Shout-outs: Jane Doe51, ngpcquevt, Nerwen Aldarion, DanahNYPD, and chymom

Disclaimer: Simple, I don't own anything.

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Chapter 3

"Be not deceived, bad company corrupts good morals." Proverbs 4:14, NIV_

Eight Years Later – Malibu, California

Kane still hated his half-brother.

But now it was for different reasons.

It wasn't because Patrick was being fawned over by crowds of silly people who thought he was something special. It wasn't even because he thought his father loved the younger boy more than him (Kane had wised up over the years and realized that Alex had just been using his little brother for his own personal gain.)

Now he hated him because he had become a façade, selling hope to the masses for a hefty price. Underneath the designer suits was fifteen-year-old boy who had cried over lying to a terminally ill girl. Underneath the silver tongue and the perfectly coiffed hair was the seventeen-year-old boy who had given him a coffee tin full of money when he had hit a rough patch in his life.

Even now, when they had rare visits, Patrick would pull out his Italian leather wallet and peel off a couple hundred dollar bills, making Kane swear not to spend it on drugs or women as he handed it over to him.

He hated him for the faker he'd become and for everything he had because he was a fraud. He hated him because Angela had wound up marrying him and they'd become the perfect little family with more stability than the three of them had had as children.

But he'd become good at hiding his hate, even from himself. Visualize had helped him do that.

He brushed the dark thoughts towards his brother away and knocked on Patrick's door twice. A few seconds later, Angela was ushering him inside.

"Patrick will be happy to see you," she said with no word about how she felt, but she didn't need to say anything. Kane could see the same old resentment towards him in her pretty hazel eyes. "He's in the nursery, putting Charlie down for her nap. Do you want something to eat or drink?"

"Water will be fine," he answered, offering her a smile as he followed her into the kitchen. "So, how are you Angela?"

"I'm still adjusting to having a kid. They said it would be easier when she reached a year old, but they were wrong. Other than that I'm fine though," she answered, getting a glass out from the cabinet and filling it to the brim with ice, water, and lemons. "What about you?"

"I'm fine," Kane answered, toying with his tie clip.

"That's good." Angela handed him his drink, there was a moment of awkward silence and then she cleared her throat. "Excuse me; I'm going to see what's taking Patrick so long. I'll be right back."

"Sure," he agreed, watching her as she left the kitchen, feeling the familiar pang of disappointment he usually got when he was around her. For some stupid reason, he wanted her to like him just a little bit.

"Here he is," Angela said a few seconds later as she led Patrick into the kitchen. "Paddy, why don't you take Kane out to the deck while I start dinner?"

"Of course darling," Patrick answered smiling at his brother. "Come on Kane, we have the most amazing view ever. I can't wait for you to see it! Don't say no, Angela can't stand it when I'm underfoot while she's in the kitchen."

"Okay," Kane said putting his glass down on the counter and standing up. "Then, take me to see this spectacular view of yours."

"So, how are you doing?" Patrick asked when they were situated on the deck chairs.

"I'm fine," Kane replied, hating that his brother's eyes were so filled with concern for him. "I almost have everything that I ever wanted. Stop worrying about me, Paddy. Okay? The sooner you do the better."

"I can't help worrying, I hate it that you're all alone and I have no idea what you're doing—"

"Frankly, it's none of your business!" Kane snapped. "You have your life and I have mine, we both agreed when you moved to California that's the way it was going to be."

"I know," Patrick said, looking slightly chastened. "But that doesn't ever stop me from worrying or caring about you."

Kane shook his head. "Why do you care so much about me anyways?"

Patrick shrugged a gesture that made him look younger than twenty-four. "Because you're my family and I love you."

Kane wanted to ask him why he loved him so much. He wanted to ask Patrick why he'd never picked up on his hatred towards him when he was so good at reading everybody else. But he couldn't do it, couldn't bring himself to ask the questions that he'd wanted to ask for so long. So, he changed the subject and told his brother how much he liked the ocean view and the new house.

He pretended to be happy for him while his brother just sat there and ate it all up with a disgusting look of happiness on his pretty features.

.

When the visit was finally over, Kane tried to get out of the house as quickly as possible. But Patrick insisted on asking if he needed anything.

He was set for money, but that still didn't stop him from answering that he could use one hundred dollars for car repairs. Patrick opened his wallet and handed it over to him without blinking an eyelash. This time he didn't even make him promise not to use it on drugs or prostitutes.

"Thanks," Kane said, pocketing the money and offering his brother a smile. "I'll see you the next time I have a free day."

Patrick nodded. "Okay. I love you Kane."

"Love you too," Kane muttered, but only because Angela was watching them. "See you later Angie. Thank you for dinner, it was really good."

"You're welcome," she answered, taking her fashion magazine and going into the living room. "I hope you have a safe drive back to Sacramento."

Kane couldn't deny the small sense of triumph he felt shoot through his body. It was the nicest thing that she had said to him in years, a small smile broke out on his face. "Goodnight," he said again. "I'll see you two later."

"Hopefully sooner than later," Patrick replied as he pulled him into a hug, always the one to drag out their goodbyes because he was never sure when their next meeting would be.

Kane patted him on the back awkwardly. "We'll see," he answered. "I really have to go now though."

"Okay," Patrick said, releasing him almost reluctantly. "You know, you could just spend the night. Sacramento is such a long drive away and it's getting late—"

"No!" Kane answered quickly, the need to get away intensified slightly. "I mean thank you, but I'll be fine."

So, Patrick let him go. He always let him go without pushing him too much, because that was just his style when it came to their relationship.

He wanted him to push, wanted him to fight him and maybe raise his voice. . . he wanted Patrick to hate him in return. He wanted the showman Patrick, the one who told lies and sold hope to needy, vulnerable women and men.

Instead, he got to see the Patrick Jane that nobody else in the world got to see. There weren't any façades or Armani suits when they were together. He was still a little boy following him around a field of tents and rides, begging him without any words to just love him in return, even if it's just a little bit.

Sickeningly enough, Kane hated him all the more for this.

The further he got away from Patrick's own personal paradise, the loathing he felt for his brother simmered more and more. For the first time in eight years, he didn't fight the bitter thoughts towards his brother. For the first time in eight years, he almost felt good because he wasn't trying to force himself to be charitable towards a person he despised.

Hatred was his disease and no matter what he did, he just couldn't cure himself of it.

.

A few days later, he decided that organized religion wasn't for him. He couldn't live by constant rules, regulations, and the need to be a better version of himself.

So, he quit.

Quitting was easy.

He was good at quitting.

He had quit both his families and Corrine without giving any of them (aside for Patrick) a second thought after he'd left them.

Burning one more bridge, leaving people behind had become second-nature to him. He'd stopped caring about anybody except himself a long time ago.

Of course when he left, he didn't have the church's blessing. The leader, Brett Stiles, sent him off with some nonsense about how one day he was sure that he'd see the light and return to them. The look on his face was sinister, the tone of his voice, creepy. It just gave him one more reason to be thankful to leave of organization and be on his own again.

.

He had been away from Visualize all of a month when he accidentally got involved with a new group of individuals. They were beautiful, supposed free-thinkers, who drew smiley faces with French fries and ketchup and traded romantic partners like they were candy. Their tastes included arsty coffee shops, poetry by William Blake, and Johann Sebastian Bach. Andgushed about their faceless leader like God Himself was living among them.

And even though they had a list of rules that everybody had to follow exactly to a "T" or something bad was bound to happen, Kane preferred them over Visualize. They didn't care that he hated his brother or that he thought about wronging him. In fact most of them had family problems of their own, and the ones that didn't were usually lying about their circumstances.

Everything was perfect again that when he heard whispers about vengeful murders it was easy to turn a deaf ear to it. He didn't have any evidence that it was the group of people he'd come to know were committing the crimes (even though the smiley faces on the victims' walls matched the ones he'd seen on plates).

And who was he to condemn somebody for doing the same things he had thought about doing for years? Maybe if he was given the chance to get rid of his brother, he would take it without a second thought. Besides all of that, he was almost afraid of what would happen to him if he went to the police with his suspicions.

One of the rules that they had was that you couldn't go to the police and tell on each other no matter what happened. It had seemed like a silly rule the first time he heard it. But the more time he spent with the little community of people, the rule had started to make more sense.

They were all keeping dark secrets and if any of them got out, it would probably just wreck the little world they were building together.

And Kane valued his life too much to lose it by selling secrets to the police. Especially since they wouldn't care about him or what he had to say once they found out about his track record with the police department in England. Besides, he considered the people he'd found a home with his family. For once in his life, he had something that he really didn't want to ruin.

So, he kept the rumors and secrets to himself.

And one day, he was asked to go and commit one of the nameless leader's killings for him. He was a little bit scared at first, but he concentrated on all the hatred he had harbored towards his brother over the years and murdering the teenage girl was so very easy. When it was over and he was showering, it almost scared him how easy it was to take somebody else's life.

What scared him even more was how easily he got away with it.

Nobody suspected him at all.

They were all looking for a serial killer.

A serial killer named Red John.

It wasn't until that moment Kane realized how much trouble he was really in and how hard it would be for him to get out of it.

TBC. . .

Author's Note II:

I realized that Visualize was a way BIGGER challenge than I was ready to take on. So, I decided to change it around. I hope the change wasn't too jarring for you. I'd love to hear what you thought about this chapter. We'll be getting into present day soon.

And a Happy Birthday to my FABULOUS father. He's such an amazing man. Godly, funny, caring, and a Jane/Lisbon fan. I was crying hysterically on Thursday because our dog was REALLY sick and he brought her to the vet for me. What more could a girl ask for?

Lots of love,

Holly, 4/20/2013_

BOSTON STRONG!