Love and Pain lie close together

The snow had finally melted and flowers and trees were blooming. Jean enjoyed sitting on the outside and just watch how the wind played with the green grass, the leaves of the trees or the colorful flowers around her. The sun stood high in the cloudless blue sky and from where she sat she could hear and see the small river. She closed her eyes to allow the soft sunbeams to caress her face and long hair. The light made it appear to be even redder than it usually was. While she sat there in the grass and waited for Logan to come back, she began to think about her life now. She couldn't deny that she was relaxes and happy. It was not as if she'd just forgotten about her actions, but by now she could deal with it. She knew there was no way possible to redeem it and it still hurt her to think about the Professor or Scott. Especially Scott, but she felt too happy in the here and now to go on punishing and hating herself for it. Opening her eyes again she looked at the wood that was not far away from the cabin, hoped to see him somewhere… Sighing, since she couldn't find what she was looking for, Jean let herself fall backwards into the grass and crossed her arms behind her head. With closed eyes again she just allowed her mind to float…

In the past, she'd have never expected that a life with him somewhere away from any other social contacts or civilization could be so soothing and good. She enjoyed every minute of them being together. By now it even appeared to her as if it had never been any different, as if they'd always, right from the beginning, had been at the cabin. Back then, when Jean had read his mind after he'd set a foot into the school, she had seen the violence, anger and hate within his mind. But she'd also been surprised, and that's what she'd told the Professor, that there was this strong sense of honor and gentleness within Logan. She could especially enjoy the latter everyday. He practically cherished her every time he had the chance to do it and it felt great. It felt right and she wouldn't want to miss it anymore. If she was truly honest with herself, she couldn't wait in the morning to open her eyes and see him, while she waited impatiently the whole day through for the night to come, so that she could go to bed and cuddle with him. Not being able to stop a giggle, since she felt like a young school girl, Jean smiled.

"Ya know what they say 'bout people who laugh without anything to laugh about, right?" a deep, but soft voice asked and she opened her eyes to be blinded by the sun. Above her stood Logan, a dead deer carried on both shoulders, while he cocked an eyebrow at her. "What's so funny?"

"Nothing," Jean smiled. "You caught one?" she added and looked at the animal. She still remembered too well how he'd returned one day with a deer on his back for them to eat. He truly was a hunter from nature…

Yeah. I'm gonna skin it so that we can eat it for dinner later." He began to walk over to a spot next to the cabin, where he always skinned the animals he'd caught or chopped wood in the winter.

She watched him closely and wondered if his extraordinary skills as a hunter had something to do with his feral nature and had come naturally to him, or if he had to learn it by himself to survive while he lived alone. Either way, Jean was completely fascinated by it. Especially since he always refused to accept her offer to help out with her powers if necessary. Heaving a deep breath to enjoy the fresh air again, she got up and straightened her clothes to walk over to him and sit down on the bench next to the cabin. Even if it disgusted her to see him working on the animal, she still couldn't get enough of seeing him working so professionally and smoothly. "You wanted to go down to go down to the village tomorrow morning, right?" she asked after a moment and he looked up; small bead of sweat on his forehead were glittering in the sunlight and he wipe them away with the back of his left hand.

"Yeah, why?" he asked and went on with his work.

"I wanted to come with you again," Jean replied and moved her feet up and down a bit. "I wanted to see a doctor…"

"Are ya sick?" Logan asked instantly and froze in his movement to give her a worried look.

"No." She shook her head. "I only wanted to do a check up, you know. To make sure that everything's fine." Holding his gaze for a while she could tell that he wasn't convinced at all. "Back at the school I did it at least once a year… Don't worry about anyone finding out! I'll make them forget that I was there." Finally shrugging he concentrated on the deer again, still being watched by her.

After they had eaten dinner, they walked over to the small lake in the dark. While she held onto his hand, Jean had her eyes fixed on the stars in the dark sky and smiled when the light of the full moon was reflected on the water. He let go of her hand to get rid of his clothes, making her do the same, before they dived into the cold water. "Jeez," Jean gasped and held onto him as he only chuckled. "I can't remember that it was that cold the last time…" Shivering slightly she pressed herself against his body and wrapped her arms around his neck.

Nuzzling it with his nose, Logan pulled her closer and placed a kiss on it. "We were two hours earlier last time… And ya know that it cools down pretty fast."

"Yes, but not that fast…," she shivered and made him laugh again.

"C'mon," he said and swam over to the shore again where he laid down in the grass as naked as he was and just enjoyed the feeling of it. "What's wrong?" Logan asked after a moment since she was still in the water. "I thought you're cold?!"

"Yes, but…"

Shaking his head he smirked and placed one arm behind his back. "It's dark, Jeannie, we're alone in the mountains, so no one can see ya!" he said and added with a grin. "…well, except me…" Sighing, she looked around first, before she left the water quickly and kneeled down next to him. As her hand touched her shirt, he grabbed her wrist. "What are ya doin' now?!" Logan asked and the moonlight was reflected in his eyes due to his nightvision.

"Getting dresses," Jean replied calmly.

"Why?"

"…because I am naked?!" she asked in her best "Why else?!"-tone.

"And?" he asked instead and pulled her over to him to position her in front of him. "I like ya naked…" Hearing his husky voice always made her shiver, but due to the cold air she shivered even more.

"What do you have in mind?" she demanded to know and felt him kneeling down behind her, while he forced her upper body up against his. She gasped when his arms quickly went around her slim form and he began to suck and lick on the pulse point on her neck. One more thing she was more than surprised about… He did it and made her forget instantly about her worries. Right now she just forgot about the fact that they were out her naked and that down in the grass on a lake somewhere in the Canadian mountains…

"Jeannie?" she heard him whispering against her ear and opened her eyes.

"Hm?"

He kissed her neck again, the side of her jaw before one hand stroked over her cheek, breast and belly. "Ya know that I love ya, right?"

"Yes, I do," the redhead replied after she'd wrapped her hands around his neck and leant back against him.

Kissing her neck once more he stopped to look at her from aside. He still held her close with one arm while his free hand caressed her soft skin and he could tell that she enjoyed it. "You know…," Logan went on and drew circles with one finger around her navel, causing her to close her eyes and lean further back against him. "...the animal in me wants something…, needs something. He's hitting on me with that from the moment we met at the school…"

Turning her head a bit Jean looked at him with a slight frown. "What does Wolverine want?" she asked calmly and began to feel nervous since he hesitated with his answer.

"He wants to mark ya…"

"Mark me?!"

He nodded and kept his eyes low. "From the moment I saw ya, he wants me to mark ya."

"Mark me as what?" she asked, still not really understanding what he meant.

"As his mate," Logan explained calmly and inhaled her scent briefly. "His partner…"

She let her hands sink a bit and looked at the lake while she began to shiver again. "How?" she asked and turned her head to search for his eyes in the moonlight. "I mean…will it hurt?"

"I'd never hurt ya!" he said instantly and pulled a strand out of her face. "Is it okay for ya? Will ya be my mate?" Hopefully waiting for her answer, he rested his chin on her shoulder.

"What does it mean? For him, I mean," Jean asked and looked at him from aside. "Let's say from Wolverine's way of thinking to ours."

"Somethin' like…," Logan began and thought hard about a way to describe it. If he was honest, he didn't know it either. As far as he remembered, he'd never asked this of someone before. "Well… How good do ya know wolves?"

"Only the things I learned at school…"

"It means something like…partner in life. It shows who ya belong to…"

"Like a wedding band?" Jean asked and felt him shrugging behind her.

"Somethin' like that. Just without the metal…"

Still playing with the hair on his arms, the redhead thought about it. "And what will he do?"

"I don't know," Logan said truthfully. "I never asked this of someone else before… At least as far as I can remember…" It was easy for him to pick up on her inner conflict and fear, so he touched her cheek to make her look at him. "It's okay if ya don't want it. Its only what he wants…"

"And what do you want?" she asked surprisingly.

Stroking over her cheek gently he broke eye contact for less than a second. "Ya know what I want…"

"Then let him do it," she replied with a stern look and made him frown.

"Ya sure?"

Touching his cheek with a smile, Jean nodded and turned fully around. "Yeah. Just tell me what I've to do…"

He heaved a deep breath and let go of her cheek. "Turn around again," he said and waited for her do so, before he pulled her up against his chest again. A gasp escaped her lips as he began to lick and suck on her neck again; his tongue caressing the pulse point in a way that made her ache for more. She couldn't see how the light was reflected in his now black eyes, nor that they looked feral and wanting now or that his rational way of thinking had been replaced by a simple primal one. Right now she was nothing more to him than the female he craved for, the one he wanted as his mate, the female he wanted to mark as his. Wolverine smirked as he slowly pushed her down, but she suddenly gasped as a low growl in excitement escaped his throat. Jean turned her head a bit to stare at him with widened eyes. She noticed the sudden change in him, felt the firmer grip on and around her waist that held her immobile against his body and couldn't hide that she was scared. Never before had she met the feral side in him. She couldn't tell what he was about to do or what he'd do if she refused to obey. Logan had told her only minutes ago that he wouldn't hurt her, but was it also valid for him? Not knowing what to do, Jean pressed against his effort to push her down.

He growled as he noticed it. Unable to understand why she refused to do what he wanted, Wolverine let go of her waist with his right hand and bent more over her. While he was on his knees he placed the hand now next to her shoulder to support himself with it. Due to his now heavy weight on her back, she was practically forced onto her knees with a shriek. Beginning to pant when he growled again, Jean thought her heart would begin to burst in her chest. The pressure she could unmistakably feel against her legs made his intuition more than clear. Not knowing him or how different he was from Logan, she was afraid that he would just force her and was about to use her powers as he suddenly began to nuzzle her cheek with his nose and an almost cat-like purr.

Nuzzling her again since her fear overwhelmed him, Wolverine guessed that something he did or was about to do caused his female to react that way. Even he refused to take her like this. He wanted the female to enjoy it, to be an active participant. He felt her relaxing slowly under his caressing and used his free hand to stroke down from her neck to her thighs. He smiled when she closed her eyes and pressed a bit more against him…and he knew he had her where he wanted her to be…

When Logan regained consciousness again her directly looked at the stars in the sky. It took a while before he noticed the warmth next to him and raised his head a bit. Smiling since she was asleep, he reached out to shake her gently. By now it became way too cold to stay outside naked and without thick blankets. "Jeannie?" he asked softly and made her moan a bit before she finally began to move.

"What's wrong?" Jean asked drowsily and opened her eyes. "We have to go back. It's too cold." Getting up after he pulled a strand out of her face, he got their clothes. Handing Jean her ones he began to get dressed and looked at her afterwards. He noticed that she didn't speak a lot and began to feel worried. "He didn't hurt ya, did he?" Logan asked concerned and made her look up.

"No…, no he didn't," the redhead said and saw that he wasn't convinced. With a brief look to the lake she walked over to him and placed her hands on his chest. "I'm fine."

Nodding, Logan looked up to meet her gaze. "What did he do?"

"What do you think?"

"Jean… What did he do?!" he asked again with a look. "I don't know what he did, so tell me…"

With a smile she began to pull him with her. "If you promise to behave…," she purred and stroked down his chest to his belly, before she grabbed his belt to drag him over to the cabin. "…then I might show you…"

Making an impressed face playfully, he followed her. "Everything?" he asked and wobbled his head.

"Only if you purr like a kitten again," Jean giggled and made him stop dead in the tracks.

"I did NOT!" Logan complained but she nodded with a smirk.

"You did! Not only once…" Biting her lower lip smiling the redhead began to pull him with her again, ignoring his shocked stare.

I'm sorry that updating with that one here took so long. I first had no idea what to write and then on late Sunday night LOL, I suddenly had this idea. Hope you guys liked it! Thanks to all reviewers! Please let me know what you think! ; ) See ya!!