Everything inside of him was in turmoil. He lusted over Blair that was no doubt about that and if he would be honest with himself he would admit that he always had done so. When he heard the news about her upcoming marriage to Chuck, all those years ago, his heart broke. That had been the moment that his last hope for reconciliation had left him, and yet again, at that time he had been passed hurt to even attempt to make a move. He had smiled and pretend that he didn't care, he even helped organize the ceremony just to have his heart shatter at every word pronounced, every look that she would give Chuck and the consuming thought that that night Chuck would lie down with Blair as her husband. He felt like running, he felt suffocated and yet there was no place to run to and no gulf of breath that would suffice.

He had settled for second best and he had learned how to love Serena all over again, but in Dan's heart the show down between the two women had only one fixed winner. After everything that she had done, how could he possibly love her this much? She had left him without a word; discarded him without even bothering to hear an explanation; she married Chuck and she had his child and nevertheless, he had wanted her all this time. After their last encounter his body was aching for her touch and not even his beautiful wife had managed to get his mind off of her brunette friend. Serena had seduced him that night after the welcome dinner for Chuck, and as a healthy man he had corresponded to her stimuli but needless to say that he had a totally different person in mind.

This burning desire combined with all the prejudices that he had against her were driving off the edge. He wanted to kiss her and he wanted to never talk to her again; he wanted to touch her and he wanted to never see her again; he wanted to be inside of her and he wanted to forget that she existed. If there was an award for dysfunction it would be his.

He was growing frustrated with himself and it didn't matter what he could not disconnected from his own mind. In one of those moments of frustration he grabbed his jacket and he left his office. He needed to go back to his roots. He headed to the loft.

After his father had re-married he had moved into a modest apartment and left the loft to Dan. Now that was his shrine for solitude, the place he would go to clear his head most likely when he was facing a creative block. Needless to say that he was facing no creative block, and even though that place brought him so many memories of her he still felt like the place where he would like to be. Serena knew that whenever he was there it was for him not to be disturbed and she was very respectful with that, so in order to avoid any unnecessary worries on her behalf he texted her on his way saying that he would stay there tonight. With that he muted his phone, not wanting to turn it off completely and he proceeded his way.

His lips.

His taste.

His hands.

His touch.

Her heart grew warm at the thought of him and at the same time she would feel a cold wave on her stomach that screamed how wrong all of this was. Blair thought of him more than what would be considered healthy, she would drift her train of thought to him in her office and when she would return from her reverie she would find a teenager smile on her face, as if she had just discovered love for the first time. Thinking of him made her feel safe; made her feel complete and extremely warm. All those years back she had been scared of him…scared of his feelings for her and her growing feelings for him too; he had been Serena's before he had been hers and if there was something that Blair could not stand would be to lose to Serena one more time, especially someone as important as Dan. Chuck had been hers and hers alone, there was no blonde bombshell threat to menace what little stability she had; with Chuck she would not have her heart being crushed over the thought that he would always want Serena instead of her…it was more safe in that sense. And yet again, she had never felt so safe with anyone like she had with Dan; she knew that he would be always by her side no matter what but there was always this little poisonous voice in the back of her mind reminding her how in love he had been with Serena, making her grow sick and afraid. She had to run from that, the fear had become too overwhelming as her feelings grew stronger for him. If she would love him too much and he changed his mind over Serena…she wouldn't be able to take it; she could have had bet on them but she placed her bet in a safer place. Chuck loved her and in pure honesty she loved him too, she was just not in love with him. There would be no Serena in Chuck's mind to create any instability in their relationship so, the day that Dan told her he loved her was the day she knew that this had to end. She was in love with him, how couldn't she be? But the fear and all of her past failed relationships made her so scared of failing with him too that she knew she had to run…if he would break her heart she wouldn't make it, it would be too much. The sex tape that was released short after their break-up was enough for her to start resenting him and eventually hate him – he had told her he loved her and slept with Serena on the same week.

But there she was all these years later…he had married Serena because she was the love of his life as she always knew; she had married Chuck and she had been content but never fully happy…and Dan had stormed back into her life and now she had something to look forwards to. His kiss, his touch – all about him was burning her with desire and passion, a true sleeping giant that had been suddenly awake. However this time they could not act on impulses. They were both married and Blair, truly cared dearly for both her husband and her best friend. How could she even think of Dan any other way than her best friend's husband? How could she see him as a man and lust over him so irrationally? She had been fighting the urge to call him since it all happened. She just wanted to hear his voice, and just that little desire made her inside twirl, she just wanted to look into his eyes and let her fingers sink on his hair – she had to stop this, she would go crazy if she continued to think of him.

She looked outside to see that it was already dark, without thinking twice she grabbed her things and headed out of her office.

Dan just sat on his loft trying to write something that had nothing to do with Blair, but failing miserably at each attempt.

She was his every thought and this desire was eating him up inside. He was in physical pain for not being able to be with her. His heart felt always heavy, his stomach was always cold…nothing had been right for a long time, but he had to taste her again to remember how much he needed her, how much he loved her still.

There was no need to cover it up with hate anymore; it would just be a lie that he no longer believed. He wanted the woman that he could not have. He loved a woman that as a girl broke his heart beyond repair. He loved Blair and it had to stop; it was not fair to Serena. She had been a good friend and a good wife to him, he loved her too but he loved Blair more.

He was growing tired and frustrated when his phone vibrated next to him. His heart stopped when he saw the caller ID: Blair. Why would she call him so late at night? Noticing that he had been staring at the screen and afraid she would hang up he picked up the phone.

"Blair?"

"…"

"Blair? Are you there?" He could hear some noise in the background but he was not sure what it was exactly. After another moment of silence from her side he asked one more time, "Blair? Is that you? Are you ok?"

"Oh…Humphrey…I'm drunk!" and indeed she was. Her voice was dragged in laziness and he knew she had had it good.

"I can hear that!"

"Don't be…err….con-con-condescending with me…can you…will you pick me up? I don't want to go home…"

"Alright…Blair? I need you to give the phone to the bartender, can you do that?" he heard some more noises on the background until he heard another male's voice. "Hello Sir, I want to pick my friend up but I don't think she can give me the clear address. Can you please text this number with the address and the name of the establishment? Oh! And please don't let her leave with anyone else besides Daniel Humphrey."

"Sure!" The bartender said on the other side.

"Thank you very much!" Dan said and hung up the phone.

He grabbed his things and called a taxi while he waited for the text message. Somehow he felt like it all was taking for forever as he grew more and more impatient to see and take care of her.

He finally arrived at the place and asked the driver to wait, while he entered and grabbed Blair. She was by the counter, her hands supporting her head and a straw in her mouth. He hoped that was water. He spotted the bartender and tipped him for his services before he touched her lightly. She immediately turned her attention to him and in her drunken haze she formed a smile at the sight of him.

"Dan!" she exclaimed with the sweetest voice he had ever heard coming out of her.

"Hey drunkie!" He said jokingly as he passed one of her arms around his neck. She hit him lightly with her free hand leaving it on his chest without taking her eyes out of it. "Blair…"Dan called for her calmly, somehow scared and pleased by their proximity. She looked confusedly at him and without a warning she kissed him on the lips.

The kiss was quick and without tongue, but it was intimate nevertheless.

"Let me take you home…" Dan said softly.

"No…take me somewhere else, but don't take me home." Blair said with a hint of despair on his voice. He could smell the alcohol in her, but he wouldn't ask for the reasons that had her drinking.

"Alright then, I will take care of you."

"Oh my God….Serena!" Blair let out as a sudden realization hit her.

"Don't worry; I was staying at the loft anyways."

Blair gave him a small smile and entered the taxi with his assistance.

The taxi ride to the loft was short, but it had been long enough for Blair to fall into a deep drunken sleep. When the driver pulled by the entrance, Dan paid and dragged Blair out of the taxi gently. Initially she felt like a dead weight to him, but as she regained some sort of sleeping conscience, her body stopped feeling so heavy and she nestled her head on his chest. She was still sound asleep when they entered the loft, and not wanting to wake her up Dan carried her to his old bedroom and lied her on his bed. He sat a small water station by her bedside in case she would wake up thirsty.

Mesmerized by the sight of her, he sat for a few minutes on the side of the bed. First he only looked at her, memorizing every trait of her sleeping and feeling his heart grow warm with love. At that moment he was not lusting over her, he was just in love with the woman that slept so peacefully in front of him. Gently he caressed her hair and, not sure if he would be able to be in her presence much longer without any physical contact, he simply placed a soft good night kiss on her lips and left the room with a content, and drunk, sleeping Blair.

He sat in front of his computer once again, but this time he did not even bothered in trying to keep any trait of Blair out of his narrative. Eventually he dozed off to sleep, only to also have his dreams filled with the brunette.

The smell of freshly brewed coffee woke her up from her drunken sleep. Her head was killing her and she still had that feeling of lack of balance. She could taste a minibar on her mouth and it disgusted her. She took in her surroundings only to realize that she was in a familiar place, however it was not home. Had she been a little more sober she would have recognized it immediately, but since that was not her state she could only have that feeling of knowing something without being able to name it. As she looked around she spotted her bag. She hoped she had something there that would take that morning/drunk breath away and she could have not been more thankful when she grabbed a pack of gum. The fresh mint flavour made her feel nauseated, but she regained composure and kept on looking around.

Cedric?

The little old toy was all she needed to know where she was. The question now was how did she got there and was it Dan the responsible for the enticing aroma that filled the room?

Her heart started to beat faster and faster as she tried to remember last night, but to no avail. Had she called him? Had she told him that she loved him? Had she cried and begged for his forgiveness? Had they kissed? Had they slept together? At that last question she both hoped for a negative and a positive reply, since she would love for that to happen but she would hate not remembering it.

She felt like a nervous child about to enter the headmaster's office. She paced in the room trying to gather herself before she exited the room and faced Dan. All the fears of what she could have had possibly done or said the night before forbid her to step outside the safety of that room. And yet again…who said it was Dan the one on the other side? She could have called Serena and to avoid any indiscretions Serena might have brought her there.

With a little bit more of relieve but still with an undeniable doubt in her heart she exit the room.

The brightness of the place made her squeeze her eyes shut and the aroma was just too overwhelming.

"Oh you are up! Good morning…"a very male, known voice said cheerfully.

"Good morning!" Blair managed to say but her voice sounded like the one of an old lady that had smoked her entire life. She also managed to open her eyes just to find his figure by the kitchen counter.

Since he had married to Serena and became this big author/upper east sider this had to be the first time she saw him as old Brooklyn Dan again. His hair was messy and he was wearing one of his trademark plaid shirts. She felt her breath escaping her and her heart raced one more time that morning. Somehow in the middle of that loft she felt like time hadn't passed, like she had never done the biggest mistake of her life and letting him go, like they were just Dan and Blair…her Dan. She felt so paralyzed by all these feelings that she just stood there looking at him.

His face grew serious and maybe even with some concern in his expression, but he was feeling exactly the same thing. In front of him stood the woman of his dreams, his one that got away – and she looked more beautiful than ever if that was even possible.

They just stood there in silence looking at the other until it became way too much to bear and the convention's barrier was broken, if the other would turn away it was a worth risk but at that point that was not even in the others mind as their next move was a simultaneous run to the other and a desperate clash of lips.

Their hands explored the others body and hair as the kiss grew hungrier and hungrier. At this point there was not a clear thought in each other's mind except for the tastes and feelings that this powerful kiss was giving them.

Their tongues fought desperately for an uncalled for domination; and their hands were just everywhere. Every time they would need to gather some air they would just stare into the others eyes, no words needed to express what they were both feeling and as soon as the need of air had been satisfied, they would return to their desperate kissing.

At some point Dan's hands grabbed her arse and in automatic move she jumped, placing her legs around his waist, he grabbed her more tightly and pressed her against the wall. The rough contact made her break their kiss and that was what Dan needed to proceed with kissing some other parts of her. He attacked her neck and collar bone and she could not help but to let soft moans escape from her lips, as she drowned on the feeling. Eventually the need of him against her lips grew stronger and stronger and she started to kiss his neck as well. Both just wanted to feel the most of the other in a clumsy and desperate way and at the same time so coordinated.

"I want you!" escaped from Blair's lips in a whisper as he kissed an especially delicate part of her neck.

He stopped what was doing to look her in the eyes. His eyes searched hers looking for any sign of doubt or regret regarding what they were doing or about to do, but there was nothing there – just pure desire and lust and dared he think, love? He would not wait to find out, and he fully kissed her once again wanting everything of her.

He lowered her down as he unzipped her dress, removing it gently from her shoulders as she set foot on the ground. She stood in front of him with just panties and a bra and he swore he had never seen anything like that. He kissed her again, and he felt her despair in feeling his skin on hers as she tried to unbutton his shirt. Once she was done she removed it from his body and took a moment to enjoy the view of his toned chest, her hands caressed his lower belly and her lips left trails on his shoulder. He attacked her neck with fervour as her fingers found the edge of his jeans.

After she unbuttoned his jeans, he pinned her once again against the wall. The closeness to his member had been enough to drive him of the edge. They kept on devouring each other as he tried to remove his pants and boxers.

"Oh God…I want you." He said in a husky voice.

Her hand moved to where he wanted it and for a second he felt like he couldn't breathe. She nibbled his ear as he stopped pressing her back against the wall and carried her to the kitchen counter. As soon as she sat on the edge of the counter he moved his fingers to the sides of her panties causing shivers down her spine. After that piece of cloth had been removed he moved closer to her, feeling the heat and wetness of her core on his member.

"O-Oh Dan…"

He needed nothing more. He was lost in her and he needed to be even more lost, inside of her. He positioned himself and entered her gently. Her nails tug on his back as the sensation overwhelmed her. She felt complete and the initial pleasure of the penetration was extremely intense. When he was fully inside of her he stopped to kiss her lips, and as their tongues danced together he started his ministrations.

He moved slowly at first enjoying every feeling of being inside of her. His mind was completely blank and he was blinded by lust, by her. She seemed to be delighted too, her eyes were closed and she would let some moans escape, some a little bit more intense than others, giving him the insurance that he was doing it right.

Making love to her was a second nature to him, he remembered every spot that would trigger her and he played his cards well.

Blair was ecstatic. He moved so smoothly and with each trust she felt her tension build up. She enjoyed his slow and careful movements for a while until her upcoming orgasm required a little more action.

"Please…" she whispered on his ear with a velvety voice, "…ha-harder!"

That was all he needed. He started to move more frantically inside of her. Sweat covered both their bodies, and Dan too felt his release coming closer.

"B-Blair…I…"

She replied with a moan, and somewhere in the middle of it, it shaped into Dan's name. He felt her tighten around him and her nails dug deeper on his back. The entire scene drove him off the edge, she was screaming his name, her inner walls wrapping around his member as she rode her orgasm and her nails hurting him in a pleasurably way. He too lost it to his orgasm as he shot his load inside of her with her name on his lips in the sexiest husky voice she had ever heard.

Neither could move, neither had a coherent thought on their minds. He rested his head on her shoulder and her heart grew warm by the gentle gesture. Their bodies were covered in sweat and they were exhausted from the hectic moment they had just shared.

"I'm sorry…" Dan let out in a breath and her heart sank. How could he regret it? How could he form these words at a moment like this? Why was he rejecting her like that? And why wasn't he saying anything else, or moving away from her? "…I'm sorry I didn't take my time to bring you to the bed." He said, still in a husky voice and he pressed some kisses over her shoulder. "I wanted to make love to you…and we ended up having sex."

"And it was great!" She said kissing the top of his head, relieved that he was just being his normal gentleman self and not a bastard that would tell a girl he had regrets of having sex with her right after they were done. "Besides…we can give it another try." She said while biting her lower lip.

He looked at her like he had done before. His eyes glued on hers looking for something that neither knew exactly what it was. Without any notice he kissed her fully on the lips but this time it was not a hungry and desperate kiss, it was passionate, it was calm and tender…it was perfect. Without breaking the kiss he lifted her and carried her to his bedroom.

Once had not been enough to satisfy the years of desire that they had both pilled over the other, but this time he would take his time to fully enjoy and please her; to love her.

A/n: I'm sorry for the delay with the update. This chapter was very hard to write because I don't feel all that comfortable with sex scenes to be honest, but I hope I managed to live up to expectations.

I would also like to take the chance, to thank you all for reading and for the wonderful reviews you have been posting. It is truly rewarding to see that you are enjoying reading it.

Xoxo

-patricia