Spiritual Misadventures
By: Evan McNeely
Disclaimer: I do not own anything but my ideas and myself, take them and die.
"Speech" Thoughts Emphasis
(My notes)
Chapter Eleven: After Much Deliberation.
"So Kame..." Vegeta started. "How is it that you were released? I mean, someone had to pop open the bottle thingy with Piccolo inside right?" Vegeta continued after Kame nodded. "So then, someone also had to have killed the original Piccolo and his hench-demons."
Kame nodded again. "That's right, a young boy named Goku defeated the demon I originated from."
"Goku? So everything is on course in this world after all..." Vegeta said mainly to himself as he stroked his chin.
"I suppose so." Kame replied.
"But how was the bottle opened? I destroyed the Red Ribbon army. Wasn't it them who opened the bottle, or was it that Emperor Pilaf... or was Pilaf from the Red Ribbon army... I'm getting all my facts mixed up..." Vegeta said, as he stared blankly into space.
Kame shrugged. "I don't know... but either way, things must be going as you expected seeing as myself and Popo are here."
"I suppose so... but the future is not so easy to predict now... countless things could have been altered in the slightest way making for a horrible outcome now!" exclaimed Vegeta.
Kame pondered for a moment before speaking. "But the general events will still happen... big things that couldn't be affected by the goings on of Earth." He said matter-of-factly.
"Again, I suppose so... but I'm only supposing here... I can't be sure until I actually encounter the event... like Freeza destroying Namek..." Vegeta said, as he began to pace not noticing Kame's suddenly pale appearance.
"Someone is going to destroy Namek!?" Kame exclaimed.
Vegeta nodded. "Yes... it's name is Freeza... It will insist that it's a male... but don't believe it..." Vegeta then leaned close to the Namekian. "Transvestite." He whispered in Kame's ear.
"Namek is going to be destroyed by a transvestite?" Kame said, bring his voice near a yell but not quite.
Vegeta just nodded again. "But Goku will destroy it... He'll need to go to Namek to find the dragonballs someone is going to tell him about... I forget who though... tricky memory... always fails when I need it most then when I'm sleeping or eating cereal I scream out what I forgot, spilling cereal everywhere!... But none the less... I think I might have to take a guiding role in this universe... with my knowledge of what should have happened I can adjust what is going to happen... course... Trunks is never going to be born.... but I'd be kinda pleased to make that happen... always had a soft spot for chicks with blue hair..." Vegeta said as he began to daydream of wooing Bulma and then coming to the realization that he had punched her out many years ago. "...Oh... I hope she forgets that..." He said to himself.
Kame's powerful hearing picked up Vegeta's conversation. "Hope she forgets what?" He asked, sounding worried.
"Well umm... I kinda punched out this girl I was supposed to impregnate to get a dragonradar off her without too much hassle... and umm... the child of my mad passionate love would eventually.... kinda warn us all of a great threat to the world... and aaaa..... play a crucial part in stopping the threat.... but hey I kicked Red Ribbon's ass... so no Dr.Gero!!!" Vegeta said doing his best impression of the Fonz.
Kame blink blinked. "It seems your knowledge of our world has not stopped you in the least from dooming us." Kame shook his head and closed his eyes, his old brow furrowing in thought. "None the less... as the guardian of this planet I charge you with the task of setting as much of our universe back into order so that events can play themselves out without further disruption." Kame then walked over to Vegeta. "As my charge you are to wear clothing much like my own." The old Namekian said, thrusting his hand out to Vegeta and producing a purple gi, shoulder pads, a billowing cape and a turban. As instantly as he produced them they were on Vegeta.
"H-how..." Vegeta stammered.
"I'll show you the technique. You can use it to take off or put on the cape and shoulder pads... which are weighted quite heavily. It will keep you on your toes and reveal you to those that know me as one of my charges... of course there is only one or two people who will question you about your uniform... One of them being my other half, Piccolo." Kame said, wincing at the name. "But none the less you should seek out Piccolo and ask him to train you in whatever meditation and combat techniques he knows... the meditation should allow you to sort things out and remember what you have forgotten, the combat techniques may or may not prove useful, depending on how active a role you wish to play in this world's history." Kame said as he began to demonstrate the technique to remove the cape and store it in some sort of pocket dimension.
Vegeta watched carefully and then paused. "But.. Um... don't you and Piccolo hate each other?"
Kame smiled faintly. "Yes.. In a manner of speaking we do hate each other... although I think hate is to strong a word for our feud... no one can truly hate himself... I do not hate Piccolo... I see him as a manifestation of my dark side, but I do not hate him. For without the dark there can be no light... or so I've discovered." Kame said sagely as he finished demonstrating the simple technique.
Vegeta shrugged and performed the technique without to much error and smiled when he was just wearing the purple gi. "I guess... oh well.. Where can I find the 'manifestation of your dark side'?" Vegeta asked, making quote marks in the air.
Kame smiled. "I'll leave that to you... you must find out everything in this world if you are to fix it to some semblance of the way it should be."
Vegeta shook his head. "You are a crotchety old man Kame... but I'll search out Piccolo and learn these techniques... well... I suppose that does it then... I'll be off." Vegeta said as he walked out of the palace leaving a ponderous Kame to his thoughts.
As Vegeta stepped outside he saw Shira sitting on the edge of the lookout, her feet dangling out over the edge. He smirked and walked up behind her. She turned and looked back at him as he approached. "How'd your meeting go?" She asked as she patted the floor just to her right.
Vegeta declined the invitation with a shake of his head. "Not bad... I'm in charge of fighting all the baddies that would threaten the universe..."
"Huh... sounds fun... can I join?" Shira asked.
"I dunno... I think there's a dress code." Vegeta said, motioning to his new clothes.
"I'd look dumb in purple... I'll just tag along unofficially." Shira said with a smile. "The purple looks nice."
Vegeta frowned and donned his cape, much to the surprise of Shira. "Well... let's get the hell outta here." He said, taking off from the side of the lookout and flying ahead of Shira.
"Where'd he pull that cape from?" Shira asked herself as she followed suit.
Slick grinned disturbingly as he set the recently acquired dragonballs down on his bed along with the other two. "Four of seven... then alls we gotta do is find the real keeper... Where's the next one at?" He wondered out loud as he pulled the dragonradar from his jacket pocket.
Greasy mimicked Slick's odd grin and leaned in close over his buddy's shoulder to get a better look at the LCD display of the radar. "Where is it?" Greasy asked as Slick shouldered him back to get some breathing room.
"Pretty far away by the looks of it." Slick said as he started to head outside.
Greasy followed along, keeping a respectful distance. "What direction?"
Slick just pointed in a random direction, knowing full well that neither of them knew which direction it would be. "That a way." He said as the pair began after the fifth dragonball.
Puar groaned as he staggered into Orange Star City. He had been following the tracks of two men on foot, one of them dripping some kind of greasy liquid. Originally Puar thought that it meant that he was following a pair of robots, but decided that he must just be following one robot and some other guy because the non grease dripping one had a strange path weaving as though drunk. The grease dripping one on the other hand had tracks that almost matched the other's perfectly, hinting at a robot or cyborg. At least, that's what the blue shape shifter suspected. He hadn't been able to confirm anything from Yamcha's death site nor the tracks, and he certainly hadn't seen either one of them. Puar moaned in frustration and fatigue as he entered the city limits and was forced to follow the track of grease alone as the dust of the desert became the cement of the city. He continued for an hour and then decided to rest for the night as it was getting dark and he was tired. Alone, he passed out amongst the trash cans in an alley behind a Chinese food restaurant.
End of Chapter
Author's Notes: (Back on track... inspiration is flowing like water... in like.. A river or something.... anywho... what I mean to say is I've been getting things done... I have actually finished a character sketch of the lovely couple (Shira and Vegeta, not Slick and Greasy) and will eventually get that scanned if my school has the apparatus... if not... um... you'll never see it... and if the school does have a scanner I'll be getting a website, or a deviant art account and either way I'll link to it on my profile page... just FYI... on that note... I'll gladly accept fan art... wink wink... nudge nudge... so that I can fill out an otherwise would be empty site.... which I will be making in the next short period of a couple days.... so yeah... that's all from me... Bye for now.)
Evan McNeely can be reached at and strongly requests that you add him on MSN if you already haven't as he is so very lonely.... oh and he posts his work on as well as on which... now that I mention it, is my first fanfic EVER!!! If you want to know what my writing was like before I became the writer I am now... check that out... or just... um... read the first three chapters of SM.... which I still need to fix.... stupid in between asterisks blanking out so no one can tell what I'm saying to King Kai as Lin Shong breaks his fist on my manly body.... so lonely.