Disclaimer: Nope. Still don't own Castle.

[No Spoilers in reviews please...]

A/N: What can I say, I had a lot of trouble with this chapter. So... I started reading 'Justice For Hedgehogs' instead of writing, I thought there'd be a delay. [Umm, yeah; I also wrote 'Watergate' which was an unpopular decision; If ever mentioned again it shall hereafter be named 'Waterhate'] Follow the hedgehog for it shall show you the path. Chapter 6 is written too now (rough, not filled out yet!)

A/N 2: To the 'guest' review of chapter 4 who asked for a happy fic, well I'll see what I can do for the next one; all this angst and stress is giving me an ulcer. I have been reading everyone's reviews, but taking a break from responding individually right now because I have this urge to explain things when I do; and I can't be having that right now. Sorry.

Beta Note: Special thanks once again to my beta (elizabeth . bynog) for all the corrections & comments; and for struggling through all the technical challenges for this chapter.

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Martha was sitting beside Richard's bed, both of them watching yet another rerun of Temptation Lane when her phone pinged. She may have been of an older generation than Alexis, but nothing beat the convenience of text messaging for setting up evening assignations. Glancing down at it she saw it was from Paula, simply saying [Page 6 website]. Unfortunately that was a bit more complicated, text messages she could handle with a certain aplomb, but websites on her phone?

"Richard? Do you have your iPad?"

"Nope. Too much eye strain or brain strain or something." They wouldn't let him have any to read either, or anything to write with; he was getting incredibly frustrated and irritated having absolute to nothing to do. Bored, and he remembered that bored Rick was irritated Rick; prone to doing all sorts of things he shouldn't, like irritating his mother just because he could. She'd called him petulant in the past, when he was bored, but kids were petulant, adults were irritated; and he was definitely an adult. A bored and irritated one.

"Then why is the television on?"

"Not supposed to be."

"Well turn it off!"

"Nope."

"Richard, you must look after yourself. Please? For me, for Alexis."

"Why give me the remote if it's supposed to be off? Just unplug.."

Martha prompt stood up, walked across the room and did precisely that: pulled the plug. "Well that's one problem solved Richard."

"Hey! That was the only entertainment I had. I'm just gonna have to go back to plotting steamy sex scenes between Derrick and Clara in my head now."

"Richard!"

"Plug the television back in and I'll stop."

"No. Anyway, Paula say we need to look at the Page 6 website."

"Well that can't be good."

"Probably not, so how do I do it?"

"With your phone."

"I know that! How?"

"Give it to me."

"No, you shouldn't be moving around that much. We should wait for Alexis to get back. She's only gone to fetch dinner, something better than hospital food."

"If I can work a remote, I can work your phone. Now give it to me!"

After a little bit of fiddling, they managed to get the Page 6 website up on the phone, and after some squinting managed to discern what it said.

"Forgotten Castle? Rumors are flying that Richard Castle, losing participant in a game of vehicular tag earlier this week, is suffering from amnesia, and not a little bit of it but years worth. Enough that it may take Derrick Storm, private investigator extraordinaire, coming out of retirement to find those memories again. More as we hear it!"

There were few who knew about his amnesia as this stage, family and a few detectives, it seemed unlikely that any of them would be a source of a leak. Maybe one of the detectives or nurses had been slipped a $100 to spill the story, he didn't know them well enough to gauge. Paula was a possibility, but she had given them the heads up, and had always been loyal, always followed his instructions, primarily in protecting Alexis rather than him, but still it seemed unlikely. He remembered the earlier discussion with his not-wife, how she'd brought up Derrick Storm; that perhaps he could make a comeback. Gina seemed the most likely source, and he could test his understanding of their relationship, a little feeling out of where things stood, with this latest little nugget, "Well I think I know why I divorced Gina. Sneaky much?"

"Personally I'll take Gina over Meredith anytime. Do you want to speak to Paula?"

Interesting but inconclusive data point, he didn't trust Meredith an inch either, even though she was his daughter's mother, and far more adventurous in the sack than Gina had even been; so not exactly an endorsement of Gina, nicely ambiguous really. Well played Mother!

"No point in calling Paula Mother, it's true anyway right? I suppose she should release an official statement though."

Martha knew he was used to living his life in the public eye, but still, some things should remain private; and Gina should have kept this health information confidential, "I'll call her right now Richard, tell her to ask for privacy too."

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Beckett stepped off the elevator on the homicide floor of the 12th precinct, it had been her home away from home for so many years now, so many cases investigated and closed; to leave it behind would be hard, but just as she'd moved on from patrol, to vice, and eventually to homicide, she'd settle into her new role in DC, have plenty of work to distract her.

Ryan and Espo were at their desks, looking up as she approached, noting the lack of her normal wardrobe; a more relaxed outfit appropriate for a day spent stressing at the hospital.

"Hey Beckett, how's Castle?"

"No change guys, you going to be here a little bit? I need to speak to Gates then I need to tell you something okay? The break room in ten minutes?"

They guys looked at each other, they knew something had been going on before Castle was hurt, then the whole accident just pushed that to the back of their minds, but maybe it was finally going to come out. They both nodded and made affirmative noises, watching as Beckett moved towards Gates' office.

"Sir? You have a few minutes?"

"Detective Beckett, absolutely. How is Mister Castle doing?"

"No changes sir. Physically he has a long road ahead, the amnesia, well they don't really know how that's going to play out."

"Well, give him my best wishes when you see him again. Now what else can I do for you? Need a few more days off?"

"No sir. Well, yes sir, but not for that. I've verbally accepted the offer sir, the federal job in DC."

"Well congratulations Detective, I won't say I'll be happy losing my best detective; but your team has an extraordinary track record and you deserve the recognition it's brought."

"I need to turn in resignation paper work, to you I suppose?"

"Yes. You can get the forms from HR on 2. When you have prepped a packet, bring it in, make sure it's signed, and I'll forward on to 1PP with my approval signature too. I'll pull you off the rotation starting right now."

Beckett stood then and offered her hand across the desk, "It's been an honor sir."

Gates gave her a firm handshake, and a warm smile, "It has. Good luck Beckett, I have high hopes for you."

The guys were waiting for her in the break room when she joined them, busy making themselves an afternoon coffee. Beckett had to stop and stare. The coffee she had survived on for so long, that had been the fuel for her investigations had long since stopped being simple coffee, each morning it had been far more than the energy needed to start a day, and when it hasn't been hand delivered she had missed it, missed the delivery guy too. The last few days coffee had been something else, not battery acid in monkey pee, but something that hurt going down just as much.

Ryan was the first to notice her, giving Esposito a nudge before turning to face her, cappuccino in hand, "Beckett you want a coffee? I know you can't really work this thing without Castle to hold your hand."

"I can make my own coffee you know."

"We know Beckett, you just prefer his. Anyway, what's going on? Why do you need to tell us?"

Best pull the bandaid off quickly she supposed, no need to drag it out, "I got a job offer working for the Attorney General's office, a federal task force. Guys... I accepted."

They both just stood staring at her for a while before Esposito spoke up, "What? Run that by us again."

"I'm leaving. Moving to DC."

"You're quitting the NYPD? What about the team? What about Castle? This is the first we hear about it?"

"Guys, it's been great working with you but it's time for me to move on, a federal job is a great opportunity, more resources, bigger cases, a chance to really make a difference."

"Really make a difference? We don't..."

"Bro, she's moving on, we all do it; all leave the old team behind for the better opportunity. I left gangs, you left narcotics; it's what cops do."

"I thought we were more than just a team dude."

"Well so did I, but Beckett has to do what's best for her. Right?"

That last comment was directed at her Beckett realized, "It's just too good an opportunity guys, all our work here, our closure rate, it's all being recognized now."

Ryan was uncomfortable still, with the way they been completely blindsided here, like they weren't good enough for her, but pushed the one thing she hadn't touched, "What about Castle? Your personal life might not be our business, but the guy is hurt. Does he even know you're leaving?"

"No... He found out I was interviewing, but he didn't know about the offer before the accident... you know it really is none of your business guys. My personal life is mine, let's leave it at that."

Esposito did not look happy at that response, "That how it's gonna be Beckett? I back you without question, put my career on the line for you; but we ask you a personal question and it's all: butt out?"

Beckett didn't like that, her hackles rising, her life was hers, not theirs to poke into at will. "It's not like that guys! Just Castle and I, it's private okay? He doesn't even know who I am now; doesn't recognize me at all, I have no reason to stay now!"

Esposito and Ryan were constantly sharing glances now, with Esposito in particular irritated by her last response, "What are we? Chopped liver? Seriously you're saying you'd stay if Castle remembered you? I don't believe that."

"It's not that simple guys!"

Ryan was trying to be the voice of reason, both Beckett and Esposito had hair trigger tempers sometimes, and things were running the risk of spiraling out of control, he couldn't deny though, that her handling of all this stung. "It's not that complicated either Beckett. If it's about Castle, well he needs you now more than ever; if it's just about the job, and Castle is irrelevant, us too, well good luck, wish you the best and all."

Beckett stood up and walked away, didn't want to deal with this now, the guys were being unreasonable; she'd thought they'd be happy for her, proud that she'd be carrying the NYPD name to such a high profile new position.

Esposito watched Beckett walk back across the homicide floor, perhaps the last time he'd see her in a long, long time. It just didn't make sense, the whole situation didn't make sense. He pulled out his cell and hit the speed dial.

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"Hi Dad! I brought Chinese."

Martha watched as Alexis asked up to her father's bed and started pulling out containers of Chinese food, wondering how many hospital rules they'd be breaking by feeding Richard anything but green Jello.

"Thanks Pumpkin, but I can't work chopsticks right now."

"Don't worry dad, I brought you a spork from home."

He smiled so wide it looked like his face might split open then, reaching slowly for the offered utensil and a container of Mongolian beef. Martha plucked the engagement ring off his pinkie finger as he reached out, mouthing "for safe keeping" to him as she slipped it back into her pocket.

As he was digging in, such that slow methodically shoveling of food directly from container to mouth could be called eating of any sort, Alexis quietly spoke to Martha, "Grams? I got extra, is Kate here?"

"No dear, haven't seen her since this afternoon; I think she's having an understandably hard time dealing with all this."

A soft nod her only acknowledgment of that, as if they weren't all having a hard time dealing with the accident and amnesia, "Well, more for Dad."

After stuffing their faces with far too much food and laughing over their completely bizarre fortune cookies, they settled in to watch a little television. Martha had plugged it back in with strict rules about how long Richard was allowed to watch it, and a caveat that even the slightest sign of a headache and it would be promptly unplugged.

"Dad?"

"Yeah Pumpkin?"

After the last time Alexis was really hesitant to bring up the topic, but Kate hadn't stayed at the loft in almost a week, and she doubted she'd be back while her dad was in the hospital. More than anything she didn't want to be alone at the loft when she was there.

"Mom is going to arrive tomorrow remember? Can she stay at the loft? There's no one else there right now, so..."

"But Gina..."

"Dad, Gina doesn't live at the loft anymore, remember?"

"Right. Right. Divorced. Ok, sure, whatever."

Alexis watched as Rick lost interest in everything after that, stopped talking, resumed staring at the television, with a zoned out expression on his face. Every time some new memory hole, or a reminder of one, came up he seemed to withdraw a little from everything around him, bury himself a little more into his own mind and the memories he had left.

After a while Alexis' phone started to vibrate, glancing at it she saw [Dr Parish], she stepped outside her dad's room to answer, not sure why she'd be getting a call from her former boss.

"Doctor Parish, what can I do for you?"

The voice at the other end was clipped, short, sounded like it was on the edge of some stronger emotion, "When did Kate last visit your dad Alexis?"

"I don't know, she was here about midday when we got the official diagnosis, but I haven't seen her since. Why? Is everything okay?"

There was a clear pause, a deep breath from Doctor Parish, before she continued, "You let me worry about her Alexis. How's your dad?"

"As well as can be expected really, he hates not knowing things and it's really getting to him I think."

"Ha! Yeah, I could see that would drive him crazy. Okay Alexis I gotta go take care of some stuff, you look after your dad okay? He's gonna need you."

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Beckett had picked up her resignation paperwork from the 12th and headed home, spending the rest of the afternoon and early evening nibbling on take-out Chinese and checking out websites on DC. Mainly apartment hunting, having decided, at least initially to lease rather than sell her NYC spot and buy in DC; it felt a little noncommittal, but she couldn't bring herself to totally move on from Manhattan yet. The resignation paper work sat untouched bedside her computer keyboard, no need to fill it in until later.

A loud knocking, even pounding, began at her apartment door, accompanied by a firm sounding voice, "Kate Beckett, you let me in right now!"

Lanie. She assumed that Esposito had told her the news; she'd meant to call her, really had, but the distractions of beginning to look into the reality of DC had obviously consumed too much time. So her friend had come to her instead, obviously unsatisfied with the thought of talking over the phone given how their last conversation had ended.

Opening her door, she was immediately pushed out of the way as Lanie barged in, "Girlfriend! We need to talk. Get us some wine too!"

Beckett watched her friend walk across her apartment a plop down casually on the sofa, showing every sign of settling in for the evening, "Lanie? Do we have to? I've made my decision."

Lanie peered over the back of the couch making drink gestures towards her face, clearly expecting a glass of wine, and petting it now, "I'm not here about that. You want to make something more for your life, dedicate yourself to a career. I did that girl! Med school was no walk in the park, it ate my life for years; but I don't regret it for an instant. I got no problem with you chasing the job if that's what you want and you think it's best for you. I'll support you in that girl, 100 percent."

Wandering into her kitchen and grabbing a couple of glasses and a half empty bottle of red, she was a little confused, Lanie was not in a happy mood obviously, but clearly not for the reason she first thought, "Then why are you here? Why are you angry, upset, whatever it is you are?"

Lanie took one of the wine glasses and poured herself a generous helping, half of which she immediately gulped; not a good sign in Kate's experience. "Because you're being a fool Kate. The way you're telling people? It's like your deliberately trying to piss them off. You hide the whole thing from the guys then just kind of slap them with it. They understand moving on, they just don't understand why you blindsided them."

Kate didn't really know what to say, the whole thing had been so unexpected, the hints from Stack, the phone call, background check, interview, everything, "Honestly Lanie, it just moved too fast.."

Lanie huffed at her, another sign of disapproval Kate knew well. "I know that ain't true, you know it too; that job interview and offer didn't happen overnight, you planned it, you went after it. Your friends deserved better than this. You hid from us when you were hurt too; I for one thought you'd learnt a lesson from that."

"I know I should have handled it better, I know that; I was going to apologize, to Castle, to the guys, I shouldn't have kept it all secret."

"No you shouldn't. You owe the guys a drink. At least one. It'll be a start."

Kate actually felt a relief, Lanie thought they'd all be okay. "I can do that."

"Yeah you can girl!" Lanie took another big swallow then paused and spoke again, a softer gentler tone than she'd been using, "What about Castle?"

Kate couldn't help but hesitate herself, unsure where her friend was going with this, "What about him Lanie? He doesn't remember me."

"So you're not planning on saying goodbye? Just gonna up and leave?"

Kate's ire was rising again, every time the topic came up she would feel her blood pulsing, "What's the point? He won't miss me. He doesn't remember me!"

"Not the point at all Kate! You remember him! You had your issues, sure. But you loved that guy Kate. Love him maybe still. You want the last memories you have of him to be what? What was the last thing you said to him?"

You don't remember me. The time before that, we need to talk. Not what she'd wish her last words to be. "Don't remember."

"Bull! Try again, I don't believe you."

Kate snapped, "Why are you making this so hard Lanie!?"

"Because you both deserve a better ending than this! You want out? Ok. But you deserve, you need closure or this will stick with you and you'll regret it later."

"Maybe Lanie, I don't know, I'll think about it okay?"

"Sure girl! Enough moaning and moping. Let's drink! To the future!"

They clinked gasses and settled in for a night of simple chat and reminiscing. Lanie eventually ended up leaving well after midnight, perhaps one bottle of wine too many, and a highly amused watching of Magic Mike.

Saturday morning Beckett pried herself out of bed to the sound of knocking on her door; slipping on a robe over her sleep shorts and tank she shuffled out of her bedroom to answer it. She was greeted by a Federal Express delivery agent, "Katherine Beckett?"

She hadn't been expecting a delivery, nor had she had any morning coffee yet, so a mumbled response was all he was going get, "Yeah."

"Sign here please." He was holding out a electronic clip board and a document package.

"Sure." She signed, grabbed the package, market with a nondescript Washington DC return address and shuffled back toward her kitchen.

After making herself a cup of coffee, one that had no particular appeal, but contained needed caffeine she headed over to her desk, opening the document envelope and finding, as expected, the official written offer letter and contract from the Attorney General's office. She placed it on her desk, parallel to her NYPD resignation paperwork: her future encapsulated in a few sheet of paper.

Picking up her pen she couldn't help but hesitate, ponder all the things the two sets of documents meant. Hesitation didn't mean anything, that's what she kept telling herself; it just meant she was being thoughtful, it was a good thing. Sign both and her path was laid out before her; sign neither and her future was a gapping black hole of uncertainty. She'd made her decision, told Lanie, told Ryan and Esposito, told Gates, told everyone who would miss her and notice her leaving; but regardless, staring at the paperwork, the pen in her hand made everything so much more real.

Time enough for that later, she put the pen down, sipped her coffee and went back to researching apartments and Metro routes in DC.

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Rick had actually managed quite a restful day so far, only interrupted by an insipid concoction of mashed potatoes, rubber chicken, an ubiquitous green jello. He's glared at Martha the whole time, one of his new recovery nurses had caught them with the remnants of Chinese take-out the night before, and after some rambling about balance diet and bone healing had made Martha promise to keep him on the hospital food from now on. All he knew it could be green jello was suppose to be his treat.

"Kitten!"

Say whatever you want about Meredith, and Rick though he had plenty to say on a lot of topics, but she did know how to make a dramatic entrance. He just wished he could get up and back away as she approached, but no such luck, stuck with two broken legs he had no viable escape routes. She also knew how to look good, though a thigh high scarlet dress and five inch stilettos really didn't seem like a hospital visiting outfit to him. Not that he minded the opportunity to appreciate the view, appreciate the effort she went towards displaying her assets; even though she had a habit of displaying them for all and sundry. Even Gina wouldn't... No Gina. Divorced. Remember!

He finally caught back up to the situation, acknowledging her presence as she bent down to kiss him, he managed to at least turn a little to catch it on his cheek. "Hello Meredith."

"Mom! Please, Dad's hurt, be careful." Alexis at least was right behind her, immediately moving in to wrangle her away from him, even as Martha looked on, rolling her eyes skyward.

"How are you? I came as soon as I could."

Martha spoke up a little dryly, "It's a five hour flight from LA, not three days."

Meredith shot an icy stare at her former mother-in-law, "I was tied up."

"I bet you were." Every indication was that Martha was speaking to herself, but somehow Rick thought that comment sounded a little too loud to be an accidental mumble. Well, they never had gotten on very well before, looks like some things hadn't changed.

Rick interrupted, before things could get out of hand, the last thing he needed was some melodramatic soap opera playing out in his hospital room, "Meredith! Why are you here? We're divorced, remember?"

A third, and his least favorite redhead; seriously what did he do to deserve three redheads at once? She was speaking again, he supposed that he should actually listen, ".. after you and Alexis obviously while your convalescing."

"Mom! Dad doesn't need a baby sitter, I'll be looking after him; I'm sure Kate will help just like when he broke his knee."

Meredith tilted her head, smiling, but tight lipped as she shifted her gaze from her daughter to her former husband, "Alexis dear, I'm sure your dad doesn't was some stranger looking after him. Do you Richard?

"Err. I'm going to be in the hospital for a while longer I think; how long were you planning on staying?"

"As long as you and Alexis need me, Kitten!"

"Mom, I think we should go back to the loft and get your stuff situated ok? We can come back and check on dad later, okay?"

"Sure Alexis, I can freshen up too."

Rick honestly didn't think he could handle another round of Meredith later, plus his new nurses had been very firm about only healthy food, green jello for desert; he presumed Deep Fried Twinkie's were definitely off the menu for his own good. Certainly would be while he was married to Gina, but he wasn't anymore, though he had had a girlfriend, one who apparently didn't have time to see him.

He just really needed some rest, close his eyes and clear his mind, free from all he hubbub of confusion that conversation brought, "Why don't you all go back to the loft? I could do with some real rest, I'll be fine, could do with some quiet. You all could do with some time off from this too."

"Dad! No, I.."

Martha stood up, put a had firmly in Meredith's back guiding her towards the door, "Your father is right Alexis, we could all do with an evening to recharge. We'll all see you tomorrow Richard. Goodnight."

Peace and quiet. Rick lived for the energy of people, company; was always so lonely when he was left by himself for any extended period of time. Usually these alone times were accompanied by writing, where he could lose himself vicariously in the lives of others, their adventures and love lives. They wouldn't let him write yet though, while his hands were functional, no broken fingers at all, both his arms had stress fractures though he'd be incredibly fortunately that neither were damaged worse than that.

He needed to sleep, his head wasn't pounding, but it was definitely throbbing; he'd ask the nurse for something and maybe he'd get a good long night of rest if he turned in early.

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By seven Kate had picked out three potential apartment building candidates, all within a couple of blocks of a Metro station and a few stops away from Federal Triangle. Occasionally through the day she'd glanced over at the paperwork that sat on her desk; it simply stared right back, whispering to her: sign me.

The siren call of a new start, a clean break from her old life, was hard to resist; not that she was resisting she told herself, her decision was made. She had taken the job, she would be moving; she might occasionally see the guys again, was sure she'd be able keep in touch with Lanie, by text message and occasional phone call if nothing else. Maybe she'd still be able to make the occasional Yankee's game with her dad, but honestly she doubted it.

So much to give up, but such a great opportunity to look forward to.

Abruptly she pushed herself back from her desk, feeling a little numb in paces after sitting mesmerized in front of her computer for so long, "I seriously need a drink!"

Talking to herself probably wasn't the best of signs she acknowledged, but it spurred her to action, so all told it couldn't be that bad a thing. Grabbing a full bottle of tequila she poured herself a big glass, no shot glass tonight, it was tumbler time. A stupid movie and a few swigs of alcoholic balm would make the evening fly by and she could return to her worries tomorrow.

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Castle gradually roused from sleep, his name being called and something or someone pushing on his shoulder. When he was finally aware enough to open his eyes he saw yet another unfamiliar doctor looking down at him, smiling with little warmth. Glancing over at he clock he saw it was just after 3 Sunday morning, far too early for him to be awake.

"Castle! Long time no see. How are you man?"

There it was again, someone calling him by his last name, not a detective though, this time, "I'm sorry, do I know you?"

The smile broke into a wider grin, but it appeared no warmer than it had before, like the smile his mother wore on stage sometimes, a mask showing no true feelings, "Yeah Castle we go back, you don't remember me? I heard that you hit your head man. Just wanted to check up on you, see if the rumors were true."

"Yes, I have some memory problems apparently. I don't recall you, I'm sorry. Were we friends?"

"Castle! We were a real pair, had the greatest time together, adventure, hijinks, the works. It's really too bad about your memory. I was looking forward to getting together soon, you know, reliving old times; but if you don't remember me then there's really not going to be much point."

"Well, sorry, what's your name?"

"Just call me Jerry. It's really sad, I was starting to plan this whole thing for us."

"Maybe I'll remember eventually Jerry, how long did I know you?"

"Years Castle, years, and so many more for me to look forward to now; you helped me make a clean start. Tell you what, your memory ever comes back Castle, you makes sure to look me up. I'll plan something special for our reunion okay?"

"Sure Jerry, I'll look forward to it."

Jerry flashed him grin, showing his teeth before he started to leave, "Sorry, I gotta go now, places to be, ladies to meet, you understand. Maybe I'll see you around."

Rick spoke up again, just as Jerry put his hand on the door handle, "Wait! Nobody's telling me anything Jerry, about my missing memories. Stay, tell me about us! I'd like to know our story."

Pulling the door open Jerry started to step through it, to leave, looking over at Castle one last time with a completely blank expression on his face, "No. I like a good twist Castle; a nice surprise. If you remember me, that's what you'll get; I'm going to look forward to that day."

Then Jerry stepped through the door and was gone; leaving Rick with yet more unanswered questions, of who he was and what he didn't remember.