Chapter 5: The shadow in the dark (Part 1)

xxx Souichi xxx

"These bastards…" Clicking his tongue in irritation, Souichi selected the twenty new emails in his inbox and deleted them promptly. "How the hell did they even get hold of my personal email address anyway!"

Slamming the lid of his laptop, he took off his glasses, massaging the bridge of his nose. There went his mood to research on the herb that Prof. Fukushima was working on, and he had barely started! Damn those reporters. Straightening, Souichi looked around, breathing a small sigh of relief that Morinaga was not home at the moment. The man had gone out to buy groceries in full disguise mode, complete with sunglasses, facemask and cap. Souichi had thought that he looked even more conspicuous in the ridiculous outfit but had not complained. After all, even when they had chased those reporters away and refused all communication, those people were still not giving up on getting an exclusive interview with the 'gay couple that could get pregnant'.

"Shit…" The thought of those gossipmongers was enough to sour Souichi's mood, which was already quite black with all the discomforts as their baby grew in his womb. But the tenacity of the reporters was not the real reason why Souichi was really angered; news of their pregnancy was bound to incite boundless speculation, not least about the issue of homosexuality.

Proponents and opponents of the LGBT scene in Japan had taken the chance to open up an intensive debate about the topic and unluckily, the day that Souichi had chosen to watch the television had been the day when some asshole had gotten on a talk show to air his worthless views. Morinaga had given him a scare that day in the kitchenette, a stricken expression on his face as blood dripped from his cut finger. Souichi's own heart had nearly jumped out of his chest then.

The silly baka. Giving up completely on working, Souichi slowly made his way to the kitchenette to get a glass of water, belly bumping gently against the wooden counter as he stretched to get a glass from overhead. Morinaga had overheard the more controversial contents of the talk show and missed what the supporters of free love had said later. It was really ironic that Morinaga had reacted more violently to it than Souichi when he was supposedly the one who was anti- homos! Sipping at the clear water, he leaned against the counter, deep in thought.

It was true that he had harboured similar sentiments against gays in the past. And who could have blamed him, when an esteemed professor whom Souichi had trusted had suddenly jumped him in the lab? And yet, here he was, cohabiting with a man, eight months pregnant with said man's child, and proposing to Morinaga just two days ago! Frankly, any person other than his kouhai would have recognized that Souichi was way past the point where gender and socially- established boundaries could affect him!

Damnit, was he not doing enough already? Souichi set the glass down, cradling his laden womb as he sighed. "Baby, your papa is such a silly person; what should I do with him?" Just then, a small contraction shivered through him and he stopped any movement, breathing in and out evenly until he was sure it had passed. Good, that was just a Braxton- Hicks contraction. Souichi waited for a moment more before he moved away from the counter gingerly. Really, what with the upcoming birth and Morinaga's insecurities, he was fully occupied. He could only be grateful that Isogai was helping him to take care of Matsuda- san and Kanako.

The doorbell rang just as he stepped out of the kitchenette. Morinaga must have bought too many things and could not open the door by himself. Souichi made his way to the front door, a hand holding up his aching back. As a precaution, he glanced into the peephole first, expecting to see the thick mop of Morinaga's hair.

Instead of his lover however, there was an unfamiliar woman at the doorway, looking directly at Souichi as she pressed the doorbell again. Stepping away from the door in disgust, Souichi was about to leave the genkan when her voice piped up.

"Tatsumi Souichi- san, I know that you are in. Open the door, or I will do something that you and Morinaga- san would regret!"

The gall of this reporter! Incensed, Souichi had the impulse to wring open the door and punch her. But he had the baby and his family to think of, especially in these delicate circumstances. Damnit! "I'm going to call for security if you don't leave my house now. I don't care if you are a reporter or a newscaster or the Emperor of Japan!"

"If I tell you that I'm not a reporter but somebody who could cause considerable damage to Morinaga- san's career at S Pharmaceuticals, would you open the door then? I'm not kidding, Tatsumi- san."

Though it was clearly whispered at the door crack, Souichi heard every threatening word clearly. Spinning around so fast that he almost lost his balance, Souichi grabbed hold of the doorknob and twisted it. The door jerked against the metal chain roughly. "Who the hell are you?"

"Konbanwa, Tatsumi- san. I'm glad to meet your acquaintance. Won't you let me in?" The woman was older than she sounded, her lined face somewhat incongruous with the triumphant smile as she stared at Souichi.

"The hell I would! You haven't answered me, woman." The thought of Morinaga's bright prospects being darkened by this middle- aged obaasan was unbearable. Souichi's hand gripped the knob tightly as he glared at her. Why would a stranger know them, and Morinaga's workplace?

The woman smirked as if she could read Souichi's disturbed thoughts. "I'd be glad to enlighten you on any questions that you have obviously got on your mind, Tatsumi- san, but first, why don't you let me in? You should be more respectful of your elders, no?"

Damn her! When it was clear that she would not speak another word until he relented, Souichi slowly slid the door chain free, opening the door for the stranger to enter. Folding his arms, he did not invite her further and remained instead at the genkan. "State your business."

"Are you sure you don't want to sit, Tatsumi- san? You look bigger since the last time that I saw you—really, even though you are a man, pregnancy has its toll on the body. Your back and ankles should be aching as I speak."

The matronly woman spoke with an air of confidence, as though she knew what she was talking about. Right at the moment, Souichi's treacherous back twitched. But he was already pissed as hell; this woman had no right to comment on his pregnancy, or his body for that matter! "It's none of your business; if you are not going to get to the point, it'd do best for you to leave. My patience has a limit!"

"Tsk tsk, such temper. Haven't you heard that your mood affects the baby's development, Tatsumi- san? Suzuki- san should have taught you that, or is she so inept that she does not even know such things? To think that she called herself my mentor! Hah!"

Wha—Suzuki- san? This woman was acquainted with his pre- natal instructor? And she said that she had seen him before… Souichi bolted forwards, gripping the woman by the arms. "You were the culprit! The one who installed the camera in front of our apartment didn't you!"

Wincing, the woman struggled free. Retreating further into the apartment, she smiled sharply. "Took you long enough to realise that, huh? Enough small talk, I'm here to negotiate with you. If you want me to keep my mouth shut about your and Morinaga- san's homosexual relationship from his company, pay me two million yen. If you refuse, photos of you and Morinaga- san in certain, compromising positions, would be sent anonymously to S Pharmaceuticals tonight by courier, and the Internet would be flooded with the other photos that I have not sold to the newspapers. Do we have a deal, Tatsumi- san?"

"…This is all about money, isn't it? You must have known about us from Suzuki- san's side, knew about my pregnancy, and decided to exploit it to extort us for cash, right? Despicable! I'm calling the cops." Striding past her, Souichi headed straight to his cell charging on the table. "If you think that your threat scares me, you can think again!"

"Stop! If you press another button, I'll immediately send those photos out! Don't you care about him, Tatsumi- san? Don't you care that people would label Morinaga Tetsuhiro as a disgusting homo who nearly caused his first male lover to die because he was so ashamed about their sordid affair? Do you want the entire company and the world to know that Morinaga- san got disowned by his own family and escaped to Nagoya because of the resultant scandal of the suicide attempt? Tatsumi- san, don't you care at all?"

Souichi's fingers froze before he could tap the last number for the police hotline. He turned slowly to look at the witch who was standing proudly in their living room, the smile on her face saying that she knew that she had him good. Ice ran through his veins as he realized that this woman was more malicious than he had imagined. Morinaga…The image of him, of his agonized face, twisted his guts. "You—"

"So do we have a deal, Tatsumi- san? It's two million yen. If you dally further, it'll be three million. I'm giving you a chance to save your lover, Tatsumi- san!" The woman raised her cell mockingly.

"He doesn't need to save me, nor give you the money."

The quiet voice of Morinaga broke into the tense atmosphere. Souichi jerked around and saw his partner, still wearing his parka as he stepped into the living room. There was a rustling sound as Morinaga dropped the bags and went over to him, wrapping a hand protectively around Souichi's waist. "Morinaga—?"

"Are you all right, Sempai?" At Souichi's numb nod, the other man gave him a reassuring squeeze before turning to glare at the stunned woman. "I don't know who you are, but get the hell out of my house now. I've already alerted the police. If you don't wish to be arrested for trespassing and violation of privacy rights, I suggest that you take your rotten deal and leave!"

The mention of the police seemed to work the trick this time. However, after a few seconds of hesitation, the woman seemed to regain her composure. "Don't think that I'll believe that you called the cops! That would just attract more media attention, no? You'd better give me three million yen, or your reputation and future would go down the drain!"

"Go ahead. I'm not afraid," Morinaga's voice was quiet but Souichi could hear a hint of steel that only appeared when the man was dead serious. "You may say what you like but what you are passing on would only be rumours that can be easily disproved by the people involved…I may be homosexual and that may indeed cost me my job but if you threaten my family because of that, you are going to suffer the consequences!" The sound of police sirens suddenly pierced the air.

"Y-you, you really called the cops!" Turning to run, the woman looked back at the two of them with hatred. "This is not the end! You'll see—you'll see!" The door slammed on her proclamation.

Morinaga immediately went to the door, sliding the lock and chain securely. When he had checked that the woman had really left, the man came back to Souichi's side, an anxious expression on his boyish face. "Sempai, I'm sorry that I wasn't home with you just now; did the woman hurt you? Are you okay—is the baby okay?"

As Morinaga's hands ran over his face and body frenetically, Souichi realized that they were both trembling. He shook his head and pushed Morinaga away, making his way haphazardly to the bedroom. His bankbook was in the safe… "Morinaga, get that woman back here—I should have two million yen in my savings; if I tell her that I'd transfer the funds immediately, she should be fine with the amount."

"—No, Sempai; we can't give in to her deman—"

"Go and get her!" Souichi shouted, pushing the shocked man towards the door. "I'd rather give her the cash than have her ruin your future—!"

"…Sempai," Morinaga took hold of Souichi's hands, stilling his frantic motions. "If she wants to say all those things, let her—I'm not afraid of anything anymore…The only person in the world whom I'd be scared of being rejected by, is you, Sempai." Those olive- green eyes gazed deeply into Souichi's, quieting his anxiety with the certainty that he saw in them. "But you have accepted me fully, given me your love and your name—with you, I don't want for anything else. I said it before; you, and the baby, are what matter the most."

"But, the scandal in your hometown—didn't you not want others to know? And you worked hard to get the position at S Pharmaceuticals, too—" Souichi mumbled, flushing at the mushy words that nonetheless still made his heart skip. "Damnit, after all that we have done, the thing I feared most has still occurred…!"

"You were afraid for me, Sempai?" Morinaga's tone sounded all too happy as he kissed Souichi's knuckles, a thumb rubbing circular motions on his palm.

"Of course I would, baka!" Souichi had all but forgotten about the getting the bankbook as he glared at the man in front of him, who was all but bubbling over with his joy. God, why did he even love such a simple idiot? "I never wanted the pregnancy to hinder you in your career, I never wanted us to become your burden, damnit..." To Souichi's mortification, the back of his eyes prickled. "Shit…"

"Sempai…" Gently, Morinaga pressed him close, his arms forming a comforting cocoon that was warm and reassuring. "If you want to talk about being a burden, then aren't I your biggest one?" Soft kisses sprinkled on his head and Souichi closed his eyes over the quiet tears. "I forced my way into your life... If I hadn't done so, you wouldn't have gotten pregnant and had to give up your research at the university..." Morinaga's voice became more subdued as they held each other in the doorway of their bedroom. "So please don't say that you are my burden, Sempai-you were and would never be a trouble to me. Everything will be all right, I promise. If something really happens at work because of this, I'll be the one to take care of it, so please don't cry for me anymore, my love."

"…Who said that I was crying, idiot…" Leaning into Morinaga's chest, Souichi wiped at his eyes surreptitiously. Above him, he heard the trembling breaths that his lover was trying to hide. They had exposed their secret fears, didn't they? The fear of burdening the other, the overwhelming urge to protect him from all the harms in the world...So this was what love was about. A bittersweet warmth enveloped him and Souichi breathed out heavily, his own arms wrapped around Morinaga's slim waist. He would stay like this for a little longer, just until this bout of uncharacteristic sentimentality passed...

"I was thinking if it might be better to talk to my superior about this myself. Even if that woman does not carry out her threat, the news of our pregnancy might have already reached Tokyo…" Morinaga gave a small sigh then squeezed Souichi tightly. " What do you think, Sempai?"

"Yea, that's a good idea. It would preempt that woman's lies." Souichi shifted uncomfortably and finally pushed away from his grasp. His calves were aching from the prolonged standing. "Looks like I have to contact Suzuki- san about this; that woman mentioned about being her disciple or something." Something nagged at the back of his mind until he suddenly remembered. "The police—!"

Morinaga suddenly laughed mischievously. "I didn't call the police at all! It was just a ruse; I was also shocked when the sirens rang—what a lucky coincidence." They unfolded from the embrace and Souichi was guided to the sofa. "We shouldn't let that woman spoil our day, Sempai! I'll prepare a good lunch while you call Suzuki- san." Morinaga pecked the corner of his lips, grinning when Souichi startled and growled at him.

"I can't believe your optimism…" But Morinaga was already moving to the kitchenette. Souichi picked up his cell, biting his lips contemplatively. Could Suzuki- san have betrayed their confidence? The jolly countenance of the midwife flashed through his mind. She had seemed so trustworthy, an experienced pre- natal instructor that had come at Isogai's and Dr. Hako's recommendations. A cold pang ran through him. Determined, he began to dial the numbers, hearing the ringing tone as though from far away. A click sounded and a sweet voice reached his ears.

"Hello, Souichi-kun?"

To be continued.