I take it you guys didn't like Double Zero, so I thought I'd back track a little and go ahead and do a Christmas scene.
Lucy looked up at the Christmas tree that was standing tall in their living room. There were beautiful cream colored bulbs hanging from the limbs along with tons of other orenments Lucy helped pick out and hang. The lights were a pattern of red, yellow, green, and blue that flickered in a sort of patter. There were red beads and silver garland it as well. It was the first Christmas tree she had ever had in her home and she loved it more than she could openly express. It smelled so good, a scent she never wanted to forget. That's why she had spend every night since they had put it up in the living room, admiring it before it they had to take it down.
Normally Gillian didn't wait until the week before Christmas to decorate the tree, but this had been a particularly crazy year. Lucy didn't seem to mind though, she was just happy to get to do it. She had been watching Christmas movies and asking a million questions about Santa. Gillian could see that Lucy wasn't completely sure about such a man, especially since he somehow missed her in the past, but she tried to be open minded.
The little girl laid on her back with her head just under the limbs of the Christmas tree, staring up through the branches at the lights on them.
Gillian smiled as she entered the room. She had gotten up to check on Lucy to once again find her bed empty and knew exactly where to find her. Lucy's brown curls were sprawled on the floor while mismatched socked feet moved back and forth to a tune she had been humming all day.
Last Christmas she could have never expected her life to look like this. Never in her wildest dreams would she be able to think that the first Christmas after her marriage had crumbled she would believe she could possibly be has happy as she was right then.
Lucy heard Gillian enter the room, but kept staring up at the lights.
"Mommy, how come Santa never came to me before?" Lucy asked again as she turned her head to look up at Gillian through the branches.
Gillian sat the boxes down and rubbed the little girl's socked feet. "Lucy, we've talked about this."
The girl crossed her arms and fiddled with one of the lights on the tree. Her eyes were distant as she turned away from her mother and curled her legs into her stomach. She hadn't even heard of Santa until school. No one believed her when she said she didn't know who he was, then everyone laughed. She was tired of people laughing and teasing her.
Lucy bit her lip and closed her eyes. "I don't want him to miss me again though. I try to be good. You said he only brings presents to good-"
Gillian's heart broke as silent tears ran down the little girl's face. "Sweetheart, you're-"
"Mommy, I don't wanna be bad, I try to be good," Lucy promised not looking at Gillian.
Slowly, Gillian moved closer to her little girl and slowly pulled her out from under the tree.
It was hard to imagine what Lucy was feeling. For a moment Gillian wished she was in the mind of her little darling. Child abuse was something she had so much difficulty understanding. For so long, all Gillian wanted was a baby. Someone that she could love and hold, kiss goodnight and read stories to. That's what Gillian wanted most in life.
It was so difficult for her to understand making a child, a small human being that is the most innocent thing in the world, fear everything around it. To physically beat a child and make it feel like it was nothing, it seemed impossible to imagine.
But now it was her daughter. Someone had hurt her baby girl and more than anything she just wanted to go back in time and save Lucy before all the hurt could begin. That's what she wanted. What she wouldn't give to save Lucy from all the pain she had already gone through.
Gillian held Lucy in her lap, cradling her close and kissing her hair as she closed her eyes. "I love you more than you'll ever know," Gillian whispered against a mess of curls. "And Santa has a load of presents that he will deliver for you tonight, I promise."
Lucy rested her head on Gillian's chest and furrowed her brow. "I'm sorry I make you sad."
The apology broke her heart, but how did someone explain something like that to a child? "Lucy, no. You make me so happy, really happy," Gillian assured her. For a few moments longer, she held Lucy tight on the floor of her living room before setting her up on her feet and giving her a watery smile.
Lucy's big blue eyes looked back at Gillian as Gillian's hand cupper her face. She was nearly six years old and somehow could see a whole different world. Yet the world she was being offered, the world Gillian was trying to give her, was so utterly foreign that it made her nervous. It seemed too good to be true to. For a little girl to think anything was too good to be true was just sad.
Gillian rubbed her nose against Lucy's and tried to give her the most genuine smile she could muster up. "I love you so much."
Lucy snuggled into Gillian and closed her eyes, a small crease in her forehead never relaxing. "I love you too, Mommy."
Those words should never sound sad.
Especially not on Christmas Eve.
She looked at the little girl who's head rested against her shoulder. "What do you say you open one present tonight?" she offered trying to brighten Lucy's eyes a little.
Lucy looked skeptically at Gillian. "But it's not even Christmas yet."
Gillian shrugged. "How about you open one present tonight and save the rest for tomorrow? It can be like a new tradition," she suggested. "One for you and me."
Lucy smiled. "Okay. Somethings just for you and me."
Getting to her feet, Gillian looked around at the wrapped presents on the floor. There were dozens of them. Some of them were more finely wrapped than others because Lucy wanted to help, but they were definitely wrapped with love. Finally, Gillian reached down to a smaller box and handed it to Lucy.
Lucy looked at it for a long time, before turning it over and undoing the tape at the bottom. Slowly she began to unwrap the paper, trying not to tear it. When the sound of the smallest rip caught both their attention and Lucy nervously looked up at Gillian.
"Rip it open," Gillian encouraged with a smile, pulling the little girl back into her lap and watching over her shoulder.
The sound of giggles and ripping wrapping paper changed the atmosphere in the room to a much more Christmassy one. When all the paper was torn away and discarded to the floor, Lucy got really quiet. "For me?" Lucy asked, holding a grey and black stuffed cat. She nuzzled her face into the fur and gave Gillian a big smile.
"That's just one of the presents, there are more tomorrow," Gillian replied.
Just then there was a knock on the door, followed by the sound of footsteps.
"I smell cookies," Cal called. In a heartbeat Lucy was off of Gillian's lap running toward the foyer.
Laughing, Gillian also got to her feet. "You're supposed to knock then wait for me to open the door," she told him as he came around the corner, holding Lucy in his arms. "Not knock and use your key."
Cal leaned in and kissed her lips. "Less work for you, love." Gillian smiled as she connected their lips again. She loved the way he was smiling and how he tasted like mint tea.
"Cal, look what Mommy let me open!" Lucy announced from between them, earning their attention.
The grey and white kitten was held up with pride as Lucy gave the man who she loved like a father examined it. "You got to open a present early? It's not even Christmas."
Lucy pulled the kitty into her and looked to her mother for help. The line on her forehead and her oblique eyebrows told her that she was nervous, afraid she broke a rule. It only hit Cal a moment later that he had done something wrong and immediately tried to fix it.
Gillian was already kneeling in front of the little girl. "It's okay, sweetheart. Cal's just playing."
Big blue eyes looked up at him as she moved into her mother. "Mommy said I could open one…"
Cal never let his regret show, even though Gillian knew that he felt guilty about upsetting the child. There was something about how Cal looked at Lucy that took away any worry Gillian could ever think of having about him not loving her. It was no different than the way he looked at Emily when she little. He didn't care that Lucy was not his child or even biologically Gillian's, she was one of the handful of people he held very closely to his heart, right by Gillian and Emily.
"Mummy here is bendin' the rule on Christmas," Cal pretended to surprised. "What a rule breaker."
Gillian leaned against him and Lucy hugged her new stuffed animal tight. "I gots to go to sleep so Santa will come, right Cal?"
Cal scooped up the girl again as she giggled joyously. "Yes! That means bedtime!"
Gillian watched as Cal tickled the girl and carried her up the steps to her bedroom.
"Wait, Cal!" Lucy demanded, wiggling free from his grip. "I got to tell Mommy goodnight!"
The little feet raced down the steps and sprung into her mother's arms. "Goodnight, Mommy," the little girl said softly holding tightly to Gillian's neck.
"Goodnight," Gillian replied setting the girl back on the floor. "Love you."
The little girl kissed her mother's cheek and smiled at her. "Love you too…" Then she hesitated. "Thank you for my kitty. I'm gunna call her Flowers."
Gillian almost laughed at the name, but before she could ask the reason behind it, Lucy wrapped her arms around Gillian's legs in another hug. "And thank you for being my mommy."
The girl released her hold and sprang back toward Cal with Flowers dangling from her hand. Gillian wished that she could have spent Lucy's first Christmas with her, and she had only realized she was.
She could hear Cal's animations of some story as Gillian poured herself a glass of wine and took a seat on the couch. For a moment she contemplated calling her mother, but didn't want her mood to be ruined by her mother's criticism of her life choices or of Lucy. Instead, she sat quietly in the living room, the only light being from the Christmas tree.
Cal smiled as he stopped on the steps and looked over at her. She had this sort of peaceful look on her face. Her brow wasn't furrowed with worry like it so often was, nor her lips pursed as they were when she was in deep thought about work. For once, she looked content.
Coming up behind her, he ran his strong hands down her back and sat down. She leaned against him, sighing deeply.
"Lucy made Santa cookies," she told him offhandedly. "Triple chocolate."
He chuckled. "Mrs. Claus's favorite."
Of course she smirked. "I may have given her the idea."
"And assisted her, I hope. The house is still standing."
"She's attentive for her age."
"And a prodigy baker," he added fishing a cookie off the plate nearby and taking a bite. "Emily's come over tomorrow morning with present for you and Lucy. From her specifically, I was forced to by yours myself."
Gillian smiled and leaned deeper into him. She inhaled and let him wrap his arms around her. "Merry Christmas, Cal."
He closed his eyes and held her tight. "Merry Christmas."
Now if you want the Double Zero chapter back, I'll repost it so let me know. I hope you enjoyed a little dash of Christmas in April! Please review.