Eridan sat on the chair staring at Sollux. He couldn't believe that he'd had the audacity to hit him! No one punches an Ampora man! At least no one that doesn't want to come away with a death warrant on their heads.

But then he thought about what he'd said and frowned. He'd been a complete and utter ass. He pulled his journal out of his bag and started writing again. This time he wrote about a power fantasy: Being an all powerful pirate and treasure hunter, like the man that had made the Ampora fortune so many generations ago. He really did wish that he could do something like that. It was actually the whole reason that he and Vriska had started geo caching. Cronus used to take them after he'd gotten his license, but after he decided that he was too cool for them it'd had gotten harder.

He looked over his journal at Sollux. He had to admit that he was hot in a geeky way. Though he couldn't really be sure with those stupid glasses on his face. He went back to journaling for a while and then heard a door open. Eridan looked up expecting to see Karkat, but instead saw what looked like a juggalo junkie with vomit smeared across his face paint. He realized it was Gamzee. He hadn't seen him in years, but it was definitely him. Eridan frowned. He honestly didn't have anything against Gamzee, he used to hang out with him and Karkat when they were little, but ever since he'd started getting stoned he'd been weird. And now, from the track marks on his arms, it looked like he'd been hitting the harder stuff.

The juggalo sat next to Sollux. "Hey, mother fucker! Why you gotta be knocking my things all up and off my desk, bro?" Yes. Definitely Gamzee. Eridan didn't know anyone that spoke that way.

Sollux looked at him. "Your things were on my desk, GZ."

"They were? Oh fuck, man, I didn't think they were on your desk, bro! I'll do my best to keep my mother fucking things off your shit. Now if you'll excuse a mother fucker, I've gotta go meet some bros and get all up in some miraculous shit."

"Whatever, GZ, don't hurt yourself."

"Thanks, I'll do my best not to, bro!" He patted one large hand against Sollux's shoulder, the force knocking him forward and causing his sunglasses to fall off.

Eridan tried to see what he looked like without the sunglasses. He was surprised to realize that his eyes were mismatched, but he couldn't see what colors each eye was. The geek slipped his sunglasses back on as Gamzee rose from the couch. He looked over at Eridan and waved amicably, not a trace of recognition on his face as he walked back to his room.

Eridan cleared his throat. "So, Sol, you know Gamz?"

"Yeah. He's a tool though. Leaves his shit all over my room and when he's not stoned he's got more heroin than blood in his fucking veins." He stopped and looked at Eridan. "I really don't want to talk to you."

"Hey, I'm sorry about what I said your brother, earlier. It wasn't my place to say say anythin' an it was out a line."

Sollux cracked his neck and made a face. "You're right about that."

"A course I'm fuckin' right."

"And yet you're still an asshole."

"Yeah well at least I'm not a useless hipster piece of shit."

Eridan glared. "Oh fuck you, Sol!"

"For FUCK'S sake, ED! Stop calling me Sol!"

"Erectile dysfunction?"

"That's just how I give nicknames, shit breath."

"Well I'll stop callin' you Sol when you stop callin' me ED."

"I don't think so. I think I can live with being called sunny for the simple fact that ED bothers you so much." He frowned. "But I don't know, maybe I can't handle being called sunny. Oh for fuck's sake just fuck off. I want to be left alone."

Eridan shrugged. "Whatever, I was here to talk to you about cash so if you're wantin' me to leave, then I guess I'll just go take Kar to lunch an leave you to wallow in self-pity."

Sollux raised his eyebrows. "Oh did I here the possibility of free food?"

"Not for you. Or at least not anymore."

"Then don't fuck off. I want food. Free food to be exact."

Eridan rolled his eyes pointedly behind his glasses. "I guess you can come, Sol." He smirked. "But only if you show me your eyes. I caught a glimpse of 'em while you had your glasses off an I couldn't figure out what color they are."

Sollux shrugged and took them off. "There, happy?"

"Oh I thought they weren't the same color, but I didn't see what they were right away."

"Grey and hazel." He put the glasses back on.

"Why do you even keep those on?"

Sollux laughed. "My eyes are super sensitive. Now take me to free food. I haven't eaten in like three days."

"I can tell; you look like you're skin an bone."

"Fuck you, I'm poor. Unlike some of us I haven't been able to get decent meals since I started college because mommy and daddy don't buy me everything."

Eridan's smirk returned. "How sweet, you still call your parents mommy and daddy. You want me to go get you some Cheerios for your little baby hands?"

Sollux growled. "I was just starting to appreciate you since you were offering free food, but now I really want to just bash your stupid fucking face in."

Eridan stood, holding onto his journal. "Well if you bash my fuckin' face in, then you won't be getting' any free food. Instead I'm pretty sure you'd just be gettin' a nice fat court case shoved down your more than willin' throat."

"You, sir, continue to be an ass."

"And you, Sol, continue to be a lispin' piece a shit."

"As long as you give me free food, I'm pretty much willing to be insulted. Nothing you can say about me could possibly be worse than the things I've called myself. So bring it, ED."

"Suck it, Sol. And while you're at it, I just want you to say a little tongue twister for me."

"What?"

"Just do it for me. I'll toss in an extra $50 for you."

"Hit me with your best shot, ED."

"Here goes: A selfish shellfish smelt a stale fish. If the stale fish was a smelt, then the selfish shellfish smelt a smelt."

Sollux frowned. "You just want me to lisp through that."

"Yeah that was kinda the point here, Sol. Now if you don't do it you don't get food or money."

"You dick."

"Yup."

Sollux stood up and cracked his back. "Okay. A selfish selfish smelt a stale fish. If the stale fish was a smelt, then the shellfish shellfish smelt a smelt." He made a disappointed noise. "I fucked that up."

"Yup."

"What's with the stupid fish tongue twister anyway?"

"Just something I like to do to fuck with people. It's even more fun with you because of that stupid lisp."

"The lisp is worth it for the sweet mods on my tongue."

"And what thweet modth would those be, Sol?"

Sollux took his glasses off again and winked. "Wouldn't you like to know, ED."

"Oh for fuck's sake, you're the one that mentioned the damn thing."

"Yeah and I can do some weird things with it, too. But that's a trick I only show to the people that I get frisky with."

"Are you teasin' me or hittin' on me here, Sol? Cause you are makin' it real hard to understand."

Sollux shrugged as he walked past to Karkat's room. "Who says I can't do both?" He turned in the door and smiled at him. "I was giving you shit, ED. There's pretty much no way I would ever hit on your sort of weird, gaunt face." He went into Karkat's room, leaving Eridan in the lounge.

He frowned. "I don't have a weird face." He rubbed his cheekbone with his free hand. Even though Sollux said he wasn't hitting on him, something about the way he'd said it made it sound like he was.

And that made him want to bite his stupid face.