Spiritual Misadventures
By: Evan McNeely
Disclaimer: I don't own anything except my own ideas... and sometimes I don't even own them... they own me...
lovely note + is replacing asterix cause asterix is on strike or something or not supported... hates the nasty hobbitses
Chapter Twelve: The Break is over
"YOU!" A raspy voiced called out in the darkness. "GIVE IT BACK!"
"What are you talking about?" A second voice queried. "Give what back?"
"You know... you stole it from me..." The voice said in a hollow tone.
"No... I actually don't know what you are talking about." The second voice responded sounding confused.
"Hmph! I guess it doesn't matter... It'll only be a short time before I have it back." The raspy voice said.
"WHAT WILL YOU HAVE BACK! YOU ARE REALLY STARTING TO PISS ME OFF!"
"My body..."
Vegeta woke up in a cold sweat. "Holy shit that was a vivid dream." He said to himself as he sat up. "I wonder who that second voice was?" He pondered to himself as he pulled himself out of the double sleeping bag he and Shira had bought before attempting to find Piccolo. He got up and walked to the lake that the pair had picked out as the first spot to check. +Yeah.. Like Piccolo would be at a lake... he always seemed more of a foresty, mountainy guy.+ He thought to himself as he began to wade into the lake. "I hope there aren't leeches in here."
Puar groaned as he woke up in a pile of cooling Lo Mein. He stretched out and assumed the form of Yamcha. +I should blend in better looking like a human.+ He thought to himself as he wiped the last bits of MSG laced food from his face. +I hope the trail is still relatively fresh.+ With that he headed out to the bustling city street in search of a trail of dried grease.
"We got another one Greasy!" Slick said as he held the 5 star dragonball over the badly bludgeoned head of the poor fool who happened to find that particular shiny rock.
"How many more do we gotta get?" Greasy asked his companion in all things platonic.
"Well this is our fifth one and there is seven..." Slick said pondering the mathematical equation.
"So four more?" Greasy asked.
"Yeah, something like that." Slick said as he patted his friend on the back and smeared some of their victim's blood on Greasy's leather jacket.
"Cool.. Where's the dragonbail radar pointing us now?" Greasy asked practically prying the device from Slick's back left pants pocket
Slick pointed to the north. "Thata way." And so the pair headed thata way in search of one of the seven crystal balls from the sky.
Vegeta surfaced face up in the lake. "This is the life!" He exclaimed to himself. "No worries, no problems and best of all, no clothes."
"I kinda like that no clothes thing too." A voice said from behind him.
Vegeta shrieked and desperately flailed about attempting to cover his naughty bits. "AHHHH! GET AWAY FROM MY NAKED SEXY BODY!"
Shira swam back slightly and snickered as Vegeta attempted to both cover himself and stay afloat in the lake. "Why are you covering yourself? I've seen it all before." She said with a hint of pride in her voice.
"Yeah... but not so... umm... wet! Yeah.. Yeah... wet... never this wet before... and I don't think we are ready for that step in our relationship. In fact, I might even suggest that you turn around and umm... not look at my wet nakedness." Vegeta said, attempting to cover for the girlish shriek and failing horribly.
Shira smirked and turned around. "Fine, but I have to add that the cold water is doing nothing for you... perhaps it's even cutting down on your appeal... I don't think I enjoy this wet nakedness quite as much as dry."
Vegeta looked down at what he was floundering to cover. "THAT'S NOT FAIR IT'S REALLY FREAKEN COLD IN HERE! YOU HAVE TO COMPENSATE!"
Shira began to swim to shore. "I CAN'T COMPENSATE FOR WHAT ISN'T THERE!" She hollered back with a laugh.
"DAMMIT!" Vegeta cursed to himself as he started to swim in as well.
"What a let down." Slick said as he impatiently swung his baseball bat around randomly. "Didn't even have to beat anyone up!"
Greasy smiled as he dodged Slick's bat. "Yeah... but think of all the money we'll save on bail..."
Then, from seemingly nowhere, the minds of both Slick and Greasy intersected on some sort of astro-physical plane of existence. "DRAGONBAIL!" They shouted, perfectly in sync with each other.
Slick looked at Greasy and Greasy looked at Slick. "GEFELTASTICK!" they yelled. "Weird." They said. "We have to stop doing this."
"Yeah." They said, continually in sync.
"What the hell is a gefeltastick?" They queried of each other. "Meh. Next bit of bail?" they asked each other.
"Last one." They said after a brief pause.
Slick stared down Greasy as they both reached for Slick's back pocket. Slick, as it was his pocket, reached the Dragonball radar first. Slick and Greasy frowned at each other. At that point they both reached up into the air to check the direction the wind was blowing and accidentally touched each other's fingers together.
A bright flash of light flared as the beings known as Slick and Greasy were forcibly compressed into one ultra being. The light slowly died down, revealing one bad mother. His black hair virtually dripping with grease, his black suit appearing so black it was blinding and most of all his chin so gigantic that small children ran in fear of being crushed. Finally in a booming voice the new being declared to all of the world. "I AM SLIASE... NO! GREICK!... that sounds dumb... I AM SLICK GREASE! YES! SLICK GREASE IS HERE TO PUMMEL AND PILLAGE YOUR BAIL OF DRAGONS! AND MY HANDY DEVICE SAYS! BUM BADA DUM!" Slick Grease checked the Dragonball radar swiftly and pointed swiftly and dramatically to the north. "THATA WAY!" With that Slick Grease began to hop up on to the rooftop using the walls as his method of transport and from the rooftop he began hopping towards the source of the blip.
Vegeta finished towelling off his hair and shuddered. "Wow... something feels very wrong."
Shira walked up behind him and slipped her arms around his waist. "What is it?"
Vegeta shrugged and rested his hands over hers. "Dunno. Just had like a gut wrench kinda feeling."
At the mention of gut wrench Shira quickly retreated a few steps. "You aren't going to puke or anything right?" She said, waving her hands in front of her to prevent anything from spilling from Vegeta's mouth to her currently half dressed body.
Vegeta smiled and made a retching sound as he approached her and aimed for her feet.
Shira shrieked and kicked off the ground and flew back a few feet. "DON'T EVEN THINK IT!" She bellowed as she brought her hands to her side and began gathering chi into her palms.
Vegeta looked up and smiled. "You're cute when you want to kill something." He said as he walked off and started to roll the sleeping bag up again.
Shira fired the ball of energy into the lake and landed nimbly next to Vegeta and held their backpack open for him. "You think so?" She said with a smirk.
Vegeta nodded as he stuffed the sleeping bag into the backpack. "Sure, when you have that determined look on your face your brow scrunches up and it makes your eyes look so cute and funny."
Shira winced for a second and then swiftly punched Vegeta into the center of the lake. "THAT'S NOT FUNNY! THAT'S THE LOOK I MAKE WHEN I'M GATHERING CHI! MY ENEMIES MUST FEAR THAT LOOK!" She screamed as Vegeta surfaced and spat out some water he had almost swallowed.
Vegeta laughed as he began to fly out of the water. "I'm not your enemy am I?" He asked with as good a puppy face as the Saiyan Prince's face could manage.
Shira huffed and turned away crossing her arms across her chest. "Not at the moment." She said, attempting to lace her words heavily with conversational venom.
Vegeta overacted a wince as he approached her and touched down a few feet away from her. "Well then why does it matter if I think it's cute when you do... this!" He said as he attempted poorly to mimic Shira's concentration face.
Shira practically roared as she swung a fist at Vegeta's face. He deftly blocked the attack and swept a foot at Shira's legs.
Shira hopped up and launched a quick chi ball which Vegeta dodged and responded to with a small volley of his own chi blasts.
Shira smirked and batted them away. Suddenly Vegeta appeared behind Shira, his hair glowing a bright yellow. Shira gasped as Vegeta landed a solid blow to her kidney which he followed up with a roundhouse kick, sending her deep into the pond. He then began to hover to the ground, his hair slowly returning to its' normal black.
Shira's head popped out from the surface of the water. "When did you get that fast?" She gasped as she swam to the shore.
Vegeta shrugged and waved his hand in front of himself instantly dressing himself in the purple gi and white shoulder pads given to him by Kami. "Dunno. It's just happening. I'm slowly getting faster." He giggled at his own crappy half joke and hefted the backpack onto his back. "Shall we be off?"
Shira shrugged and rubbed her side as thee pair lifted off and headed towards the biggest source of chi they could find that wasn't Kami.
End of Chapter
Author's Notes: (Well... that seems as good a place as any to end it for now. I appologize infinately for the uber slow updating but college is a first class bitch that I am finally rid of for now... though It puts me into the working force for the summer and potentially the next semester of school as well. Stupid costs and food needing... I hates it... I hates it all. Regardless shoot some feedback by me and um.. I'll try to update faster. Like soon...ish...ism... I appologize for the damn no spacing... my methods are not being supported as of late. neither is my thought bubble things half the time... cope for now and I'll reward you with better stuff at mordennight. cause hopefully Morden puts my stuff up.. sides.. you should give him some hits he helped me into this 'industry')
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