Love and Pain lie close together

After she hadn't said one word to him anymore for the rest of the day, they had went to bed and fallen asleep in silence. While she was still sleeping, he'd begun to chop wood on the outside after it had finally stopped snowing. Logan still wondered what she'd thought about the day before that had made her act so strangely.

After an hour on the outside, he made a break and took a look around. The sun had finally broken through the clouds and dipped the landscape into a gleaming even expanse. He closed his eyes briefly to pick up every scent, noise and change in nature with his senses. He heard a rustling in some bushes far away and could hear hoe a rabbit tried to escape from a wolf that was chasing him. He could already tell that the smaller animal would win the fight. Suddenly he turned his head and watched how Jean came out of the door, only with a blanket around her shoulders. He watched how she walked over to a wooden bench that stood on the side of the house and began to wipe away the snow from it. Lost in thought she sipped on the coffee he'd made before and took a closer look at her surroundings. Logan laid the axe aside to watch her for a while. Once more he couldn't believe his luck to have her back, to be able to look and talk to her again. But still, he didn't understood the why or how. A smile occurred on his lips when the sunlight played with her hair and features. It made him realize once more how beautiful she was. While he began to pick up the logs, he thought about the next days. The way back to the next village was a long one. Especially if they needed food, meds or anything else. There was no other way than walking to it. It would also be risky to appear in the city, not knowing if they were looking for tem by now.

With as many logs in his arms as he could carry at once, Logan slowly approached her; noticing that she was obviously too absorb in her own world than to realize him. "Mornin'," he said softly to not startle her again as he'd done yesterday. Nevertheless, she jumped a bit. He nodded at the blanket. "Ain't that a bit too cold?"

Breaking eye contact, Jean looked at the cup in her hands. "No… It's okay…," she replied barely audible.

"I don't want ya to become sick," he said and put the logs onto the pile. "Have ya already eaten somethin'" She shook her head. "I'll just get the rest of the wood. Then we'll eat." She watched how he went to the logs through the thick snow, before she looked around again. Everything around the cabin consisted of snow, trees and mountains. The small lake close by was frozen, too, due to the coldness and she wondered if that part of Canada had ever seen the green of flowers or grass. She startled again a bit when he dropped more logs next to her. While her green eyes looked at him from aside, she noticed for the first time that despite his rough outer appearance, he suddenly looked more relaxed and at peace than ever before. Still, she couldn't forget about what she'd remembered only hours ago. "Daydreamin' again?" she heard him saying with a smirk on his lips and noticed blushing that she'd been staring at him the whole time through. "Come back inside. It's too cold with a blanket only." He held the door open for her and waited for her to walk past him. Logan closed the door and touched her shoulder briefly. "Are ya alright?"

"Yeah," Jean nodded while she looked down, but he touched her chin to make her look up again.

"Somethin's wrong with ya," he said concerned and looked at her closely. "I can tell that somethin's bothering ya, Jean. Come on, what is it?" Pulling the blanket closer, she put the cup on the table, being watched by him. "Look, I've to get down to the next village after breakfast to get some stuff. I need to know that you're fine. That nothin's gonna happen…"

"I'm in control, Logan," Jean said but he shook his head.

"I know that," he replied and put his hands to his hip. "It's just… You're behaving strangely since yesterday. I know the whole situation ain't easy for ya, but…"

"It's not about being here," Jean said calmly and made him frown. "I mean… I still don't know why…why I'm here or how it happened, but…" she went on and felt how tears came up as she remembered how she'd woken up in the garden, not realizing what had happened, when suddenly a lightning bolt had nearly hit her. It still hurt her to know that her best friend hadn't even given her the slightest chance at all to realize everything. It had happened way too fast for her and then even more X-Men and students had come closer with shocked looks on their faces. But also scared ones… She'd been terribly scared while the voice deep within her told her to fight back, but she couldn't. She knew what her powers could do now… And then he'd suddenly been there and had protected her, was ready to attack them just to help her…even after everything she'd done… Not realizing first that she hadn't moved and inch for a while, her head shot up when he touched her cheek gently.

"But what?" Logan asked and his fingers briefly stroked over her skin while his eyes looked into hers softly. "Ya can tell me…" Feeling the same emotions rushing through her body as it had happened before at the Black Bird before she'd sacrificed herself for them, Jean quickly looked down and swallowed hard. It was too easy for him to pick up the changes in her body. Her heart was racing horribly in her chest, telling him that he probably was the reason for her state. So he decided to guess instead. "It's because of me, ain't it?" he asked and saw the surprised look in her eyes. She felt caught. "'Cause I said that I love ya?" Being shocked about how easily he could obviously read her. Not knowing what to say, she only nodded. "I don't expect ya to react to it, Jean," he told her with a shook of his head. "Ya don't have to say anythin' at all. I needed to tell ya 'cause I thought I'd never see ya again. I'm only glad to have ya back." He smiled a bit before he turned around to make something to eat. "Will ya be alright while I'm gone?"

"How long will it take you?" she asked and came closer to help him but he shrugged.

"If it starts snowing again probably 6 to 8 hours," he replied and searched for something to eat. "I'd take ya with me, but they might be looking for us…"

"I'll be fine," Jean assured him and received a smile. "How do I heat the water by the way if I want to take a bath or shower?"

He pointed at a hot-water tank on the opposite wall. "But it takes about an hour or even two before enough water is heated. If ya want to bath you should take care of the water right after you get up." Frowning, she walked over to it. "I already turned it on for you after I took a shower in the morning."

"You showered with cold water?" Jean asked him and raised an eyebrow in disbelief.

Chuckling, he put two plates on the table. "I'm Canadian, Jean. I'd go swimming if the damn lake wasn't frozen." The shudder than ran through her body made him laugh. "What? It's great. Ya should try it yourself."

"No, thanks!" she waved off. "I'll go and shower then, okay?"

"Sure," he nodded and went on cooking.

After they'd eaten breakfast, he'd gotten ready for the long march to the next village. Watching him shouldering his and her backpack, she gave him a slightly scared look. "Be careful, okay?"

He smirked and nodded. "Be careful yourself. Lock the door while I'm gone." She nodded and gave him a brief hug. "I'll be back as soon as I can." Looking at her once more, he turned around and walked away while Jean waited as long at the door as she was able to see him. She couldn't hide that it scared her to know that she was alone while he was gone for a few hours. Her eyes switched to the clock on the wall. It was 9:30 now and if he was right then he wouldn't be back before 7 or 8 p.m. Sighing, she looked around, thinking about what she could probably do in the meanwhile. First, she put new logs into the stove and stared into it for a moment. The TV as he'd told her wouldn't be of any use before he repaired the aerial. It had surprised her at all that he first, had a TV and second, electricity to make it work. She was glad about it, even if she wasn't one to look TV that much. In that way they weren't too isolated from the rest of the world. After beginning to clean the cabin and washing their clothes, she had found a box with some books in it. She'd never thought of him as a person who actually liked to read them. Especially not classic ones like Shakespeare and Hemingway. Before she sat down with a blanket to read, she turned the hot-water tank on to heat water for him. No matter what he'd told her about liking the cold, she knew that he would be half frozen when he returned.

She sat on the sofa and read while she sipped on a tea from time to time, when she heard a loud bang on the outside. Startling, Jean only calmed down after she'd realized that it had been the shutters. Nevertheless, she suddenly frowned and walked over to the window. She'd been too distracted by the book to realize that there was another snow storm raging on the outside. Her head instantly turned towards the clock and her eyes widened. 11:45 p.m. He was already away for over 14 hours… Feeling how a strange feeling emerged within her, she began to pace at the window nervously and imagined the most horrible scenarios possible. Her inner beast was screaming at her to do something, but she didn't know what. On the one hand she didn't know the area as good as he did, on the other the storm was far too strong for her to cope with. Maybe even for him… The more time passed, the more she became scared for him. The only time she left the window was when she needed to use the bathroom.

When she closed the door of the bathroom again, she stopped briefly, just to quickly ran to the front door to unlock it as it knocked again. With her heart beating triple rhythms in her chest, Jean watched how he quickly closed the heavy door again to stop the snow from coming inside. He dropped the two backpacks, plus two additional ones next to it and pulled the soaked hood from his head.

"Sorry, but the village was cut off. I'd to…," Logan began when she threw herself at him sobbing. "Did somethin' happen?" he immediately asked worriedly when she pulled him closer.

"I thought something happened to you…," she cried and heaved a deep sigh in relief. "You said 6 to 8 hours…"

"I was just about to tell ya," he replied. "You clothes are getting soaked, Jean."

Letting go of him, she ran a hand through her face. "What happened?"

"As I said. The village was cut off due to the snow, so I'd to go to the next one. I'm sorry. I made it as quickly as possible," Logan apologized and immediately felt bad about making her worry so much. He watched how she began to pull on his jacket.

"You need to get out of them. You're freezing cold," she said and walked over to the stove. "I heated water for you and make a tea while you shower."

Smiling, he got rid off his wet boots and walked towards the bedroom door. "Thanks, Jeannie," he said softly and noticed the slight blush on her cheeks, but headed to the bathroom.

While she heard the water running in the bathroom, Jean began to unpack the bags and had to smile since he'd also thought about her feminine needs. She put the things away into the kitchen cupboards when he suddenly cleared his throat behind her. Her cheeks became even redder since he only had a towel wrapped around his hips. "Ehm…did ya wash all of our clothes?" he asked with a cocked eyebrow and watched how she covered her mouth.

"I thought you still had a shirt and pant to wear," Jean said and pointed at the wardrobe.

"Yeah, the stuff I wore in the morning and which is still wet, darlin'," Logan replied with a smirk.

"I'm sorry…"

"Don't be. It's you who has to sleep next to me," he waved off and went over to the wardrobe to get a blanket out of it to wrap himself into. "Thanks for cleaning up, darlin'," he smiled when she handed him the cup with tea.

While he swallowed it, she gave him a concerned look. "Isn't that too cold for you at night?" Jean asked and nodded at the think blanket.

He only smirked when he put the empty cup into the sink. "As I said…it's ya who's to sleep next to me," Logan replied and checked on the fire again before he locked the door and closed the shatters. She followed him to the bedroom with a frown in her face.

"And that means?" she asked while she opened the door to the bathroom to get ready for bed.

"That I'm sleeping on the sofa," he said and grabbed the pillow.

"What?" Jean asked and stared at him. "Why?"

"Believe me, ya won't sleep next to me when I'm freezing at night, Jean," he assured her but she blocked his way.

"Are you going to stab me all of a sudden?" she demanded to know and he cocked an eyebrow at her.

"'f course not!"

"Then go back to bed. When the fire gets out you'll freeze even more," she said and watched him going back. "What happens at night?" Jean asked curiously.

He only shrugged and pulled the sheets over his body. "Let's say I'm pretty…devoted if I start freezing…," Logan said and couldn't hide the smirk on his face when he picked up another change in her body. He waited for her to come back, dressed in his shirt and pants again. "There go my clothes…," he mumbled and gave her a look when she began to pull on something under the sheets.

"Here," Jean said and handed his pants over to him.

"I didn't say that you've to give me them, Jean," he chuckled, but she shook her head.

"I know. But I don't want you to freeze." She laid down and turned the oil lamp on her side of the bed off.

Shaking his head, he put the pants on. "Now we'll both freeze," he grunted and did the same with his lamp. "Is that warm enough for you?"

"I'm fine," she mumbled and pulled the pillow closer. "Night…"

"Night," he replied tiredly and soon drifted off to sleep while she was still awake. There were still too many thoughts flying around in her head to make it possible for her to find any sleep. She heard him turning around in bed and closed her eyes. Maybe she should have listened to him that it was too cold in a shirt only, but still it was better than letting him freeze next to her. Startling when she awoke out of her daydream, she felt how he suddenly cuddled closely up to her in his sleep. Jean couldn't help but smile a bit. She'd actually thought that he'd been joking about being pretty devoted when he froze at night. Not being unhappy about it that he pulled her even closer, she felt how she got warmer and the thoughts finally stopped distracting her from falling asleep…

Yeah, I know, it doesn't happen a lot in this one here, but well. I wanted to start it slow. Thanks to all who've reviewed: ) I'll try to put the next chapter up soon! See ya!