Demons Chapter 2: demons, a teen titans fanfic

Demons

Chapter 2

Beast Boy's POV

Dammit why had he been so careless he should of put his guard up before he went down he completely forgot she was usually already up by that time. He had to be more careful not only did he let her read his emotions but he got angry and said too much, now she would get suspicious and try to figure it out and that was something he couldn't let happen.

"She already has so much to deal with I don't want this to be another weight for her to carry" He said out loud.

When the days are cold
And the cards all fold
And the saints we see
Are all made of gold

It was always this day that he let his façade slip more, he guessed he just thought it was appropriate because it was were it all started to slip literally. He then moved over to his window and looked at the rain drops hitting the waters of Jump City bay.

"Hmm perfect weather to sum up today I guess."

When your dreams all fail
And the ones we hail
Are the worst of all
And the blood's run stale

The only reason he was even up this early is that he never really could sleep this night visions of blood and water clouded his dreams and made it impossible to sleep. Usually he would of just hung around his room until the time he usually got up then he put on his mask and went down to get brunch but today he slipped his stomach started growling and he was too tired to ignore it.

"Fatal mistake"

I wanna hide the truth
I wanna shelter you
But with the beast inside
There's nowhere we can hide

He knew it was only a matter of time before she found him even if he did escape the tower she still would be able to find find him. Ughh why did Raven have to be so Raven and why on earth did the world see fit to give the girl that cared so much empathic abilities. Like it wasn't bad enough that he let his façade slip when Terra betrayed them and when the beast came out but now she was going to find out everything and he didn't know how long he could hold his mask in front of her. That was the reason he hid from her this time every year he knew she was the only one that could get it out of him but the weight that would add to her he didn't bear thinking about.

No matter what we breed
We still are made of greed
This is my kingdom come
This is my kingdom come

He knew he didn't want her to know but part of him wanted her to find him.

"Man I'm so greedy. Why do I feel the need to have her all to myself, to have her listen to everything. I did it before with Terra and the beast why do I feel the need to add more weight to her burden."

"It's not greedy to want someone to pay attention now and then."

When you feel my heat
Look into my eyes
It's where my demons hide
It's where my demons hide
Don't get too close
It's dark inside
It's where my demons hide
It's where my demons hide

Ravens POV

She managed to get to Beast Boys room quite quickly after deciding and just stood there in front of his door. What was she going to say to him 'Oh sorry I was such a jerk before can I come and disturb you when you clearly don't want anyone to' how hypocritical would she be then. Then she heard a voice come through the door and a huge wave of self loathing hit her.

That was it she had enough of this there was no way she was going to stand around letting her friend feel like this so she teleported through his door and spoke up "It's not greedy to want someone to pay attention now and then."

He then turned around and she just look him straight in his eyes and then something unexpected happened she saw him slowly break down. First he tried to hide one tear, then another, then another, finally he just completely broke down and fell into her crying she was shocked at first but then she started to feel all the sadness that had been dwelling up inside him come charging at her and finally understood.

Curtain's call
Is the last of all
When the lights fade out
All the sinners crawl

Shared POV

As soon as he heard that he turned around and looked there stood raven the one he was trying to protect by keeping her away and the one he needed most of all. He was so shocked in that instant he tried to put on his mask and failed at every turn and then he just look into those amethyst eyes and broke. He fell into her crying his eyes out trying harder and harder to stop and put on the mask but every time he failed, he cursed her for doing this so easily.

"Why did you follow me, why did you have to know how to get through to me, why couldn't you just let me be." All this was said through muffled cries on her shoulder but she heard It perfectly.

Why was he saying these things why didn't he want her to help him, this she needed to find out but for now she needed to know why he was acting this way and help him "Beast boy what is going on, what is so different about today that it made you this way." All this did though was bring another wave of tears form his face to fall on her shoulder. After a couple of minutes like this he stopped crying and just stood there "Are you all right to talk about it now." He just looked up at her and nodded "Well then I think its best we sit down before we start and I think it might be better if we do it in my room after all if I'm going to listen I'm going to need to breath as well." This elicited a small laugh form him which gave her a small smile although it was hidden behind her hood "Lets go." she picked up Beast Boy and in a matter of seconds they appeared in Ravens room.

"Right lets start. What is so special about today that got you so worked up and what did you mean when you said 'only lasts today' does this happen every year. I know its nothing to do with Terra and the beast hasn't come forward since you know when so, what is it" He just sat there for a ages just looking at the floor she was about to give up when he spoke.

"Its to do with my past and its something that you shouldn't have to worry about." he said quietly lucky for raven she was used to being surrounded by quite that she had a good sense of hearing. It was then that she realised she knew nearly nothing about his past and neither did any of the team' none of them really thought the happy go lucky member of the team had a past worth crying about. What she didn't realise is that he had possible the most traumatic past out of the five of them except for Raven of course. "What do you mean about your past and why shouldn't I worry about it your my friend and you've helped me more times than any other. Why wont you let me help you?" Suddenly he shot up and spoke up.

"Because it's not your burden to bear."

"Why should you be able to decide what I can and cannot bear. Let me help you Beast Boy." She then stood up with him and looked into his eyes.

Damn her and those eyes why did she have to have them' so full of love and compassion and yet he was the only one who can see it she never would believe him if he told her. She always hid them under her hood and for the love of God he didn't know why and with one look into them he gave up. He sat down on the bed and put his head into his hands and sighed this was the day he was dreading this was the day he takes off the mask and shows her his demons.

So they dug your grave
And the masquerade
Will come calling out
At the mess you've made

How did he get himself into this mess how did he ruin such a perfect relationship with her now everything was going to change she was going to know him fully. He trusted her of course but he didn't want her to see him differently he was still the team clown but if she knew there was a reason for it and knew that sometimes he just put on an act then maybe she may not trust him.

Well it was too late to back out now "Well guess I can't hide it anymore. Rae can I ask you one thing though before I tell you."

"Yeh of course anything."

"Can you leave any Questions till the end when I've told you everything. This is going to be hard enough without any questions through it." He said exasperated.

"Of course." She had loads of questions but she knew they were now going to have to wait.

"Well first of all I never used to look like this and I never use to have any powers and I was just a normal boy with normal parents' well as normal as two super genius parents could be." raven just looked at him wondering what he could of possibly looked like when he was normal and as if he read her mind he then said "I used to have blonde hair. I know me blonde you cant possibly picture it." and then he let out a small chuckle it wasn't till the absence of his laughter this morning that raven realised how much she came to like it and rely on it as a sense of normalcy.

"That all changed though when I was four. You see my parents were scientist's studying animals and I grew up travelling the world visiting all kinds of natural habitats and learning about all different kinds of animals. That were some of the fondest memories I had of my parents and I loved every moment I had with them when I was a child." She could sense the sadness in his voice as he mentioned his life before " However things change one day I was in the jungle exploring the area my parents had camped in that day searching for the mysterious green monkey. Hmmph my typical luck we spent nearly two days looking for it in the jungle for two weeks and as soon as I go out alone I find one. By thins point I was accustomed to animals so I want afraid to go up to it and pet it but it freaked out and bit me on the arm then ran away. My parents heard my scream and came running luckily I wasn't to far away due to the fact they taught me not to stray to far from the camp at an early age. There they saw me laying on the ground clutching my bleeding arm and shivering even though it was 70 degrees outside. This was because the green monkey carried a newly discovered disease called Sakutia and it worked fast, really fast within minutes I was in cold shivers and sweats and I couldn't move from the spot I was in."

"My parents rushed me into the van and drove off as fast as they could to the research station my father was working at. Luckily for me though that research was on Sakutia and my dad had been tracking the monkey to discover this virus after he heard of the monkey and wondered if the disease is what made it green. So at the research station my Dad rushed through everything he had on the disease and searched high and low for anything that could help cure the disease and that was when he came across an untested antidote from when they first discovered the virus. All I can remember is him looking at me with eyes full of deep regret for what he was about to do and now I think about it I think he knew that he was risking his son's life on such an uncertainty. I did some research on the disease and I now understand why he did what he did he knew I had only an hour left and the antidote was my only chance. Thinking about the results I don't care I just wish I had a chance to say that I don't blame him. If anything I blame myself for what happened." He sighed and put his head into his hands again.

"All I can remember after he injected me with the serum was intense pain. Next thing I know I woke up and was like this. After a little panic attack my dad sat me down and told me that I was very sick and that my skin was a side effect of the medicine he gave him. He always knew how to explain something to me so I could understand." He smiled as he remembered his father fondly "A couple of weeks later me and my mother were out gathering supplies when a black mamba cornered us. That was the day I discovered another side effect. My powers. I turned into a mongoose like I had seen on the nature programs that we always used to watch on TV night. Next thing I remember is tasting blood. When I woke up my Dad told me I had changed into an animal to fend of the snake and saved me and my mother. I never saw him look so proud of me than he did that day I heard him say that I may not have a normal life like they imagined but he knew I was destined for great things. That was the last happy memory I have of them." I could see the tears rolling down his cheeks again but he wiped his eyes but one still managed to escape.

"That was because that was the last day I spent with my family when they were alive. It was this day 14 years ago when we took that boat trip." The next thing I know a full force wave of deep regret and anger flooded over me as Beast Boy stood and up and started to shout " It was my fault I wanted to go on that trip I should have listened to my Dad when he said there may be a storm coming. I could've of saved them but no I did what my father asked when he saw us heading for the waterfall. I transformed into the first thing with wings I could imagine. If I could do that I could've saved them." He then broke down all the collapsing into her yet again and every time a tear fell he repeated "I could've saved them." So she just sat there until it was over and he was ready again all the time holding onto him and tried to stop herself from breaking down as well. How could she not of known of his pain how could she not look past his playful exterior and understand like as he put it that he had demons too possibly even demons that equalled her own.

After he had regained some of his composure he went on "After I saw that boat go over the waterfall I knew my childhood had ended. But what was worse is that to get back to the research centre I had to fly over the waterfall. So I did and to this day that image Hasn't left my head."

"What image." I said not knowing whether I wanted an answer.

"A swirling pool of blood and water." After that he just stopped and sat there.

Don't wanna let you down
But I am hell bound
Though this is all for you
Don't wanna hide the truth

After a while I finally spoke up thinking that it must be over now "So that's why you hate this day. Its the anniversary of your parents death."

"Yeh." Was all that he said.

"It wasn't your fault Beast Boy your Dad was right to send you away he knew it was yet again the only way to save you." Then he stood up again.

"Yeh maybe but it was me that wanted to go on that trip anyway and it was me that persuaded my dad to go."

He shouted again not caring about if it might wake everyone up.

"So what suddenly a son can't want to spend some time with his family on a trip. It wasn't your fault it was a freak of nature." She said softly.

"What a freak of nature just like me. A freak who couldn't even save his own family."

"You know that's not what I meant. I meant that it was a terrible accident and it wasn't anyone's fault it's just the way things are some times." She had to be patient with him she knew that he needed to get out all of his self hate after all this was bottled up for years.

"An accident if it wasn't for me they would be alive right now. If it wasn't for me we might still be a family. If it wasn't for me beast boy may never of had to exist" Then he finally stopped and once again just sat there on the edge of her bed.

She had to ask "What do you mean Beast Boy may never of had to exist."

He sighed "It means that Beast Boy is a façade a mask for my true identity."

This struck her by surprise not only did he know the word façade but he also used it correctly "What do you mean by mask."

This was it no more hiding the truth the mask was about to be destroyed.

"It means that its a self defence mechanism I created to stop people from prying to much into my past. I guess subconsciously I thought if you thought me as the team jester then no one would bother about asking me. I took me a year or two to realise that I put it on then one day I just looked in the mirror and I didn't even look like me anymore. I mean even with out the mask I still tell corny jokes and pull pranks but with the mask on those become tools to throw you guys off the scent. There were times where I let the mask slip such as the beast incident when me and you were talking on my getaway island. Only to to the slip it back on which is why I ruined the moment by referring to myself as Beast Man just so you couldn't get close enough to see the mask. I didn't want anyone close especially not you. Now my mask is off and my demons are on show as well as many others yet to be discovered that I know you wont let be."

"Why did you not want me close to you especially."

"Because I knew you would be able to see through my mask and you already had so much weight to carry I could see it in your eyes the first day I met you adding mine to it seemed harsh. So instead I put on the mask and taught myself to hide my emotions like what you do with your meditating instead I used laughter and happiness to hide mine. Whenever I felt down I just focused my mind to think positive and push all those feelings back never confronting them. I teased you and constantly bugged you trying to find out what that weight was all the time trying to keep my mask on. I tell you now Rae I apologise for any time when I went over the top it was just stressful getting no were with you and all the while trying to make sure you didn't see through me. However I managed to focus on getting you to open up which to come to think of it was really hypocritical of me. I tried to make you do the things I wouldn't allow myself to do all the while reasoning with myself that it was for the best. Only now do I realise that no one should have to hide their emotions from their friends and no one should be anything then who they are. I'm sorry Rae for all the hiding I just hope you can forgive me and allow me to know the real you and to let me let you get to know the real me"

No matter what we breed
We still are made of greed
This is my kingdom come
This is my kingdom come

She just sat there bewildered was this the real beast boy she knew, of course not he practically just told her that but now she was wandering how much of Beast Boy was in this new person in front of her or whether this is just a mature Beast Boy that only acted like a boy for other peoples benefit. As she looked into his eyes she saw it, something she always missed when she looked before but now she looked deeper she saw it. How could she of been so blind behind the sparkle of green, maturity, maturity beyond his years due to the presence of a more than hard life, lessons needed to be learned quick and fast and with that brought the wisdom of a 30 year old man into the body of a teenager. She knew this because she too had to learn fast, it was the only way either of them could have survived the life they had been given. With that realisation she knew there were more lessons to learn one of them being how to feel again and she that was one they were going to have to learn together. But why was he apologising to him she was the one who was greedy only looking after herself she should have been begging him to forgive her for not noticing. It was then that she grabbed him for the first time and broke down.

When you feel my heat
Look into my eyes
It's where my demons hide
It's where my demons hide
Don't get too close
It's dark inside
It's where my demons hide
It's where my demons hide

"I'm sorry about not noticing this sooner. I'm sorry ive been so mean to you and called you immature and yet you may be the most mature out of all of us. Sacrificing your emotions to help me express mine and help me deal with my issues and through all that all I did was focus on saving myself not realising what you were going through." She couldn't control herself all of her emotions came forward and chaos was ensuing in the room.

At that point he grabbed onto her and started to stroke her back trying to stop her tears and her powers "stop Raven you have nothing to apologise for. We both messed up trying to hide ourselves from each other and by doing that we created this whole mess were in. Now try to relax and control yourself I know you've got a bit more control of your powers but this is too much at once."

She then relaxed and started to repeat her mantra all the while still holding onto him.

They say it's what you make
I say it's up to fate
It's woven in my soul
I need to let you go

After a couple of minutes she was back to normal but he was still holding her she knew she had to get away before she did something they both weren't ready for. She then separated herself from him and took her place back on her side.

He then spoke up "I know what has happened to us so far has been up to fate but I believe we now have the chance to make this right."

She couldn't believe how had he knew what was going through her mind and put it into the exact words she wanted to express "Yeh your right from now on no more mask's were both going to be true with each other and share our burdens. That is the only way we will be able to make this right."

"Yes and I think we should start off by telling each other everything about our pasts. But not now maybe we could just take an hour each day and just talk to each other and ask whatever has been on each others mind about our pasts."

"Agreed. That's a great idea."

Your eyes, they shine so bright
I wanna save that light
I can't escape this now
Unless you show me how

At that pint all he could see was the light in her eyes knowing that this would be the start of something they both wouldn't regret doing. From then on he knew he would be able to help her and in turn he knew she would do the save with him. From that thought he tried to shake the feeling of what would of happened is she wasn't his friend and maybe if they never met. He shook it out he wasn't going to go down that road.

When you feel my heat
Look into my eyes
It's where my demons hide
It's where my demons hide
Don't get too close
It's dark inside
It's where my demons hide
It's where my demons hide

After that final exchange Beast Boy got up to leave Ravens room for what felt like hours but what could not of been more than one. They exchanged one more hug before leaving and then just as he was about to go.

"Hey since your no longer Beast Boy what should I call you now."

"My real name is Garfield but I prefer Gar."

"Ok Gar you can call me Rae."

"I already do."

"Yeh but now you have permission to."

This is my first ever attempt at a fanfiction after spending a good year reading reading nearly the entire catalogue of this site on the teen titans especially BB/RAE. I just thought this was a good song to sum up there troubles and what each character has to go through. They aren't as opposite as some people may see them as I think they just have different ways of hiding there real emotions.

If you like this interpretation of their relationship please send me a review and if there are any severe grammatical errors please let me know. I am not the best typer in the world mainly due to the fact I did this in a spur of a moment kind of thing but I tried my best to make it understandable. If anything didn't make sense or if there are plot holes please let me know this is the first thing i've wrote in ages and I may of just got carried away.

If you would like me to continue this story or if you would like me to continue writing at all please let me know in the reviews.