little hope I have left, or justify the fact that I held on so long."

His eyes as he says this are filled with so many emotions. Hope. Love. Longing. But also fear. Fear of losing me forever, of having wasted another few years over a woman he'll never have. And in that very moment, I realised I'd do anything to make him happy. Anything, because of the love I feel for the man in front of me. The man that protected me at all costs. The man that left because he couldn't bear seeing me with his little brother. The man that came back when I asked him to. He came back even though he knew it would make or break him.

"I love you, Damon." I said, not minding the finger on my lips.

"What?" his voice rang instantly, the finger removed from my lips.

"I love you." I repeated, this time in a whisper.

"I love you too, Elena." He whispered, as he glanced at my lips and slowly started closing the distance between us.

I had one second to decide whether I wanted him to kiss me. A second I did not need, because I knew instantly. He had already closed his eyes when I moved my head forward to meet his lips.

He let out a hum of content as our lips met, and his hands gently touched my cheeks. My hands had already tangled into his hair and were pulling him closer.

His hands remained on my cheeks, but held my face in a strong grasp. As I was starting to need some air, I started to pull back. Harder and harder. Trying to tell him I needed to break the kiss I started talking, even though my words were muffled by the kiss. Starting to feel a bit too lightheaded, I decided to pull at his hair as hard as I could.

It did do the trick. I pulled him off me, and inhaled the much needed air deeply. But once it got into my system, I only felt worse. As if my body was glad it had air now, but had too little anyway, everything blackened around me and I fainted. Nice reunion kiss. I thought sarcastically before slipping away fully.

Damon POV

She suddenly pulled at my hair, and that made me unlock my lips from hers. I had lost track of time because of the addicting kiss, and when she sucked in a deep breath I realised I must've shut off her air supply for too long.

Just as I wanted to apologise, she collapsed in front of me. I caught her swiftly, and cursed myself for wanting her so much. I brought her upstairs and put her in my bed, draping the blankets over her so she wouldn't get cold.

I got a glass of water ready, sat down on one side of the bed and waited for her to come to. It didn't take too long. I noticed her slowly opening her eyes, and the first thing I mumbled was a sorry.

She looked at me with those beautiful eyes of hers, and I just couldn't look away.

"Love me a bit too much, Damon?" She asked, and really, I was just simply happy she felt well enough to crack a joke.

"Yeah, guess I just might. It was probably more of that I never thought we'd kiss like that." I then handed her the glass of water.

She drank it all at once, then handing me the glass back. I put it on the nightstand quickly.

"Thanks." She mumbled, a smile on her face. The kind of smile I hadn't gotten to see before, not directed at me, at least. A loving smile.

I just smiled at her. I couldn't do anything more than that. My thoughts were racing so fast that I couldn't make sense of them. Thus I decided to not pay any attention to them and focus on Elena.

"We kinda did come here to talk." She reminded me, and that got me back on track. A little.

"What is there to talk about?" I asked, cause I really had no idea.

"What we're going to do with the fact I love you?" Elena started. "I want to finish the year here and really? I just feel so tired of studying, drama always having come in the way, that I want some fun time."

"Sounds perfectly fine to me." Was the only thing I could respond.

"So how about you? Don't you have any questions? A lot of things happened once you left."

"Just one. Where's Stefan?"

"No idea, he left about a month after you did."

"And you asked me to come back?"

"Yes."

I took a little while to process that. God, I love her so much.

"Can I kiss you again I promise I'll be more careful this time."

"I thought you'd never ask." She said, sitting up, putting her arms around my neck, and pulling me back down with her. By the time her head hit the pillows again, I was kissing her again. Lips to lips, like downstairs. Then I felt her tongue slowly trailing over my lower lip. I couldn't hold back the low growl that rose in my throat, and I slightly parted my lips to find she had really asked for entrance.

I let my tongue invade her mouth, and judging by the sounds she made, she loved it. I slowly ended the kiss, giving her time to catch her breath, I started trailing kisses down her neck, and back up.

I was very glad I had covered her with my sheets, because if I hadn't, I'd now be fighting myself not to touch her, well more than I have to now, because that dress looks absolutely heavenly on her. Then again, she'd look heavenly in anything. Anything. Runs through my mind, and an image of her wearing my shirt comes up. The idea gets me hard instantly, and I curse myself, again, for wanting her so bad.

She seems to notice that I shift on the bed uncomfortably, and she asks me something that I wasn't expecting.

"How about you take your shoes off and join me?"

The moment she suggests it, I'm taking off my shoes and socks. She, on the other hand, is getting out of the bed, I raise an eyebrow at her, which does earn me an explanation, even though it's brief.

"Dresses aren't comfortable."

She waited till I was in the bed, and then asked me to close my eyes. Of course. It would've been too good to be true to see her like that already. Already. God I can't believe I will. God Elena, I love you.

I felt the blankets shift, and knew she had climbed in. I noticed she was wearing something, apart from her underwear.

"What are you wearing, seeing dresses aren't comfortable?"

"Boyfriend's shirt." Was the response, and that got my mind racing. More than it already was. Boyfriend? God Elena, you got me feeling like a teen girl who wants to squeak of joy.

"Come again?" I asked, having to hear something like that again, judging her response, she knew that.

"Boyfriend."

Then my mind seemed to flip a certain switch, and the next word that came out of my mouth widened my grin, if that was still possible.

"Girlfriend."

"Hmm." Elena made that content sound, and I knew I could call her that.

We were lying on our sides, facing each other. Unable to stop myself, my eyes wandered to her lips again. Not only unable, unwilling would also qualify.

I looked at her eyes again, and noticed they were half closed. Whether with sleep or lust I did not know. I gently placed my hand on her cheek, and she closed her eyes, slightly turning her face into my hand.

She then moved closer and cuddled into my chest. I wrapped my arms around her and that earned me a content hum. I gave her a sweet kiss on top of her head, and with that she fell asleep in my arms. It didn't take long for me to drift off as well.