A/N: ahhh! so i finally figured out a direction with this story. i needed to actually sit and plan it out, which i've done. that always makes it easier for me to write. so this is based on 3x01 going forward. there'll be flashbacks and such to season 2. :) the reviews are wonderful and helped me realize that i'm better at writing angst and enjoy writing it so much more than just happiness. keep the reviews coming.

She had gotten so excited when it was finally the day for Emily to come home from Haiti. She wouldn't have missed getting to go with Pam to the airport to pick up the other girl.

Spencer knew she was probably more excited than Pam for Emily to be home. It had been nearly three months since she had seen her girlfriend last.

She had been the one that had originally found the program for Emily. It had been her push that got Emily to decide to leave for the summer. Spencer hadn't wanted Emily to leave, but she knew it was the best thing for the other girl. After Maya's death… their relationship had changed. Spencer knew that Emily still loved Maya before, but after the girl's death, Spencer saw that Emily's feelings for the girl hadn't changed that much since they started dating. There was just a gut feeling that something else had gone on with Maya and Emily, but Spencer hadn't questioned it. How could she when her girlfriend was devastated?

All Spencer had done was try to be supportive through it.

Building house in Haiti had seemed like such an Emily thing to do, that it only took a few pushes from Spencer and her parents for Emily to agree to do it. Spencer didn't know how it had gone, but all she could hope for was her girlfriend coming back happier than she had left.

"She had to go through customs, Spencer," Pam reassured. Spencer knew that everyone in the airport could probably see how excited she was. Pam's hand gripped her arm lightly as Spencer took a deep breath. Other than school, Spencer got out to see Pam and that was it. They had bonded over the summer. It had started with Spencer making sure Pam was all right (per Emily's request when she left), but it ended in Pam becoming someone Spencer could talk to. Spencer felt close to Emily when she was with Pam. It was the most of the other girl she could get. Emily talked to Pam all the time and Spencer tried to stop her heart from aching so much because of it. She had barely spoken to Emily since she left. It wasn't for a lack of trying. Instead, Spencer did what she did best and threw herself into schoolwork. If she kept herself busy, then she wouldn't miss Emily as much.

It had worked for a while, but it hadn't been able to take away all the pain.

Spencer didn't think she could stand to wait another second by the time people started coming through the exit of customs. She knew Pam was trying to stay calm to off set Spencer's excited nature, but she was just as excited to see her daughter.

A wide smile broke out on her face as she finally spotted Emily. She suppressed the urge to wave or yell out for the other girl. Emily was still too far away to do anything if Spencer did that. It was only once Emily was coming down the escalator that Spencer allowed herself to wave, following Pam's example. Emily was smiling as she saw them, but Spencer could see that Emily wasn't as excited as she was. She was probably over thinking the entire thing and pushed everything but happiness out of her mind.

Emily hugged Pam first and Spencer waited impatiently for her turn. But when Emily's gaze finally landed on her, Spencer suddenly felt shy. Spencer didn't want to make the first move. It had been three months with nearly no contact and Spencer didn't know how Emily felt.

"Spence," Emily whispered out before there were arms around Spencer's neck and Spencer stepped closer to return the tight hug. Spencer finally felt able to breathe again when Emily's arms wrapped around her. Spencer needed the closeness. She needed to remember what it meant to actually be with Emily. Emily seemed like a distant memory all summer. All Spencer wanted to do was make up for lost time and remember what Emily felt like against her skin. "I missed you."

The words were all Spencer needed to hear and she felt tears of happiness prick at her eyes. "I missed you too, Em."

Once Emily pulled away slightly, Spencer's lips had dropped to stare at Emily's lips. She wanted so badly to kiss the other girl, but she didn't want to make the first move. It was Emily who moved in slowly to kiss Spencer first. It seemed like hours before Emily's lips were finally pressed against her own. Spencer brought her hands up to cup the other girl's face. She wanted to touch Emily. The other girl's hands were gripping against her back and Spencer felt wanted. She could feel that Emily wanted her. It had been too long since Emily had really kissed Spencer. The short kiss they had before Emily had left for the summer didn't count in Spencer's mind.

Pam interrupted the kiss with a small cough. "I'm going to wait for you luggage, okay?" she asked and Emily pulled away for a moment to just nod at her mother.

Spencer didn't know what had shifted, but Emily's eyes flickered to the side for a moment, as if she expected someone else to be there. It shouldn't have caused hurt inside of Spencer, but something stung inside of her. Spencer forced a smile on her face as Emily turned back to look at her.

"Hanna and Aria are so excited for our sleepover tonight," Spencer commented softly as her gaze flickered around Emily's face. Emily still was the most gorgeous girl who Spencer had ever seen. The time away from each other only reminded Spencer of that fact.

The smile faded from Spencer's face as Emily looked away. "We should go find my mom," Emily commented and Spencer just nodded in response.

It wasn't the welcome home reaction she had looked for. It was as if once Emily stopped kissing her, she remembered everything that had happened and closed up again. Spencer could tell that Haiti hadn't been the answer to all of their problems. Everything that was wrong in their relationship couldn't be solved with time apart. Spencer felt stupid for believing otherwise.

Emily was still hurting and Spencer couldn't do anything about that.

"Earth to Spencer. Are you going to help me or not?"

Hanna's voice pulled Spencer back from her train of thought as she looked out her window. Her hand grasped the fabric over her chest as she had let her thoughts get away with her. All the worries she had worked so hard to push away had returned with Emily. "Sorry," Spencer mumbled as she slowly turned to face Hanna.

Hanna knew there was something wrong with Spencer. It didn't take a genius to realize that the other girl was hurting. Hanna had barely seen Spencer all summer. Spencer had locked herself in her room and with school.

It wasn't just Emily that had been heart-broken during the summer.

"Are you finally going to talk to me or we still pretending the everything's fine?"

"Everything is fine," Spencer responded. She had stayed away from the girls for this exact reason. Spencer wasn't sure what she was feeling all the time. And what she did feel wasn't exactly selfless and loving like the girlfriend she wanted to be would feel. Hanna was the most blunt and Spencer wished that Aria were there to offset Hanna. She knew she had given Hanna the perfect opportunity to drill her about everything that had happened in the past few months.

"Well, tell that to your face."

"What do you want me to say, Hanna?"

Hanna would take anything. She'd take anything Spencer had to say that was real. Holding it all in couldn't be good for the other girl. Spencer was already wound up tighter than a clock, or whatever the saying was.

"Do you want me to talk about how my girlfriend barely talked to me for the past three months?" Spencer's voice dripped with hurt and Hanna moved towards Spencer. Spencer's shell was cracking and Hanna knew that the other girl needed someone to be there for her. Spencer didn't have to be the strong one all the time like she had been for the past few months. There were people she could lean on. Hanna wanted to help Spencer as well as helping Emily. They were both important to her.

"Hey, sorry I'm early—" Hanna sighed as Aria made her entrance in the room. Hanna was finally getting somewhere with Spencer and then Aria had to walk in. Hanna was just thankful that Aria stopped talking when she did. It was obvious that Spencer wasn't okay. Spencer had quickly turned back around and wiped at her eyes just to make sure that no tears had fallen when Aria had walked in. "Spence…" Aria muttered as she looked to Hanna for help. Aria worded "sorry" to Hanna who just shrugged her shoulders.

"I was just saying I am fine."

"No you weren't, Spence," Hanna said with a sigh as she sat down heavily on Spencer's bed. "Aria's not stupid. She knows something's wrong too."

"Come on, Spence," Aria urged as she sat down on the bed next to Hanna. "We're team Sparia."

"Wow, that's not hurtful or anything," Hanna said with a pout. "Why don't we get a nickname? Who even came up with… ow!" Hanna whispered as Aria smacked her thigh lightly as a reminder that they weren't there to argue about names.

Spencer felt her walls begin to fall again with the two of them bantered. Spencer didn't know why she was so reluctant to talk to the girls. She just didn't want to talk poorly about Emily. They were all best friends long before Spencer and Emily had gotten together. Spencer just didn't want to do anything that could hurt Emily in the long run. Spencer had tried for so long to be there for Emily, but it had become nearly impossible to do it anymore. It took a moment, but Spencer eventually moved to the bed.

Aria and Hanna—her girls—just looked at her with so much concern that Spencer didn't want to hide anything from them anymore. She had hidden out away for the entire summer and it hadn't done her any good in the long run. Maybe they would be able to say something to Spencer that would rebound her from this sadness she had found herself drowning in.

"I just…" Spencer muttered as she sat down in the bed in between the two girls. She crossed her legs underneath herself as she tried to get comfortable. She was never fully comfortable when she was being fully honest with anyone. "I thought that this summer, I thought that time away would be good for her. Maybe it was, but we only talked a few times over the summer." Spencer took a shaky breath as she finally thought about everything that had happened. It affected her more than she would have liked to think it would. Her eyes shut as she thought of the words to say. She felt Hanna's hand on her back and Spencer relaxed slightly. There wasn't any judgment between the three girls. "I wrote her letters and even sent her a stupid care package and I got nothing in response."

"Spence," Aria's voice interrupts. It pains Aria to see Spencer so upset. If it had been anyone other than Emily, Aria would have offered to beat him or her up, but she knew that there was so much more to the story. "It wasn't stupid. I'm sure she loved it."

"And it's selfish and petty, but Emily's my girlfriend. I know she's mourning and I'm trying to be respectful, but I don't even feel like I mean anything to her anymore."

It hurt to finally admit her feelings aloud. When the words were finally said, Spencer knew that she couldn't take back them. She couldn't fool herself anymore and pretend that everything was fine.

Everything wasn't fine. It was all screwed up.

"That's not true," Hanna argued as she rubbed Spencer's back subconsciously as she scooted closer to the girl. It had been obvious that Spencer hadn't been okay since Maya had died, but they had all been too preoccupied in making sure that Emily was all right. Hanna felt a sense of guilt knowing that she hadn't been there for her best friend. Hanna was determined to change that. Spencer wouldn't have to go through this alone anymore.

"Spencer," Aria chipped in. Her hands moved to grip one of Spencer's tightly. "Emily loves you. She's just hurting right now." It was a sorry excuse, but there wasn't anything else Aria could claim. The other girl was obviously hurting and Aria didn't know what advice to give to Spencer. "But we're here for you too, Spence. You don't have to hide away in your room and hurt by yourself."

"Hello?"

The voice of Emily interrupted from down the stairs and Spencer quickly rose from the bed. There were tears on her face and she knew she had to clean up a bit before Emily saw her. "Promise you won't say anything?" Spencer pleaded as she stared at the other two girls.

Aria nodded first. It had been Hanna that she mostly wanted to promise. Aria could keep a secret. Hanna could as well, if she wanted to.

Spencer's arm was wrapped around Emily's back as she slowly led Emily in from the car. Aria and Hanna were going to bury the shovel and Spencer had to make sure that Emily was okay. The other girl was still coming down from some sort of drunken high. Spencer had cursed herself enough for letting Emily get out of the house without even knowing. She should have taken better care of her. Spencer had been coming up with a plan since the moment they got to the graveyard. She wouldn't let any more police officers into her life. She didn't have the energy to be questioned anymore. Spencer knew that the other girls couldn't handle it either.

"I'm not your child," Emily snapped as Spencer just gripped her harder. Emily had barely been able to stand at the graveyard and Spencer wasn't going to let the other girl go until she could make Emily sit on the couch. "I can walk by myself."

Drunken Emily was not someone who Spencer liked. She had lashed out when she was drunk during the dance, but this time it was more painful. Spencer didn't know if she was ready for Emily's painfully honest drunken confessions. "Just hold on," Spencer muttered as she used her key to open the door to her kitchen. Emily had tried to escape her grasp, but she wasn't strong or steady enough to do it. There was a pout on Emily's face and in any other circumstance Spencer would have found it adorable, but she didn't have time to think about anything but making sure none of this could be blamed on them.

It took one shift of Emily and Spencer stumbled against the door, pulling Emily tight against her in the process. Spencer took a deep breath as she tried to regain her composure as Emily pressed firmly against her. "Em," Spencer whispered after a moment. It was clear that Emily wasn't moving and Spencer couldn't move unless the other girl did. "You need to move."

"What if I don't want to?" Emily mumbled as she leaned forward and captured Spencer's lips with her own.

The kiss was too rough and reminded Spencer of everything that was wrong between the two of them. Emily's hands were greedy against her hips and Spencer knew that she shouldn't be kissing Emily like this, but part of her wanted to take whatever she could from the other girl. The girl's grip on Spencer's hips kept her pressed up tightly against Emily. Her hands stayed idly on the door. Emily didn't seem to notice. Instead, her hands made their way underneath Spencer's shirt and just the contact made a moan escape from Spencer's lips. She would be lying if she said she didn't want Emily to touch her. She wanted the girl to be like this when she was sober. It shouldn't have to take alcohol for Emily to want to touch her.

It took most of her self-control to push Emily away. "No, Em," Spencer said with a sad shake of her head. "Not like this."

There was hurt in Emily's eyes when she pulled away.

Spencer wasn't a play toy. She didn't want to be used anymore.

"I really let my friends down. I really let Spencer down."

Emily didn't feel like she had been this honest in months. Emily could feel the tears pooling in her eyes as she looked up for a moment. She had done enough crying in the past few months for a lifetime. Emily didn't know why it was so easy to talk to Toby about all of this, but she was barely able to talk to her friends about how she felt.

"You know how Spencer and the girls feel about you."

Emily did know. She knew that the girls would be there for her no matter what, but after the way she had acted for the summer, she didn't know if she even deserved it anymore. Emily hadn't been there for them at all. She knew she was in a downward spiral, but she wouldn't allow herself to bring any of the girls down with her.

"Yeah, but they're like my family. That's why I can't stand to disappoint them."

"That's what's so great about friends... they're not your family. They accept you for who you are," Toby said with a smile. Toby was right. The girls were still there even after all she did. They hadn't left her through any of the heartache or pain. Spencer hadn't left her either. Emily smiled a bit in response as she took a deep breath. She wouldn't let herself get wrapped up in the grief.

"Did you see a lot of Spencer this summer?" Emily wasn't the one who had the smile slip from her face this time. Toby was so open about his feelings. She could see that he was concerned before he had even said anything. It didn't surprise Emily that Toby hadn't been mad about his and Spencer's break up when the girls originally got together, but it did surprise her of how close the two of them gotten because of it. Toby might have become an even bigger part of Spencer's life once they were just friends. If anyone were to know how Spencer had done during the summer, it would be Toby. Emily had talked to her mom briefly about how Spencer had come over almost once a week. Pam had gushed about how wonderful Spencer was, but Emily knew that there was something adrift about the other girl.

"Just a few times," Toby said with a sigh. "Have you two actually talked since you got back?"

Emily looked down at her coffee slightly embarrassed at what her answer was. Emily had barely seen Spencer other than with the other girls. Emily hadn't meant to avoid her, but it was easier to just not talk to her right then. She wasn't sure that she was ready to talk about everything.

"You need to talk to her, Em. She's hurting too," Toby said and Emily felt her defensive rise in response.

"She didn't lose someone like I did." Emily didn't mean to lash out at Toby, but it had become what she did in these situations. She used her anger as a blockage from seeing the hurt.

"Are you sure about that?"

What did a question like that even mean? Spencer hadn't lost someone who died like she had. Why should Spencer be hurting? There was nothing compared to what she felt after Maya's death. Maya was her first real love. She was the first girl who loved her back, the first girl who Emily had slept with. Spencer hadn't lost someone like that.

Emily couldn't see through the fog of her pain to think of anything that Spencer had lost that could even compare to her pain.

"Spencer?" Hanna asked after Spencer had opened her phone. There was a look of shock on the other girl's face and Hanna knew that it couldn't be anything good. "What was that?"

Spencer shook her head quickly like she couldn't believe what she had seen and it only made Hanna more curious to what it could be. Spencer hadn't wanted to spend the night alone, so Hanna had agreed to a sleepover at her house. Aria and Emily were long gone by the time Spencer had gotten the text message.

"Its nothing," Spencer responded after a moment too long of silence.

"That's not a 'nothing' look, Spencer. That's an "A" face. What is it?" Hanna asked as she reached over to grab Spencer's phone out of her hands. Hanna hadn't expected for Spencer to give her the phone so easily. There wasn't a fight or anything, Spencer had just handed the phone over to Hanna. It had to be something important because Spencer wouldn't have done that with something she was interested in hiding.

I still know everything. – A

It wasn't the message that shocked Hanna, but rather the photo. All of them had photos taken through their windows, but once Mona was locked up, none of them expected for the photos to continue. It was obvious that this new person had the same information that Mona had. Hanna didn't know what she had expected on the phone, but she definitely hadn't been expecting a picture of Emily kissing Maya to pop up.

"It's just a picture of Maya and Emily from before. It's probably just one of the photos that Mona had saved when she was still conscious."

"It's not," Spencer replied softly and Hanna finally shifted her gaze back from the phone to Spencer's face. There was such hurt on the other girl's face that it actually pained Hanna to look at her. It wasn't all pain though. There was an understanding look on her face as well.

"How do you know that though?" Hanna asked. She didn't want to believe that Emily would kiss Maya while Spencer and her had been together. This had to be a picture from before. "You can barely even see them in the photo.

"I got Emily that shirt," Spencer said softly. She had gotten Emily that shirt well after they had started dating. There wasn't any way that the photo could have been taken from before. Spencer didn't want to cry in front of Hanna. She didn't want to cry at all. It all made sense now. Everything about why Emily was so devastated made so much more sense.

A kiss always meant something.

It wasn't that Emily had been in love with Maya a long time ago; it was Emily had been in love with Maya when she died.

Spencer didn't realize that she was crying until Hanna's arms were wrapped around her tightly. She knew that the other girl was trying to comfort her, but Spencer wasn't upset about the kiss. The tears weren't out of sorrow. They were out of the reality of the situation. Spencer was crying because it was over.

All of her fears were coming true and it killed her.

It would have been too much to have the conversation in Spencer's bedroom. It was better to do it in the living room. There had been too many good memories in the bedroom to ruin it because of all this. The memories were surely all that Spencer would have left. Emily had been concerned when she had gotten over to Spencer's house. Spencer was supposed to sleep over at Hanna's.

"Why didn't you call me when you were away?" Spencer asked even though she hated feeling so weak in front of the other girl. It was hard to get the words out. Spencer didn't want to be selfish, but after that photo… she had to know. Spencer had to understand what had happened. The time to let it slip had long past. She hadn't been the clingy girlfriend, but now her thirst for knowledge overtook her supportive nature. There were too many clues and things that needed to be answer. Spencer wouldn't stand back and let it all pass anymore. The questions needed answers. "Don't you tell me that you didn't have a phone available, because you called your mom every other day."

There was no reply and Spencer didn't know how to take it. Emily was staring at her hands and Spencer didn't feel the want to comfort her like she normally did. Spencer crossed her arms in front of herself in a defensive way. She wished that this all didn't make her so upset, but it did. When Emily didn't respond for another few moments, Spencer decided that she needed the other girl to say something.

"Why didn't you tell me about the kiss?"

It had gotten Emily's attention from her hands and to look at Spencer. There was confusion in her glance and it made Spencer mad. How could Emily not know what Spencer was talking about?

"What kiss?" Emily asked. She could feel her heart race as she thought of what kiss Spencer meant. Spencer couldn't possibly know about Maya kissing her before… before all of this happened.

Spencer took a deep breath before she handed Emily her phone. She hadn't been able to close the picture off her screen. She had tried so hard to believe that it wasn't true, but the more she looked at the picture, the more she realized the reality of it all.

Emily didn't need to see the picture for more than a second before she looked back up at Spencer.

"Spencer," Emily spoke softly and Spencer knew that it was true. Even with the picture and everything, it took just the look to seal it as fact. It was true and Spencer couldn't beg for an explanation of the photo or anything like that. "I'm so sorry."

The words tore into Spencer and she had to turn away to compose herself. There was such a breach of trust and Spencer didn't know what to do. The memories of her kissing Ian and then Wren when Melissa was with them came flooding back. It wasn't only hurt that Spencer felt. She had been in Emily's shoes, but she had never been in the shoes of someone who had been cheated on. Spencer suddenly felt so much guilt for kissing Ian and Wren. She had seen how much it had hurt Melissa, but now that she was feeling the hurt, it was so much worse than she thought it would be. Her eyes were shut tightly as she willed herself not to cry. The reality of the situation was hitting her hard in the face after all the months. She wished she would have known sooner. Spencer had felt so bad about needing Emily for so long, but now she realized why Emily had pushed her away. It made so much more sense.

It didn't mean that it hurt any less.

"Spencer, please," Emily begged. This hadn't been how she wanted this all to happen. She was going to tell Spencer about the kiss and then Maya was dead. She hadn't been able to think about anything but the death. "Please look at me."

Spencer quickly reached up and wiped the tears off her face before she turned back around to hear what Emily had to say about the kiss. Her arms were still folded defensively in front of her. There weren't many times that rendered Spencer speechless, but this was one of them. She didn't know what to say to Emily.

"That kiss… I pushed Maya away after it," Emily said. It was the truth. Emily had told Maya that she was with Spencer and that she loved Spencer. "I didn't think the kiss meant anything to me."

"So it did mean something."

Emily hadn't realized what she had said. Emily hadn't thought it meant anything. In the moment, it seemed stupid and nothing to even bring up to Spencer. But then Maya was dead. All of her memories of Maya had come back and it hit her hard in the face that she had loved Maya. It made her realize that she had leaned into the kiss. She remembered the feeling for just a moment of wanting to keep kissing Maya. Emily had remembered how much she had loved Maya as well. There were too many emotions and feelings.

"Spence…" Emily muttered. She didn't know what else to say either.

A strange silence had fallen between the two of them. Emily didn't have any excuses. It had happened. She just hadn't wanted Spencer to find out that way.

Spencer was caught up in the silence. There were no excuses, no logic behind this all. Spencer had been hurt for too long. They were stuck and Spencer didn't want to be in this place anymore. She knew once she started to speak, it would all be over. There was so much hurt and she hadn't even said anything yet. Spencer had searched so long for hope, but there was none that she could find.

"No, it's okay," Spencer said even thought it definitely wasn't okay. It was the exact opposite of okay, but she had come to a resolution in her mind. Spencer had needed to plan. She had to figure out what to do in this situation.

It had to be over.

They had to be over.

Spencer moved slowly and sat on the couch next to Emily. She couldn't look at her yet. She didn't want to see the pain in the other girl's eyes. It would cause her to go back to before. Spencer didn't want to go back to hurting. The only way out she could see was to stop being with her. Her hands stayed awkwardly on her lap as she tried to build up the courage.

"I'm sorry," Emily repeated and Spencer closed her eyes tightly. It killed her that she couldn't believe the other girl. Hurt raced through her body as Emily's hands grasped her own. Spencer knew that Emily was trying, but it wasn't enough anymore. Spencer had bent far too much.

"I think we should stop," Spencer exhaled. She could feel Emily's hands grip tighter onto hers. "We should go back to being friends." It wasn't until the second sentence that she finally made eye contact again with the other girl. There was confusion in the girl's eyes, but Spencer knew this needed to be done. Not just for herself, but for Emily as well. Neither of them was happy anymore. Spencer had tried so hard to make it work, but it wasn't working.

They were just hurting each other.

"I didn't mean for it to happen, Spencer. You have to believe me," Emily said with her eyes wide. She could feel the tears coming. "Please, I love you. Don't do this."

"It's time to face the truth. We haven't really been together for a long time now, Em."

The nickname rolled off her tongue easily. The emotion was thick in her voice. She knew she was crying, but Spencer had to keep going. Even if Emily cried as well, this was what was for the best. It was time for them both to face the facts. Emily was obviously not happy with Spencer and Spencer had to let the other girl go. She couldn't keep fighting for this relationship.

They had to go back to being just friends. Maybe this wasn't meant to happen. Spencer had tried for so long, but nothing she did seemed to be enough. Friends were better. She could be just friends with Emily.

"Please, don't do this."

No, don't leave me. Please don't leave me.

"We can't keep pretending that everything is alright, because it's not. It's not supposed to be this hard, Emily. When we started… It wasn't this hard before."

Fight for me. Just try.

Spencer just needed a reason to stay, but it was clearer that Emily wasn't ready for this relationship. There was no fight to Emily's arguments. Spencer wanted to be the one pleading for Emily to want to be with her, but she had to be the strong one. It killed her that Emily wasn't fighting for her.

"I'm so sorry. Please don't be mad, Spence."

"I'm not mad, " Spencer whispered. Her voice was thick with emotions that she was trying to contain inside of her. Spencer wasn't mad at Emily; she was mad at herself for not realizing it earlier. She was hurt that the other girl had never called her or told her about the kiss. Spencer felt Emily looked so lost and Spencer knew that she couldn't be the answer, not now. Emily had to decide what she wanted and Spencer wouldn't allow herself to keep getting hurt over it. "I still care about you, Em. That isn't ever going to change."

Emily's arms were suddenly around her neck and Spencer could feel the sob rise in her chest. The embrace was tight and it said everything Emily hadn't.

It was an apology.

They had been over for a while. Spencer had just been brave enough to say it. Emily wasn't ready for a relationship anymore. Spencer had tried so hard, but it wasn't enough.

"I love you," Emily whispered again against Spencer's neck. Spencer could only nod in response.

Love wasn't always enough.