I would like to thank Tiney1981 and buffsterangelicxws for their feedback. It is greatly appreciated! I hope you enjoy part 3! Keep the reviews coming!

J Lisa Anne

Chapter Four: Adolescence, Part 2

The Bon Fire

By October Buffy, Xander and Willow were among the most popular freshmen. This was mostly due to Xander's association with his brother. Cordelia was even beginning to hang around them. Of course she just thought that by becoming friends with the trio she had a better shot with Angel.

On Homecoming Weekend, Buffy sat at dinner with her family. This was yet another delightful dinner. She was not snippy and did not give any back talk to her mother or Rupert. They both questioned the change in Buffy. They could not figure out what made her change.

Buffy had changed. She was thankful for Rupert, especially after her talk with Hank almost three weeks before. Dawn had done a good job and had not told Joyce or Rupert about the phone call. Buffy went back into her not trusting any males, except for her friends Xander and Dan. They had proven to her that they were not like her father.

She had taken comfort in confiding in Xander about events in her life. He had told her that he didn't even remember his father. He told Buffy that his father had died when he was about one. Like Dawn, he had no memory of the man who helped bring him into the world. He could relate to Buffy in the since that he had father and that comforted her a little.

"So where is this bon fire?" Joyce asked her daughter as they finished dinner.

"It's on the beach. Is it all right if I stay out a little past my curfew? I'll bring your phone with me so you could call me at any given time." Buffy tried to bargain.

"How much later?" Rupert asked.

"Only 'til like eleven or eleven-thirty?" Buffy answered in an almost begging voice.

Joyce and Rupert had exchanged glances. "Angel is driving, right?" Rupert asked.

Buffy nodded. "Like always."

"Will there be drinking there?" Joyce asked.

"I don't know, I've never been to one of these things. I think there are teachers there and chaperoning and stuff."

"Buffy, if there is any drinking at all-" Rupert began to say but she interrupted him.

"Hey, I'm a freshman in high school, I don't want to do that stuff. My friends have no interest in doing that so-" this time she was interrupted.

"I know you would never do that, but if there are people drinking there, like the driver, do not hesitate to call us for a ride." Joyce said.

"Mom, Angel doesn't drink. He's an athlete, he can't do that stuff."

"Fine, but we just wanted to let you know that if you don't feel comfortable with Angel driving you for any reason at all, please don't hesitate to call us. Is that understood?" Rupert added as he finished his iced tea.

Before she could answer they heard a car horn. She finished her milk and stood up and was about to leave. "Yes. Can I please have the cell now?"

The bon fire was the biggest event of the school year. It took place the day after the football team's first home game. It was also a reason to celebrate since the team had won the game. Xander, Willow and Buffy had not excepted so many people to be at one function.

Buffy separated herself from her friends. She wanted to just be alone and walk along the beach. She wished she could make herself quit mopping about her whole episode with her father but it hurt more than words could every say.

"Hey, what are you doing? It's not safe to be this far away from the rest of the group. Sometimes there is a lot of crime done in this area," Angel explained as he walked with Buffy.

"Really, crime happens here? It's so pretty and peaceful."

"And dark. I think we ought to be walking back towards the other."

Buffy sighed. She didn't want to be with Angel, she wanted to be alone and continue walking for just a little while longer.

"If you want to be alone I could show you a place where I go sometimes, but of curse that is during the day."

"All right."

They began to walk towards an area that was on the beach but near the parking lot where there was light. Angel walked over and sat on one rock. "I like to come here and think sometimes, you know, just to be by myself."

Buffy sat next to him. A few minutes had past before she spoke up. "It is very peaceful here. I can see why you like coming here."

"Yea, it is. This is probably my favorite place to go to. No one knows I come here, well, except for you now."

"Don't worry, your secret is safe with me." She smiled.

After a few more moments of silence filled them, Angel spoke up. "Can I ask you something?"

"Sure, shoot."

"I have noticed the past few weeks that you seem, well, kind of angry at people for no reason and I was just kind of wondering why. This is a little different from how you acted in the beginning of the school year."

Buffy sighed. She didn't want to explain her entire life to Angel. She wanted to give him the briefest explanation. "Well, I'm mad at my father and I really don't like people because of him."

"So you hate people because of him?"

Buffy shook her head. "No, I just don't like most boys."

Angel smiled briefly. "Buffy, I don't understand you. You are probably the most popular girl in the ninth grade and you don't like people?"

Buffy looked at Angel and returned his smile. "Yea, that sounds kind of bazaar but it's the truth."

"What did he do that was so bad?"

Buffy turned away from Angel and watched the waves roll in and out under the light of the moon and the parking light. She then looked in the distance at her classmates having fun. "My dad left my mom, my sister and I when I was younger. He never got in touch with us for anything. I wanted him to love me and be part of my life so badly that a few weeks ago I went through my mother's things to find his phone number and address and I called him. He-," Buffy stopped. She could feel the tears reach her eyes. "He told me he didn't want anything to do with the children he didn't want."

Angel didn't know what to say. Part of him wanted to hug her and tell her it was all right, but another part didn't want to touch her because she wasn't his friend, she was his brother's friend. Before he had a chance to react, she continued. "My mother and I had talked about him a while back. She told me that she struggled with money stuffy. She said that we almost lost our house because of him. He hadn't given my mother any money for my sister and I until my mother threatened to take him to court. He has money, he is kind of wealthy."

"What does he do?"

"He's a lawyer. He became one so mom could do her art gallery stuff and so they wouldn't have to worry about money. When I called him, there was a child in the background calling for her daddy. My daddy! Why did he answer her? I have been crying for my daddy for almost seven years and he doesn't care. It's not fair." Buffy had lost it at the point.

Angel felt bad. He moved closer to Buffy and hugged her. He thought that no one had any right to do that to anyone, especially to someone who was like Buffy. He thought that she seemed like a nice person. He could relate to the unfairness of life in general.

Once she calmed down, Angel spoke up. "Can I tell you something?"

Buffy wiped her eyes and looked up. "What."

"My father left Xander and I when he was just a baby and I was little."

"He told me that."

Angel sighed. "Yea, but he doesn't know the whole story and why our father left us." Angel took a breath and then continued. "I remember a lot for being so young. I remember when he was born. I bought him a baseball glove with my father. I remember going to visit mom and Xander after he was born and we were all so happy, even Xand. I don't remember ever hearing him cry." Angel paused. He saw Buffy shivering and gave her his letterman jacket.

"Thank you."

"Your welcome." He took another breath and continued. "When I turned four I went to the doctor's for a check up, like kids do. The doctor's found something weird with my blood work. To make a long story short, I had cancer. My father couldn't handle it. One Sunday morning we woke up and he wasn't home. His car was still parked in the driveway but most of his clothes were gone. We had no idea where he went. Mom couldn't explain to use why he was gone. Luckily Mom money saved. Her family is wealthy so we never had to worry about that but," Angel stopped. He too had tears in his eyes. "I always thought it was my fault that he left. I thought that if I didn't have cancer he would still be home with me. He would have stuck around to teach Xander how to throw a ball. I blamed myself for so long. Now, I don't care what had happened, there is no excuse for abandonment. I know that he may blame me for his leaving but the truth is that he had a mind of his own and he chose his actions, not me."

Buffy had thought for a moment about what Angel had said. The part about no excuse for leaving your children made since to her. "That really sucks Angel, I'm sorry."

Angel pushed down closer to Buffy. 'Buffy, your missing the whole point of the story. It doesn't matter why he left, the point is it isn't your fault, don't beat yourself up over it, it's not worth it. You are lucky in so many other ways."

"Like how?" She replied smartly.

"Like having a family who cares about you and who loves you. I don't know a lot about you, but I have met your parents. Your mother and stepfather love you a lot. You have to quit concentrating on the past and begin to focus on the future. Life is too short to be so bitter."

Buffy began to stare out into the water again. Angel was right. The people around her loved her and told her that all the time.

Angel shifted the subject a little as he too gazed out into the water. "Please don't say anything to Xander. We don't talk about our father and he doesn't know-"

Buffy chimed in and interrupted Angel. "Don't worry, I wouldn't say anything."

"I think we should head back now. It's almost the end. Plus, it's almost eleven-thirty, I don't want to make your parents upset if you're late."

He stood up and climbed off the rocks. He took Buffy's hand and helped her off the too. By the time they reached the bon fire they moved on to a different conversation and laughed. Most of their friends had left. Xander and Willow were waiting near the car. Cordelia had asked them for a ride since her ride left without her.

"Hey, where were you guys?" Willow asked.

"Yea, we thought something had happened."

Buffy looked blankly. If there was one thing she just wasn't good at it was lying.

"You should have seen the beach. There were all these starfish and we were throwing them back into the water. I had never seen so many in my entire life!" Angel lied. He had an interest in marine life so the story was believable to Xander.

"That's my brother, always trying to save some poor and defenseless water creature." Xander said. "Do you mind giving Cordelia a ride? Her ride left without her."

"Sure, we can do that. It may be a little crammed thin the back though."

"That's all right, it beats walking home."

Everyone piled into Angel's two-door Saab. The car was a hand-me-down from his mother even though it was less than two years old.

After dropping Cordelia off, which Angel was less than thrilled about, he headed towards Buffy's house. It was the only thing that made since. Willow lived right next door to him and Xander.

As he drove he rushed to make sure she was home on time. He didn't want her to get into trouble if she was late. He had enjoyed talking to her that night and wanted her to know that she could count on him for anything.

Once he arrived at her home, Angel pulled into her driveway.

"Buffy it was nice talking to you about the starfish," he said almost hesitating. "Maybe we could do it again some time."

Buffy smiled as Xander spoke. "I think that is code for something. Wil, what do you suppose 'starfish' could be code for?"

Willow laughed. She had known Angel her entire life and he was like a brother to her. "I don't know Xander but I wonder." She said as she began to make kissing sounds.

"Hey, stop it. Angel did teach me a lot about 'starfish'. It was an interesting night. I'll see you Monday morning. Good night." Buffy said not commenting on Angel's offer to meet again. The cars backed out of the driveway and began to drive down the street. Buffy walked inside her house. She placed the cell phone on the coffee table and walked up the stairs.

She knocked on her mom and Rupert's door. She knew they would still be a wake.

"Come in," Rupert said.

"I just wanted to let you guys know I am all right and I am home and I'm going to bed."

"Did you have fun?" Rupert asked.

Buffy thought for a minute. Her talk with Angel took most of the night. "It was informative. It was kind of interesting. I'm going to go to bed now"

"Yes, of course. Good night Buffy." Rupert said

"Hey Buffy, where'd you get that jacket?" Joyce asked.

Buffy had completely forgotten that she was wearing Angel's coat. "It's Angel's. I got cold so he went to his car to get it. He doesn't wear it that much. Letterman jackets haven't been popular since the days of Grease." Buffy said referring to her new favorite movie.

"That was nice of him. Make sure you give it back. Good night honey," Joyce finally said.

Buffy smiled. "Good night."

She walked into her room and turned on the light. She took off the coat and put it on the chair next to her vanity. She got dressed for bed after washing her face and hands and brushing her teeth. She climbed into bed and went to bed. As she lay awake, she thought about Angel and Xander's father. She wondered if there was a whole club of men just abandoning their children and wives. She did feel better after talking to him. She knew first hand now she wasn't alone and that someone else knew how she felt.