Disclaimer: I do not own Kuroshitsuji

*Sorry for the late update everyone! thanks so much for reading*

Chapter five: running to nothing

Alois turned over on his side and ran his hands through Claud's black hair. He knew he wouldn't stir. It was an order from him to sleep every night, after all, and it wasn't dawn quite yet. He looked like a weak, fragile human being when he slept, and it made him glad. The only thing he enjoyed more was watching him struggle when he demanded dominance.

What they did was for pleasure only, every touch careless and nothing but impulsive nature. It was absurd to him that people like himself and his beloved Ceil could drop to such levels. Intimacy was pointless with someone like Claude, who only craved him for his soul, but what was the harm in having a little fun if, in your hand, you held someone so eager to obey?

"Master," Claude said, leaning in and planting kisses on his neck when he awoke.
"Stop it already," Alois said, pushing him away without hesitancy,"We don't have time for any of that today."
"Yes, your majesty." he said, and excused himself to dress in clean work clothing. The curtains were pulled aside and it was unusually pleasant.
"The sky," he said to himself,"It's so pure. The sun's rays pierce through it effortlessly. What would happen, I wonder, if it was permanently polluted with those depressing things."
"You mean clouds, master?" Claude asked, presenting the day's outfit for approval.
"No, clouds should be white. We have contaminated the very air we breathe. It turns them grey and toxic. There is no such thing as a 'cloud' any more."
"Whatever you say, Alois." he said, pulling the nightshirt completely off.
"What have I told you about using my name?" he asked, annoyed at his servant's stupidity,"Unless I fuck you so hard that you have no choice but to scream or I order you to, refer to me by my status. I am your master."
The demon stopped buttoning his blouse to give him a dramatic bow.
"Yes, young master."
"That's better. Now hurry up and finish. We have to leave soon."
"Where is it you need me to bring you in such haste?"
"A funeral."
"I wasn't aware any of your relatives passed away."
"No, they're all alive and well...at least for now. We're going to eavesdrop. Madam Red, Phantomhive's aunt, was mysteriously murdered a few nights ago."
"Are you sure it is safe to be going to a family reunion?"
"We'll just have to be extra careful they don't notice us. I'm sure you'll figure something out."

Claude masked his distaste. He could do anything his master desired, of course, but it was rude to ask of things preposterous to request from other humans. He did ask a reasonable favor in return, though. He licked his lips and thought of how good it would taste to suck an entire soul out of the brat. Their nightly games would only sustain him for so much time. He had never remained with a contractor for such a long period of time before, and it was even worse now that he had a taste for the boy's blood. It wasn't at all as enticing as others he had molded, but it would make do. There was something to be desired of something dangerous. Yes, his unbalanced personality would be delectable...

"Claude! I thought I told you to hurry up."
"I apologize, my lord." he said, and dutifully returned to dressing him. Decent enough, he thought to himself, if I can get past the aftertaste of his arrogance and pitiful obsessive nature.

"Mey-Rin!" Ciel yelled from the carriage. He was already late, which was even more convenient for Alois to find a suitable place for observation.
"Y-yes, y-young m-master?" she stuttered. He placed one palm against his face and exhaled heavily.
"Please tell me you brought it."
"Brought what?"
"I thought I specifically told every one of you that if we do anything at all, that we should-"
"Don't fret, my lord. I have it." his butler reassured him with a small smile. It was the least he could do for him, seeing that he was already bearing so much of the weight by himself already. It was unnatural for one so young to even be able to function after something so dreadful.
As he went to grab it, he heard a small whisper from behind. "Thank you, Sebastian."
He smiled a little and had Mey-Rin look over it one last time for wrinkles or creases. It was to be perfect, and he had prepared one last finishing touch to ensure just that.

"That's the man you spoke to me about, Claude?" the boy asked.
"Yes, master. He is a demon like myself, and has a contract with the Phantomhive boy."
"Is that all?" he asked suspiciously, noticing a tenderness in the eyes of an impassive being.
"For now, but it's obvious to me as well."
"We should do something about that."
"Whatever you wish will be carried out flawlessly, I assure you." he replied, but wasn't looking forward to having to fight anything as strong as the demon they were spying on.
"What do you think he's doing with a dress like that?" he asked, seeing Ciel prepared by the church door," He's not going to wear it, is he?"
"I'm not sure, my lord."
"Red...that would look quite nice on him. A red dress; like red blood. If it pleases him enough, I can cover him in it. I'll drown him in blood." he said adoringly.
"Yes, I'm sure he would enjoy that."

Ciel took a deep breathe and let the wind that lifted the dress's ruffles steal the last of his sorrow. His regrets could wait until he could give his aunt what she deserved.
"Sebastian-"he said,"Go ahead. I'm ready now."
"Very good, young master." he said, and threw the doors open so he could make his entrance.
The service had halted . All eyes lay on him and the colloquial dress unlike the other color in the room. Elizabeth stood closest to the coffin and tried to help him but he shook his head at her.
This was his responsibility, and he flung it over the dead body. She really did look more alive this way, more at peace without the traditional white. She was never the traditional kind of girl.
"Goodbye." he whispered and felt light petals cover his back. Unknown to him, Sebastian had gathered red roses and threw their petals to the wind. It tainted the imperfect pureness of the service like she would have wanted.
Anyone who had objected now stood in respect and bowed their heads, tying to hold back tears.

Sebastian slowly shut the doors so the service could end peacefully and called out to them.
"I know you're over there. Theres no use hiding with you scents, so please don't make this more difficult than it need to be." he partially removed his knives and glared at the bushes.
"Hmmm, you're keener than I expected." Claude said, dusting his slacks off and approaching him.
"Do you think I would still exist if I couldn't sense a demon's presence by now?" he asked,"What about the boy?"
"There is no need for him to be involved."
"What is your purpose for imposing on a private event? What interest do you have in that women?"
He laughed at his question."Oh, it's not the women we're here for. It seems that my young master has an interest in something of yours."
"I know who you are now," he said, nose wrinkling in disgust."You're that intolerable drunk from the ball."
"Come now. You know just as well as I do that we demons cannot become intoxicated by such weak substances."
"You drank to hide yourself from me."
"I will do anything to fulfill my master's wishes."
"Which are what, exactly?"
"Haven't you figured it out yet? I though it was obvious that we require Ceil Phantomhive."
"Impossible. You will never get him when I've already claimed him. You aren't permitted to lay a hand on another contractor."
"We'll just have to see about that. Watch him closely, if you wish, but nothing could keep him safe forever unless you choose to deprive yourself and consume his soul before his time."
"I will protect him. He's mine, and I am bound to him."
"In what way? By the look in your eyes, it doesn't seems as business-like as a demon would prefer. Have you grown attached to the brat?"
"Do not insult him. He is the head of the Phantomhive household, my master."
"And your lover?"
"If you truly desire an answer, I do have an attachment to him, but it's different than what you think it is."
"No, I think it's you who doesn't understand. I know what it feels like to mark your contractor and fill his eyes with lust. We do it every night, but do you have that much self-control?"
"Do not jump to conclusions. I have never touched him like that." Except for that one kiss...
"Then what-" his eyes widened a bit and inhaled quickly in shock of the realization,"You actually care for him."
"Don't say those words with such venom. I'm at least not stupid enough to go against another's contract."
"Fair point, but it will make it all the more interesting to see when you watch your precious human suffer at my hand."
"You-" Sebastian picked him up by his neck and growled.
"Claude-!" Alois ran out and tugged on his butler's sleeve in anxiety, but it was no use.

"Sebastian! I order you to unhand him." Ciel called from the doorway. He had no interest in the social exchanges and had left his seat. He met his butler's gaze and watched him reluctantly release the other man.
"Why did you attack?" Before he could receive an answer, though, the boy ran forward and yanked on his hair.
"Oh, Ciel! We can finally meet in person." Alois slurred, enamored with his soft hair.
"Get off of me! What do you think you're doing?" he asked.
"I think it's better to show you," he said, and leaned in close. Despite protests, he smashed their lips together. It lasted too long for him to keep his mouth shut and gasped for air. A tongue was roughly shoved in and he tried desperately to get away.
"Sebas-ngh!" he tried to say. His butler was just staring at them in shock and paralyzed from anger. It was Claude who pulled him out of his trance, nudging him teasingly.
"Enjoying the show, are we?" he whispered in his ear.
"Stay the hell away from him!" Sebastian said, and easily picked the invasive Trancy and tossed him to his own demon.
"Awww, you're both so cute. Look at their faces; so shocked! Was that your first kiss, Ciel dearest?"
The young earl stopped panting and tightened his grip on Sebastian's arm for support.
"No, my fist kiss was-" he smirked,"It was amazing. You taste like a piece of trash."
Sebastian stared at his young master with an unreadable expression. Claude tried not to laugh, but Alois didn't mind hid crude behavior and chuckled.
"It doesn't matter what you have to say now. We'll see each other again soon, and you'll come running to me eventually."
"Sebastian, I order you to make them leave."
"With pleasure, my lord." he advanced on them, and began met knives with Claude.
"You could have just asked us to go. There's not much I wouldn't do for you, love."
"Don't call me that!"
"Claude!" he called, ignoring him."Stop messing around and take me back now."
When he returned to his side, Alois reached into his coat pocket and removed a leather journal with letters engrained into the cover. It was Ciel's initials.
"Where did you get that?" he demanded.
"You should keep better track of this. It would be a shame if it were to fall into the wrong hands, don't you think?"
"Give it back!"
"With pleasure," he said, throwing it at a height that he couldn't reach. Sebastian caught it for him and slipped it into his coat for safekeeping.
"I hope to see you soon, love."
"Not likely."
He received an enthusiastic wave and walked in the other direction.
"I'll be waiting for the day that disgusting creature breaks your heart!" he yells in farewell.

"Young master? Please talk to me if something is bothering you." Sebastian said worriedly. He sat directly across from Ciel and watched him go from angry to becoming confused and now somber. He wondered what he was thinking about, if anything at all. Feeling didn't require any thoughts, or else things would be much easier for him.
"I thought things had changed, but I guess I'm naive like that. I reach for the unreachable. Doesn't that aggravate you, that you're bound to someone whose goals will take eternity if they're even possible?"
"I will stay with you, no matter what it is or how long it takes."
"You didn't answer my question."
"No," he said softly,"I wouldn't go if you gave me the choice."
"What if I let you take it now?"
"Take what, my lord? I desire nothing more-" he stopped,"You wish to give me your soul now?"
"I already did, but you don't have to wait any longer. I won't mind." he said, at peace with being taken apart by the one he loved.
Sebastian pondered that and prodded his master's chin up with his hand. "Why do you desire you to die so badly?"
"I don't want to die. I want to exist, but it doesn't really matter now, does it? I gave up that freedom years ago."
"I don't want to take that away from you. I don't want you to disappear, either."
"I'm glad I can entertain you." he said passively. Sebastian ignored him.
"You said something earlier; that you thought things had changed. What kinds of things?"
"It doesn't matter."
"That's not true, young master. If it didn't matter, you wouldn't hurt so much. I cannot force you to open up to me, but know you can trust me with anything."
"What a nice thing to say," Ceil said wistfully,"What a lovely lie."

Sebastian grabbed his hands roughly and pinned them above them. He leaned his head against the wall by his master's skull.
"It's not. I cannot lie to you."
"Please move. Don't get so close to me," he panted. It made his heart race to have him so close, to breathe so much of him in.
"If you want me to move, you'll have to order me. Is that really what you want? You did say," he nuzzled his hair,"That I could touch you."
"Sebastian," he moaned,"Don't do this. I hate it when you tease me like this."
"I'm not teasing you."
"Yes, you are. Why else would you do these things? You must know how it makes me feel."
"I wish I could understand as well as you say I can, but I've given up on trying to figure you out."
"And I thought I made it so obvious." he said, and moved a pair of their intertwined hands to his neck. Sebastian returned the favor and they listened intently to their pulse.
"I was under the impression that it was mine."
"It is," Ciel pointed out smugly,"I think yours might be going a little faster."
"Perhaps, but I'm the one who has to restrain you."
"From what? I haven't done anything." he asked pointedly.
"From running away." he breathed," I don't want you to ignore this."
"Is that what you've wanted this whole time?" he asked, shoving him away. "You want me to admit another weakness you can hold against me."
"You still think that blackmailing you is all I care about? That I try my very hardest to make your life a living hell?"
"I know what you are. I know what you want."
"What do you think I want?"
"My soul," he replied, but less sure than he was before.
"Yes, I do crave your soul-"
"I knew it! You-" he screamed.
"Stop talking for a second and think, Ciel!" he yelled back. They stared at each other heatedly, and the ice began to melt.
"You called me Ciel." he whispered.
"I apologize-"
"No, that's what I meant. You asked me what I thought was going to change. I thought you were going to forget that I was your contractor; just enough to want to know me; like a human being with a name."
"If that is what you desire."
"Why do you always do that? You always make me decided, and it's always about what I want."
"Of course. It is a servant's duty to put the master's wants first."
"If that is how it must be, then-" he squeezed his hand. "Tell me everything you want to without me ordering you to. Call me what you please. That's what I want."
"There are so many things." he said.
"It doesn't all have to be all at once," he said pleadingly,"but just a few things so I don't always have to guess."
"Then for now, you shouldn't feel insecure about me. I won't do or say anything I don't mean. Can that be enough, Ciel?"
"For now." he said and they sat next to each other in silence until it became dark and Ciel fell over from exhaustion. He curled up in Sebastian's arms and lost himself in what looked like pleasant dreams, making the demon grin and open his mind to his sub-conscience.

He didn't do it very often, but if it were an emergency or he saw an interesting expression on his master's sleeping face, he would force the walls he had constructed for their own sanity down and listened to him. Most demons could do this with their contractor, and they would communicate at will. The problem was with the convenience of their connection, there wasn't much privacy or control over what thoughts went where. A few minutes was manageable, but if the relationship was conflictual in general, it would tear the human's mind apart and could make for a long recovery in hell for the demon. Most of the time, he was able to get details of his location or their enemy, but every once and a while he would get enough out of it to last him an entire human lifespan of smugness. It was normal when considering his age, but it was interesting to see his fleeting fantasies, especially the ones with him in it.

He wished he could know for sure whether or not it was a real desire or not, for then none of his dreams would compare to what he was capable of. His master had only been kissed, and briefly, so his mind wasn't yet capable of arousing imagery.

That night was the first time he had seen something like this in the boy's dreams. It was similar to the nightmare he had so frequently, but this time, when he was bound and tortured, he didn't scream or cry. He didn't feel any despair.

"So it has been you." the Phantomhive said, but it wasn't the boy in the dream.
"Ciel?" he asked the surrounding darkness.
"Are you real?" Sebastian felt his master appear beside him and they watched the events unfold. "I've seen you here before, and if you are the real one, then I guess I was never able to figure it out. It's not like you to share anything you don't have to."
"How long have you been able to sense me?"
"I'm not sure, but when I sleep and you're here, there's always a part of me that wakes up. I don't remember ever being able to talk to you, though."
"No, you haven't."
"Then why now?" he asked, but Sebastian looked away and he sighed, "Is this something you'll tell me later, then?"
"Yes, later."
"You know, I don't normally remember my dreams. Do I have this one often?"
"This is the first time. Dreams like these are usually nightmares, but you- the other you- is perfectly calm."
"I think he's waiting for you." Ciel whispered.
"Me?" he asked and looked towards the center of the room. He saw himself in the corner, out of sight for Ciel's younger self. That was when he had been called.

He knew how it happened after that. He remembered that they formed the contract and he was covered in his captors' blood, but none of that happened this time. The men continued to abuse him and both dream-figures remained motionless.
"What are you doing?" Sebastian called out to himself. He forced Ciel's hands off his sleeve and ran forward. "You're being called! Go to him."
"Why would a puny brat like him mean anything to me?" his form asked, and the room began to be eaten by flames.
"You don't know what you're talking about. He's not like that."
"You're the one at fault here, going against your very nature. The world won't care if he dies. He's nothing, and it should stay that way. Why would I waste my power on something so insignificant?"
"Because you love him!"
"I know nothing of love. It is a pathetic emotion for humans. It makes them weak."
"No-" he said,"No, it makes them stronger. It gives them a purpose, a reason to live. Right now, you only exist. That isn't what you want, and he can change that. Are you just going to sit here and let him die?"
"You are me. We share the same mind, past or present we are the same, so you should understand."
"Yes, I do understand." he said,"but I still can't lose him!"

The flames rose even higher and almost reached the ceiling. He dashed to the table and tried to free his young master. He found his body bruised and tattered.
"Ciel? Can you here me; are you in pain?" he asked. The men that held him tried to discard of the demon, but he took them down almost immediately.
"It's ok, Sebastian. I'm not in any pain now that you've come for me," the little boy said. "but you should leave me now because they will only come back. They never die, you see?"
And he did. Their bodies were already reshaping.
"Then I'll keep fighting. I'll keep you safe."
"I don't want you to."
"What do you mean? I can't just leave you here."
"It's ok. I want you to be free."
"I can never be free without you." he finally undid the straps and carried him away in his arms.
"I hope you will be happy once I'm gone."
"You don't have to go anywhere," he said.
"Goodbye, Sebastian, and thank you for everything."
"Idiot! Didn't you just here me?" he looked back and saw part of the structure collapse. The air was filled with smoke and Ciel body went through some kind of fit.
"No," he said, but his master's eyes closed without his mark having appeared,"Please don't leave."
The body slowly decomposed in his arms and burnt from the flames. He embraced the empty shell of a body until it turned to ash and he fell with it to the ground.

"Where are you?" The dreamer called out. He lost sight of his butler long ago, and couldn't maneuver around the fire much longer. His vision was almost completely obscured by the smoke and it smelled of burnt flesh.
"Just tell me where you are already!" he cried out. Their game of tag was going to have to end before everything fell apart. He ripped his eye patch off and stood on top of a large pile of rubble.
"Sebastian! I order you to come to me." he yelled. In the middle of the room Ciel saw his own dead body and who was leaning over what was left.
He raised his voice and called out, but it was useless. He couldn't hear him and stayed hunched over in despair. Then he realized how they had come here in the first place, and put all of his willpower into his thoughts, sending them through their temporary connection.
'You still have a job to do, you know. Look up already!'
Finally, a response. Ciel waved his arms in the air when he saw the demon's eyes scan the room. Eventually, they traveled to him and he stared in awe.
'That's right. I'm not dead, so stop moping and come save me.'
He seemed to come out of it and hurried towards him, forging his own path through the flames.
"Master!" he cried, and pushed him forward as part of the ceiling collapsed. They lay together, holding on tightly to each other as the world slowly crumbled around them, and then there was nothing.