Foosha: Where do I begin...? Well... it all started with finals, then I found out I was moving out, and then I failed chemistry, and then I got a new job and then... Vash moved in with me! And I got a kitteh! So not all was bad! But I am very very very very very very very very very sorry that I've failed you as an author and I hope you don't hate me too much. I'm trying to get into a routine again!

Vash: I'm here to make sure she does exactly that.

Nicky: So without further hesitation... here is the update! *throws confetti*

Vash: Also, Foosha does not own anybody but us and her craziness, which is very evident in this chapter.

Nicky: Let's gooooo!

Rin's House

"Well ma'am, it seems you were correct about the cat." The officer mumbled, befuddled, as he held the frightened animal in his arms. Once they encountered the cat in the closet, they realized there was no room left for anyone to be able to fit and gave up their search, much to Rin's relief. Where are they then? She had thought, but quickly dismissed the notion when the officer's brought her back to attention.

"We'll leave you alone now. It appears that the tip we received was false. Sorry to have caused a disturbance." Rin just nodded slowly and led the officers up the stairs to the front door. They tipped their hats and left, the last one out handing the calm cat over to Rin before making his exit. The young girl released a shaky sigh, closing the screen door behind them and turning towards the living room.

"That was close," Konan commented as she appeared next to the sofa. The rest of the group began to trickle out of their hiding spots, Pein and Konan leading as usual. Rin glanced around the room, still in a slight daze, but came to her senses when she realized something was off.

"Hey… we need to find Nicky and Vash. They're probably still hiding." The ninja nodded and went their separate ways to look around the house. Rin gripped onto Konan's capris suddenly, a worrisome look on her face. Surprised, Konan just patted her back lightly.

"You were very brave. Nicky would be proud." Rin gave a nervous nod and followed Konan to the basement.

Elsewhere… Nicky's POV

"What the… where the hell…?"

Realizing I had been asleep, or unconscious, I willed my eyes to open, though that became nearly impossible when a blinding light flooded my vision.

"Nicky, wake up!"

Vash? Once my eyes finally adjusted enough, I was able to focus on a dark figure beside me, which turned out to be a confused looking Vash.

"Oh good, you're okay," she sighed, relieved. I nodded to her and sat up slowly, shaking my head before looking around at my setting.

"Vash… where are we?"

Before us sprawled a blanket of sand in all directions. Nothing but dunes and dust clouds could be seen in the distance, rendering me with a deep feeling of dread filling the pit of my stomach.

Vash looked around as well, as if she noticed her surroundings for the first time. Her eyes grew wide.

"What the hell? Where the fuck are we?" Vash exclaimed loudly, sounding as equally frantic as I was beginning to feel, "Oh shit… my glasses…" I glanced towards her, only somewhat aware of the fact that she was cradling her severely cracked glasses in her hands. My own mind was spinning out of control, forcing me to hold my head to try to steady myself.

Shit. Here comes the delayed motion sickness. I leaned over my side to puke, but only a dry cough came out. Suddenly there was a hand on my shoulder and I looked up to meet Vash's worried gaze.

"I'm okay. Just motion sick… give me a second and I'll be okay."

Ten Minutes Later…

Once I was confident that I could process things properly, I sat up from my laying position to examine the landscape again. Vash had sat there silently the whole time I had spent calming myself down.

"Okay… let's go over this. We were in Rin's house… and then… then we were hiding… there was a cat…"

"And now we're suddenly in the middle of fucking nowhere? Unless we're having some sort of connected dream, I don't see how the hell this is possible," Vash muttered, squinting her eyes towards my direction. I started to pinch my arm, already knowing for a fact that even if I was in a dream, I'd never actually think of doing that. Suddenly a scary thought drifted into my brain, infecting the rest of my body with violent shaking.

"We aren't though… oh my god. We're stranded! Forever! We're going to die! I don't know any survival skills! I forgot them all!" Suddenly there was a hand on my face.

"Ah sorry… I can't see very well. I meant to pat your shoulder," Vash mumbled, quickly moving her hand to the intended place on my shoulder. "We have to keep calm… or something like that. We just have to… oh my god," she leaned back from me cursing under her breath, "I'm never going to get my pharmacy license! All that fucking work for nothing and I was only a month away! What the hell kind of fate is this?" She suddenly slumped against me, drowning in her failure. Thinking about her words, I realized what we'd really be missing.

"What's going to happen to all our stuff? And our house? What about the kitties? Our families… we'll never see anyone we know again… *sniff sniff*"

Inevitably, tears began to roll down my cheeks. There was a sniffle from beside me and I realized Vash was crying, making me cry harder, for Vash wasn't one to cry easily. The situation was hopeless.

"Here they are."

Startled by the new voice, I jumped slightly away from the sound, stumbling and falling flat on my back. A shadow came over my vision and suddenly hands were upon me. Vash let out some shouts of protest as we were roughly picked up, and carried away from our fate, and into another potentially dangerous situation. Either we're being kidnapped or saved… though I think they would have actually tried talking to us more if we were being saved. Fuuuuuuuck. We're going to die.

Meanwhile in the real world…

"How could they just disappear like that? It doesn't make sense. They wouldn't just leave us," Konan reasoned as they gathered around the small table in Nicky and Vash's basement home. After searching through Francesca and Rin's homes, they realized both Vash and Nicky were completely missing. The group of ninja had left Rin at her own home, telling her to stay in case the missing girls showed up. The Akatsuki on the other hand decided to meet up at Nicky and Vash's basement home to regroup.

"It's too bad that they don't seem to hold chakra, or they would have been found long ago," Sasori grumbled, tapping his fingers in an irritated manner on the couch armrest. "Why do we need them again?" Hidan nodded.

"Yeah, he's fucking right. We don't need those bitches! Let's just destroy this fucking world," he growled, hands balled into fists. Kakuzu whacked the albino upside the head, mumbling in annoyance.

"You idiot. We've already been over the consequences of doing that. Have you forgotten that you have no scythe either?"

"Fuck that. I'll find something else to kill them with!"

The two continued to argue back and forth, Sasori adding his own opinion in occasionally. Pein remained quiet, as if in deep thought, when Tobi appeared by his side.

"Tobi thinks that something happened to the girlies." Deidara scoffed.

"Pfft, how do you know that, hm?"

"Tobi just knows!"

"I agree…" Itachi added. Kisame was also shaking his head in an accepting motion behind the circle of men. Pein glanced between the three who agreed.

"Then… we will have to continue looking. Perhaps… they have stumbled upon the portal by mistake…"

Suddenly, Zetsu emerged through the floor, eyes wide.

"Leader, we found something."

Nicky's POV

I awoke for the second time that day, though at that moment, I was lying on a cold floor instead of warm sand. At least I think it's the same day… oh my god… we were kidnapped. Frantically, I sat up, though slowly so I wouldn't feel ill. Vash was nowhere in sight. It appeared that we had been placed in individual cells, complete with a barred entrance and small window. I scooted back a bit so I could lean on the cool stone wall. A dry laugh escaped my throat as I went over the events that had recently occurred. How does this even happen to a person? Where the hell am I? Something wet dripped down my cheek. …well don't cry stupid! Be strong. Don't get scared. This is probably a big prank. Ahaha… nothing like this really happens to people. This only happens in movies and stories. But then again… a lot of stuff has happened recently that wouldn't happen to normal people...What's going to happen to us? I put my face in my hands and gave a sniffle before pulling back.

"Ew… my hands…" Looking down, I realized the rest of me wasn't very clean either. Instantly I stood up and tried to dust myself off, suddenly paranoid of what sort of germs were on me. Unable to stop thinking about my cleanliness, I rushed over to the bars and started to shake them (which didn't have much of an effect), talking loudly and hysterically. "Hey! Kidnappers or anyone! I need to wash my hands! I-I'm really dirty right now and I just need to be clean! H-hello?"

There was no sound but the occasional voices that came from the window. Oh yeah… there's a window. I was beginning to feel very cramped, so I thought looking out the window could help.

"Wh-what?"

We were in some sort of tall tower, nestled in the center (I presumed) of a seemingly large desert village. Unable to see quite as clearly as I would have liked, I could only observe small, robe-covered blobs making their way through the streets. Am I… in Egypt? Teleportation? What language do they speak anyway? Huh… guess that isn't too important at the moment…I wonder how I get out of here. God I'm not sure where my mind is right now. Whether I'm sad… or scared… or what.

"Here's the other prisoner, Lord Kazekage." Huh? I turned around in my spot to come eye to eye with a guy in weird robes and a triangular hat. Do Egyptians have triangular hats? I can't remember! These are important questions! Oooh. He has pretty eyes. Once I finally realized what I was doing, I blushed and straightened up, and aimed my vision anywhere away from him. The other man besides Mr. Pretty Eyes began to speak again.

"As I said, they were both found a few miles outside the village limits. And… they don't seem to be ninjas. Either that or they're only genin. I can't sense their chakra and they didn't notice our presence at all." The red head nodded, a pale forefinger tapping his chin thoughtfully.

"We'll interrogate them separately. Bring the blonde one to my office first. If they refuse to reveal any information, we'll keep them locked up until further notice." And with that Mr. Triangle Head exited the hallway, leaving me alone with the other dude. Well… shit.

Vash's POV

I sighed in annoyance as I fiddled with my hair, combing the bottom half through my fingers. Without glasses, I was only able to clearly see things that were directly in front of my face. Of course the poor lenses had practically disintegrated after I had removed them from my face. How inconvenient. How am I supposed to find Nicky now? A growl escaped my lips while my hands clenched into fists. The longer I sit here doing nothing the more frustrating this fucking shit becomes! But… I'm kind of useless at the moment.

"Hey hey! Ow! Ease up on the grip there, it's not like I'm going to just jump out of this tower to escape!" Hey that sounds like Nicky. From my position on the ground, I crawled my way over to the bars of the cell, gripping onto the cold iron bars as two figures walked past. I could barely make out the forms, but I knew one had to be Nicky.

"Nicky!"

"Vash! Are you okay?"

"I'm fine! What's going on?"

"They're going to interrogate us! But don't worry! I got this!" Oh god. What does that mean? I stood up, leaning closer towards her voice, and was surprised that the guard, or whoever was holding her, hadn't stopped our conversation yet.

"Nicky, don't do something stupid!"

"It's okay Vash! It'll all be okay!" Her voice slowly drifted away farther down the hall until I heard a door creak open and shut shortly after. God damnit Nicky. You better be in your right mind right now. Guess I should think up a good explanation just in case…

Nicky's POV

The whole walk to my destination, I thought about all the things I was missing back in my world (my family, the guys, Konan, Rin) and I decided something. You know what? I've had a bunch of random crap happen in the past couple months. I harbored criminals, evaded near death on several occasions, ran from zombies, and faced several uncomfortable situations that I thought I'd never recover from, and yet I've come out okay from all of those! And it's been awesome! So by god, I'll come out of this alive. I'm sure of it! I'm a new Nicky now! And I've got this handled.

I was feeling so confident, that as I passed Vash's cell I told her not to worry. Me! Usually it was the other way around. But not this time!

At the end of the hallway, we turned into a room with a double door, where I was promptly released, the doors shut tight behind me, leaving me alone with Pretty Eyes. At first all I could do was look around at his tidy looking office and the large windows that overlooked the town, though a light cough brought my attention back to him and I remained frozen in my spot. Come on Nicky! He's just a kid too. Probably even younger than you! You got this! Yeah you're right! 'Course I am.

"Take a seat," he offered, motioning to one of the chairs that sat before his desk. I awkwardly walked over there before slumping into one of the chairs. This whole confidence act was not working out too well. At least he's nicer than Orangey… aww I kinda miss him. And the rest of them. Boo now I'm all sad-ish again.

"-are you even listening?" I bolted up straight in my seat and looked around the room a bit before gazing back at him with a nervous smile.

"Eh heh. Sorry. I'm just… I dunno. So uh… should I just tell you what happened?" He clasped his hands together and placed them on the desk in front of him, his face still holding that blank stare.

"That is why you're here, isn't it?"

"Hahaha… that's right! It sure is… anyway so basically…" Think Nicky! Pretty sure the Akatsuki were not friends with most of the people in this show so… best not to mention them at all. Here goes nothin'. "So Vash and I were at Rin's house because I was supposed to be babysitting her, and we decided to play hide and seek and then… then… we went and hid in this closet and knocked over this vase thingy, which was completely Vash's fault… anyways! We were hiding there… and then we woke up in the middle of the desert! And then we got kidnapped by you guys and now we're here!" By the time I was finished with my epic tale, I noticed he now had a hand massaging his temple. That reminds me of the look Itachi and Pein gave me when trying to train me… damnit. I didn't realize how much I enjoyed their company until I'm not with them anymore! Stupid. Stupid stupid stupid.

"So you expect me to believe that you just happened to appear right outside my village with no recollection of how you got there and no chakra signature whatsoever? Do you realize that every living thing in this world has some form of chakra? Yet neither of you have one. How can that be possible?"

"…oh uh… am I supposed to know the answer to that? Uh… I'm not dead I mean. But I don't think I'm from this world. I don't even know what chakra is! I don't even know where we are, or who you are or why we were captured in the first place! I think you owe us answers too, buddy." I almost covered my mouth after I said that, but I decided to stand strong with my sentence. Seriously, who goes and kidnaps random people anyway? And why is this kid the one to do it? What makes him so important? I thought I made a good point so I decided to bring it up. "And how come you have the right to kidnap us anyways? What makes you so important? I'm pretty sure you're younger than me! You should respect your elders!"

The boy said nothing, when suddenly the doors opened from behind me. I turned around to see two guards walking my way.

"Hey wait a second, I'm not a bad person! I mean I think bad thoughts sometimes about killing people, but I think that's pretty normal! And I'm harmless! When I go to the gym I have to use the lightest weights possible! Seriously!" Ignoring my rant, the guards lifted me up by the arms and escorted me out, but not before I heard the boy speak.

"We'll continue this later once you've had some time to think. If you are still not willing to cooperate, we will be forced to hold you for as long as we deem necessary to determine what risk you present to this village."

"Wait but-!" Slam! Before I had realized, I was being led back to my cell. So much for "handling it". Way to go Nicky.

"Nicky! What happened?" I turned my head to the right as we walked passed Vash's block, but immediately avoided her gaze in shame.

"Sorry Vash. I guess it's up to you now, but don't worry, I believe in you!"

Vash's POV

Sigh. How did I know that was going to happen? There was a light creak to my left and I looked over just in time to see the same two guards who took Nicky standing before me.

"Come on then. It's your turn," one of them mumbled. I hoisted myself up from the floor and attempted to brush the dirt off my pants. The guards quickly gripped my forearms, leading me to my most certain doom. Well I guess my life could have ended in a worse way. But wait a second… I can't just give up and let those hoodlums trash our house at home! We did all this for them after all, and I'm not about to let us get sacrificed before we've seen a reward for our deeds.

"Well I certainly hope you have a better story for me than your… interesting friend had." My eyes flickered up to see a blob of colors, the most visible being red.

"Yes, she isn't very good at this sort of thing."

"Does that mean you are then?"

"No, but I do have a proposition for you." There was silence for a moment. A subtle tapping of fingers on wood could be heard.

"Very well. Let's hear it."

Meanwhile…

As soon as Zetsu had alerted the group of his discovery, they were quick to act, racing down the stairs to the front of the closet the two girls had been hiding in. Rin grabbed Konan's cloak towards her tiny frame as they stood before the door. At some point the whole group had changed their clothing, thinking that it would be better off to be prepared in case things took a turn for the worst.

"Are you sure it's in here, Zetsu?" Pein wondered to the plant man.

"Of course," he scoffed, "the portal is at the end of this closet." The group stood silently for a moment, staring at the door.

"Well what the fuck area we doing standing around here then? Let's get the fuck out of here. I'm ready to do some proper sacrificing!" Hidan yelled from the back of the crowd, roughly pushing his way towards the door when a voice stopped him.

"But… what about Nicky and Vash…?" A couple of the members looked back to Rin who had a few tears rolling down her cheeks, still holding tightly to Konan's cloak. Deidara frowned slightly.

"If they aren't here… then where could they be, hm?" Sasori glanced to the blonde on his right before answering.

"Well if not here, then who knows where in this world or ours they could be."

"And if that's the case," Kisame continued, "then… there isn't much we can do." Rin sniffled a bit.

"And if they're in your world, will you save them?" More silence.

"Yeah. We'll save them," Itachi said quietly. The rest (those who showed emotion at least) looked stunned at his input. Tobi clapped his hands a few times in the air.

"Tobi will save girlies too since blonde girly saved Tobi!"

"I still owe that short one money… I don't like having a debt," added Kakuzu in a reluctant tone.

"It was pretty nice to have them take care of us," Kisame mused.

"And they were quite entertaining," Sasori mumbled. Nodding beside him, Deidara grinned.

"Especially to mess with, yeah."

Fed up, Pein stood before the mass with an annoyed look in his eyes. "No. They are no longer our responsibility. It's out of our hands now. We need to focus on collecting the tailed beasts, not finding some brats." Konan sent an unnoticeable glare in his direction before stepping forward.

"It is still the least we could do after getting them kicked out of their only home, among other things." After a few moments, the leader finally sighed.

"Fine, but as soon as they're safe, we get back to our own plans." Rin gave a faint smile, opening the closet door for them.

"Be safe then… all of you."

One by one they passed by her into the now-visible portal, though she wouldn't let Itachi leave without a hug goodbye.

"Don't forget to be a gentleman." He placed a hand on her head.

"Hn." He then made his leave as the last of them, disappearing into the blinding light. And Rin wasn't sure why, but after they had left, the portal collapsed in on itself, leaving an ordinary closet behind.

"It's gone… does that mean they'll be able to come back?"

Foosha: So if any of you are still left... please review and let me know you're alive :D I miss you all!