Love and Pain lie close together
She left the building still with her eyes fixed on the papers she held. After Jean had visited one doctor, this one had sent her over to another one, who'd given her more or less a bunch of papers she stared at now. Completely lost in thoughts she stood on the street and looked at them as a hand touched her shoulder. "Everythin' alright?" Startling with a loud shriek she made a jump backwards and hit the wall with her back. Her heart was nearly bursting her chest as she noticed who was standing next to her. Concerned Logan cocked an eyebrow at her. "Hey, darlin', is everythin' alright? You're paler than snow…" With his eyes fixed on her he made a step into her direction, as she quickly packed the papers away, which made him only the more suspicious. "What's wrong? Are ya sick?"
"No… I'm fine," Jean said and gave him a smile of which he knew it was faked. "I'm hungry, what about you?" Linking arms with him she dragged him away from the building towards the small restaurant they'd once eaten in. After they'd sat down and she'd taken a menu into her hands to study it, Logan remained opposite her with his arms crossed and stared holes into it. "I'll take the 35 with a salad and you?"
"The chance to ask again what's wrong with ya!" he grunted and she let her card sink. "I know ya good enough by now tell that you're acting' weird."
Only staring at him for a moment she closed the menu and put it back onto the table. "It's nothing," Jean said again and shook her head for emphasis. "I'm fine. You only scared the hell out of me…"
"I scared the hell outta ya 'cause ya were too absorbed in readin'," he gave back. "And I can tell that you're lyin'!"
"I'm not!" she said again as the waitress stopped next to their table.
"What can I bring you?" the blonde woman asked and held her small notepad and pencil ready in her hands.
"Number 35, a salad and a water, please," Jean said and still held Logan's staring gaze.
"And for you, sir?"
"The same but with a coke," he grunted and the woman disappeared again with a nod.
"If everythin's alright, then what were those papers?" he demanded to know and she sighed.
"Isn't it enough if I say that everything's fine?" she asked and sounded slightly annoyed.
"Nope!"
"Jeez, Logan! He asked why I haven't made a check-up so long and I told him that I moved away from my old home and couldn't make it, since I can't tell him that I was dead for some time and are now hiding from the authorities, right?! So he sent me to the other one and the papers were just…information an some advises," she explained quickly and added an annoyed "Satisfied?!".
Chuckling he shook his head with a smirk. "You're a good storyteller, ya know? My senses tell me if someone's lyin', Jean. And you are!" Seeing how she was about to say something, he quickly raised his hands. "Ya don't wanna talk about it, fine with me. But I hope ya know that I'm worried." He looked up when the waitress came back and served the food and drinks.
"Here you go," the woman smiled and left again.
"Damn…," he cursed. "Why didn't ya tell me that 35 was fish?"
Shrugging, she began to eat. "You could have just asked…"
"I hate fish…" Making a disgusted face Logan began to turn the fish with his fork.
"You can read, can't you?" she asked angered and without looking at him.
Not saying anything else he reluctantly swallowed the fish and potatoes and followed her back outside afterwards. There he grabbed her hand to make her stop. "You're really fine?"
By hearing his voice she could tell that he was clearly worried and took his hand. "I am," Jean said once more. "Nothing's wrong with me…" She saw how he narrowed his eyes again a bit as he'd done it before. "Am I lying again?!"
Staring at her for a moment longer Logan finally shook his head. "No…"
"Good. Can we go and buy food and everything else we need now?" she asked and walked further down the street towards the mall.
The next hours she spent her time with dragging him through it and got everything they needed, before they packed their backpacks, he two additional bags and headed back to the cabin. Reaching it when it was already dark they packed the things away and showered. When Jean left the bathroom and had already changed for bed, she entered the living room where he was cooking something. "You're hungry again?" she asked and sat down on the couch to watch some TV.
"What do ya think?" Logan gave back and put the chicken soup onto a plate. "I hate fish… Do ya want a bit, too?"
"No, thanks."
Shrugging he sat down next to her and began to eat while he cocked an eyebrow again at the show she was watching. Looking to and fro between her and the TV while he ate he couldn't help but ask. "What's that?!" he asked after a moment and put the empty plate onto the table.
"Grey's Anatomy," Jean replied with a look. "You should know that by now…"
"I always concentrated on your anatomy while you were watchin' it," he smirked. "And I bet ya only watch it because of that guy." He nodded at the screen and she laughed.
"How can you tell?" she asked with a teasing smile and leant her head against her arm that rested on the seat back of the sofa.
"'Cause he's a sissy," he grunted and crossed his arms.
"Right." She nodded playfully. "So if I get that correctly, I only like sissy's huh? But that would mean you're a sissy, too…"
Snorting he gave her a look. "You wish!" Smiling she turned back to the television and went on watching the show. "It's unrealistic," he grunted next and made her frown. "The doc there. How can she carry her kid around in a hospital?"
"Well if she hasn't got anyone who helps her with it?" the redhead shrugged.
"The kid has a father, hasn't it?" he gave back and met her gaze briefly, before Jean fixed her gaze on the screen again.
"Maybe he's left her or has no time or interest?" Only hearing a snort from him, she looked on the ground when the ending credits came and turned to him afterwards. "Do you want to have children?"
Letting out a short laugh Logan shook his head. "Nope!"
"Why not?" she asked with a frown.
"Why not?!" he repeated her question in a way as if the answer was obvious and the only logical one. "First, a kid costs money, they're loud and annoyin'- Then, I can't even remember what bein' a kid was like and always felt like an alien at the mansion. And a kid changes your whole life and I don't wanna change it," Logan listed and saw how she nodded. At least, he thought, she shares the same opinion I have. That would make them living together a lot easier.
"Too late for that…," Jean replied and gave him a stern look that he, a, didn't like and b, made him suspicious and feeling uncomfortable at once.
"What do ya mean?!"
"The first doctor I visited yesterday found some irregularities in my blood as he told me today. That's why he sent me to the gynecologist, who told me in the end that I'm six weeks pregnant," Jean said dryly without breaking eye contact, but with her heart in her mouth. "The papers I was staring at were a scan and the appointment when I have to do the next scan… Plus some information…" Waiting for his outburst she held her breath and counted from ten backwards; watched how he looked at the table for about six second before he used the remaining four to raise his head again, meet her gaze and just get up to walk over to the window and stare out of it. It was then that her heart gained speed, if that was still possible. "Would you say something?" she asked calmly and carefully.
"'n what?" Logan gave back, his hands buried in his jeans pocket and turned around a bit.
Swallowing hard while tears began to gather in her eyes, Jean pulled her legs close. "Something? Anything…" She shrugged.
"Ya already know what I'm gonna say, Jean," he said and turned back to the window.
"How am I supposed to know?"
"You're a telepath, damn it," he shot back and she bit her lower lip hard. "Ya can't have a child…"
Staring at him with widened eyes Jean saw the determined look on his face and began to shake her head. "I'll keep it!"
"Keep it, eh?" Logan asked and crossed his arms while he leant against the wall. "Use your head, girl! We live in the mountains, have enough money to buy food and things for the two of us, they are probably lookin' for us and will find us sooner or later," he listed. "So how do ya wanna do it?! We can't move into the village without riskin' bein' found and ya can't walk down to it in a few months anymore. So how exactly do ya wanna do it? Or what if ya or the kid is sick?! It takes two hours to walk down in summer, four to six in the winter. What then?!" Running a hand through his hair he shook his head when he saw the tears on her cheeks. "We have barely room for the two of us here. I can pay for us, but not for everythin' a kid would need, don't ya get that?!"
"We could go somewhere else!" Jean sobbed. "We could work and rent an apartment…"
"And where?!" Logan asked aloud. "Where's this somewhere?!"
"Europe or Australia?" she gave back. "I always wanted to go to Australia…"
Giving a short laugh he couldn't help but shake his head. "Jean, ya don't even exist officially anymore! You were dead!"
Getting up she crossed her arms in an awkward manner. "There are enough people with faked ID's, Logan!"
§Right…" He nodded playfully and copied her pose. "Do ya have any idea how much a faked ID costs? Or how long and how difficult it is to get a visa, especially for someone who's dead?! And what do ya wanna do if the kid has to go to a school? It won't work, don't ya realize that?!"
Snorting and swallowing her anger she walked over to the bedroom and opened the door. "I don't care what you say, Logan!" Jean nearly yelled while she cried even heavier. "But I see this child as my second chance in life and I'll keep it! No matter with or without you!" With that she slammed the door shut behind her and he sighed heavily.
Due to his heightened senses Logan could of course hear her crying heartrendingly into a pillow, but still he knew he was right. In their current situation they could need anything, but definitely not a child. With another shake of his head he let himself fall backwards onto the sofa and ran both hands through his face. "Shit!" he cursed and slammed his left hand against the seat back.
I know it's short, but I don't have the time to write a lot currently due to my upcoming B.A. exam. I hope you like it! Thanks to all reviewers! ; ) Please let me know what you guys think about this one here, too. I'll try to update soon. See ya!!