On The Way Back Home

What would you think if I sang out of tune
Would you stand up and walk out on me?
Lend me your ears and I'll sing you a song
And I'll try not to sing out of key

- The Beatles, With A Little Help from My Friends

After spending two weeks at the hospital, Barney was pronounced healthy enough to go home. They had already determined amongst themselves that Barney would be staying with Lily and Marshall at Dowisetrepla, so that Lily could look after him before the school term commenced in September. Once Lily returned to work, Robin and Ted would share the time between them since Robin worked her early morning (more like middle of the night) schedule, and Ted often had breaks between his teaching days at the college.

"So he can go home on Friday?" Lily confirmed again with the doctor as he conducted his daily morning check on Barney on Wednesday. Dr. Morrison nodded, gently pulling down Barney's gown where he had been examining his surgical wound from the spleen removal.

"Yep, he looks like he's making good progress, and provided he is able to receive sufficient care at home, it should be safe to discharge him this Friday. Of course, he will need to maintain follow up appointments and physiotherapy with his own doctor in New York. I've already sent the files over to Dr. Taylor who will be taking over his case," he informed them, reaching out to ruffle Barney's hair. "And I expect that you to behave for Dr. Taylor, young man!" he exclaimed to a giggling Barney, who nodded in reply.

"Okay now, turn over," the doctor ordered, helping Barney onto his side so he could access his patient's back. Lily saw that most of Barney's wounds were closed and healing, except for two open patches near his lower back.

"Do those need to be closed up?" she asked, reaching out to hold his hand as the doctor gently tugged the dressings off.

"No, these are too wide to be stitched up, but they're healing well. We'll provide you with the brochures on open wound care. His carer will need to help him clean and change the dressings when he baths and they should heal up in a couple more weeks to a month," he replied, now applying antiseptic to the wound with a syringe. "Hold still kiddo," he chided his patient, who had shifted away in protest from the stinging pain. Lily felt Barney's grip tighten on her hand as he stilled his body, a whimper escaping from his throat. She squeezed his hand back reassuringly, and handed him his stormtrooper doll. Reasonably pacified, he held the doll tightly, burying his face into the soft material.

"So Barney, I bet you're looking forward to going home," the doctor conversed, trying to draw his charge's attention away from what he was doing. Barney shook his head, grunting out some intelligible sounds but otherwise remaining silent.

"No?" the doctor asked him in mocked surprise. Lily smiled sadly.

"He's just upset because his brother is leaving on Friday as well," she spoke for him, ruffling his hair as he pouted at her.

Friday soon arrived, and morning found a tearful Barney having to farewell James, who was leaving to pick up their mother Loretta, and return with her to his home in Washington. The police had informed them of the possibility of Barney's attacker targeting James and Loretta as well, so James felt it was best to have Loretta stay with him and Tom while Ryan was still on the loose. He initially wanted to take Barney too, but the hospital psychologist advised it was more therapeutic for Barney to remain in New York and in the surroundings he was familiar with prior to his regression, and Lily had convinced James that Barney would be fine under their care. So, James reluctantly said goodbye to his little brother, holding him as he sobbed and protested with heartbreaking whimpers of "no" and "don't leave me, please".

"I'm sorry Barnaby, I have to go. Lily, Marshall, Ted and Robin will still be here, they'll take good care of you, okay?" he soothed, gently trying to pry himself away from Barney's grip, but his brother held fast.

"No, I want James," he sniffed, fresh tears soaking into James' suit, "and Mommy... I want James and Mommy..."

"I'll bring Mom, Tom and Eli over to visit you at Christmas, how about that?" he bargained now, finally managing to release himself from his brother's arms.

"No," Barney pouted, crossing his unbroken arm around his cast to glare defiantly at James. Sighing, James bent down to look at his brother face to face.

"Come on Barney, I explained this. I need to go because Mom, Tom and Eli need me right now, okay? And you need to stay in New York and get better."

Barney stared into James eyes for a full minute, processing his words. Finally, he sighed, looking away as he whispered, "But I'll miss you."

James smiled, reaching out to stroke his brother's soft blonde hair. "I'll miss you too Barnaby, but you can call us whenever you need to, and I'll keep emailing you updates of Eli, okay? He's growing up so fast!" he exclaimed proudly. Barney reluctantly nodded, although more tears slid down his cheeks.

"Hug?" he questioned now, reaching out to James again.

"Of course," James answered him, pulling him into his embrace and softly stroking his back. Barney buried his face into the soft material of his brother's suit, breathing deeply to take in the scent of his perfume. James held his brother for a few more minutes before untangling himself from Barney, bending down to place a kiss onto his temple. Lily entered just as James stood back up to leave.

"Be good for Lily, okay?" he told his brother, giving him one last pat on the shoulder and smiling to Lily before he exited the room, luggage in tow. Lily went over to stand by Barney as they watched James leaving out the door and down the corridor, pulling him into her arms when she saw his tear streaked cheeks.

"You ready to go home sweetie?" she asked him now, cupping his face under the chin to face her. He sniffed, pulling away from her.

"Come on," she spirited, "let's pack your stuff. Robin and Ted will be here to pick us up in an hour."

Barney was sullen and quiet the whole way back to New York. Robin and Ted had gone back to pick up Ted's car so the five of them could travel home together instead of having to take separate cabs. Throughout the drive they tried to keep up the sparse conversation, but it was difficult to maintain with their main charge sulking in the middle seat between Lily and Marshall, mouth pouting, gripping his stormtrooper like there was no tomorrow. Lily sighed in relief when they finally pulled up in front of Barney's apartment, hoping that maybe being back home and being back in familiar surroundings would bring his mood back up, while she took the opportunity to pack some of his clothes to bring to Dowisetrepla.

"Home sweet home Barney!" she exclaimed excitedly to him as they helped him through the door. The cuts on his feet were still healing so it was still painful for him to walk long distances and up stairs without support. He frowned as he walked in, his eyes displaying a hint of apprehension that confused her. Hesitantly, he hobbled over to the couch, fingering the expensive leather lightly before taking a seat, seemingly lost in his own world. Robin took the seat beside him, taking his hand into hers. He glanced across to her and smiled shyly, much to Lily's amusement. Everyone else stood around awkwardly until Marshall broke the moment, suddenly clearing his throat.

"Hmm... so... we better get going," he beckoned to Ted and Robin. "I mean... we have that very important—"

"I need to go to the bathroom," Barney's soft voice interrupted him. Robin rose to help him, but he pushed her hands away, hobbling into the bathroom on his own and locking the door behind him. The friends exchanged worried glances.

"Maybe we should—" Ted spoke up.

"No," Lily interrupted him, "you guys go and get everything ready, I'll pack his stuff. He's probably just still missing his brother, and the best way to cheer him up is to just get him home and give him the welcome he deserves," she ordered, pushing them out the door.

"So I'll come back and pick you guys up in half an hour?" Marshall turned to ask before he went out. Lily nodded, kissing her husband goodbye and shutting the door behind him. Sighing softly, she pulled the suitcase containing the few possessions Barney had from the hospital into the bedroom, mainly some small gifts and cards from well wishing nurses and hospital staff, as well as some extra packets of bandages, gauze and antiseptics the doctor provided, and opening it to fill it with the necessary items. Her eyes scanned the room, hovering over the door to the room of suits, before spying the set of drawers in the corner. She knew Barney kept his suits at a constant temperature and humidity setting in the room, and hence his normal clothes would probably be more likely placed in the drawers. Pulling open the bottom drawer first, she found some sweat pants and hoodies, most likely for when he went on his morning runs every week (aside from "investing" in the gym, Lily knew Barney didn't actually work out at a gym, preferring the open space and freedom of going on a morning run when he could – of course, she'd been sworn to secrecy of this little fact, and since it was rather trivial and never really brought up, she had actually managed to keep this one to herself). Having placed the four sets of sweats he owned into the suitcase, she proceeded to open the second drawer, smiling when she spied Marshall's night shirt amongst his other sleep clothes, mainly T-shirts and boxer shorts, and a couple of sets of his "suit-jamas". Taking the T-shirts and boxers, she left the others, adding proper pajamas into her mental shopping list of things they still needed for Barney. Finally, she pulled open the top drawer, in hopes of finding some socks for him, but was greeted by a perfectly organized and color co-ordinated tray of ties and belts, each neatly placed in its own compartment. Shaking her head in amusement, Lily was about to close the drawer back when she spied upon the small black box, inconspicuously placed into the back corner. Knowing it wasn't really her in her place, and that Barney would probably kill her if he ever found out, regressed or not, curiosity got the better of her, and she reached in to slide it forward, agile fingers swiftly undoing the clutch and opening the lid. There were a number of small items in it, a ring, a small bow-tie, a postcard, a photo of Barney as a child, grinning happily with a violin and bow in his hands, and a small piece of paper facing downwards. Lily picked it up, eyes widening when she realized where the paper was from, the familiar neat handwriting, three bold words printed across it – 'Boyfriend & Girlfriend'. She sighed, thinking of the implications, the excitement she would've felt had she seen the contents of this box a few weeks earlier... before everything happened, before her insecure, hard-headed, yet vulnerable adult friend became an insecure and very vulnerable child – though possibly just as hard-headed as ever if today was any indication, Lily thought with a grin. Thinking she had better check on Barney (she realized she hadn't heard from him ever since he went to the bathroom ten minutes ago), she quickly placed the contents back into the box, closing the drawer.

"Barney?" she called out, slightly worried when there was no response. Walking out into the hall she was surprised to see the bathroom door opened, no Barney in sight.

"Barney? Where are you?" she tried again, wandering out into the living area. It was empty. Lily felt her breath hitch, her heart speeding up at the idea at a terrified Barney lost in New York City... or worst yet, kidnapped... again. Taking a deep breath to steady herself, she quickly raced to the door, heaving relief when she found it was locked and bolted from the inside. "Okay, so he must be in the apartment somewhere," she reasoned to herself, walking back down the hall into the empty bedroom. "Think Lily... there's only one room left." Her eyes shifted to the second room, the suit room. Of course. It was inconspicuous, but during the time she lived at Barney's apartment, she had discovered that the suit room actually had two entries, the regular door from Barney's bedroom making it essentially a walk-in closet, and another entryway hidden behind a glazed glass panel in the hallway. Crossing her fingers tightly, she pulled open the door, blinking as her eyes adjusted to the dim-lit room filled with suits of every style and color imaginable. He was in the corner, huddled, his unbroken arm wrapped tightly around his knees, head buried, shaking.

"Barney?" she asked, hesitant. His reaction was instantaneous, head lifting, tear-filled blue eyes widening at her presence, a sob escaping his lips before he launched himself at her. She caught him just in time, his fall bringing them both down onto the ground, and she felt his arm grip tightly around her, his body heaving with every broken sob that escaped his throat, his tears soaking through her shirt. She felt frozen for a moment, lost as to what had happened, but soon allowed the mothering nature inside of her to take over. Wrapping her arms carefully around him, she held him, rubbing him gently on his back to soothe out the tension, small shushing whispers of comfort flowing from her lips. She soon felt the sobs slow down, his breath evening out into a more steady flow, broken only occasionally by hiccoughs of tears left over. Slowly, she shifted away from him, lifting his face to look into his eyes.

"What happened?" He looked away, eyes darting around the room before landing on her again, as if convincing himself of the reality of her presence.

"I... I thought... everyone had gone... and I was alone." Suddenly his eyes widened, scared. "Please don't leave me, please... I... I don't... I can't... please..." he begged, scanning her own eyes in plea. She pulled him towards her again, holding him as tight as she could without hurting him.

"Barney... of course we're not going to leave you... Marshall's coming to pick us up later... where did you think we were going to go?"

"I thought... you said, go home... and this is my home... and here it is just me," he answered her, voice shaking. Lily smiled softly, shaking her head when she finally realized what had happened. No one had told Barney he was staying with her and Marshall when he went home, and Barney, being Barney, abandonment issues abound even as an adult, and probably even more so with the mind of a child, had just assumed that he was going home – his own home – by himself. Suddenly the sullenness, the sulking, the attachment to James, it all made sense. She turned his face towards her again, affectionately stroking his cheek with her thumb.

"Barney, of course we're not leaving you here by yourself! You're coming to live with me and Marshall at our apartment. We're only here to pick up your clothes before we go sweetie," she told him, kissing him on the forehead as he snuggled into her shoulder. "Plus, didn't James tell you that we will be looking after you? Now how can we take good care of you if we leave you here by yourself?" She felt him nodding against her, the hint of a smile tugging at the corner of his lips.

"So," she announced now, pulling him away to stand up and helping him to his feet as well, "let's get your things packed and ready before Marshall comes back for us, okay? I need your help finding your socks, where on earth do you keep them mister?"

He giggled, taking her hand and pulling her into his bedroom before pointing at a drawer hidden beneath a lit display of comic book models.

"Lily..." he spoke up shyly as she started to fill the open suitcase with pairs of the most expensively branded socks she had ever seen.

"What is it sweetie?"

"Can... can I bring my big stormtrooper, too?"

Marshall had arrived back in half an hour as promised, and they had helped Barney back downstairs into the car, filled suitcase in tow. Lily had convinced Barney that he only needed one stormtrooper, and if he was going to be taking his plush stormtrooper doll with him to Dowisetrepla, then they were leaving the life size model at the apartment. Barney had taken his time contemplating which stormtrooper he wanted to bring, scaring Lily for a moment there, but luckily he had grown extremely attached to his plush stormtrooper doll in the past week and ended up reluctantly hugging his life-sized one goodbye.

"You want a piggy back, big guy," Marshall asked now. They were on their way up to the apartment and he had noticed Barney's increasing discomfort of being on his feet. Barney paused, eyes longing, but somehow shy.

"Come on Barney, it's okay, Marshall won't mind," Lily told him, noticing his hesitation. She pulled him over as Marshall bent down and helped him up onto her husband's back. Marshall wrapped both arms tightly around Barney's knees before rising up, cheekily bouncing his cargo.

"Giddy-up!" Marshall hollered, before bounding up the stairs dramatically, causing Barney to giggle in glee. Lily laughingly followed behind them, grinning proudly when Marshall pretended to buck and neigh as he stopped in front of their door (her husband was going to be a wonderful father one day). It only took one knock for the door to open, flying confetti and streamers as Ted and Robin yelled "SURPRISE!" to welcome their guest of honor. Barney's jaw dropped open in amazement and wonder, eyes scanning the apartment to take in the banner, snacks and cakes they had prepared for him. Lily placed her arm around him, holding him after Marshall lowered him to the floor.

"For me?" he whispered, a delighted grin decorating his features, eyes lit up like it was Christmas morning. She pulled him into her, giving him a comforting squeeze.

"Yes, welcome home, Barney."

Author's Note: Hi all, thanks for everyone who reviewed! I know it's been a long long long time since I last updated. Thing is, I moved to a new city with a new job in March, and didn't actually manage to get my home internet connected until now (I know, it's ridiculous), so I couldn't upload any updates (okay, I've also been a bit of a slacker on the writing front -_-).

Anyways, now I finally have internet, so hopefully the updates will be much quicker! :D

Thanks for reading!