A/N Thank you for your comments and compliments it really inspires my writing. So I know I promised Halloween but someone brought it to my attention to kind of address a few of the problems leading up to it…Enjoy!

Previously: She looked around and realized she wasn't in some parking lot but in her bed. She breathed heavily and grabbed a notebook sitting on her night stand. She opened to a new page and wrote everything she could remember. She looked at the page and was satisfied with what she had put down On the top of the page she scribbled a short sentence: dream or memory?

After the dream she had, Paige couldn't get much sleep. She stared at the ceiling playing back all the different dreams she had about Emily and her former life in Rosewood. Sometimes she wondered if they were really nightmares promising her things she could never get back. Since the day she left the hospital, Emily haunted every waking thought Paige had.

It had been 5 weeks since she was completely released from the hospital and her father wouldn't let her leave to go anywhere. Her only connection to Rosewood was through the internet and even that was limited. She had been continuing her classes online and that was the only time her father would led her use the internet. She had looked up different Newspaper articles on what had happened in the past few years and all these tragic events involved Ali's old group. When the information on her attack was fully released, nothing they told her meant anything. It was a bunch of names she didn't know mixed in with kids who went to her school. The only one that meant anything was Emily. She had convinced herself that Emily calling her, her girlfriend was all a part of the head trauma. She wasn't out to anyone. Honestly, she was barely out to herself. That is what led to Paige's ultimate decision to stay away from Rosewood until she got her memory back or at least came to terms with different things in her life. She couldn't be in a place where everyone else knew more about her life in the past two years than she did.

She still felt obligated to explain herself to Emily but she couldn't do it person. Instead, she had written a letter a few weeks ago thanking Emily for saving her life and asking her to give her some time to get her head together. Paige looked in the mail every day for some kind of response but a letter never came. Over the past weeks, nothing really came to Paige, she hadn't seen a single friend and her phone didn't work where they were so no one could text her. Her father told her that she would just be confused because her friends had changed and they all had their own things to deal with. It made sense but no contact with people her age started to nag at her.

"Paige, you have to eat something today!" Her mom called up the stairs breaking her thought process. She looked at the clock and it was already 9. She got up and looked in the mirror. She had changed a lot in the past month. Her hair was longer and less tamed, her eyes seemed to sink in a little more, and her body had gone from being toned from swimming to being much frailer. It wasn't that she did or didn't eat; she was just too tired to do anything. There was a piece of her missing and nothing could fill it, not even food.

Back in Rosewood

First period had been long over and the girls met in their usual spot on the patio. Hanna and Spencer usually got there first followed by Aria and depending on the day Emily. "How did she look today?" Aria sat down next to Hanna and they all shared concerned looks.

"I don't know she's on Emily duty today." Spencer wasn't completely paying attention because her phone was vibrating with texts from Toby. "I haven't seen much of her today but I talked to the swim coach and she hasn't missed a practice in the last month, so that must be a good sign."

"I talked to her mom again last night and it's been the same, no letters, no emails, not anything. She even tried calling Paige's dad but apparently he took a sabbatical to God knows where." Hanna had been keeping the closest tabs on Emily but it was so hard to tell how she was doing. She always said she was fine and acted normally around everyone but Hanna could tell there was something wrong. Somehow, Emily had lost the glow that always seemed to surround her.

Spencer interrupted their Emily update with her own personal problems. "Ok so we have an issue. Toby wants to go to the Halloween train thing but I don't think that's such a good idea."

"Please tell us why." Aria rolled her eyes and pretended to care. "Come on guys a moving train, in the dark, on Halloween, that screams A."

"Spencer we haven't heard from A in like a month and a half. I really don't think they will encroach on your Toby fest."

"I know, but it seems like I always have this feeling that they're watching me, it makes my hair stand on end. And if it's no big deal why don't you come with us?"

"Fine, Hanna are you in?"

"I don't care but only if we convince Emily. God knows she needs a night out." They all laughed but sadly they knew she needed something to take her mind off Paige.

Meanwhile

Emily was on the last turn of her 500 and she knew she was on a fast pace. Unlike most long distances, she decided not to breathe every stroke and power on her turns. The burn in her arms was the only thing anymore that made her feel alive. She slammed her hand in the wall and looked at the clock. She had beaten her best time by 3 seconds and she silently celebrated the victory.

"Fields, that's enough today, if you push anymore you're going to hurt yourself." Emily looked around and everyone was making their way to the locker room. She had made it a habit to wait until everyone was finished in the locker room before she got out. It was her way of escaping their looks. "Coach, can I at least do a cool down, you don't want me leave all that lactic acid in my muscles." She agreed and Emily started her set.

As much as she loved the pool it could also be her greatest enemy. Everything there was a reminder of what she was missing and her thoughts ran freely in the silence. She finished her cool down and made her way to the locker room. Like she planned it, everyone was gone and she was able to shower in peace. She had bought the same shampoo Paige used and scrubbed it into her scalp. As the water ran down her body, the heat created a steam cloud around her that emanated chlorine and lavender. She knew this was the real reason she wanted to shower alone. One by one tears streamed out of her eyes and mixed in with the soap from her hair. It was like an instant reaction whenever she came in here because it smelled like Paige. There was something unique about the combination of pool water and flowers. They didn't necessarily complement each other but instead they blended together to form a smell that Emily could only describe as Paige like. Standing under the shower was the best way to reminisce because every moment they had ever shared was infused with lavender and chlorine. It was like the glue that held them together. Emily heard the locker door open and she quickly put a towel on and tried composing herself.

"Em, Coach said you were still in here" The footsteps came closer and Hanna appeared around the corner. "Hey, are you ok?" Emily knew her eyes were probably still red but she had worked too hard the past weeks to convince everyone she was ok and she wasn't giving up now.

"Yeah, my goggles broke midway through practice so I had to swim without them. The chlorine really got to me today." Hanna could tell she way lying because her goggles were laying on the bench in one piece, but she let it go.

"So tomorrow they are doing the train thing for Halloween and I thought it would be fun if we all went. It's been awhile since we had any girl time."

"Hanna, I don't know. A night out with a bunch of strangers in scary costumes isn't really my idea of fun. I have had a lifetimes worth of creepy people and I'm pretty sure there is a Grey's Anatomy episode calling my name."

"I promise this isn't the scary kind of party. It'll just be a bunch of girls dressed in minimal clothing and some horn dog athletes trying to get some."

"Is that supposed to make it better?" They both laughed picturing some of their classmates.

"I promise to do whatever you want. I will sit with you in the back making fun of everybody else, I will be your ridiculously awesome dance partner, hell I'll even sing karaoke with you if that's what it takes."

"No singing. I'll go and dance or whatever, but no singing." Hanna pretended to have an invisible notepad, jotting things down. "No…singing…got it, anything else for my list."

"No alcohol, Please because If I start I don't think I can stop." Hanna proceeded to scribble her finger across her hand. "Check and Check, now after school we need to find you the perfect outfit." Emily rolled her eyes and started to get changed. When she opened her locker an envelope fell out onto the floor. Hanna picked it up before Emily could reach for it. "Oh my God Em, you got a letter from Paige? When did that happen?" Emily tried to reach for it but Hanna turned her back to her and opened the well-worn envelope.

"It was a while ago, ok. Pleased give it back." She once again reached for it and Hanna let go.

"At least tell me what it says. Is she doing better, is she starting to remember?" Emily faced her locker, avoiding eye contact because the tears began forming again. The letter said the exact opposite of what Hanna was asking. Emily had kept this from her friend for almost a month and now was as good a time as ever to show it to her.

"If I let you see this, you have to promise not to judge me, or her, or anything, ok? This is the only thing she has sent and it might be the only thing she will ever send." Hanna rested her hand on her shoulder. "Come on, I promise I won't say anything." Emily held the letter in her hand and held on tightly. Her eyes glanced over the familiar paragraph that she had read a hundred times. She and Paige had been together on and off for a year and all she got was a few passing thoughts in a typed note. "I think it would be better if I read it to you." Hanna nodded and led Emily to the bench. They both sat down and Hanna continued to hold her hand as she began.

"Dear Emily,

Somehow I think there were a thousand reasons why I should have stayed in Rosewood with you, but in my head I can't picture a single one. The last weeks, have been a battle between what I'm being told and what is in my heart. I look around and see the world differently and it scares me. It's like I woke up in someone else's body but I have to be accountable for everything that person did. Losing my memories has made me take into consideration all these life choices "I" supposedly made. I was told we were together and that is why you saved my life, so I thank you for that, but I have been granted this clean slate and I think I'm going to take it. For now, I can only go on what I feel and this is what seems right. As much as this may hurt, please respect my decision.

Best Wishes, Paige

The first few times Emily read the letter she cried uncontrollably but now she felt nothing. Hanna on the other hand was teary eyed and confused.

"All this time you knew she wasn't coming back?" Emily nodded and folded the letter up.

"Did you try sending something back or looking up the address?"

"It was sent from a P.O. Box at a post office somewhere up north, with no return address."

"So what now?"

"Now, we keep going. Tonight we may pick out some costumes and tomorrow we'll do it all again because that's life."

"Are you going to wait for her?"

"I don't know. I have never felt like this before. It's like there is this piece of me missing that I never knew I had until I was with her and now I don't know how to get it back without her."

Hanna continued to leak tears and hugged her passionately. "Honey, I think they call that love."

Back at the Lake House

Paige walked down stairs and sat at the bar of their lake house. It was kind of peaceful out there. There was a primitive feel to her environment and it did make her feel more relaxed. Her mom began filling her plate with various breakfast foods that she knew she was just going to push around.

"Your Trig teacher emailed me back said if you keep working this course you will be caught up when you go back?" Paige had been home schooling while she recovered. It wasn't any harder than school but she was constantly surprised at the things she knew without really remembering learning them.

"So when is that?" Paige continued to push food around her plate, occasionally putting a piece of egg in her mouth.

"When is what honey?"

"The me going back to Rosewood" Every time Paige brought up going back her parents made some excuse about how convenient living here was or the doctors recommended against it.

"You know the doctor said too much stress could hurt you and can you imagine going back to school and everybody asking questions about where you've been?" By now, Nick had come down for breakfast too and had heard the back end of the conversation.

"I thought everyone kind of knew what was happening; didn't you send a letter to the principal?" Nick walked behind Paige's chair and kissed her on the top of the head before sitting down in the other bar chair.

"Of course we did, but that doesn't mean people won't ask. As far as they know, one of Emily Fields exes attacked you and you are recovering from that."

Paige rolled her eyes because her dad misspoke about the situation every time they talked about it. She had never got all the details but she figured it would be better if she didn't for now.

"I'm going to go to rehab at the pool and then I'm heading to stay with Aunt Jess for the next two nights remember." Her Aunt Jess was her mom's sister but was closer in age to Paige. She had been her only friend over the past weeks and it was the only non-rehab place Paige was allowed to go because she lived out in the country by some old train tracks.

"Yeah she is going to pick you up from rehab and we'll see you Sunday."

Paige ran upstairs and grabbed her bag for the weekend. She rifled through some papers on her desk until she found the one she was looking for. It was a flyer she had found on the internet when looking up the newspaper articles. She had never heard of a Halloween party on a train but she knew it would attract some Rosewood kids. One of the stops was by her Aunt's house and they had elaborately planned how she could stay on the train until it reached that stop and her parents would never know. She needed answers and the best way to do it was a place where you could be whomever you want.

She got everything together and walked out the front door. In less than 48 hours she was going to have answers, no matter the cost.

a/n Costume suggestions? Also, sorry for the update delay school is a biatch. Any plot mistakes I made or inconsistency you see PLEASE PM me so I don't do it again. And the time might be a little wanky but just go with it