(All of this grammarless, misspelled, filth is exactly as I had posted it on Fanfiction five or so years ago. It just goes to show you was some serious scolded I probably needed in my youth haha!)
I no own naruto! No matter how much I want to
This world needs more Tobi!
Tobi awoke that morning to the floor. Odd as that seems, its quite normal. For you see Tobi rolls in his sleep and usually wakes up this way. Not deterred from this, Tobi gets up happy as ever (ahh morning people…so few of them) and stretches and untangles himself from his blanket.
'Tobi wonders if Deidara-sampi is awake yet…' Tobi thought to himself. Tobi looks around and sees his beloved sampi still asleep in his bed hugging a pillow, which makes Tobi giggle.
'Sampi's asleep…better stay quiet!' Tobi smiles under his mask, which he slept in, and proceeds to tip toe to the bathroom. Tobi, dramatic as ever, took wide steps and ends up tripping on an article of clothing, squeaking, Tobi tries to catch himself by holding onto a conveniently placed shelf. But alas today was not Tobi's lucky day, for he held onto Deidara's shelf which held some of his explosive birds. Tobi fell to the floor with a loud thud and all of the birds fell with him causing a large explosion that blackens the room and our poor Tobi.
"Gah!" Deidara awakes with a jolt bolting upright just in time to see a black Tobi coughing and sitting on the floor in his jammies. "Tobi, what the hell?" Deidara screamed causing Tobi to jump up and start to stutter and apology but Deidara would hear none of it, and proceeded to throw everything in reach at poor Tobi. Tobi manages to dodge the lamp but a shoe smacks him right in the face making him stumble back.
"Tobi is sorry sampi! Please stop throwing things at Tobi's head!" Tobi squeaks ducking another lamp and runs out of the room away from his fuming sampi, only to bump into his favorite plant man. "Zetsu-san!" Tobi exclaims excitedly attaching himself to Zetsu.
"T-Tobi why are you all black? Probably annoying the blonde again….stupid kid." Zetsu's white side asks worriedly while his black side just states boredly.
"Tobi didn't mean to Zetsu-san! He tripped on a pair of Deidara's panties!" Tobi shouts in his defense.
Zetsu blushes lightly getting a sweat drop as well thinking 'we didn't need to know that Tobi…I knew that blond wore female underwear…kind of arousing. Stop thinking like that you pervert!' Zetsu blushes at his own argument with himself and puts down Tobi. "Tobi try not to annoy Deidara…and go change your still in your pajamas." Tobi looks down and sure enough, he's still in his shorts with little Akatsuki clouds on them and a plain black t-shirt. Tobi giggles and rushes to his room grabbing clothes before Deidara could blow him up, and went into the bathroom changing into his usual outfit.
"Hmm...Tobi wonders what Hidans doing!" Tobi smiles under his mask and skips off to find our lovable Jashinist.
Hidan was in his room praying on the floor when Tobi bursts in causing Hidan to jump a little then glare at the orange masked ninja. "Tobi what the fuck do you want?" Hidan shouts annoyed to have his precious ritual disturbed.
"Tobi just wanted to make Hidan-sans day happy!" Tobi chirps happily.
'Ugh...damnit just what I need...' Hidan thinks to himself then glares at Tobi once more. "I don't need you to make my fucking day better! I need you to leave!" Hidan yells a little making Tobi back up slightly not sure what he did wrong.
"But Hidan-san is always so grumpy! Deidara-sampi says its cause you don't have enough fun!" Tobi exclaims throwing up his arms as if to emphasize the word 'fun'. Tobi skips over despite Hidan growling at him and he pokes Hidan in the forehead. "Fun!" Tobi exclaims once more.
Hidans eye almost twitches when Tobi pokes him, and it actually does when Tobi says 'fun'. Hidan then got an idea and smirked. "Well...I do need fun...ill show you what i like to do for fun!" The look on Hidans face made Tobi step back a little and when Tobi realizes Hidans reaching for his scythe he squeaks jumping up and runs out of the room with a fuming Hidan at his heals swinging his scythe, determined to cut the youngers head off. "Get your orange wearing masked ass back here!" Hidan shouts and Tobi just runs faster heading into the kitchen, where the rest of the Akatsuki where eating breakfast. Tobi jumps onto the table to avoid one of Hidans swings and lands on a plate sending its contents into Itachi's hair, then ran across the table slipping on the table cloth making leaders coffee spill into his lap. The leader jumps up shouting angrily at Tobi (after all who wouldn't yell after having hot coffee spilled in your crotch am i right?) and Hidan threw the whole table out of the way causing Kisame to be covered in orange juice, Sasori to have a chunk of hair cut off thanks to Hidans scythe, Kakuzu to have his Cheerios thrown into his face, and Konan to have her toast fly off to god knows where. With everyone glaring at them, Hidan and Tobi freeze with Hidan about to punch Tobi in the face and Tobi is cowering and whimpering like a terrified puppy.
"HIDAN!" leader shouts in pure fury trying to keep his cloak away from his crotch as it is still hot from the coffee. "What the hell!"
"the little bastard ruined my ritual!" shouts back, not being the one for respect for the leader he says it in a very matter of fact way, as if he's talking to an idiot.
"ill give you something to bitch about Hidan!" leader growls tackling Hidan to the floor and beginning to strangle him while everyone else starts yelling at each other for getting food in there hair, face, area. Meanwhile Sasori is huddled in a corner with a pot on his head covering his new bald spot oblivious to the chaos around him. Poor Tobi just sits on the floor tilting his head to the side in a cute confused way. "Tobi just wanted to make everyone happy...oooo toast!" Tobi states then squeals excitedly picking up a plate of uneaten toast and skips to the living room to enjoy his breakfast. Now I bet your wondering where Zetsu is. Well our little plant man is buried out in the yard, he's been there for several days after Tobi 'helped' him in the garden.
A/N thanks for reading! I had fun with this one lol please review! I'm a new artist and criticism is needed so I don't looks like an idiot! *waves a stop sign at on coming traffic*
(Horrible isn't it? Did anyone catch how bad I spelt sempai? Egh sampi...what the heck is a sampi? Haha! And how the heck did Zetsu go from talking to Tobi that morning to apparently being burring in the garden for several days? Apparently Zetsu has temporal space powers. Why did I think this was good?! Why did no one tell me how bad it was?! I blame the schools haha.)
(Thanks for reading everyone!)