Shout-Outs: Jane Doe51, BookWorm4479, Tina, Nerwen Aldarion, and Marcia Santos

Rated: T

Author's Note:

Daddy wanted to make sure everybody knew that he was the inspiration behind "My Brother's Keeper". So, if I forgot to mention it at the beginning of this story, my dad is the idea behind this work of fiction. You can thank him accordingly. The quote is from the same song that inspired this chapter, "Colorblind" which is the Counting Crows song. I used the version covered by Natalie Walker because this chapter is from a female's POV.

Disclaimer:

The Mentalist belongs to Heller and Co. not me. Sorry to disappoint you.

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Lorelei Martins – Sacramento, California

One Week Later

"Pull me out from inside, I am folded, and unfolded, and unfolding. I am colorblind." Colorblind, Natalie Walker_

She watched from a distance with Agent Lisbon as her only companion while the Jane men and Daphne Reynolds buried her former lover in a simple ceremony. She barely registered what the priest was saying as he talked about redemption and forgiveness, all she could think about was how everything had changed in a blink of an eye.

One moment he had been making love to her, whispering affectionate words in her ear, and telling her how happy he was that they were starting a family together. A moment later, she had woken up to an empty bed with a letter instructing her on what to do if he didn't come back from his confrontation with Ray Haffner.

Before she knew what was happening, she had gotten a call from Bob Kirkland telling her that Ray and Kane had killed each other and that the group was disbanding before the police had any clue that they were connected to the serial killer. He offered to come and get her, to help her escape the country. The idea had been tempting, but in the end she had decided to stay put. She didn't care if one of her old 'friends' killed her to keep her quiet, or if she went to jail for the crimes she had committed. In the end, she decided she didn't want an ocean between her and Kane. She just wanted to be close to him for the rest of her life, even if it wasn't physically.

Lorelei sighed audibly as she rested her hand on her stomach without even thinking about it.

"It'll be okay," Lisbon whispered, squeezing her shoulder reassuringly as she adjusted the umbrella that was protecting them from the torrential downpour.

Lorelei wanted to believe the older woman's words more than anything, but no matter how hard she tried, she just couldn't do it. Because she knew the truth, it wasn't going to be okay. Kane was gone forever and she was going to jail. She would miss out on every milestone her child reached; some other woman would get the privilege of hearing mommy for the first time. And no matter what she did, no matter how long of a sentence she served, her sins would never be wiped clean.

It was as if Lisbon had sensed her thoughts, because she squeezed her shoulder again and offered her a comforting smile.

And then the funeral was over.

"Come on," Lisbon said, her voice still low as she led her closer to Kane's gravesite. "You can go and say goodbye one more time."

"Thank you," Lorelei replied, trying to stave off the tears that were threating to spill from her eyes. She hadn't cried over Kane's death yet, and she wasn't planning on doing it in a semi-public place.

Lisbon nodded then dashed between the raindrops to go and stand Patrick, leaving her in peace.

Lorelei watched for a moment as Patrick wrapped his arms around Lisbon and clung to her like his life depended on it. Then she turned her attention back to the open grave, wishing she could at least wrap her arms around herself to chase away the chill that had permanently settled into her bones.

She took a deep breath and bowed her head, praying to a God that she hadn't spoken to since she was a little girl. Then, she whispered a goodbye only loud enough for her to hear. When she was finished, she turned around and walked towards Patrick.

She had one more thing to do, one more wish of Kane's to fulfill.

"Agent Lisbon, could you reach into my left coat pocket and get the envelope there?" She asked as she stopped in front of them.

"Sure," Lisbon answered wearily, plucking the envelope from her pocket quickly.

"Thank you," Lorelei said, turning to look at Patrick. "Kane wrote me a letter before he went to see Ray. It was instructions on what to do if he didn't come back. One of the things that he asked me to do was pay you back every single cent that you ever loaned him."

Patrick took the envelope and opened it, stunned at the amount that he found waiting for him. "This is too much—"

"He wanted to pay you back with interest," Lorelei answered. "In the letter that he left me, he said a lot of the times that you offered him money he took it without really needing it. This is his restitution for stealing from you."

"But he never really stole from me," Patrick protested. "I gave it to him as a gift—"

"Jane, it was your brother's final wish," Lisbon told him quietly. "Don't begrudge a dead man."

Patrick thought for a moment and then nodded, stuffing the envelope away in his pocket.

Lorelei smiled to herself as she remembered the part in Kane's letter that had said Patrick wouldn't keep the money after he accepted it. By the end of the week somebody would have a new heart or a lung, or the cancer treatment that they needed. And nobody would know who they owed their second chance at life to.

It was a happy thought amid the gloomy ones of the day. And Lorelei hoped that she would be privileged enough to hold onto it for the rest of her life.

"You'll come and visit me, Patrick?" She asked after a moment.

"Sure," he answered, his eyes darting to her stomach. "If that's what you want."

"It is," Lorelei replied, turning to Lisbon. "I'm ready to go now, Agent."

"Okay," Lisbon agreed, glancing over at Patrick. "I'll come around your place with dinner later, Jane."

"I'm looking forward to it," he replied.

Lorelei quietly wished that they would have a happier ending than she and Kane had shared.

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Lorelei stared out the barred window at the dark, cloudy sky. She could barely breathe anymore, the day was coming to a close and she was beginning to realize that it was really over. There was no turning back or getting out of it.

This was the first day of the rest of her life.

She bowed her head and wept for everything she had lost, and for everything she was going to lose.

TBC. . .

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Author's Note II:

Short, I know but this story is finally winding down, and I had trouble capturing Lorelei in this chapter. Setting the mood was SO hard! 2/15 left and then it's onto more romantic things. I hope you'll stay tuned for the big finish, I already have the first sentence in chapter 14 written. I promise that you won't be disappointed.

Until next time!

Holly, 6/15/13_