Disclaimer: Nope. Still don't own Castle.

[No Spoilers in reviews please...]

A/N: Dedicated to thaolu9 for the general starting concept! Never forget Flashpoint33 though for the general inspiration of her work! I think I should stop writing this, because it seriously cannot stand to be in the same room as '226 Miles' particularly Chapters 16/17...

A/N 2 (but not lesser!): Special thanks to my beta (elizabeth . bynog) for all the correction & comments.

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Beckett made quick exit from his room, the intensive care unit, and indeed the hospital: making an almost begging phone call to her father, to meet at the diner again. The only real thought rolling through her head as she sat in the cab was that Castle, and even more importantly Rick, had absolutely no idea who she was.

She arrived first, she'd expected it, expected to have to wait; to have time to process, to organize her thoughts, and sip her coffee. Nothing was helping though, couldn't even drink the coffee, it just wasn't right; tasted stale, empty on her tongue. Kate's thoughts were a jumble, too many worries about Castle, herself, their apparently non-existent past and probably future. All clashing in her mind with a decision she would now have to make alone; a decision that may have completely changed in nature now.

She knew it was her father behind her even before he put a hand on her shoulder, "Katie? How are you? You sounded a little off on the phone."

Kate watched as her dad once again sat down opposite her, filling him in as he ordered coffee for himself, trying to keep to the facts, her one place of refuge now, "Castle's hurt dad, he got hit by a cab. It was an accident, but I wasn't with him at the time. Happened on Wednesday."

Jim's face was shocked, he appeared speechless for a moment, before collecting himself, "I'm so sorry. Is he going to be okay? And why am I only hearing of this now? It's Friday."

"He's going to be fine dad, he'll need rehab though, it'll be a long recovery. I was distracted dad, so much going on; I should have called you before, if just to cry on your shoulder instead of Martha's."

"That's not the whole story is it? The accident. Tell me Katie, don't make this like pulling teeth."

It was hard every time she thought about it, that he didn't remember, memories of them were lost in some amnesiac cloud, "Well, he's going to be physically fine dad, but he's got amnesia. Doesn't remember the last seven years. Doesn't remember me at all."

That was perhaps the worst case Jim could imagine, she'd lost her father to old memories for years as he drowned himself in an alcoholic stupor to try and deaden the loss of Johanna. "Oh Katie I'm so sorry! Will they come back? Amnesia is usually temporary right?"

That had been the one hope Kate had been hanging onto really, that all this would be temporary, his memories would come back quickly; until Evelyn's expert option that it may be a false hope. "Sometimes temporary dad. The doctor doesn't think all his memories will ever come back. He's probably never going to remember what we were to each other."

There was a click in his mind then, a reminder of their earlier conversation, of concerns and uncertainties she'd voiced before, "What were you to each other Katie? Did you ever decide? A couple of dancers having fun for a while, or something more? Something you'd never let happen before? Never let get this far."

She shook her head at him, "It doesn't matter now dad, whatever we were, whatever we were going to be has been wiped away. It's gone, we're over now."

He knew she was evading, as she had so many times before, "If you're so sure about all that why did you call me? You seemed upset, not sure Katie."

"I don't know dad, everything is so complicated now; I still need to make a decision about the job."

"I thought you'd decided? You said you wanted the job the last time we spoke here, you seemed very convinced about it."

"Just the last case dad, the interrogation after I left you here, it made me wonder a bit; a bit about what my life would be like if I took it. What I'd have to give up."

"What you'd have to give up by hiding in your work again? Is that what's holding you back Katie?"

A little bit of a defensive note crept into her tone, "What do you mean? I love my work, I don't hide in it; just sometimes get wrapped up that's all."

"But why? Do you want me to look at your situation as a lawyer Katie? Reason free from Passion?"

Sometimes her father could be so exasperating; philosophical discourse now? Really? "Is this really the time for Aristotle dad?"

"It is if you want to apply nothing but logic Katie, rather than you heart. Before, you told me you wanted the job, your only uncertainty seemed to be that you didn't want Rick to hate you, weren't sure if you could live with yourself if he did. But now you tell me he doesn't even remember you. He can't hate what he doesn't remember Katie."

Kate hadn't really let it sink in, no she didn't have to worry about being hated anymore, what that would do to her; but she didn't have anything else to look forward to either, "No dad, he's not going to hate me now; not going to love me either."

"What are you afraid of? A life without those emotions or a life with them? You dreamed of being a lawyer, following in your mother's footsteps. But only law should be reason free from passion Katie, life shouldn't be, life should be filled with emotion. Your mother's was Katie; she was passionate about me, us, justice. She was filled with passion and that's why I still miss her every day."

Kate felt a little of her backbone returning, her father had no right bringing up her mother like this, like she was letting her down, when he was the one who self-destructed, who let them both down, her tone hardened, "What do you think I should do dad? Reject the job? I'd be great at it, I know I would, that's why they picked me. I'm passionate about my work, why can't that be enough?"

"I'm not trying to tell you want to do Katie, you're too stubborn to listen if I tried; but work has been bad habit for you sometimes, not a constructive one. Regardless of that, if you truly just want this job Katie, then you have nothing to hold you back anymore."

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"Yo Castle!"

Rick was distracted away from the television in his new room by the noisy entrance of two men. His self-acknowledged eye for detail meant that he recognized their faces from Doctor Andrews' long list of photographs earlier; beyond that though, nothing, nothing at all.

They were exciting though, they knew his name; so there must be some sort of connection between them, "Hello?"

The Hispanic one grinned at him, "Bro don't worry, we know; you don't recognized us right?"

"Actually I saw photos of you, I recognize the faces but I don't know who you are."

The other one spoke up for the first time, "Kevin Ryan, NYPD detective. He's Javier Esposito, also NYPD detective."

It all began to make sense, these must be a few of the other detectives he'd worked on cases with. "Ok guys. Hi. Kevin and Javier, you work with Kate?"

The two detectives glanced at each other, questioning glances exchanged, "Bro that just sounds weird."

Kevin looked positively uncomfortable, shifting slightly on his feet, "Seriously, sounds wrong coming out of your mouth like that Castle."

Rick glanced between the two, the conversation starting to feel a little surreal, "What? Why Castle? The other detective, Kate, she called me Castle too."

Javier apparently felt the need to fill him in, speaking like he would to a child, it was so mind numbingly obviously to him; maybe he thought Castle had more than memory loss. "It's a cop thing. Last names, everyone goes by last names. Ryan, Esposito, you called Kate Beckett too, that's just weird explaining her to you. We call you Castle."

"You write mysteries dude, how did you not know this already?"

"I write about private investigators and spies more than cops. At least recently."

The two detectives shared another knowing look, turning back and speaking simultaneously, "Not anymore." They looked at each other again after that, sharing a fist bump.

They knew more than they were letting on, more of his story, more of his life. "What? I've written books about cops? What are they? Come on guys! Tell me. Please!"

"Nah!"

"No way bro, we'll let someone else share that surprise. Just wanted to check on you, see you in person. You look great, for a guy that lost a fight with a yellow cab."

"I was hit by a cab?"

"Seriously dude has no one told you anything?"

No, it appeared everyone else had decided to treat him like a child, rather than the grown man he was, "Apparently not."

"Well, we'll shut up and get out of here then, before we spill any other secrets. See ya later."

"Bye Castle."

He watched them leave, a little confused by their rapid entrance and exit; they'd let some hints slip though, some things about him that he needed filled in. Nobody else to quiz right now though, and his head was starting to pound again, so he pressed the nurse call button before turning back to the television, back to yet another rerun of Temptation Lane.

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On arriving back at Bellevue Beckett found Castle had been moved, she'd been told it was going to happen, but was still shocked at how quickly things were moving. So little time in each place for him or her, so little time to find their footing before circumstances changed.

Approaching his new room in the general recovery department she heard voices, he appeared to be having the news of his condition broken to him. Unsure, Kate hesitated, should she go in? He didn't even remember her name, she had no real right to be present; they had no relationship anymore.

Martha was speaking, her voice projecting a perhaps false sense of confidence, but was relatively convincing regardless, "Richard, you have amnesia, you know that. I just told you that."

He was playing along, having a little fun, seriously he thought, it was pretty obvious hours ago that he had amnesia, but his mother only comes clean now? "I thought it might be a joke, you know, an elaborate prank; what day is it?"

"It's not your birthday Richard if that's what your wondering, and no this is not a prank."

Obviously not a prank, but still, so many things he just didn't know; what was true about his life now? "So I'm not married to Gina?"

Gina's voice broken in, she had obviously taken some time from her busy schedule to make an appearance, "We are divorced Richard. Have been for years. We didn't work out."

"You don't want to give it another chance? It's just to me I... Well I remember us as married. We had issues, but we were still married."

"We gave it another chance Richard, it didn't work out then either; you were too enamored with someone else."

Someone else? There was someone else? "Who?"

"Not my business anymore Richard. Anyway I just wanted to stop by and see how my favorite writer was doing. On the plus side, maybe you can write another Derrick Storm book since you don't remember killing him off!"

Rick's voice rose, "I killed Storm!?" The near screech was accompanied by a more rapid beeping of his heart rate monitor.

The firm, controlled voice of Doctor Andrews rang out, "Enough! Ms Cowell, please, he needs to remain calm, his blood pressure and pulse under control; Richard is still seriously injured."

"I understand, I'm leaving anyway; it was good to see you doing so well Richard."

Kate backed away from the door as Gina slipped out, studying her for a moment. Gina was, as always, very well put together, dress designed to show off her assets, perfectly styled hair, and stilettos accentuated her legs. She was the archetype of Castle's prior girlfriends, so different from Kate herself. Blonde, busty; not brunette, svelte. That had always confused her, made her uncertain; was his attraction to her the mark of something new or just a temporary aberration? An experiment?

Gina had completely stepped from the room, closing the door behind her, before she noticed Kate stood outside, "Detective Beckett? I'm surprised you're still here."

Her tone grated on Kate's nerves, maybe it was just the sound of all of Castle's ex-wives that grated on her nerves, "Why wouldn't I be here? My boyfriend is in there."

Gina's expression clearly indicated doubts about that, "Well I suppose. Anyway I cleared up the whole marriage issue, his memory really is a mess right now."

Kate could hardly stand the seeming lack of empathy shown, responding dryly, "Thanks for stopping by."

"I didn't do it for you Detective." Gina apparently couldn't resist tossing in a few additional last works, speaking over her shoulder as she paced down the corridor towards the elevators. "Anyway, he's all yours now."

All hers? Was he really all hers? How was a man who couldn't even remember her name be considered anything of hers? She was running out of time to call Freedman, a final decision had to be made. Made soon.

She could perhaps rebuild what she had with him, it would take time, investment; and be so difficult, so much of what they were was built on a foundation of working together, spending hours and hours of their days in constant company. He wouldn't be able to work at the precinct again for months at least; maybe never again given the damage to his legs. Kate hoped he'd fully recover, but didn't want to hold out for false hope; maybe that part of their lives was over no matter what decision she made.

Nothing about them was a sure thing, not of the sort that the job offered; she knew she could excel in the role if she dedicated herself to it. Could she excel with Rick though, was it a sure thing? Was he coming to the swings to break up with her? To make demands, give her an ultimatum? She didn't know, wasn't sure what the future held even when they'd had what felt like, until recently, a strong foundation. Now all that was gone.

Could she give up this monumental job opportunity for the potential of some future relationship with a man who no longer even knew her? A relationship that perhaps would go nowhere but to eventual failure anyway? Risk giving in to passion, only to have it burn out in the future, leaving her a hollow husk again? Or give in to the reason and logic of the job, just like the one that had kept her putting one foot in front of the other for years before she even met Castle.

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After Gina left the room Rick turned his gaze on Martha, "I was enamored? Do I have girlfriend mother? Am I married again? Gina said we were divorced, that would be two; did I do it again? Did it last? Mother! Answer me please, I need to know."

Martha could see him getting more agitated, Richard had always been a people person, playing the fool to gain attention and be liked; people, relationships, their stories, she knew it was what he lived for, and to be missing part of his own must be driving him crazy, or more crazy than normal. She was hesitating though, did he really need more stress right now? "Richard, please calm down dear, you're hurt!"

He turned to Alexis, a pleading look on his face, "Pumpkin? Please tell me what's going on."

"Grams... We have to tell him, to explain, he needs to know."

Rick was looking back and forth between his two favorite red heads, "What? What do I need to know?"

Martha nodded, she supposed it was time, he may not fully grasp everything with so much context missing, but he needed to know. She pulled Alexis towards her and both stepped up tight beside the bed, no need for any of this to be said too loudly, everyone needed to remain calm now.

Doctor Andrews stepped towards the door then, "If you can keep him calm Martha, tell him whatever he wants to know; the sooner he catches up the better. I'll leave you all alone."

Martha tried to convey in her tone just how much Kate meant to him, trying to channel Juliet speaking of Romeo, hoping the future wasn't as tragic for her son, "Yes Richard, you have a girlfriend, one you think the world of; I've never seen you love anyone else quite as much as you do Kate."

Rick twitched at the sound of a familiar name, "Kate? Detective Kate? The one who was in here earlier? I didn't remember her." He had remembered her, but not like that, just from the photo, she was certainly attractive though; she'd looked sad when they had talked, he had presumed just the sadness of seeing a friend hurt.

"I know Richard, you've known each other five years, that time is gone for now."

"How did we meet? What's our story?"

"I'd prefer to let you talk that out with Katherine, just.. you've had a long and complex relationship Richard, especially just recently."

"What happened? What was going on between us?"

"Again Richard that's between you and her." She reached into her pocket then, pulling out the ring as she continued, "Just know that you were carrying this when you had the accident."

Ricks eyes were slightly wide at the sight of the ring, and choked out, "That's an engagement ring! I was going to propose?"

Alexis reached out to touch his face, to provide some comfort to offset his obvious confusion, "We don't know dad."

"We don't know if you were going to, or had already when you had the accident. Only you and Katherine know that."

He unfurled his right hand and weakly wiggled his fingers, "Put it on my pinkie. I wanted to marry her. I loved her. But I don't remember her at all; she never said anything when she came to see me you know."

"Katherine has never been a woman of many words Richard, but she loved you too."

"You think I might have already asked and she said no?"

"Dad, we don't know; please don't run off on a wild theory chase now okay?"

Rick had tears in his eyes now, the pain of not knowing, not remembering so many important things, his own story, overwhelming the physical pain of his injuries. "I don't know what to do. I hate this. I don't remember one of the most important women in my life? What do I do?"

"All you can do Richard is talk to her when she comes back to see you."

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Beckett made her way out of the hospital, pulling her phone out again; time was up, her decision made. She thought back to the blank look on his face when he had told her that he didn't know who she was. Just the memory of it just reaffirmed her decision: the job was a great opportunity, and she had nothing worth staying for anyway.

Scrolling again through her recent call she hit connect and in moments was hearing a familiar voice, "Deputy Director Freedman's office. Danielle speaking."

"Danielle, it's Katherine Beckett; I'd like to speak to him please. I have his answer."

"I'll put you right through Detective."

After only a momentary silence Freedman's voice once again challenged her, "Detective Beckett, you have an answer for me?"

Kate felt a momentary hesitation run though her; there was nothing to hold her back now, it was time to take the next career step, and move on from a relationship that was no more, "Agent Beckett sir. When do I start?"