A/N: And so it begins...

Chapter 1

Shepard was furious, seething and even now, pushing herself to her limits in the Alliance gym, her anger wasn't going anywhere. She danced back from the punch bag with a roar of frustration. Sweat dripping from her brow as she flicked her hair from her eyes. Darting back in on the backswing she delivered another punishing blow to the bag. She felt like a caged animal stuck on earth, she didn't belong here, not now, not when the Reapers could attack at any moment. She needed to be out there. Doing something. Anything-so long as it was useful.

Swing.

It's a waste of time. Stupid. Pointless. Nobody was even paying attention to anything she was telling them. The anger spiked again, fuelling her workout, forcing her to channel her energy into the bag.

Jab. Duck

She was a soldier. A goddamn Icon if you wanted to go that route; Saviour of the Citadel, Hero of Elysium and now she was a prisoner on her own planet. Hell, she wasn't even a soldier anymore. They'd taken her crew, her ship, even her fucking rank. All she was useful for now was as a poster child, the first human Spectre, smoothing relations between the Alliance and the rest of the galactic community. Proving humanity was worth the new seat on the council and that meant dealing with that jumped up asshole Udina.

Swing. Duck. Spin. Kick.

She'd spent the whole day dealing with him. Listening to his bureaucratic bullshit as she was forced to smile for the media vultures.

Jab. Uppercut.

Hearing him waxing on about his plans for improving the galaxy. Listening to him buttering up his fellow councillors. Listening to them arguing over which venue would be best for the semi-annual council ball, the colour schemes and seating plans. It was all useless. She'd have thought showing them the remains of the destroyed Collector base and the human Reaper would have been enough to get their attention but no!

Jab. Swing. Duck. Lunge. Spin. Punch. Duck.

She was angry. So unbelievably angry at everyone's ability to ignore the truth, even when...No. Especially when faced with irrefutable evidence.

Her hands were burning now with the force she was using when punching the bag. Her were muscles aching with the exertion. Still, the pain felt good, a vent for all the tightly wound frustration.

She was a Spectre in name but she had no powers. Not here. Not on Earth where she was expected to smile and salute and bow to the whims of the Alliance brass like a good little soldier. She was a token of good faith, a political weapon to be used to bully and intimidate one moment and then sweet talk and persuade the next. The only one giving humanity any real standing with the rest of the galaxy.

Anger flared up inside one more as she lunged again, striking the bag with a biotically enhanced fist and a primal roar-sending it flying from the hook and across the room. She had been stuck on Earth making amends for her past mistakes for months now. She was so fucking sick of it, she'd handed herself in four months ago, handing over the new Normandy and bidding goodbye to her friends and crew believing she was doing the right thing. Sacrificing herself for the good of the Alliance, for humanity as a whole. But now she was crawling the walls. Nothing was being done, the Council was still ignoring the threat of the Reapers and there was nothing she could do about it; instead she was subjected to incarceration, being used to make nice with all the politicians the Alliance could throw at her, making her look repentant as she was used as humanities scapegoat.

Releasing another roar of frustration, she spun around; driving a fist into the wall of the gym. "This is bullshit!" she stopped, panting from exhaustion and the adrenaline surging through her body as her voice echoed around the room.

"Damn , Lola! Repairs cost credits!"

She turned around panting as her chest heaved from the effort she had been using.

"Vega." She nodded curtly at the marine before moving across to a treadmill standing in the corner of the room. She set a punishing pace. Forcing her muscles to push through the strain she was feeling.

"You wanna talk about it?" Shepard ignored the man, focusing on the burning in her legs. "Okay, Lola. Well, since I didn't just come down here to check you out..." She shot him a dirty look over her shoulder not breaking her pace. Ignoring her mood he shot a flirtatious wink and a cocky grin in her direction. "I should really tell you what I did come down here for. The Admiralty want you in their next meeting. They're starting in 20 minutes. I don't really know much but from what I can tell there's been some weird shit going down somewhere and they want you to fix it."

Shepard snorted humourlessly, flicking off the treadmill and finally turned to look the marine in the eye.

"Sounds about right. That's about the only time they do want me." She grimaced and let out a huff of breath; running a hand through matted hair.

"Alright. Lemme jump in the shower and I'll be right out."

He winked, "I'll be riiight here" she snorted again a bit happier this time.

"Yeah, yeah Vega. I'm starting to doubt your ever gonna make good on all this flirting. Anyway, you're not my type." She laughed at the mock offended expression on his face

Ten minutes later she was washed, dressed and being ushered in to the Alliance HQ boardroom. Glancing around quickly she counted five admirals and no one else but her and Vega. She came to a stop in the center of the room and snapped to attention, vaguely taking note as Vega did the same before he slid out of sight.

"At ease Shepard." She shifted in her stance, lowering her arms into a parade rest, wondering silently what the hell this was all about. She hadn't pissed any one off recently. She wracked her brain-at least she didn't think she had..?

The same strong, commanding voice rang out again. "You're no doubt wondering why you've been summoned." She cleared her throat.

"Yes Sir, I was wondering." The admiral who spoke before (Admiral Johnson?) smiled at her slightly awkward response.

"Relax Shepard. This is simply a briefing. We have decided to reinstate your previous rank of Commander." She felt her heart leap at his words. "We have also decided to reinstate you to your previous post as Commander of the Cerberus frigate the SR-2 Normandy" Shepard looked confused. "But Sir, the Normandy…" She trailed off as she caught Admiral Anderson's eye. He shook his head slightly and threw a knowing smile her way. She bit back the rest of her question. Anderson hadn't steered her wrong yet.

"Never mind sir, you were saying?"

"Yes. We have decided to reinstate you as Commander of the Normandy and you will be dispatched on a mission tomorrow with a full crew compliment. The matter of this mission is…" He paused for a moment, searching for the right word. "…delicate, to say the least." Admiral Johnson raised his omnitool. "I have forwarded you all the necessary data for this mission, including a crew roster and departure information." Shepard nodded as her own wrist display flashed orange. "No doubt you still have questions. These are questions we cannot answer. Report to your ship and travel to the Citadel. I assure you, the answers you want are there. Dismissed Commander."

Shepard stood still for a moment, utterly confused as to what was happening. But at the final word she snapped into a salute almost on autopilot, spun on her heels and marched out of the door she had entered through.

The hell was that? They didn't tell me anything and after weeks of being stuck here on Earth, they just decided they need me again? Ah well. She smirked to herself. At least I'm getting out of here and away from that prick Udina and the maddening urge to beat his scrawny ass from here to Omega.

She grinned outright at that idea. Although she figured that might actually be the final straw that got her kicked out of the Alliance permanently.

"Commander Shepard!" She turned to see Anderson striding towards her.

"Admiral Anderson, Sir!" She snapped into a salute as befitted his superior rank.

He frowned.

"What are you doing Shepard? Just because you got yourself reinstated does not mean that you have permission to go all formal on me." He smiled at her sheepish expression as she lowered her arm.

"Sorry Sir. Old habits are hard to break."

"Yes, well, that's one you're going to have to work on." He quirked an eyebrow at her making her laugh.

"Yes sir!"

He started walking, gesturing for her to fall into step beside him.

"Sorry about all the secrecy kid. Galactic bureaucratic bullshit and red tape. It's a goddamn menace." She smiled waiting for him to continue. "Bottom line is we've got problems along the council borders of the Terminus. Technically, the colonies that have been attacked are on our side of the border but its close enough to the Terminus for it to be a problem for any Alliance crew to investigate." Shepard's eyebrows knit together in confusion. "Sir, I'm still not exactly sure what's happened. You said that colonies were attacked. How? And when?" Anderson chuckled.

"I forgot you haven't had chance to read through the mission brief yet. Come on."
With that he grasped her arm and tugged her through the door into the hangar where a shuttle was hovering at rest. Climbing into the back Anderson slipped into the pilot's chair and started it up. Glancing back he let out a burst of sudden laughter making Shepard grin.

She'd always loved Anderson.

"What is it Sir?"

"I was just about to suggest you fly us out but then I remembered your track record." Shepard rolled her eyes. She was used to the jokes by now. It wasn't her fault that every time she'd piloted a shuttle they were either getting shot at or they were chasing someone. Anyway, she was good enough to pass basic training and she was theoretically able to pilot the Normandy. She'd never actually tried it but she hadn't liked the idea of being in command of a ship she didn't know how to fly. An old superstition drilled into her by Anderson himself when she had been his XO.

"Where exactly are we going Sir?"

"At this second, there are teams finishing retrofitting the Normandy to meet Alliance regulations on their frigates. The upgrades you acquired are brilliant and our scientists have studied the design hoping to incorporate some of them into standard military tech. You're getting your ship back Shepard. You're being released from Alliance custody so that you can fulfill your duties as a Council Spectre. This mission does not exist. Officially, this is a Council mission investigating the attacks on these colonies."

"Sir! I still don't know what colonies you're talking about!" She was exasperated. She was sick of the riddles and she wanted a straight answer.

Anderson drew in a deep breath.

"For the last several weeks we've had scattered, and as yet, unconfirmed reports of attacks on human colonies on the borders of the Terminus. We haven't been able to investigate due to tensions along the borders but yesterday at 0400 hours a distress beacon was activated on the Xara Shui colony. It had one small settlement, mostly farmers, and a small token squad of Alliance soldiers under the command of one: Lieutenant-Commander Alexander Kirshaw. This beacon is the only communication we've detected in that area and we haven't been able to establish contact since. You're being commissioned in your capacity as a Spectre, to investigate what happened and to find out who's behind these attacks."

Shepard was gob-smacked. She'd only just got through investigating colonies and she had walked through hell and back to do it. And now after punishing her for it, they were ordering her back out into the Terminus to do just that?! What the actual fuck?

"With all due respect, Sir…What the hell?!" Anderson snorted. "I only just did that and the Alliance are only deciding to do something about this now? If I may, can I ask how we know that the same people are responsible for the attacks if no one has investigated yet?"

"We haven't known that much about it Commander" He stressed her title, a small reproach for her outburst. "We, received our information from a, err…rather unusual source that we wouldn't have thought to contact ourselves." Shepard's brow wrinkled again. "We received a fairly detailed report from the Shadow Broker just after we detected the distress beacon." Shepard's heart leapt at the name. The Shadow Broker meant Liara. Liara had sent them the tip off. That meant it was legitimate. She fought the smile trying to force itself on to her face as she remembered their last night together.

"Shepard," A breathless whisper escaped the asari as she trailed her lips down the gorgeous blue expanse of her neck and the gentle swell of her breasts.

Shepard smiled to herself, blowing a short breath of air across heated blue skin before she moved to take a hardened peak in her mouth, suckling gently, causing the asari to whimper again, stroking her arms up her lovers back to tangle in her mussed red locks. Shepard pulled back offering a teasing nip to the sensitive tip causing Liara to gasp and arch her back into the touch. Shepard retraced her steps back up to capture her asari's lips in a soft kiss, slowly increasing the depth and stoking the blossoming heat between them into a haze of passion and love. Hands gliding over well learned muscles and expanses of skin; tracing scars and tiny, almost imperceptible blemishes. Teasing. Stroking. Loving.

Shepard loved it when they were together like this. Yes, she loved the times when they wanted each other so badly neither had the patience for gentleness but times like this were her favorite. She loved the tenderness. The love. The time she could take to show the one who had captured her heart, mind and soul just how much she felt for her.

They had known that night would be their last for who knew how long. Shepard was returning to Earth and Liara had a job to do. Responsibility and duty tearing them away from each other once more. That night had been a way for them to reaffirm their love. To commit each expanse of sensitive skin to memory again. A way to remember just how much they loved each other and how nothing could keep them apart forever. There would be time later for lust and the blazing inferno of need and desire demanding to be sated. But for now…they would take their time.

They caressed each other. Teasing strokes and nips and kisses to sensitive places long ago memorised. Exploration of well-mapped bodies-learned and then relearned. When they had finally melded they were surrounded, completely immersed in their love for each other, the life they wanted to have and the daughters with shocking green eyes and striking blue skin they both longed for. They had peaked together, the same as they usually did, the waves cresting and waning in sync with the other. The whispered endearments and the overriding 'I love you' echoing around them, reverberating in their hearts and joined minds.

"Shepard?" She blinked, slightly upset to be dragged away from her memories. "I think I lost you there for a second?"

"Yes Sir. Sorry. I was just...reminded, of someone when you mentioned the Shadow Broker."

"Yes well, there are correlations between the attacks, a pattern we hadn't noticed. If it wasn't for him pointing it out, you would never have been allowed your commission back."

Shepard nodded her understanding. She glanced out the window and could suppress the smile that sprang forward at the sight of the Normandy. Her hull plating repaired, her paint shiny. She looked as good as new for the third time it seemed and a damn sight better than she had looked when Shepard had turned her over.

I'm almost home

"I suggest you read through those files on your omnitool. Get settled into your cabin and I'll contact you in the morning. Make sure you get some rest Shepard. You're going to need it."

At that the shuttle bay doors opened and Anderson slipped the shuttle inside, setting it down and powering off the engine. He spun in his seat to face the Commander. "I'm not going to lie to you, the last thing I want is for you to go out there unprepared. This isn't an Alliance mission, this is a Spectre mission and as such, if things go to hell you're on your own. We've given you back the Normandy fixed up to Alliance specs but officially it's still a recovered Cerberus ship. It hasn't been registered yet and therefore the Alliance have full deniability should anything happen or you manage to piss off anyone else."

Shepard opened her mouth to protest but was cut off when he raised an eyebrow at her.

"There's no point in arguing kid. I know you too well. People may not like your methods all the time but people follow you because you tell it like it is and you can't deny; you get some pretty damn impressive results. The point is-this time it's just you. You've got a basic crew and are fully prepped for takeoff whenever you're ready. You have total control over what happens from here on out. I would recommend you call in some friends though. From the reports that I've seen your enemy isn't messing around. These attacks aren't random and I don't mind saying, I'd feel a heck of a lot better if you made sure you have someone you can trust to have your back. Udina picked a lot of your crew personally and you know that bastard hates you."

Shepard grinned a bit at that.

"I assure you Sir, the feeling is entirely mutual." Anderson let out a dry chuckle. "I'd noticed. Still, get people you trust Shepard. Get to know your crew and get that…'VI'… of yours," He gave her a knowing look. "To check out the crews backgrounds."

"Sir, why do I get the feeling there's something you're not telling me? What's happened?"

Anderson let out a long breath of air, his eyes searching hers. "Shepard..."

He paused, scrubbing a hand across his face.

"You know I've always thought of you as the daughter I've never had. I just want to make sure you're safe. Udina was dead set against this mission. Protesting at every turn, accusing you of all sorts you wouldn't believe."

Shepard laughed,

"I probably would Sir." Anderson waved a hand to silence her again

"Then he disappeared off base and reappeared an hour later having had a sudden change of heart but insisting on having input in the mission. He helped to choose the crew. Something is amiss. I can feel it in my gut. That man is no better than a sniveling gutter rat but he's damn smart and that's a problem for everyone."

Shepard nodded her head in understanding.

"I'll be fine, Sir. I was taught by the best."

She shot a cocky grin at Anderson causing a smile to crack through his grim expression. He leaned forward and cuffed her on the arm.

"You better believe it kid. Now go on. Get out of here and show them what you're made of. I'd check out the Xara Shui colony. Never know. There might be something there worth the trip."

With one last smile she jumped from the shuttle onto the deck and moved up to the console opening the Normandy docking bay again allowing Anderson to slip back out into space. As the shutter slid shut again with a hiss Shepard sighed. She still wasn't too clear on what was happening but it was clear it was serious.

And here I am, by myself with apparently no-one I can trust around me. Fucking fantastic.

She steeled herself. She had a job to do and if the reports were right people were losing their lives.

If the reports are right? She snorted to herself. Of course they're right. Liara wouldn't send me on a wild goose chase.

A pang of longing shot through her at the thought of Liara. It had been so long since she had seen her. So long since she'd seen any of her old friends actually.

Activating the lift, she sighed again and ran a hand through her hair; sending it back into its usual unruly state. Time to get this show on the road.

A few moments later she emerged onto the CIC.

Galaxy map. Check. Armory? Nope.

She wrinkled her brow in confusion and glanced to her right.

Research lab? Nope. Okay, I need to get an updated map before I embarrass myself and end up walking somewhere I shouldn't.

Clearing her throat she stepped onto the deck with confident strides. Even though she didn't know which of these people she could trust, she'd be dammed before she'd let them know the idea made her uncomfortable.
"Pilot, plot a course for the Citadel. I need to see the council."

More like I want to get my weapons and armor. She grinned internally. Just one of the perks of being a spectre.

"Pilot?" an indignant voice rang out down the corridor. "I'd have thought you'd have damn well learnt my name at least by now Commander."

"Joker?!" Shepard was incredulous. "What the hell are you doing here?"

She walked the length of the deck to the cockpit, and tried and failed to suppress her genuine smile as she caught sight of the familiar baseball cap.

"Well, you see, the Normandy is my ship and as the only pilot qualified to fly with this particular 'VI'." He spread his arms as EDI's visual interface popped up. "Greetings Shepard. Jeff convinced the Alliance Admiralty he was the ideal candidate and with his experience flying the Normandy, his presence made sense."

Joker grinned up at her. "That and the fact that you'll need someone to haul your ass back out of which ever hell you're planning on walking into. I might even manage to keep the ship in one piece this time."

Shepard let out a short laugh at that. He always knew how to make her smile. He was like the annoying younger brother that drives you up the wall but you can never bring yourself to tell off.

"We'll see Joker" She paused as a tide of relief washed through her knowing she had a least one person she could trust without question. "It's good to have you back."

He smiled and nodded in agreement. For a second she couldn't help but suspect Anderson had vouched for him.

"You too Shep." The pilot turned around again.

"Now get us to the Citadel Joker. We've got a job to do."

With one last smile, she shook her head and walked back to the lift. She needed to get up to her cabin so she could read through those files.

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