There was a silent agreement between Emily and Spencer that they wouldn't talk about the kiss. The day after the kiss in the classroom, each of the girls went back to their normal routines. Even Aria and Hanna seemed to sense the unspoken agreement of pretending that Emily didn't have feelings for Spencer. It didn't mean the other girls wanted to agree to keep it quiet. Hanna didn't like it one bit. Emily could see her get slightly irritated each time they were all together and there was nothing else that happened.

It wasn't until the car hit Hanna that the agreement was broken.

"Stay the night?" Spencer asked softly after Aria had already driven off. Her arms were crossed. As hard as Spencer had been trying to keep it together, she knew that she wouldn't last much longer. "I don't think I'll be able to sleep alone after what happened." Spencer knew that she could have asked Aria to stay the night or even the both of the girls, but something inside of Spencer just wanted the comfort of Emily. She wanted to be able to sleep and she knew that she'd be able to with Emily by her side.

"Yeah, of course," Emily answered with a quick nod. She didn't have to think twice about it. After everything that had happened that night, she didn't want to be alone either. "Let me just text my mom that I'm staying over."

"Spencer, stop." Emily begged softly as she pulled out the extra pillows from the closet. Spencer had spent the better part of the last 15 minutes checking and rechecking the windows to make sure nobody was outside. "Nothing is going to happen tonight."

"Someone hit Hanna with a car." The reply was sharp and it made Emily flinch visibly. "Sorry," Spencer said with a small sigh. That wasn't what she had meant to say, but snark was one of her main coping mechanisms. "I didn't mean—It's just been a long night." Emily nodded at the apology before she went back and pulled out the spare comforter to set on the floor.

"What are you doing?" Spencer asked with a hint of confusion in her voice.

"I'm just getting ready for bed."

"You're not going to sleep in the bed?" Spencer asked with a slight shake evident in her voice. It stopped Emily's in her tracks. Spencer tried to hide the disappointment in her voice. She thought that had been one of the points of Emily sleeping over. If Emily slept on the floor, Spencer would just spend the night worrying that the other girl wasn't sleeping or she was uncomfortable.

"I didn't think that you'd…" Emily trailed off thinking about the kiss that they had shared only a week prior. Her gaze fell to Spencer's bed before she looked back at the other girl expectantly.

"Well I do."

There was a minute of awkward silence in the bed after the both slid beneath the blankets. Emily knew she shouldn't be uncomfortable; she had slept in Spencer's bed numerous times before. It was different now though. Her heart was beating fast in her chest just at the near proximity to Spencer. Emily took quiet deep breaths to try and relax her heartbeat to be able to fall asleep. She had only started to relax when she could hear the quieted sniffling of Spencer. "Spence?" she asked concerned as she turned around in the bed to be able to face the other girl.

"I'm fine… I'm fine," Spencer lied as she tried to turn her face away from Emily's gaze. Hopefully in the dark Emily wouldn't be able to see the tears that were slowly making their way down her face.

"Stop, it's okay," Emily said. "You can cry; it's okay." The reassuring words only broke Spencer's resistance and she could feel the tears run faster down her face. "She's going to be okay, Spencer. Hanna's is going to be fine." Before Emily could say anything else, Spencer had slid across the space between them in the bed and begun to awkwardly try to curl into Emily's body. "Spencer," Emily said as she sat up in the bed and coaxed Spencer into a more comfortable embrace. "It's fine. You're fine. Hanna's fine. Shhh." Emily wasn't used to being the reassuring one in their friendship. Usually it was Spencer that was the "strong" one. Usually it was Spencer that kept it all together and could see the logical side of things. Emily knew that she had to step it up and be the one that Spencer could rely on. The other girl needed her. Wasn't that what Emily had wanted all along? It felt a lot worse than she had ever expected it to.

"Em."

Spencer sounded so broken and fragile. Emily couldn't help but try and soothe her more. Her shushes and whispers of comfort increased. Emily pressed kisses against Spencer's head as her hands rubbed soothing circles against Spencer's back. "I can't stand to see you like this." The whispered confession seemed to snap Spencer out of her need for comfort and back into thinking clearer. Spencer wanted to kick herself for being so selfish when Emily had gone through the same thing that she had. If anything, Emily and Hanna were closer than Hanna and Spencer. She should have been the one to comfort Emily, but instead she had allowed herself to be selfish and weak. Spencer pulled away slowly from the embrace. She could feel the blush rising from her chest as she realized how vulnerable she had been.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have-"

"Don't apologize" Emily whispered as she reached to wipe the tears off Spencer's face. The moonlight lit the strong features of Spencer's face. Her sharp jawline and curve of her cheekbones were only highlighted in the small light that came in from the windows. Within a moment, Emily's heart swelled in her chest. She could hear her heartbeat and was almost positive that Spencer could hear it as well. Her thumb trailed softly against Spencer's cheekbone as her fingers spread slightly against her jaw. "Spence." Emily needed Spencer to stop her. Her eyes were staring at Spencer's slightly opened lips. She could imagine exactly how they felt and, oh god, she wanted to feel them against her own lips once again.

Spencer shook lightly as she took a deep breath in. She didn't know if it was because it was late or that she had just cried, but her inhibitions had fallen away. The walls that Spencer kept up had fallen away for the night and she wouldn't deny herself the comfort in Emily's embrace. She leaned into Emily's touch, her eyes closing for a moment as she let herself be lulled by Emily's soft caresses of her face.

It might have been the most relaxed, genuine version of Spencer Hastings that Emily had ever seen. This wasn't a side that Emily had seen in more than glimpses before. Spencer was leaning into her touch and Emily could feel the shift in the room. This was no longer just for comfort; there were stronger emotions at play.

"Tell me to stop," Emily begged again. "If you don't want… tell me to stop."

But Spencer didn't want Emily to stop. Instead her hands moved to cup Emily's face slowly as she took in the other girl. "I can't do that," she said quietly as her eyes glanced around Emily's face. She could see the soft curve of her cheek and feel the softness of her skin under her fingertips. It was different than just seeing Emily from afar or even up close as a friend. This was taking in the other girl. Spencer was absolutely inhaling the other girl. It was different than anything Spencer had ever experienced before. Even with Ian, Wren and Alex, she had never felt this intensity, this level of intimacy and they hadn't even kissed yet.

Spencer's breath begin to intertwine with her Emily's and Emily knew the battle had been lost. Her eyes flickered from Spencer's eyes to her lips. She licked her lips slightly before she leaned to kiss Spencer. Spencer's lips connected with hers before she could close the distance between them. It wasn't just a soft kiss like before in the library. No, this was far different. Within moments, Spencer's hands were no longer lingering gently on her face. Now one hand had begun to twist in her hair and the other holding on her neck. It felt like a dream to Emily. Not only was she kissing Spencer, no, Spencer was kissing her back. It wasn't just in pity or how it had been in the library; there was a certain need to Spencer's kiss. Emily felt more than wanted; it was almost that Spencer needed to be kissing Emily. She wouldn't allow herself to forget this moment.

Kissing Spencer was completely different than kissing Maya. It wasn't as awkward and she didn't feel the need to impress Spencer in the way she did Maya. She didn't have to hide anything from Spencer. In the moment, she didn't feel the need to hold back. Instead, Emily was able to speak through her lips and it let her just be.

It was moments later that Emily finally pulled away from the kiss. Breathing was difficult as she took the other girl in. Even in the darkness, Emily had never seen Spencer look as beautiful. She could see the fast rise and fall in Spencer's chest. It wasn't only her that was having difficult breathing. Spencer's hair was messed slightly. Emily could feel the other girl's hand still twirling within her hair. None of it was uncomfortable and Emily was flushed with all the emotions that had ran through her body in the small course of time. Her heart beat furiously in her chest as she felt a new rush of emotion. It was different from the comfort and arousal that came with kissing Spencer. This was something fully genuine and kissing Spencer had just intensified the feeling even more. "I love you." Her eyes were wide in the night as the words slipped out of her mouth of their own accord. She felt Spencer tense underneath her hands at the words and she mentally kicked herself for saying it.

It was true, but it was obviously not what Spencer had wanted to hear.

"Don't say that, Em," Spencer begged softly. She could feel the tears starting to rise to the surface. "Just don't say that. I can't."

The thought of being loved by Emily absolutely terrified Spencer. The emotion and honesty in those words had terrified Spencer. Everything could change. If those words were true, everything would change. If she allowed herself to love Emily back… no. She didn't feel that way. This was just out of comfort. The more she thought about it, the harder she had to work to convince herself that her feelings for Emily were only of friendship. If they talked about kissing, then Spencer would have to face it and she didn't think she could.

The desperate sound in Spencer's voice made Emily want to cry. Instead she just pressed her mouth against Spencer's again. This time it was desperate; it was an apology. No matter how silly it sounded, Emily knew she was kissing Spencer as an apology for loving her.

"It's okay. I'm sorry, just forget it," Emily said softly before attaching her lips against Spencer's again. She could feel Spencer tremble beneath her hands and she wished she could take what she said back. Spencer's hands had lost their grip against Emily. It was in that moment that Emily knew that she wouldn't get the moments back and the mood had switched for the night. There was a moment of silence after Spencer pulled back from the kiss. Emily was terrified that what she had said would be the ultimate downfall of their friendship.

"I can't lose you." Spencer's hands trailed back down Emily's sides and wrapped around her back. Her face buried in Emily's neck as she felt the hot tears reappear in her eyes. "I almost lost Han… I can't lose you. I'm sorry."

"You won't. I promise."

"And then you guys just slept?" Hanna asked. "God, it was just getting good and you just went to bed?"

"Hanna," Emily said shaking her head as she leaned against the hospital bed that she laid in with Hanna. She needed someone to talk to and after both the other girls had left, it was easy to spill her guts to Hanna about everything that had happened the night before.

"Fine, right," Hanna said before turning to face Emily more in the bed. "Should I be insulted that instead of staying here all night, the two of you almost hooked up—"

"We did not almost hook up."

"Almost hooked up," Hanna repeated with a slight smirk on her face. "Or should I feel honored that I did a part in helping you get kissed? I mean, I know I'm important and everything, but damn. I never thought that me getting hit by a car would have an upside."

Hanna could sense the shift in the emotions in the room as she said that. Her eyes kept locked on Emily as she saw the other girl sink down further into the bed. "Are you going to tell me what's really the matter or should I just keep going?" Hanna asked with a slight tilt of her head.

"It's just…" Emily sighed. Her fingers began to fumble with the bed sheet as she allowed herself to think what she really needed to say. "She kissed me. And I know she felt something, but then she pulled away."

"Em."

"It's not just that, Hanna. I'm seeing Maya now and I like her and-"

"And you can't really be with Maya while you still like Spencer, right?" Hanna finished the sentence for Emily. Emily could only nod shyly. Goodness, how pathetic did she seem right then? Here Hanna was lying in a hospital bed after being hit by a car and Emily was the one complaining about her love life.

"On the bright side, at least you're not the one seeing our English teacher?" Hanna joked trying to lighten the situation.

"Yeah, but at least Aria knows what she wants," Emily shrugged as her head lulled back to rest against the wall. "Who she wants."

Hanna could only sigh at Emily's words. It hurt her to see her best friend in so much pain. The fact that the pain was caused by Hanna's other best friend only made it worse. There wasn't anything Hanna could say that would make it better. Her jokes hadn't worked. Instead, she just laid her head against Emily's shoulder and just let herself be there for Emily.

Deep in Emily's gut, she knew that she couldn't hide who she was anymore. Even for Spencer.