I'm not really sure how to explain this but I hope you enjoy it.
Harry Potter isn't mine If it was I'm fairly certain Sirius wouldn't be dead.
Sirius Black lay on soiled sheets cuddled in James' arms. The boys had be Letting off Steam, James' words not Sirius', with each other for some time but Sirius wanted something more. The Black boy was a lot more invested in their fragile relationship than Potter. Sirius loved James, James loved Lily and Sirius was always the one getting hurt for it. The only time James ever had time for Sirius involved the two of them naked in some secluded corner of the castle where nobody would see them and in effect realize their sexuality. No one could know that the Potter prince got off with other guys. Sirius didn't mind the sex, hell most of the time he lived for it but sometimes he wanted his best friend back. It shouldn't be too much to ask to spend time with ones best friend but some annoying red headed skirt ruined all of that, just one step in her master plan to ruin what was left of Sirius Black, his parents had destroyed the rest of him.
James placed a chaste kiss on Sirius forehead and rolled away to find his trousers. "Thanks Pads. I'm meeting Lily's parents for dinner in an hour. Wish me luck."
Sirius watched a tear fall in to the cotton beneath him before rolling over to give James an award winning and fake smile, "Just don't mention hanging her ex-best friend upside down by his shorts and you'll be fine." And with that James left the room.
An hour later found Sirius crouched over a toilet in the Marauders' dormitory, his face a shade of pale green with Remus Lupin's hesitant hand rubbing his back. "Sirius please let me take you to the hospital wing; you've been doing this for over a month."
"I'm fine Moony" Sirius managed to choke out before he resumed vomiting.
"I got him some water Remus." Came a rat like voice from the open door behind them. "I haven't seen anyone puke this much since my sister was pregnant with my nephew."
"What?" Padfoot asked tiredly as he collapsed against the werewolf and made weak grabby hands at the water Peter was holding.
"I said that you reminded me of my sister when she was pregnant. She puked a lot too." Peter's cheeks were red and his eyes were trained on the floor as he handed over the glass. That was the last of the subject, at least for a while.
About two weeks later Remus found Sirius curled up on James' bed, crying softly and clutching at his lower abdomen. The animagus wasn't wearing any pants; his trousers had been chucked across the room and were lying at the foot of Peter's bed, and his shirt was hanging open. "What's wrong Siri?"
"James called me fat, my trousers won't button, I want a strawberry sundae with cheese sauce, I'm horny as hell and James won't fuck me because I'm fat. I've haven't been able to keep anything but strawberry ice cream down for almost four months and I've be doing sit ups every night till I pass out do I shouldn't be fat. What am I doing wrong?" More tears streamed down the boy's face with every passing second. "Why doesn't he love me Moony?"
The werewolf wasn't sure what to say so he took an approach he deemed safe, well an approach that always worked with girls anyways. "You aren't fat Padfoot."
"Yes I am. Remus look." Sirius rolled over exposing his bare chest and stomach to Remus.
Remus was shocked by Sirius' once lean Adonis body. His nipples were red and the area surrounding them was slightly puffy. Firm washboard abs were now a convex mound lined with faint stretch marks. Sirius didn't look fat he looked pregnant and Remus said as much to him which was apparently a wrong move. Remus' remarked just caused the tears to fall even faster. "I can't be pregnant. I can't be. Remmie tell me I can't be. Please. Please?"
"Sirius I can't lie to you, it's entirely possible considering you blood line and the amount you and James have been sneaking around but it is also unlikely. Nevertheless there is a simple spell I can cast to let you know for sure."
"If I am pregnant you'll still stay right?" Sirius asked the tears flowing slower now.
"Of course." Remus flicked his wand and a soft blue light shone from the swell of Sirius' stomach. "Siri you're-"
Sirius cut him off. "I know. I've known for weeks, since Peter brought up his sister I just didn't want to admit it. What if James doesn't want it Moony? What if he chooses Lily over us?"
Moony blinked rapidly in a futile attempt to keep the tears from falling. "Not it, him Pads, What if James doesn't want him; you're having a son."
"A boy?" Remus' nod caused the tears to fall all over again but this time they were tears of joy.
After that things began to fall in to place. James and Lily had a row that left their relationship in shambles, James and Sirius started speaking again and all was well until Sirius went into labour.
James and Sirius were on their way home from a pint at the Three Broomsticks, well Siri had had water, after classes when Sirius collapsed. "Pads what's wrong?" James was frantic.
"It's nothing. Just a little dizzy, help me stand." Sirius rasped his left hands reaching for James while the right gripped his stomach. No sooner than James had the boy upright Sirius screamed.
The blue eyed boy was shaking and a few tears leaked from the corner of his eyes. "Pads what wrong?"
"Not-" Sirius tried but stopped in favor of screaming again.
"Sirius something is obviously wrong, just tell me."
"I think I'm in Labour."
James froze and his eyes went wide. "What?"
"I think I'm in labour!"
"I am pregnant. James please? He's coming now." Siri whimpered as another contraction hit. The contractions were less than a minute apart and Sirius mentally kicked himself for not telling James about the baby. Remus was supposed to be with him now. They'd had it all planned out. When Sirius went into labour he and Remus would sneak off to the room of requirement where Remus would act as Sirius' mid wife. Then once Sirius was strong enough he would take the baby to Hogsmead through one of the hidden passageways. Moony was the only one who knew about the baby, Sirius had kept and undetectable engorgement charm on all of his clothes since he had started showing six months before. James didn't know about the baby, James wasn't supposed to know about the baby.
James was panicking. He had no idea how to deliver a baby. "Siri I need you to stand for a minute on your own ok? I'm going to lay my robe on the ground and then you can lay on that."
"Ok. James use my robe to." Sirius mumbled as he leaned heavily against the wall and pulled at his robe between contractions. When he finally managed to get his robe of and hand it to James Siri had also got the old muggle t-shirt he was wearing underneath off, showing his stomach. Sirius was huge; it looked as if he'd swallowed a large cauldron.
The sight of Sirius's belly took James by surprise as he lay his friend down on the makeshift bed and pulled down his friend's pants. "Siri I see a head, you need to push ok?"
A few minutes later James had a slimy, bawling baby in his hands, "Pads it's a boy"
"Give him to me." Sirius demanded weakly. The boy wasn't yet in his father's hands when another contraction gripped Padfoot. "James! James what's happening?"
Using Sirius' discarded shirt James wrapped up the baby and lay him on the ground before turning back to his shaking friend. "Pads there's another head. I think you're having twins. Can you push for me again?"
Five minutes later another boy was born and the two teenagers sagged with exhaustion. James looked at the second baby, the one still squirming in his arms and saw an almost familiar face with hazel eyes. "Siri are they mine?" but before James could get his answer Sirius passed out.
"James! Sirius!" Remus and Peter shouted as they found there friends covered in blood. "What happened?"
"Sirius just had babies." James' eyes were still trained on the child in his arms.
Peter looked confused as Remus picked the first baby up from where he lay by James. "I think they're alright. Wormy take him I'll carry Pads."
Another hour found the six of them back in the Marauder's dormitory with the twins clean and swaddled in a basinet transfigured from Remus' chess board, Sirius in an old t-shirt asleep in his bed and James demanding answers Moony was reluctant to give. "I don't know Prongs. He was four months along when I found out. I just agreed to help. It was his decision."
"But Moo-"
Before James could finish Sirius let out a strangled, "James" and flailed.
"Shh. Pads it's okay. You're fine. Your sons are beautiful."
Sirius smiled gently. "Our sons."
James was right. Their sons were indeed beautiful. Pollux Remus Potter and Castor Regulas Potter both had James' wild hair and Sirius' noble features. The pair were mischievous like their fathers and best friends but the stories of what they got up to with the Weasley twins are stories for another day.
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~ListeningtoGrace