A/N: I'm so excited! I took a stab at humor this time, but don't expect anything knee-slapping hilarious. I am not Cassandra Clare - a view which is thoroughly expressed in the disclaimer down below. This is my second chapter, (which is a bit longer than the first one - yay!) so enjoy! Rate and review!

Disclaimer: Sadly, my fairy godmother has not yet visited, and besides, it's already past twelve o'clock, so no, I am not Cassandra Clare. I wish I was. But I'm not. Therefore, I own 0% of The Mortal Instruments books. Like, absolutely 0. Zero. Zip. Zilch. Nada. Donut. Bagel. Any kind of pasty found in bakeries with a hole in the middle. (I think you get the idea.)

Jace woke up to the sound of thundering footsteps. His first thought was Oh god, we're going to be stampeded to death by a horde of unicorns. His second thought was Why the hell would we be stampeded by unicorns? And his third thought was Oh, wait - there are no unicorns, since this is most likely a mundane forest. Oops.

Beside him, Alec slept soundly. Jace idly wondered how it was possible for anyone to sleep through this noise, but then again, Alec slept through his own snoring. Clearly, he was talented in a way Jace was not.

Speaking of talents, Alec also had a habit of muttering in his sleep. For example, right now, he was muttering something about spiders, large spiders, larger spiders, tarantulas, Jace, webs - wait a second. Jace?

The smaller boy leaned in to hear exactly what his brother was mumbling so agitatedly.

"Jace, no," he said, his face twisted into a horrible look of sadness. "Imagine if anyone found out."

Jace raised an eyebrow. What in the world was Alec talking about?

"Stupid spiders!" Alec half-yelled. "Jace, make them go away!"

Alarmed, Jace shook Alec's shoulder frantically. "Wake up!" he said. "Wake up, you damn -"

Alec woke up. "What the hell?" he asked, sitting up. Jace, who hadn't moved, was still leaning over his brother and hadn't realized it yet. Alec banged his forehead nicely with Jace's.

"Watch it, will you?" Jace snapped, rubbing his head ruefully. For someone who's head seemed awfully empty sometimes, Alec's head was really hard. Maybe it was his thick skull.

Alec glared at him. "What's that noise?"

Jace shrugged. "Stampeding unicorns? A space ship landing? Evil ducks? The possibilities are endless."

His parabatai looked at him oddly.

"Couldn't sleep," Jace said, just to keep Alec's mind off him. "Have a nice dream?"

"No," Alec said, blushing and opening a bag. He pulled a packet of food out. "I had a nightmare."

Jace resisted the urge to smile. He settled for a smirk. "I'm not that ugly, you know."

Alec choked on his food. "What are you talking about?"

"I was in your dream, right?"

The black haired boy stared at him. "How did you know?"

"Lucky guess," Jace said, shrugging. When Alec didn't look satisfied, he added, "Okay, fine, it's a weird skill I have. You know, a unique talent."

Alec stared at him as though he was watching Jace grow another head.

"I'm going out to clear my head," Alec said. He got up and walked out of the tent. Of course, Jace hadn't known it then, but a few minutes after that, all of hell - or at least a very large portion of it - broke loose.

"Mom," Isabelle sighed, "I too wish to hit Magnus over the head with a frying pan. Unfortunately, that won't help anything."

Maryse Lightwood's face was contorted with rage, a large steel pan raised above her head. Magnus, despite being the more powerful one in this situation, had wisely ducked behind Isabelle and was now bravely peeking out from her shoulder. He ducked again when Maryse glared at him like a mama bear without her cub.

"How," she seethed, "could you let this happen?"

Magnus was cut short from answering by Maryse. She didn't look as though she wanted to be answered.

"You sent them to the Arctic? Now? Have you gone insane, filthy Downworlder? I should kill you right now and - "

To everyone's surprise, it was Robert Lightwood who interrupted his wife. "She does not mean all that," he quickly assured Magnus, taking the frying pan from Maryse's hand. "She is just extremely worried."

Magnus slid out from behind Isabelle's back. "Trust me, I will do everything in my power to bring them back as soon as possible," he promised.

"You better!" Maryse yelled, and then stalked out of the kitchen.

Robert looked at him hard for a while with an unreadable expression. After a while, he simply turned to his daughter and said, "Needless to say, Isabelle, your lessons will be postponed until your brothers are present to join you." With that, he left.

Isabelle looked at Magnus. "Can't you summon Santa and just ask him to find Jace and Alec or something?" she asked.

Magnus smirked. "Ha ha," he said. "Crack jokes while I'm under threat of potentially dying a horrible death by the hands of your mother."

Isabelle smiled sweetly at him.

The warlock sighed. "I'll go talk to some - er, friends of mine." And then he left too, leaving Isabelle to wonder why they'd ever started to play the stupid game in the first place.

It wasn't until after the giant was chasing them that Alec realized sneaking out without Jace into the unknown wilderness had been a really bad idea. As usual, his curiosity had gotten the better of him, and he'd followed the trail of hoof marks until he'd reached the cave. Of course, the stupid hundred foot tall giant had picked now to step outside his house for an afternoon stroll.

Needless to say, Jace was furious with him.

Most people had two quick instincts. Fight, or flight. Alec had three - fight, flight, or screw up big time. Of course, his adrenaline had rushed his brain to the third choice.

"Wasn't being teleported to god knows where good enough for you?" Jace yelled as he ran. "Wasn't that enough excitement?"

Alec, despite being longer limbed, was slightly behind Jace. "I said I'm sorry!"

Jace rolled his eyes. "Go tell that to the giant!"

Alec reached for his dagger, but then realized that they didn't have any weapons on them. "Shit!" he yelled.

"Language, Alexander," Jace said, in a voice so much like their mother's that Alec shivered. He ran faster.

"Humans!" the giant behind them bellowed. "I will get you!"

"Like hell you will," Jace muttered, and then dove headfirst into the river that had just come into view. Sighing, Alec braced himself for the impact of the cold water and ran into the upcoming body of water. It never came. Instead, he felt a rush or warmth as he landed on a soft grassy patch.

"Where are we?" Alec asked. "What is this?"

Jace smirked, looking around. "I don't know," he said, "but it beats being chased by a giant and losing all of our supplies."

Alec gulped.

"Penguins?" Isabelle asked, sitting on Magnus's furry white couch. "That's who your friends are?"

Magnus sniffed. "You try making friends on top of glaciers. It's not easy, you know."

What Magnus had been doing on top of those glaciers, Isabelle wasn't sure she wanted to know. Instead, she tapped her foot on the wooden floors impatiently. "Well, what did you want to tell me? I had to sneak out behind my parents' backs."

The sparkly warlock frowned. "That shouldn't have been a problem for you," he said seriously. "You strike me as the sort of person who's already done that a million times before."

Isabelle scowled, but then realized Magnus was right. "Maybe," she admitted, "but if you don't tell me what I came here for in the next two minutes, your skin will no longer be that tanned color."

Magnus raised an eyebrow. "Do I get a say in your choice of color?" he asked. "I've always wondered what I'd look like if my skin was a light blue color."

"Let's say your skin will turn black. And possibly blue. And maybe a hint of dark purple."

"Fine," the glittery man grumbled, "be that way."

Isabelle beamed. "I didn't wake up at three in the morning to talk about how well fashion and bruises go together," she said seriously. "I have enough time to do that when I'm naturally awake."

Magnus looked down. "See, here's the thing. I've summoned demons and penguins, angels and polar bears, and none of them have seen Jace and Alec. Apparently, the whole place is void of any human activity."

Isabelle's eyes smoldered. For a while, she couldn't think of anything to say.

Magnus looked up at her helplessly. "You can see why I wanted to tell you first and then your parents."

The raven-haired girl calmed herself. She was Isabelle Lightwood. She did not panic. "I have a better idea," she said slowly, looking up to meet Magnus's green cat eyes. "Let's not breathe a word of this to my parents. We'll just say you're continuing your search."

"Thank you, Isabelle," Magnus said, sarcastically, "I hadn't thought of that."

Isabelle looked at him levelly. "Hey, I'm trying to help you get out of a ditch here," she said. "Just listen. Maybe Clary and Simon can help. I don't know about Jocelyn, but Luke can do something. Same with Simon. He's a vampire, so maybe he can talk to other clans around the world."

The tall man shook his head. "Luke would feel compelled to tell Maryse," he said. "And Simon's existence is barely accepted by the Downworld. They will be no help."

"Can't Clary just create a finding rune?" Isabelle demanded.

Magnus thought about this. "I think so," he said. "And I can definitely go into my old rune books for a search spell."

"Aren't you supposed to know how to do those?"

"Yes, but since they seem to be invisible or something, I think we'll need a different spell."

"Hey, Magnus?"

The warlock looked up from his papers. "Yes?"

"You have a spare bedroom right?"

He nodded.

"Tell my parents I went to Taki's or something for breakfast if they come around," Isabelle said. "I'm going to sleep."

Magnus's protests were ignored by the tall girl, who had come wearing only her pajamas, and now promptly walked away into Magnus's spare bedroom.

"You look lost," a voice said. Jace spun around to see who it was. "Impressively fast, too," the voice said.

"Who are you?" Alec asked, his voice quivering.

The anonymous speaker's deep voice came again. "Pretty, too. I think they're good ones."

"Bah," a second voice said, this one gravelly and old. "They're all the same."

"What are you talking about?" Jace asked. "And why am I not swimming through some murky river trying to avoid banging my head on rocks?"

The two voices laughed. "Welcome to the land of Faerie," the first voice said.

Unexpectedly, their encounter with the queen passed fairly well. The threats were kept to a minimum - although Jace lost count after twenty-three - and they struck a deal. The faeries would get their supplies back for them, but Jace and Alec had to kill a wild animal that apparently terrorized faeries in the region. Thankfully, the local Faerie queen here was a lot more helpful that Queen Seelie, who Jace despised from the bottom of his heart, and had given them the tools to do everything. The day had passed by feeling somewhat normal - Jace and Alec fighting side by side, and although their weapons felt foreign in their hands, it was pretty similar to what usually happened.

Right now, Jace was lying down in the tent, unable to sleep. Outside, Alec, bleary-eyed, was attempting to be on guard. Jace poked his head out of the tent.

"I can't sleep," he said. "Switch."

Alec obliged. "How can you not sleep?" he asked, just as he tucked himself into his sleeping bag.

Jace shrugged, and then smiled up at his brother. "So, we made it through the first day, huh," he said.

"Yeah," Alec said.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Didn't I ask you that last night?"

Jace shrugged again. "What was your dream about?"

Alec's pale cheeks turned a furious pinkish red.

"Well?"

"I don't want to talk about it," Alec said flatly.

"Well, if I'm in your dream, don't I get the right to know what happened to me in the dream?" Jace demanded. "Did I die? Did I slay the tarantula? Did the spiders eat us?"

Alec cringed. "I don't want to talk about it," he said flatly.

Jace cocked his head to the side. "Tomorrow," he started slowly, "I'll wrestle you. Spar with you. Whatever."

His parabatai was already shaking his head.

"Chicken?"

"No," Alec scowled.

"Then come on," Jace said. "If I win, you have to tell me about your dream. And don't bother lying, because you're terrible at it."

"But if I win..."

"You get to keep your dreams to yourself. I won't bother you for another couple more days."

Alec sighed. "Fine. But right now, good night. I need sleep."

Jace watched as Alec curled into himself and fell asleep, wondering what in the world his brother's dream could have held.

A/N: I'm so awesome, aren't I? I totally forgot I was supposed to be incorporating humor until the very end. And by then I was like - I should go back and put more humor. Nah, never mind, I'll try harder on the next chapter. I know, procrastination at its greatest. A.k.a. Me. Anyways, rate and review! Suggestions are always welcome, and so is constructive criticism. And one more thing - what do you think should happen next in the story? My writing is kind of repeating itself, which it's kind of supposed to do, but not really, if you know what I mean. I'm coming up at a writer's block... I mean, I know what's going to happen romance wise, but for action...

Anyway, thanks for reading! (And sorry for blabbering on the paragraph above.)