The alarm rang shrilly and Gwen blindly reached out a hand to silence it. Fifteen more minutes, she told herself as she buried her face further into her pillow. It was Saturday after all. She should be able to sleep in, especially when her sleep in recent nights had been filled with dreams of Arthur. And not of the innocent kind. She really shouldn't have kissed him in the restaurant. It was a spur of the moment decision and now it haunted her – the feel of his lips, the taste of him.

The alarm rang again, less than five minutes later she thought and she struggled up to turn off the alarm. Something fell to the floor.

After a moment of searching, she found it. A gold coin. From Camelot.

It wasn't a bad dream at all.

"We had plans to visit Winter Wonderland at Hyde Park next weekend," said Dan, his mouth stuffed with the chicken pie she'd made for dinner.

"We did!" Jason piped up. "You promised!"

"I know but something came up –"

"In Southend-on-Sea?"

"You know how it is with new artists." She hoped her smile looked genuine. "Some of them need a personal touch."

Dan wasn't convinced, she could see it in his eyes but he just shrugged. "Alright then. We can make it a weekend getaway." He ruffled Jason's hair. "I'm sure Jason would love to go to the beach. Won't you, Jason?"

It had been on the tip of her tongue to say no, that she would be so busy with work that Dan and Jason would be bored, but the enthusiasm in Jason's eyes and the fact that he was practically bouncing in his chair made the words die on her lips. Surely she could work something out in Southend-on-Sea.

After they both put Jason to bed, she settled on the sofa with Dan, smiling as he pulled her legs onto his lap. "Uh, this feels so good," she moaned as his hands massaged her feet.

"So tell me about this artist who lives in Southend-on-Sea,"

"Umm, his name is Merlin –"

"Like the wizard?" laughed Dan, his hand squeezing her calves. "He must hate his parents."

Gwen laughed along. "Like the wizard. He's a bit of a recluse and second guessing his decision to show his work at our gallery."

"And he's that good that you have to go down and hold his hand?"

"Yup."

They sat cuddled on the sofa for another hour or two. Dan's attention was focused on the movie playing on the television, giving Gwen the chance to study him. A contract lawyer, Dan had been working with the gallery she worked at when they met. It hadn't been love at first sight, not for her at least but Dan somehow wormed his way into her heart. Most importantly, he'd wormed his way into Jason's heart. She loved Dan. She did. So why was it when she looked at him, she felt mostly guilt?

"You want me to pretend to be a recluse artist?" Merlin asked disbelievingly when she called him later in the night.

"You could magic up some art right? Just for when Dan and Jason are around."

She heard Merlin sigh over the line. "If you're going to bring them, maybe you should tell Dan the truth."

"And he's going to believe me? I can barely believe it myself!" She felt her heart start to race and an ache develop behind her eyes. Rubbing her forehead, she continued. "Maybe there's no need for us to go to Southend. Maybe if we just went on with life as usual, things will settle down."

When Merlin said nothing immediately, Gwen wondered if she'd upset him.

"Has it settled down for you?" He finally said. "Or have you been having that feeling that something isn't quite right, that something is missing?"

Merlin was right. If the way she had been feeling the past two weeks were any indication, not getting to the bottom of this, not figuring out a way to either live with the memories or purge herself of them would make for a very difficult life. She sighed into the phone.

"We'll work something out," said Merlin.

"Will we?" Gwen asked. "Because nothing has been alright since I remembered."

A pause. "If by alright, you mean the same as it was, then no."

"What if we pretended we don't remember – hang on – " Gwen looked down at Jason who had left his bedroom and was standing in front of her rubbing his eyes, eyes that were clearly bright with tears. "Sweetie, you should be in bed."

"Who are you talking to?"

"A friend." Quickly, she told Merlin she'd call him back then she squatted down. "You can't sleep?"

Jason shook his head, a slight pout on his face. "Bad dream."

The moment she opened her arms, Jason stumbled into them, his arms wound tightly around her neck. "It's just a dream, sweetie. It's not real."

"She said she would kill him," murmured Jason into her neck. "And she said I would help her. I don't want to kill anyone, mum."

Gwen's heart pounded at her son's words. His bad dreams usually involved some monster chasing him down dark alleys. Never this and she couldn't shake the feeling that it had something to do with the mess her life was in now. She tightened her arms around him, feeling his burrow further into her embrace. "Who is she?"

"I don't know. She was really white and she had long black hair. She said I would kill the King! I don't want to kill the King!" His wide eyes full of fear pierced Gwen.

"Remember what I said about bad dreams?"

Jason nodded reluctantly. "There are not real and I can control them."

With a smile, Gwen pinched his chin. "Exactly. They are just your imagination playing around. Sometimes they are just being naughty. Now, you're a good boy right?"

"Yes."

"Well then, good boys don't kill kings right?"

"Yes," Jason said, the tight hold he had on her top loosening.

"What do you do when the monsters chase you?"

"I stop running and tell them to stop."

"And when this lady comes again, you will tell her that she is wrong and that you are a good boy."

Jason nodded again, his lips pursed and a frown marring his forehead, which Gwen gently smoothened. "And good boys don't kill kings."

"And good boys don't kill kings," said Gwen as reassuringly as she could. "Come, let's go back to bed."

It was a good half an hour later before Jason finally fell asleep. Gwen sat on the side of his bed, watching his chest rise and fall. It hadn't been easy raising Jason all on her own, not when he tended to be sickly, having been a premature baby. But, he was her whole world and if she had to confront this past life of hers to keep him safe, she would.

Merlin yawned into the phone.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you."

"It's fine. Is your son alright?" Merlin still sounded half-asleep, causing Gwen to feel a little bad but she had to have answers.

"He had a dream. Of a white woman with long black hair wanting to kill the king."

Merlin's silence was not encouraging.

"It's Morgan le Fay isn't it?" Gwen finally broke the silence. "And the king is Arthur. I know enough of the Arthurian legends to know this." Her fingers gripped the cord of the phone tightly. "Why is Jason being dragged into this?"

"Morgana," Merlin said quietly. "She's Morgana, Arthur's half-sister. At least in times past. I don't think pretending we don't remember is going to work. Something is happening."

Gwen swallowed as her stomach lurched at Merlin's words. "What do we do now?"

"We go to Southend this weekend."

The phone cord had somehow wrapped itself around her hand and she tugged at it. "Ok."

"Arthur will drive us."

"I think it's better if we meet you there." There was no way she would be able to explain all this to Dan, much less explain why the city's most eligible bachelor would suddenly be driving her to Southend-on-Sea for the weekend. "And you'll pretend to be an artist right?"

Jason was practically floating on cloud nine from the moment he woke up. He asked, incessantly, about when they would be leaving for the beach and ran around the house with his small plastic pail and spade. As he made his hundredth round around the kitchen, Gwen grabbed him, lifted him up with some difficulty and plopped him onto a wooden chair.

"We're not going anywhere until you eat your breakfast."

He hit the table with his spade, laughing.

"Jason!"

Immediately, he dropped the spade and stared up at Gwen. Shaking her head at him, she placed the plate of food in front of him and he ate it all up, even the wholegrain bread he usually tried to avoid.

"Can we go now?" Despite the stress of the day, Jason's bright grin and sparkling eyes lightened her heart. The bad dreams were still haunting him so it was a relief to see him all chirpy and excited. Perhaps this trip to Southend would not only clear up all the questions she had about her past life, but also give Jason some happy memories.

"We have to wait for Dan to arrive. Why don't you put on your shoes?" Gwen glanced at the clock. Dan was late – not that it was surprising. "Let me check where he is."

With a firm nod, Jason scampered off.

A quick phone call to Dan led to one of his usual excuses for being late. The stress that Jason's pure joy had made her forget earlier quickly rose in her again. She didn't want to miss their train to Southend but Dan was really cutting it close.

As she double checked that her windows were locked, her phone rang.

"Hello? Dan?"

"That's your partner?" Arthur voice poured through her phone, his smooth tone like a caress.

"Arthur," she said, far too shocked to say anything else. Since that day at Merlin's café, she hadn't had direct contact with him.

"Guinevere."

"Gwen," she replied firmly.

There was a short pause before he spoke again, casually ignoring her correction of her name. "Are you sure you won't take a lift from me?"

"Yes. I'm sure."

"You could always say I'm a potential buyer. The Knight Industries often buy art. Maybe I'm really keen to meet this reclusive artist."

She was tempted, so tempted. His car was bound to be large and comfortable, and there was no need for changing trains, rushing off and on platforms.

He must have read her mind. "Come on. It's far more comfortable and convenient than the train."

With Dan still not at her house and the clock ticking, Gwen knew they would have to rush to make the train. She glanced at Jason who was sitting at the door, legs swinging as he waved the spade around. "Alright."

Jason was snuggled on her lap, telling her about all the things he was planning to do at the beach, when Arthur's sleek car pulled up outside her house. Just then, she saw Dan round the corner and her heart sank. From her window, she watched as Arthur unfolded himself out of the car and tugged at his coat. Then Dan walked by. Heart in her throat, she watched as the two men spoke for a while, shook hands then turned to walk up the path to the door. Although they were about the same height, Dan was slightly rounder, the beard on his face a contrast to Arthur's clean shaven jaw. A slight twinge of guilt tugged at her heart as she found her eyes drawn more to Arthur and his confident stride. Behind his shades, Gwen swore that he was staring at her.

The doorbell rang.

"Gwen," Dan leaned over and kissed her, a brush against her lips. "Look who I found outside."

Arthur nodded. "Ms Thomas." He lowered his eyes, clearly catching sight of Jason who was hiding behind her legs. Squatting down and sliding off his shades, he smiled warmly. "And hello there, who are you?"

His arms still clutching her legs, Jason whispered his name.

"Jason. I'm Arthur." He ruffled Jason's hair then stood. "Your son?"

Gwen nodded. "And you've met Dan already, of course," said Gwen, her nerves buzzing.

"Yes I did. I was telling him how fortunate I was to have met you."

Dan's arm slipped around her shoulder. "Mr Knight was -"

"Call me Arthur."

"Arthur was telling me about how you've been intervening between him and this Merlin artist." His arm tightened around her.

Gwen nodded again, unsure of what to say.

Flashing a wide grin, Arthur said, "she's been very good at her job. Good enough that I'm personally driving her to pick him up."

"He's not from Southend?"

"He is," said Gwen quickly. "He's just in town for some personal business."

"Ah," Dan said, a confused frown still marred his face. "Well, I guess it's a good thing Mr - Arthur is here since I'm late. Sorry about that." He looked at Arthur. "Perils of being a lawyer. Everyone wants your time."

Gwen could tell that Arthur's interest was faked, but he smiled and enquired politely about Dan's job, yet somehow, he managed to make Gwen feel like his gaze was burning into her. The whole situation was getting too strange for Gwen to bear so she bent over and scooped Jason up. He buried his face into her neck, clearly as uncomfortable as her.

"We should get going," Gwen said. "Don't want Merlin to wait too long. You know how he is."

"Right," said Arthur. Before she could protest, he grabbed her duffle bag and walked towards the car. Dan cast a suspicious glance at her, then gestured for her to walk ahead with Jason.

"I thought Merlin was a recluse artist," whispered Dan. "If he's letting Arthur drive him around, he doesn't seem to reclusive to me."

"Being a recluse, doesn't mean not taking advantage of luxuries that come your way," said Gwen, even as she realised how weak her argument was. She should really have made up some reason why Dan couldn't come. Hurting his feelings then would have been preferable to the hole she seemed to have dug for herself. "And riding in Arthur's car would be faster and more comfortable than the train. Speaking of which, can we get a refund on the tickets?"

At least he had the decency to look contrite. "I doubt it. Look, I'm sorry I was late but –"

"Another client needed your time at the last minute?" Gwen sighed. "Dan, it's been happening far too often, this being late. You were late for Jason's birthday party two weeks ago."

They reached Arthur's car and Dan's reply died on his lips. Their bags were tossed into the boot and Gwen and Jason slid into the back seats. Dan took the front, next to Arthur.

"There's a mini-fridge with drinks. I got some soda for Jason, if he's allowed to drink that of course," Arthur said, as he started the engine.

His words got Jason to life his head and look at Gwen. "Soda?"

Smiling, Gwen settled Jason on the seat next to her and belted him up. "Only one can, ok? Then it's water."

"Ok!" His voice dropped to a whisper. "This is a big car."

Gwen nodded. "It is."

With a purr, the engine started up and they were off, hurtling towards a future Gwen had no idea what was in store. She held Jason tightly to her. He was the most important thing in her life and she would do anything to protect him, even if it meant plunging into this strange world of reincarnated lives.

Years of finishing school meant that it didn't take much effort to make small talk with Dan. His attention though was keenly focused on the passengers in his back seat. He hadn't interacted with Jason much but that brief moment, when Jason's eyes met his, he'd felt a pull, a draw towards the young boy. As far as Arthur remembered, he and Guinevere never had any children, so Jason couldn't be a reincarnation of their child.

It was almost funny – he, Arthur Knight, had eschewed settling down for so long, so much so that his father was practically throwing suitable partners at him, and now all he wanted to do was be a family with Guinevere and Jason. Except, it wasn't quite so easy. There was Dan and there was the fact that Guinevere didn't seem to quite remember him or the love they shared. And most worryingly, there was Morgana, coming to Jason in dreams.

"What exactly do you do Arthur?" Dan asked, a challenge in his voice. Arthur was well aware of his reputation in the gossip rags.

"This and that," he said. "I'm sure you know what Knight Holdings does. I'm in charge of most of the business nowadays since my father is semi-retired. Not retired enough to keep his nose out of my business though."

"Hmm," said Dan. "And how are you involved with Gwen's gallery and this reclusive artist?"

Arthur shifted in his seat. "Well, I wanted to get something for my bedroom and Merlin's art caught my eye. But he's not easy to deal with and Gwen has been negotiating between us."

"Funny how Gwen never mentioned working with you before," said Dan.

"Ah, that's my doing. You know how much the press loves to follow me around. I swore her to secrecy."

Dan hummed again. "It's funny, isn't it? That your name is Arthur, the artist's name is Merlin and Gwen, well is sometimes short for Guinevere."

Behind him, Arthur heard Gwen's forced laughter and he smiled tightly. "I guess if someone called Morgan turns up, that would be icing on the cake. You should buy the lottery."

Dan laughed again and Arthur quickly changed the subject, asking Gwen about Jason, a topic, he realised, she loved talking about. And he also realised, he loved listening to her voice. Only, every time Dan contributed something to the conversation – a shared memory of Jason – Arthur could feel the resentment burning his gut.

It didn't take long before they pulled up in front of Merlin's tiny place. Merlin stood in front of his door, oversized sunnies on his face, a paint splattered shirt hanging off his skinny frame, a large floppy hat on his head and a brightly coloured carpet bag in his hand.

Arthur groaned inwardly. Clearly this is what Merlin thought artists looked like.

"I hope he hasn't been waiting long," said Gwen as she practically rushed out of the car. "Merlin! Let me take your bags."

"He's an odd sort," said Dan and Arthur nodded, smiling.

"He is."

"I'll sit in the back with Gwen."

Merlin entered the car, grinned at Arthur who sighed, started the car and drove off. It was a two hour drive to Southend. Hopefully, they would survive it.