"Nnoitra…." Szayel stared at the stars overhead. "Did we land?"
"Yes." He replied, his whole world turning. "In a bed, most ironically."
"...Oh… really?" Szayel murmured, knowing what to say next. "Interesting… but no."
"I wasn't even going to ask, you weirdo." Nnoitra snickered, finding the whole thing funny. "Anyhow… I'm really tired."
"Me…too…" Szayel slurred, not sure if he actually said what he wanted to. "And… We have to get...reservation… Hotel..."
"Yeah…and can't mantis fly?" Nnoitra continued talking through his own laugher. "and...We need a…reser…" The two slumped onto the pillows, unconscious.
"Tia!" Aaroniero screamed at her, through their visual connection. "Are you there?! Aweser me! AHHH! You've been ignoring me for the last ten minutes! Help me please! I got Telsa and Rud out of the trunk and I think that Szayel and Nnoitra crashed through the roof or something! I sent Rud and Telsa to go check it out for me!" He made his way out of the parking garage a few blocks from the hotel where Ned parked the car with all their swords in hand. " And I don't know what to do! Help me! Please!"
"I'm here." Tia muttered once she closed Garganta and began to walk towards Hueco Mundo "I was just in Soul Society for a meeting and a hostage exchange. What do you need?"
"I said that-" Aaroniero froze on the sidewalk and peered upwards. "Oh…big… big hollow…Tia?!"
"You're an Espada." She stated coldly. "Take it out. That's an order."
"Yes, ma'am."
"Miss." Tia corrected, "Ma'am makes me sound like an old maid."
"You are certainly not." Aaroniero brandished Santa Teresa that he had to carry by hand as it did not have a sheath. "And I hope you don't mind, Nnoitra…Not that you will and-"
What are you doing?! Get your hands off me!
Aaroniero almost dropped Nnoitra's sword. Did you just-
Help! I'm captured by a Hollow! Help me! Help- wait! Who are you?
"Um….Who are you?"
I'm Ruri'iro Kujaku!
"Ruri who?!" Aaroniero screamed, realizing it was the stupid soul Reaper's sword talking to him. He had put it on his belt along with the other swords and hadn't payed much attention to it.
Until it started talking!
Ruri'iro Kujaku! I am Yumichika's Zanpakutō! Let me go this mo…wait a minute…I…I know you!
"You do?!" The Fifth Espada wanted to kill this hollow, run to the nearest lake and dump the talking sword before it started singing or something.
Yes! Oh my… I.. I am besides myself! It's you, Kaien! I thought you were dead! I… I am overjoyed!
"Uh… I'm… so…" Aaroniero looked from the Hollow who was just as shocked and back to the sword. "Glad? Um… Hey…" He began, an idea coming to mind. "Would you help me get rid of this hollow here?"
Of course! I am just so thrilled! Wait until I tell my master!
"Ah…" Aaroniero set Santa Teresa down and drew Ruri'iro Kujaku who was still singing praises to Kaien Shiba's existence. "Nice…Thanks. And here we…" Aaroniero leapt into the sky towards he enemy, "Go." He arc'd the blade downwards and sliced right through the Hollow's mask with a loud crack.
"Ah." Aaroniero smiled to himself, landing on his feet on the sidewalk next to Santa Teresa; the Hollow disappearing before his very eyes. "That went well. Now…" He put Ruri'iro Kujaku away and picked up Nnoitra's blade. "Did you like that?
Very much. Ruri'iro Kujaku laughed happily. But I am confused, Shiba-san. I tried to talk to the other swords I see, but they are not talking. Why is that?
"Um…" Aaroniero pressed the cross walking button on the street corner. "Because they are sleeping."
But we never sleep!
"This is a new kind of… sword and they sleep."
I'm not buying it. And… now that I think of it… What did you do with Kaien Shiba?
Aaroniero froze in the middle of the crosswalk of a busy intersection. "What?!"
What did you do with Kaien Shiba?! I feel his presence! But I know he's not you!
"Get out of the road!" Someone screamed as a chorus of car horns sang in the night. "Get your ass moving, Grandpa!"
"Yeah!" Aaroniero gave stalled audience the finger. "I'm gonna move! So shut the hell up!"
You have a temper, don't you?! Anger isn't good!
Can you hear me?
Yes. Perfectly. I don't know how.
Neither do I. Aaroniero marched across the road as slow as possible just to annoy all those who waited. But I do know one thing. I am Aaroniero Arrurueire, the Fifth Espada and I not hesitate to snap you in half if you don't shut up right now.
But, I thought you were Kai-
I said, shut up.
You cannot boss me around, hollow! I am a Zanpakutō!
Hollow?! Aaroniero was more offended than he had been in a while by anyone. Even Szayel and Nnoitra never called him something so rude. "I am a Gillian!"
Everyone in the hotel lobby looked up from their tasks.
He looked around and grinned nervously. "I mean… Well… I love Gilligan's Island! Did you hear it is on at eight tonight?"
"And what,"
AAroniero turned to see a hotel Security Guard standing next to him with a cross look on her face. "Are you doing with those swords?"
"These?" Aaroniero pointed to the collection on his belt. "I'm…" What's the word?! What does Yylfordt do?! Oh. Yeah. "I'm a Cosplayer and these swords are part of my groups outfits."
"I see…" The woman didn't seem very convinced as she continued to note how real these swords looked.
"Well, that's because we had them all…handcrafted for our characters."
"And who… may I ask, are you cosplaying?"
"Um…" Aaroniero knew a few animes… but none with swords like these. "Um… The name's really long. Japanese you know. You know… "
At that moment, the cleaning maid went by with his cart full of supplies and a name hit Aaroneiro in the face.
It was a strange name.
And hell, an anime didn't even exist by this name anyhow.
But it was worth a shot.
"Bleach."
"Bleach? Is this a joke?"
Aaroniero shook his head. "No, miss. These swords come from Bleach characters and-"
"What is the show about?" Ned asked, coming over to get a closer look at the huge nine foot monster sword. "I watch a little bit of Anime myself because of my kids being into Pokemon and all."
"Bleach?" Aaroniero laughed, not sure what to say. "You want to know what its about?"
"Yeah. And who do you guys all play?"
"Um… Bleach is…" About cleaning products who battle it out with swords? Nah… too silly. "It's a really complicated plot see… there is this guy… Aaroniero Arrrureire. He…" What am I? Oh yeah! "He's the awesome main character! He goes around the world and um… destroys scary monsters with his slaying sword… and the monsters are called…Um… What is it? Oh yeah. Soul Reapers. Big, scary… rather ugly… and Aaroniero, who I play… has two…friends called Nnoitra and Szayel and we go around getting rid of scary-"
"What did you say?" Ned interrupted Aaroniero's train of though that was heading into loony land central by now. "Did you say… Notra? And Sessel?"
"No, no…" Aaroniero laughed, knowing the names were hard to pronounce. "Its Nnoitra and Szayel. Aaroniero's trusty friends."
"Oh!" Ned finally understood. "That makes sense! 'Cause I heard Romeo and Theresa using those names in the video. Nicknames do catch on don't they?'
"Yeah…" Aaroniero completely forgot that Szayel and Nnoitra used their real names back when the lizard 'attacked' them. "They do! So, yeah and…so that's what Bleach is."
"Cool!" Ned grinned, his anger over the car incident gone for good. "And so, what are these swords exactly?"
"Um… This one…" Aaroniero glanced up at Nnoitra's towering blade. "This one is… Nnoitra's sword. And this here, is Szayel's and these two are mine."
"Nice! Can I see one?"
"Um…" Aaroniero didn't know what to say besides, "not really. They are kind of expensive."
"But they are so cool!"
Aaroniero was about to say no when Telsa appeared next to him with a worried look on his face. The Fraccion bowed before saying, "Lord Aaroniero-sama, I have good news and bad news. Good news is, Szayel and Nnoitra are here in the hotel. Bad news, they fell through the roof and their Gigais are totaled and I think that Rud, I mean-"
"Just go on!" Aaroniero muttered, handing Ned a sword to keep him distracted as much as possible from the conversation with 'Mr. Invisible.'
"Rudbornn says that the two are in need of immediate healing. So I need you to go get Lumina from the car and bring it to-"
"I don't have to carry that suitcase ever again!" Aaroniero told Telsa, "They promised!"
"I know, Lord Aaroniero-sama. But we need you to. Just this once. I will make sure they repay you! Because if Master Nnoitra dies… I will start writing fan fiction."
"What?" The Fifth Espada was confused. "What is fan fiction?"
"Fan written stories. Some are very good while some are really bad. Aka, My Immortal. But, in these stories, the writer can put anyone they want together romantically."
"And… how is this a threat?"
"Because," Telsa folded his hands behind his back, a small grin creeping onto his face as the slot machine of characters whirled in his head. "I will write a story about how you, Aaroniero fall madly in love with Szayel after Nnnoitra's untimely death."
"Um… did I just hear you correctly? Me and… Szayel?"
"Yes. You did. And to make things worse, I will make all of the guys in Heuco Mundo fall in love with you too and so it will be giant love tri-"
"But I want a girlfriend!" Aaroniero protested.
"Exactly." Telsa snatched Taylor's tablet while she was busy watching her father play with Yumichika's sword. "And this…" He pulled up a website. "Is Fan Fiction. Read."
"Okay…"Aaroniero took the small device and read the summary out loud. "One winter night… Grimmjow finds a Ulquiorra in the desert and the two share many secrets….GrimmUlqui Lemon warning." He glanced up at Telsa. "What is a lemon?"
Telsa didn't reply. Instead he made Aaroniero start reading. "And take in mind… this is…"
"OM…G…. What…" Aaroniero's eyes were burned in the back of his head by what was happening in the story. "AHH! This isn't possible!"
"Exactly!" Telsa cried,"And that is what I am going to write between you and Szayel if you don't get that suitcase!"
"AHHH! Anything!" Aaroniero shoved the tablet at Telsa, his mind burned with horrible images. "My eyes! ARRGG! My mind!"
"Then go get that damn suitcase!" Telsa screamed at him, pointing towards the automatic doors leading outside. "Now! Or I'm going to add in Rudbornn!"
"NOOO!"
Telsa watched Aaroniero run outside in five second flat.
He smiled.
Mission accomplished.
Author's Note: Telsa is amazing. Szayel and Nnoitra fell from a plane! No wonder they are totaled!
And I have a treat for all of my readers! I am going to be posting a chapter a day once again until the end of November. And I also have a soundtrack created for this story that I hope you all will enjoy.