"Life is full of risks, Akaya"
"Can't we just starve till we get out?"
"That's impossible," Marui responded with a straight face less than a millisecond later.
"It'll be a good way for you to lose all of those fats," Niou taunted.
"I'm too hungry to argue with you Niou."
Niou rolled his shoulders and commented, "You seem to have a lot of energy for a hungry person though."
Marui stopped pacing around in circles and bumping into everyone else, and turned his head around like a possessed doll. "Do I look energetic to you?" he croaked out in a feeble voice. It would have been more convincing if he actually looked haggard, but unfortunately, he did not, thus, the red head only looked like an overly dramatic queen. Or should I say, king.
"Starving till we escape is illogical Niou," Yanagi said. "Like I had said earlier, this forest could stretch out for millions of miles. We would starve to death before we even make any progress."
"Damn right." Marui pumped a fist in the air.
"I thought that you don't have any energy?" Niou glared and the self-proclaimed genius immediately continued on with his dramatic acts.
"But senpai, what if we eat something poisonous?"
"That's a risk that would have to take Akaya," Yukimura said, nodding and stroking an imaginary beard like a wise old man. "Life is full of risks."
"But I don't like the idea of dying with foam flowing out of my mouth, and having seizures or turning blue, or having my eyes turn into crosses," Kirihara remarked.
Silence.
Yagyuu coughed, clearing his throat and said, "Akaya-kun, what have you been watching?"
"Obviously not the news." Jackal rolled his eyes.
"What?" Kirihara asked, face blank.
"Eyes can't turn into crosses Akaya," Yanagi explained.
Kirihara blinked. "Senpai, are you sure? Because that's what happened to that guy on the show-"
"Eyes can't turn into crosses Akaya," Yanagi repeated.
"Guys, hello?" Marui waved his hand. "Less talking, more eating."
"Yeah eat air," Niou scoffed.
Marui's eyes widened for a moment before he started to open and close his mouth repeatedly.
"Marui-kun, what are you doing?" Yagyuu asked.
"Why is air tasteless?" Marui asked, after he was made to stop his ridiculous motions.
"Oh my goodness, this boy has gone nuts." Niou shook his head and smacked a palm onto his forehead.
"Air is not meant to be eaten…you inhale it…you don't eat it…" Yagyuu explained slowly, as if he could not believe what he was seeing, and hearing.
"But Niou said-"
"You shouldn't believe what Niou-kun says."
"So he was being sarcastic?"
Yagyuu nodded his head slowly and exaggeratedly like he was explaining something complicated to a small child. "Yes, Marui-kun. Niou-kun was being sarcastic."
Silence.
"Oh," Marui mumbled.
"And I thought the proverb says 'a hungry man is an angry man'. But Marui's case seems to be 'a hungry man is a stupid man'," Jackal whispered into Niou's ear, who grinned and nodded.
.~.
"Can we eat now?" whined Marui for the 100th time in that short period of time.
"Shh!" Yanagi hissed.
"But-" Marui started again, but he never got to finish his sentence as Jackal clamped a palm over his mouth. The Brazilian made a disgusted face but did not let go of Marui even when the red head started to lick his palm.
The eight regulars were spying on a few oak coloured and green spotted (seems like everything in that forest was weird) birds and Marui's constant whining might scare the birds away, hindering their (or Yanagi's) collection of data.
Why were they spying on birds like creeps?
Basically, Yanagi had a brilliant idea and suggested that if they were to find edible, non-poisonous food in this forest, the best thing to do was to observe what the native animals eat. Thus, they hunted around for any animals in the forest, and Kirihara spotted a few oak coloured and green spotted birds, which led to them following the birds, and turning out like stalkers. An interesting adventure indeed.
Luckily for them, the birds had landed onto ground level and were pecking on a few odd bowl shaped fruits (at least, that's what the tennis players thought it was).
"I think those should be safe to eat," Yanagi whispered.
"Are you sure Renji? There are probably food that birds can eat and humans can't," Sanada questioned.
"Now, now, we don't have any other options do we Sanada?" Yukimura said.
"Fukubuchou might be right though buchou," Kirihara urged. 'I can't believe that I agreed with Sanada-fukubuchou on something.'
"Akaya, do you remember that life is full of risks? This is one of them," Yukimura reminded, stroking his invisible beard again.
"Buchou, what are you doing?" Kirihara gestured with his hand, referring to Yukimura's invisible beard stroking motion.
Yukimura tilted his head in confusion.
"That-" Kirihara imitated, "-action."
"I have no idea what you're talking about," Yukimura replied with a straight face, his hands fell down to his side.
Kirihara decided to drop that subject then and there.
"AH MARUI!" Jackal yelled, and heads whipped around only to see a flash of red pass by them towards the oak coloured and green spotted birds.
Chirp! The birds flew off immediately upon seeing the intruder.
Marui grabbed a handful of the bowl shaped fruits and popped them into his mouth (they were small, like the size of grapes). The other regulars slowly emerged from behind the trees and tip toed their way over to the red head, eyes wide as they watched Marui munch on the fruits gleefully.
"How did he escape?" Sanada hissed.
"I don't know! He just ran off!" Niou replied.
"Jackal-kun was restraining him," Yagyuu said.
Jackal placed his palms together in a praying position and apologised, "I'm sorry! I let him run off!"
Yukimura waved a hand to silence the regulars and the surrounded the red head, still intensely watching him pop another handful of the bowl shaped fruits into his wide-opened mouth.
The regulars stood with their arms in front of them, as if ready to catch the red head if he fell, however, their legs were apart, in a position prepared to run should anything happen, contradicting with the position of their arms.
Seconds ticked by and a small bead of perspiration flowed down Kirihara's cheek.
"You guys should try it! It tastes like tuna mixed with mustard! I prefer something sweet but this is good too!" Marui exclaimed, food particles fell out of his mouth as he spoke.
The seven regulars eyed each other before Niou muttered, "He looks like he's fine…"
"It's probably safe then," Jackal added.
They shifted a little when Yanagi stopped them.
"What is it?" Yukimura asked.
"What if…the effects don't come immediately?"
Their heads snapped back towards Marui and they stared and stared at him.
10.
9.
8.
7.
6.
5.
4.
3.
2.
1.
"Okay, it's probably safe then." Yanagi shrugged and they all dropped their 'on alert' stances.
"Oi, Marui, don't eat all of them," Jackal said, stretching out his hand, which was cupped to look like a bowl, as if asking his partner to share some of the fruits with him.
Marui shook his head furiously and shielded the fruits that was in his palm. "Go and look at that big leaf over there, there's loads there."
"Marui-kun, don't eat with your mouth open," Yagyuu suddenly said, and curious looks were directed at the gentleman.
"Huh? How do I eat with my mouth not open?" Marui said, more food particles fell out as he spoke and Yagyuu grimaced.
Clearing his throat and adjusting his glasses, Yagyuu said, "I meant, don't speak with your mouth open."
"…"
"Yagyuu, you alright?" Niou asked, placing a hand on his doubles partner's shoulder, concerned.
"I'm fine Niou-kun. And I meant, don't speak with your mouth full, Marui-kun."
The other regulars snapped out of their trance and voiced, "Ohhh…"
"That made sense now," Yanagi remarked.
"Whew." Niou removed his hand from Yagyuu's shoulder and placed it over his chest. "I thought that even Yagyuu disappeared over to the land of loonies with fatty."
"HEY! I resent that statement!" Marui yelled. "First of all, I AM NOT FAT. Do I have to keep repeating myself? Secondly, I'm not a loony!"
Even after Marui had stopped yelling and continued to eat, Niou still looked at him as though he was waiting for something else.
"What?" Marui asked, when he noticed Niou's stare.
"Oh, you were done?" Niou shook his head. "I thought that there would be a thirdly."
"Huh?"
"Never mind."
Yagyuu cleared his throat again and tugged on his collar. "I am terribly sorry for my mistake." He paused. "Mistakes."
Niou patted the gentleman on the back and softly said, "Don't worry. It happens."
"Marui-senpai…did you say that it tastes like tuna mixed with mustard?" Kirihara dangled a bowl shaped fruit in the air and stared at it.
"Yeah." Marui nodded. "It's pretty good you know?"
"Somehow I don't think tuna mixed with mustard sounds appetising."
"Oh, just try it." Marui rolled his eyes and stuffed a bowl shaped fruit into the younger boy's mouth. "Bite. Chew. Whatever. Just don't spit it out. Honestly, you guys need to trust me more often, I'm not a genius for nothing."
"No one, besides yourself, calls you a genius," Niou said, as he popped a fruit into his mouth.
"They so do!"
"Yeah…righttt…" Niou drawled. "Who?"
"Ewww…" Kirihara cried out, his tongue hanging out of his mouth as he tried to get rid of the taste of the bowl shaped fruit from it. "How do you stand this?"
"What?" Marui asked, between mouthfuls.
Yukimura swallowed. "I have to admit, these aren't exactly the best."
"Worse than dog food," Niou said.
"How do you know what dog food tastes like?" Jackal raised an eyebrow.
Niou gave the Brazilian a blank stare. "You don't want to know."
"I see…" Jackal backed away.
"…" Sanada made no complaints, but the look on his face explained enough.
"Geez, if all you guys do is complain, then don't eat them! More for me then!" Marui shouted.
"I don't think that that's a good idea Marui…" Jackal pulled the red head away from the source of the fruits. "We're still not that certain whether it's safe to eat or not. Better not to eat that much."
"Wait. So we weren't completely sure whether it's safe?" Kirihara asked, wide-eyed. Yanagi and Yukimura exchanged looks before nodding.
Kirihara's jaw dropped open and he spluttered like a fish out of water, "S-so, yo-you made me eat something that had the potential to kill me?"
"Pretty much," Niou drawled.
"Risks, Akaya, risks," Yukimura reminded the green eyed boy yet again. "Life is full of them."
"H-how could you?!" Kirihara exclaimed, stomping his foot like a child throwing a tantrum.
"No one said that we couldn't." Yukimura shrugged.
Chirp!
The tennis players turned at the sound of a bird chirping, and spotted a red coloured, with a beak the shape of a pelican's, and brown striped bird. That particular bird, about the size of a 3 year old toddler, walked up to the tennis players, ignoring them, and swallowed a few of the bowl shaped fruits that they were eating earlier.
Suddenly, there was a loud thump!
The tennis players nearly jumped five feet in the air at the sight of the bird collapsing after just swallowing a few of those fruits. They stared at the remaining fruits that they had in their palms, and back at the collapsed bird, before screaming (very manly screams, mind you), chucking the fruits down onto the ground, and high-tailing out of that area.
Such fine men they were…
A/N: Yagyuu's blunder with his words for the "don't speak with your mouth full" was what my friend did. It took her about 3 tries before she got it right. It was funny...at that time... Amy was almost rolling on the floor and I nearly choked on my food, which was scary... So credits to Ariel for that. :)
By the way, I don't know what mustard tastes like, so if you like it mixed with tuna (do you even mix it with tuna?), well...let's just say that the Rikkai regulars have different tastes then :)