I wish you a glorious day, dudes and dudettes! Yep, me again, owing nothing, making them act out of character (especially Nightwing…) and having fun with it! This is a really weird one, so beware! Enjoy and SMILE!
Chapter 7: Interview
"You are acting very unreasonable, boyfriend Richard! You must lie down and recover! I insist!" Kori said with an exasperated tone as Raven and Garfield entered the common room this morning.
"Kori, I can't! This is important!" their leader stated weakly. He lay on the couch, pale as a sheet and looking as if he hadn't slept all night.
Apparently the alien woman just noticed her friends' arrival. "Friend Raven, friend Garfield, please help me convince boyfriend Richard to lie down, he has caught the flu, I fear."
"It's not the flu, Star! Just a little indigestion!" Dick tried to convince her as he sat up. But his girlfriend's eyes started to glow green as her anger rose.
"You have the fever and the chills, you have the weak limbs and you have thrown up all night and as I called friend Victor on his journey with friend Karen he confirmed to me that YOU HAVE THE FLU!"
Accepting that Kori wouldn't give in on the matter, he turned towards Raven and begged: "Can you heal me, please? I really need to go to this assignment!"
She sighed: "You know exactly that I cannot heal your infection due to your vaccination..."
"Ha, serves you well! That's why vaccinations are bad, bird-boy! And you forced me for years…" but Gar was stopped in his victory rant by the glare of his girlfriend.
"As I said, I can't heal you, Dick. I'm sorry but Kori is right: You need to lie down and rest until you feel better. You should delay or cancel whatever is planned."
"I can't! It's really important and today is the only possible date for it…"
"Then I'll take your assignment," she stated indifferent by his arguments.
"NO! That… that's really nice of you Raven, but… that isn't possible, it… it's a thing I got to do myself…" the masked man protested.
"RICHARD GRAYSON! You are not going to do the risking of your health for a stupid INTERVIEW!" Kori yelled.
"But-but, Star! It's… it's a man-thing! It has to be a male!"
"Then I'll just take Garfield along," Raven interrupted the couples dispute, pointing at her boyfriend.
"NO!" both men shouted in horror.
The fearless hero known as Nightwing objected: "You can't take HIM to that interview! I really need to do it on my own! You don't know what you are doing…"
Meanwhile Gar cursed: "No way am I going to a damn interview with a damn reporter! You know how I hate those jerks! They keep asking me if I come either from outer space or if I am an elf! Seriously, what the f…"
"QUIET!" Raven bellowed with reddening eyes, "You, Richard, lie down and rest, you, Garfield, are coming with me and give this interview, and you, Kori, will make sure that Richard stays here and gets better, no tamaranean remedies! He'll just need to drink as much water as he can, eat bland diet and sleep a lot. Am I making myself clear?"
They all slumped down and answered squeaking: "Yes, Raven!" while Gar had to add: "But if they ask me about if I'm an alien I'll be so out of it…"
The dark empath rolled her eyes and said annoyed: "Let's just get it over…."
Although Raven had to threaten her leader to vaporize all of his masks to get the information of the time and location of the interview and she partly had to drag Gar to the assigned place, she was determined to go through this interview without any problems. Two hours later she had been taught better.
The scene they were in could have come out of a nightmare, Ravens' as well as Gar's. They sat in a small but fancy bureau in the People-Magazine redaction with the probably most randy reporter they ever had met, a twiggy middle aged female with short red hair and pale skin who drooled over Gar like a starving person over an all-you-can-eat buffet.
Gar, who could be charming and easy to talk to, despised reporters, especially since the encounter with Lois Lane and Clark Kent and was fidgeting nervously on his chair in utter discomfort. Raven sat next to him and she was –to say the least – downright pissed.
Right after they had met the reporter called Candy Cane (apparently a fake name) he had directly stated: "If you ask me a question I don't like and insist on an answer, I'm out of it." Candy had laughed it off and let them to her bureau.
"You know, I am really glad you could make it; Nightwing said you couldn't, so he offered to be your replacement. We already know each other from the last two years but you impressively dethroned him this year. Not that anyone was surprised by it, I mean, look at you…" she shamelessly had checked him out at her last words.
"Sorry, Mrs. Cane, but I don't get what you are talking about," he had frowned.
She had placed a hand on his chest and asked flirty: "Didn't your leader tell you? Maybe he was jealous… And please, call me Candy!"
Gar had backed down blushing and Raven, already boiling in anger had stepped in between. "Maybe you can enlighten us in the subject, but if you won't keep your hands of him you won't get any interview at all…" she had hissed menacingly.
"S-sorry, didn't know he brought his watchdog to chaperone over him…" the reporter had stated half joking, but already sweating bullets. The green man had to hold Raven back to not harm her.
"She's my girlfriend, so explain why we're here or we'll be gone."
The thin woman looked like someone announced Christmas would come early this year.
"Right, Nightwing mentioned! Tell me about, come on!" she exclaimed with wide joyful eyes, dragging them into her office. ¨
But Raven stopped her insisting: "Why are we here?"
"Oh, I beg your pardon, I'm just so excited! The last two years, Nightwing had won the award for the hottest male superhero of the year, so I hadn't to tell him. But this year, you have doubled him easily, taken over his crown, Changeling. So, congrats, and I hope I can ask you some questions about you and your daily routine, you know, let the fans know you better…"
"If you want him to spill anything, you'll follow my rules! First, if he doesn't want to answer a question you'll leave it be, no further asking or you won't be able to ask a question for the rest of your life. Second, you'll only write what he actually and really tells word by word, or I'll haunt you a century for every lied word. And third, you won't touch him or I'll rip your skin of your body before you can yell for help," Raven snarled vicious. Candy let go of them immediately, paling and gulping heavily.
"O-o-o-okay…"
So now there they sat, Candy drooling, Gar fidgeting, Raven glaring…
"Changeling, first question: How come you look the way you do? It's hot, and our readers wonder if there are more of your kinds." Bad start…
He frowned and glanced at his girlfriend for permission to leave, but she shook her head and said: "If you don't want to answer, just say no comment and she'll leave it at that."
"No comment," he shot immediately.
Candy wasn't taken aback. "Then maybe you can tell our readers how you and Raven came to be. No one expected that, although there had been rumors, but nothing convincing."
He blushed and repeated: "No comment." The mission that had finally led to their relationship was top secret. Nightwing would kill him if he would spill. Although he would have to be revived before, because Gar was determined to strangle his leader as soon as they would be back.
"Uhm, Nightwing stated, you have an inner beast, that sounds hot…" she said nibbling on her pencil.
"No comment."
"Alright. Let's talk about your family. Where are they? What are they doing? What do they think of your hero-life? Nightwing had mentioned something that your childhood was rather troubled."
"No comment," he said trying to ignore the growing annoyance. How much had Nightwing told this infernal woman?
Candy rustled through her notices. "Uhm, okay… Oh! That's a good one! It's about the reason that made you win the award in the end… Rumor has it, that the bruise Superman wears on his chin since a few months was custody of no other than you… Nightwing let shine through something like that on the phone."
Gar pressed his lips together and tensed up even more. He didn't want to badmouth other heroes. But as he didn't say a word, Candy saw an opening in his reaction. She leaned closer, lowering her voice.
"Apparently he had insulted you on a delicate matter, they say…" she grinned eagerly and glanced at Raven, "And considering your good hearted nature and who your girlfriend is, it probably was something about her."
"No comment," he growled lowly.
The reporter sighed:"Please, is there anything you are ready to tell me?"
He relaxed the slightest bit and said: "I like tofu… and my favorite color is purple."
Now she looked vexed. "Well, anything that isn't common knowledge…" He crossed his arms and didn't respond. Desperately she turned to the other female and began: "Maybe you can…" but was shut by the murderous look on Ravens face.
"Can we go now?" the dark sorceress asked indigent.
Candy Cane looked down on her notes and looked like she was going to cry. "Yes, of course… I don't think this will lead to anything…" Gar felt a little guilty until the elder woman looked up with hope in her eyes: "Unless you would want to tell me something about your team members! Nightwing mentioned that Cyborg is rather afraid of Raven…"
But he just growled annoyed and said: "We're so out of this!" Raven agreed mutely and made them disappear in a black portal. The reporter sighed again and looked at her notes. She would need to call Nightwing again, he surely would tell her more in exchange to the information she had for him.
Back at the tower, Richard sat on the couch, covered in a ton of blankets surrounded by seemingly hundreds of water bottles and got stroked from his girlfriend. There were actually worse things than being sick and he felt a lot better than this morning.
Suddenly Raven and Garfield teleported in the middle of the room, apparently both in a rather bad mood. They both had crossed arms and wore grim expressions. He knew it was a bad idea but still the curiosity was killing him, so he asked: "Welcome back, how was it going?" How bad his idea had been he knew at their reaction.
They approached the couch, stopped right in front of him and glared down. If looks could kill he would have been twelve feet under at the very moment.
"You told a reporter about my 'troubled childhood'…" Gar shot lightning bolts through his eyes.
"You mentioned our involvement in the situation with Superman…" Raven thundered.
"What exactly have you told her about Raven and me being together?"
"And why on earth did you tell her that Victor is afraid of me?"
Richard gulped heavily: "Seems like you got more information out of her than she out of you…"
Gar huffed: "You bet! And I am really thinking about giving cannibalism a try just this once…"
"I would gladly cook him for you, Gar," his girlfriend added with venom.
"… but I don't want to overeat myself with such a big mouth!"
"It probably won't fit in any of our pans."
"Just you wait until you're better, I'll beat you into hospital, bird-brain!" he growled and turned to leave.
"… If there is something left to be beaten when I am finished with you…" Raven hissed and followed her boyfriend.
Kori had stopped the stroking and glared at him with crossed arms as well. "You were practicing the spilling of the beans to an outsider about our close friends who trust you and you were even considering to do the risk of your health to proceed?"
He chuckled nervously: "I guess I messed up, but, you know, she had some background information about Slade she was ready to trade against some insider stories of the Titans…"
"This obsession of yours about Slade has to stop, we captured him weeks ago and he is still in jail! I think I must inform friend Victor that you will be in need for the therapy."
"Come on, Kori! I'm not that obsessed!" he tried to charm her. She only lifted an eyebrow, shot him an indignant "hmph" and left him alone.
"Kori? I am still sick!" he yelled after her. Maybe he had to do something about his Slade obsession, but that man was dangerous… He could already be planning his escape… Come to think about it, he hadn't called yet today to confirm he still was in jail…
He took out his communicator and pushed on speed dial.
"Jump City Jail, high-security wing, division for the mentally disturbed criminals, Miller here."
"Joe, it's me."
"Nightwing, he still is in his cell, still mumbling like a madman holding on to a stuffed white rabbit sucking his thumb. If he ever will break out of jail it would probably be to visit Disneyland or rob a toy store…" the man on the line replied with an annoyed tone.
"Stay alert, you never know!" the hero replied seriously.
"Yeah, sure. I'll hear you tomorrow I guess…"