Revision notice: I think I'm going to be rewriting chapters forever. This is about the third revision for this chapter.
Tossing and turning feverishly, Lily Potter awoke with cold sweat dripping from her forehead right onto the pillow her head rested on. Her eyes were a flutter and she woken with her right hand grasping tightly at her wand. She drew her wand to her face and peered at it curiously, sitting up as she did, pondering what kind of dream would make her physically grab her wand. Lily fiddled with the wand between her fingers, and though, try as she might, failed to draw up any memories.
A hand touched Lily's left hand that rested on the bed and she realized she was not alone in her thoughts. James was looking at her with a rather distressed face.
"Its not enough that Voldermort plagues our waking thoughts, has he invaded your dreams too?" He asked putting his hand to her face.
Lily paled at the mention of the monster. There was a part of her that was glad she could not recall the dream, knowing the cold-blooded snake probably played a big role. There was another part of her that told her she's had this dream not just once before, but five times before, and all one night after the next. This dream seemed to occur to wake her almost always around the same time too, as if trying to warn her, purposely playing over and over, as if hoping this time; she would wake up and remember.
"Did I say anything?" she asked as she put her wand aside to hold onto his hand.
It was nice to feel the warmth of his hand. She had been feeling so cold lately. She realized at this time how shaky her hand had been, and how cold she actually felt. Her husband bowed his head down not letting her see his face as he told her the words, which had spilled from her mouth.
"No.. not Harry."
At the mention of those words the gates opened and the memories flooded in. She met his eyes again, and without a word, the both of them burst from the bed, up the stairs and down the hall towards the nursery.
As they ran, the dream began to play with every other step and blink she took. There wasn't much a difference from her dream and what she was doing, and yet she knew, she was experiencing both simultaneously. In one blink, she would be turning the corner to the main hallway to the nursery, in another blink, she did the same but in the dream, the halls seem to curl in an attempt to trap her, shadows crept and attempted to trip her by her feet, grasp at her nightgown. The closer she got to the room, the more realistic her dream had become and the more dreamlike reality became to her. She dreamed approaching the room with her wand gripped tightly to her sweating hand, turning the knob, and discovering the room to be locked …
The dream blew open into a waking nightmare, as she blew the door the pieces with her wand and found herself horror stricken to find Voldermort in all his glory holding her baby Harry by the ankle. Behind them, a chilling draft of cool autumn air blew in from a large hole where the window and most of a wall used to be. Stephen, still in the crib was screaming shrilly having been injured. There was a nasty cut just above eye, which had split his brow in two.
But none of that mattered right now to Lily… with her focus lying only with Harry, and how no cries where coming from him. His body hung motionless, lifeless. And yet, she had hope that he was still alive. Her heart reached out to him with her arm..
"Wake up, Harry. Wake up." Her heart whispered.
Those words from her heart were never answered by Harry, instead, it was Voldermort who turned to face her, and so did Harry's limp body. Her heart dropped and her skin grew cold when she saw the new mark for which the Dark Lord was so well known for marring the forehead of her baby. The bright green, newly shaped lighting scar sealed any hopes for a baby Harry ever waking up again.
Voldermort laughed when he saw her face fall, and opened the hand which held the baby. The body dropped and fell, and as she dropped down to catch Harry, the dark lord fled into the night air.
"No!" She called out as her baby fell head first onto the carpet of the nursery, " Not Harry… " she moaned.
There was a loud crack as the head touched the ground and was pushed hard to a sharp angle by the body that was attached. She fell on her knees and stared blankly at her dear baby boy who would never wake again.
"Lily, Lily!"
She turned, and found her husband shaking at her by the shoulders. One blink. Two blinks. Realization hit with her shock fading as she found herself outside the boys nursery with her hand to the door knob. They were still outside the nursery! James who had been shaking her for Gordric knows how long, stared with his deep hazel eyes into her bright emerald ones. She shook violently, and he held her tightly in her arms as she cried utterly and wholly. When she began to find control once again, James released her, and she told him everything.
"I'm afraid James… this dream. Its too real and I really don't want to open that door." She finished with her hand at the door.
Her husband took her hand and set them back on the door knob "Whatever happens, don't forget, I'll be right here with you."
He let go of her hands and she turned the knob. It wasn't locked, and yet they had both their wands where gripped tightly in their arms, preparing for the worst. Quickly and together, they flung that door open and jumped in ready for the worst and found nothing just a plain little nursery with two sleeping boys sharing a crib.
"It was all just a silly dream, thank Godric." Her husband exclaimed exhaling with relief.
Still a bit worried, she raced inside to look in the crib. Two of her boys lay inside, safe and sound. Both of the boys had woken up due to the commotion, and Stephan had begun to cry loudly. She looked at them with a sigh of relief as James walked over to hug her from behind.
"Lily, there's nothing to worry about, everyone thinks that Padfoot's the secret keeper, and both Padfoot and Wormtail have gone into hiding.. the plan's perfect." He said softly in her ear.
She nodded, but hid her doubts about Wormtai. She tried to forget that his animagus form was a RAT, and how he had always ran to hide from a fight unless James, Moony, and Sirius were present. How did they ever become friends in the first place? As her thoughts spun about her troubled mind, she desperately wanted to go back in time to keep Sirius as the secret keeper. But the trust they had in him seemed so strong, maybe there was much more to him than his rodent exterior?
Stephan's wail snapped her out of her thoughts and she headed towards the crib, breaking from James' warm and loving hold. The moment Stephen spotted her, he cried even louder for her to pick him up, and she did, giving him a hug and kiss on the forehead. Meanwhile Harry found his foot and had begun to give it a taste. James picked him up and gave him a kiss on the forehead. Lily gave him a lovingly look, very pleased to see him awake and in no harm. Stephen quickly went back to sleep, and she set him farthest from her and towards the wall. She touched his soft tuft of strawberry blond locks and caressed his chubby soft baby cheeks. He was chubbier than Harry, and his skin was just a little lighter than his father's pigment. He opened his eyes slightly to peak out before going back to sleep, revealing the dark hazel eyes with bits of green towards the outer edges of the cornea.
James handed the already sleeping Harry back to Lily so she could give him a tight squeeze. His cheek touched hers and she looked at him closely against the light of the moon as he slept in her arms. He was quite a beautiful baby in the moonlight, almost doll-like with the porcelain skin, pitch-black hair, and bright green eyes when he opened them.
Lily went to set him down, but not before kissing him also on the forehead. To her surprise, a tear fell from her eye onto his cheek. The feeling of dread would not leave her, even when she was holding him alive and well in her arms. She felt so helpless as she wiped the tear from his cheek and hesitantly set him down into the crib next to his brother. Maybe it had been the nightmare, but she feared letting him go, afraid that if she would to turn her head, he would disappear forever.
She almost even picked him up again, wanting to take them both to the master bedroom, where she felt them to be safer. It seemed a good idea, just for tonight. But she shook the thought from her head, knowing if she did take them there tonight, she would do it for the next night, and the night after that and so forth until probably when they were forty. James nudged her to come back with him and she turned to leave with him.
"Maybe we should take them back with us.. just for tonight." James said noting her hesitation.
Lily turned to him "For tonight they would be safe, but what if I have this dream tomorrow, and the night after that?" she said holding tightly onto his arms. "He will always be waiting for another opportunity."
The two returned back to the bedroom where the both of them just sat on the bed in silence. After a long pause, the both of them turned their heads to each other at the same time and opened their mouths as if to speak, but stopped seeing that the other had wanted to say something. They both laughed and the both of them set their heads to their pillows. They stared at the ceiling together for another long moment in time before James would speak up.
"I'm thinking about giving up on the Auror thing when this is all over." James said aloud.
Lily immediately sat up to stare at him, to see if he was pulling her leg. "Huh?"
"Dumbledore has offered me a position to teach Defense Against the Dark Arts. " He said in a nonchalant manner.
There was another pause, and having just realized what he said, she rose up to see if he was joking.
"But isn't being an Auror the thing you've always wanted?"
He grinned, "It was.. but things change, people change. I don't think I get to spend much time with you or the twins as much as I would like, besides I don't want to end up like Barty Crouch." He said still looking to the ceiling.
She settled back down to the bed, going back to staring at the ceiling with her husband. There was a tiny crack in the ceiling she had never noticed before. She would have to fix it in the morning with a charm.
She smiled at the thought of James teaching their children at Hogwarts. "It would be nice, wouldn't it?"
He smiled back "I'll send an owl first thing in the morning."
Lily closed her eyes and for the first time in the past five nights dreamed something different for once. She dreamed happily, watching her twins grow up to be strong wizards like their herself and their father. It was a short-lived dream though, since soon after, a loud explosion rocked the house, shaking both of them awake and out of their beds. Lily paled, knowing the source of the explosion to come from the upstairs, very near the nursery. The dream began to play back in her head, as she grabbed her wand and looked to James, just before bolting from the bedroom and heading towards the upstairs nursery. She fought the nausea of knowing that this time things were going to be different when she reached that door and found it locked…