Chapter 3

Sunlight streamed through the windows of Minerva's bedroom and she cursed the bright light for invading first her wonderful dream and then her consciousness. It was Saturday morning and while she wasn't accustomed to sleeping late, her head begged for a slight deviation from the normal routine this particular day. Minerva had never been exceptionally gifted at holding her alcohol as her friend Xiomara enjoyed pointing out, but something about last night made her drink more than her usual. Unfortunately, she was paying for it this morning with a hangover.

With her head pounding, Minerva began to replay the conversations from the previous night, especially the one involving her unusual behavior and the gossip running around the school. She happily remembered the sketch book and what it might mean but then her thoughts began to turn darker when she realized that eventually she was going to have to admit that she'd seen the book.

Fear gripped her heart like it never had before. What if she admitted that she'd seen his sketches and he grew angry with her? What if he lost all trust in her and it damaged their friendship? Or worse…what if he decided he couldn't be friends with someone who would intentionally pry into the personal effects of another person? Clutching her pillow to her chest, Minerva began to visualize different scenarios, some better than others. She was on the verge of tears when a knock on her door snapped her back to the present.

Moving faster than her body would have liked, Minerva jumped up and threw on a dressing gown before inquiring as to who was on the other side of the door. Hearing Poppy's soft voice, she opened the door and let her friend inside. "What brings you here this morning? I'd have thought you'd still be dealing with a hangover too."

"Xiomara wasn't filling my glass nearly as much as she was yours, dear. But I do have to commend you on being able to keep your secret, despite all the whisky she gave you last night." Poppy took a seat in the comfortable wingback chair and called for a house elf to bring some toast and tea for Minerva. Once the little creature was gone, she continued. "I think she believed if she could get you drunk enough, you'd tell us what was going through your mind all this week."

Minerva's eyes grew large. "And did I? I mean, did I say anything last night about what had happened this week?" She desperately hoped that her conscious and her willpower had been strong enough to avoid even the strongest of drinks and questions from her friends.

Poppy saw her opportunity to surreptitiously discover the nature of Minerva's distraction but she immediately decided that her friendship was more important than lying to obtain information. "No, you were very tight lipped about the whole thing, much to Xiomara's and Sprout's displeasure," she giggled softly.

"And you're sitting there telling me that you're not the least bit interested in any details?" Minerva quipped, knowing full well her friend wouldn't take offense to the question.

Poppy laughed and shrugged her shoulders. "I know if you want to talk about it, you will and if not, then there's no use in me trying to get it out of you. Obviously it's something important or you wouldn't have wasted an entire week of it and given your recent behavior, I'd say it has something to do with Professor Dumbledore."

Minerva's head turned sharply, causing her hand to fly to her temple and wince at the pain shooting through it. "What gives you that idea? Can't I have problems or worries without them involving Albus in any way?"

Shaking her head, Poppy smiled. "Minerva, I'm not here to harass you this morning, only to offer you this hangover potion. And to answer your question, if the root of your problem isn't Albus, you'd have been spending more time with him this week and you'd have already opened up to him about it, thus ridding yourself of this week long disturbance."

Minerva gratefully took the potion and downed it in one swallow, grimacing at the awful bitter taste. "Thank you for the potion and…" She stopped short of telling her friend just how right she had been about the whole situation. Deep down, Minerva knew she could trust Poppy with her most secretive thoughts but this was one time she needed to keep a slight distance. "…and thank you for being such an understanding friend. When I get this all sorted, I might share with you a bit of what's been happening this week but if not, please know that I trust you and if I could tell you, I certainly would."

"Understood and I'll be here for you if you need to talk things over with someone, other than Dumbledore." Poppy walked to the door and turned around before stepping into the hallway. "He cares a great deal about you, Minerva, and it's easy for all of us to see that he's been just as worried about you as we have been this week. And for what it's worth, I think he misses seeing you happy."

Minerva flopped down on the sofa and began nibbling on a piece of dry toast while sipping her tea. Surely Poppy wouldn't lie to her about Albus' worry and she had to admit she'd been limiting her interactions with him for fear of saying or doing something to give away her secret. In truth, it had been a very painful week for her as well.

Albus had a way of making even the most mundane tasks seem light hearted and fun, even down to working on his dreaded correspondence. Minerva always delighted in being able to help lighten his burdens, even though at times it put a much larger strain on her own work load. She always attributed it to the fact that simply being in his presence seemed to make her happier and she was certain that she smiled more when he was around.

Things can't go on like this! I am being eaten alive by my own conscious and if I don't tell him what I've seen, things will only get worse. No, it's best to go ahead and admit that I looked into his private journal and apologize. Then, if he chooses to get angry with me, at least there won't be a secret keeping us apart, only my curious nature and breach of trust.

Deciding to go ahead and write him a note before she lost all her resolve, Minerva summoned a quill and her special stationary Albus had given her as a Valentine's Day present. She looked down at the crème colored parchment with faint pink roses on it and smiled as she traced the outline of one of the petals. I hope you can forgive me, she thought as she pondered how to begin her note. In the end, she opted for something short and simple.

Dear Albus,

I'd like to speak to you about a private matter this evening, if it's convenient for you. I've been a bit preoccupied this week and I'd like a chance to explain.

Waiting hopefully,

Minerva

The sudden appearance of a letter floating in the air before him broke into Albus' sullen preoccupation. He plucked it out of the air in annoyance, ready to cast it aside, but stopped as he realized that it had been elf delivered. And if an elf had sent it to him then that meant it was from someone in the castle. A second glance at the envelope and his heart rate tripled. He recognized it instantly as the stationary he had given Minerva earlier that year on Valentine's Day.

Her familiar handwriting was on the outside and indeed the envelope was addressed to him, as if it would be for anyone else. He had never seen the elves make such a mistake, or any mistake for that matter. He tried to swallow but found his mouth to be rather parched at the moment. He reached over for his cup of tea and took a swallow. It was cold and bitter.

"How appropriate," he said to himself.

The sound of his voice, despondent and bitter as the tea had been, snapped him out of his melancholy mood. He had been sitting in his chair, staring at the fire and feeling very sorry for himself for the better part of three hours. He knew the only reason he had even slept during the night was because of the empty vial sitting on the counter in the loo.

Upon waking this morning and realizing that it had not all been a horrible nightmare, Albus' mind began to go over everything that had happened in the past week just as it had after he originally found out. Minerva had seen his sketches of her. He felt utterly horrible, he never meant for her to know of them. He knew it was a breach of their friendship and trust in each other that he had sketched her without her permission. And it was not just once but dozens of completed pictures were housed in that journal of his. A journal she had probably had plenty of time to go through.

He wondered how she felt. Was she shocked, horrified, disgusted or all of those and more. Their lunch that afternoon made more sense now of course, and her actions following it clearly showed her feelings on the matter as far as he was concerned. He had come to no conclusions on how to apologize and make everything right between them. If she left Hogwarts due to his invasion of her privacy he would never forgive himself.

Not allowing his mind to travel back down that path just yet, he looked at the object in his hands. The letter waited and seeing as how he had done this to himself, he opened it and unfolded the note inside. He read over the brief request to meet that evening and it did nothing to soothe his nerves. His stomach twisted painfully as he summoned a quill. Of course he would meet with her, he just wasn't sure what he was going to say.

A quick reply, suggesting her office as the place to meet and a time, was jotted down and sent off with a house elf. He didn't want her to feel uncomfortable by having them meet in his office. Hopefully a discussion in a setting that she was used to would make things easier. Still, Albus couldn't help but worry that tonight he would lose a professor, his Deputy and a dear friend.

Realizing the day would pass much too slowly if he worried over every detail he moved to his office and tried, once again, to tackle the pile of mail which had grown on his desk. The mountain of scrolls did not appeal to him in the least but it would give him something to do. The first letter was unbearable, the second nearly as bad, but by the time he was half way done he had immersed himself as much as he could in work under the circumstances. Still, if anyone had been watching they would have noticed long periods of time where he stared blankly into the air, a frown on his face.

It was not until the last letter had been sealed that he realized just how much time had gone by. Lunch had passed and tea time was approaching. His thoughts had never strayed far from Minerva but with his work completed he was once again overwhelmed by his feelings. He sighed and stood, stretching to relieve the soreness in his back. It was then that his eyes caught on the jeweled tin he had purchased for Minerva but had never gotten around to giving to her. Perhaps he would never have the opportunity now.

Deliberately looking away he moved to the back of his office and through the hidden door. The easel stood in the middle of the room and he walked over to remove the cloth which hid the painting it held. Minerva looked back at him, her eyes shining. He felt a tightness in his chest, as if his heart was being squeezed unmercifully. He at once loved the painting and hated it. For though it was of his Minerva, it was also part of the cause of the anguish he was now experiencing. She might not know of his painting but they were all linked together.

He moved to sit in the faded blue chair, studying his art with hungry eyes. It might be all he had left in a few hours time. He passed the rest of the day in that blue chair, summoning a small sandwich when hunger finally made its presence known, but never really tasting the food. When he stood because it was time to go, his heart was heavy with regret.

Minerva sat in her favorite chair in her office, unsure of how she should be feeling. On the one hand, Albus had sketched her without her permission but she really didn't care about that. What concerned her more was why he had done it? Was it just a fascination for her features or perhaps was there more to his motives than met the eye? Either way, the facts remained that he had sketched her on numerous occasions and she had indeed snooped through his personal belongings. And now that it was time to tell him what she'd done, she felt more nervous than she had ever been in her life.

Albus stood in the doorway of Minerva's office, peering though not voyeuristically, through the small opening, trying to decide if he could expect a full dose of Minerva's infamous wrath. Curiously though, what he saw on her face seemed to match his own feelings, at least to a certain degree. With a deep breath and a resolve to see this to the end, he stepped back and lightly rapped on her door, calling out her name as he did so.

Minerva's heart leapt into her throat as the moment of truth arrived with a soft knocking on her door. Immediately her hand flew to her hair, making sure it was all in place and as she stood she smoothed down her robes. "Please, come in Albus." Her voice was a bit shaky and she inwardly sighed. This was not going to be easy.

Stepping inside her office, as he had done thousands of times before, felt somewhat strange and unsettling. "I'm sorry I missed you earlier today at lunch. I was unusually distracted with my correspondence," he started though it wasn't anything at all like what he'd practiced back in his rooms.

"I assumed you were working on something very important and to be honest, I didn't go to lunch either." What she failed to admit was that she had spent her lunch worrying over this particular moment and how it would affect the rest of her life, especially if he couldn't forgive her for being so overly curious.

Albus nodded and smiled at her, hoping to cut through some of the tension that was rapidly filling the room. "Minerva, could…"

"Albus, let's…"

Both stopped in mid sentence and burst into a fit of soft laughter. "You first, my dear."

"I was going to suggest that we take a walk outside. It's a lovely warm night and I need a bit of fresh air." She looked up at him with hopeful eyes and was relieved to see a smile curling about his lips.

"Funny you should say that because I was going to suggest the same thing." He offered her his arm, despite his worry that she would absolutely reject the idea of being so close to him. However, he was not disappointed when she gratefully accepted it and her emerald eyes met his.

They walked in silence though the castle, no doubt each deep in thought about the looming discussion. When they were nearing the lake, Minerva decided she had wasted enough time and he deserved an apology.

"It's such a beautiful night I wish I could capture it forever someway. Unfortunately I'm not that talented."

This was it. This was the exact moment when his heart stopped and he would learn his fate. He wasn't prepared to hand over his journals but if that's what it took, he would gladly do so to gain Minerva's trust again. Yet, she hadn't mentioned anything about his sketches nor did she seem as angry as he had presumed her to be this afternoon.

"It is indeed a pleasant evening, almost like one an artist might sketch of a highland landscape." Inwardly, Albus cringed at his slip of the tongue. Why did he have to go and mention sketches, thus speeding up the entire conversation and any chance he might have had at prolonging their time spent together?

Minerva turned sharply as her heart suddenly stopped beating. There it was! The serious breach of trust that had been hanging between them for days had finally been acknowledged. It was now or never and never was not an option.

"Albus, I am so unbelievably sorry. I knew it was wrong but at the same time, I couldn't help myself. I've watched for years as you worked in that blue journal and when I saw it sitting there…I just…I…I am so ashamed of what I've done." Her cheeks were on fire both from the embarrassment and the panic welling up in her heart.

Listening but not daring to believe what he was hearing, Albus gripped Minerva's upper arms and forced her to look into his face. "What on earth are you apologizing to me for? I'm the one who has been deceitful and going behind your back, creating hundreds of images of you in my journal."

"You mean you're not angry with me or upset that I violated the trust you've put in me?" she asked with a shaking voice which was not like her at all.

"I could ask the same thing of you, my dear. I've been so worried ever since I realized you'd seen the sketches. I spent the entire afternoon scared half to death that I was about to lose you because of my folly."

She shook her head and warm tears began to fill her eyes. "They were very beautiful sketches of me and you are quite talented. I was so flattered and stunned when I saw them that it unsettled me a bit, but only in a good way. And then you came back suddenly, which startled me and I was afraid. Then, when I didn't readily admit to having seen them, my conscious began to eat me alive."

Albus breathed a huge sigh of relief and pulled Minerva into his arms, holding her tightly against his chest as a small breeze began to blow around them, rustling the leaves in the trees and creating soft ripples upon the water nearby. "Why didn't you simply ask me about them, my dear? I would have been surprised but would have gladly confessed that I've been drawing you for years now. That blue journal is only one of several books in my office. It was through those drawings that I realized…"

He stopped suddenly and Minerva could feel her heart pounding in her chest in anticipation of what he might have said. "Realized what?" she asked softly without daring to move for fear that he might pull away.

"I realized that I…I love you. Everything about you captivates me and by sketching you, I could capture all the little moments that brought me such joy when you were near. I know it might seem wrong but I assure you I never meant for you to see those entries nor had I planned to share them with anyone else. They were solely for this lonely old man who was pining away for the woman who is so far out of his reach that he dared not even ask for a chance with her."

"I thought the sketches were of me," she joked softly, hoping to lighten their mood a bit. Suddenly, Minerva's entire outlook on this situation changed. He had just said he loved her and that he actually considered himself not good enough for her. "I'm afraid this lonely old woman has given you the wrong perception. I have loved you for years, looking for any excuse to spend time with you and making sure that you were well cared for, as best I could. I was so shocked by what I found but only because I never thought you saw me as a woman…only as a colleague and friend."

Albus pulled back to look into her face. "I have always regarded you as a woman, a very attractive, witty, intelligent, unforgettable woman indeed. The longer I'm near you, the more I find to love about you." He couldn't believe what he was saying. It was all true of course, but he feared he might be overstepping his bounds rather quickly. After all, only a few moments ago he was sure his friendship with her was over and now here he was confessing his deepest secrets to her.

Minerva couldn't even begin to formulate a response to what she was hearing. For days she had worried herself sick over the idea of losing her best friend and now here they were admitting to long held feelings of deepest love and companionship. As if a light went off in her head, Minerva realized the time for words had passed and she slowly began to close the distance between them.

The moment Minerva's lips touched his, it was as if the planets aligned above and all the stars began to shine solely for them. A spark of energy coursed through her body, unlike anything she'd ever experienced, and that only served to encourage her to wrap her arms tightly around his neck and deepen the kiss.

Albus watched as Minerva's eyes fluttered closed and she began to inch closer to his face. Realizing what was about to happen, his tongue darted out to wet his lips a split second before his entire body flushed with exhilaration. Kissing her had always been a fantasy of his but never did he think it might happen this particular evening.

As her mouth parted, Albus took the opportunity to flick his tongue between her lips, caressing her and encouraging her to open herself to him further. His body was on fire from the sparks of pleasure coursing through him. One of his arms which held her close moved upwards to cup the back of her head.

A shudder of extreme excitement passed through Minerva's body as tiny goose bumps rose on her arms and seemed to travel all over her body, causing her nipples to harden and press against the fabric of her lacy bra. She faintly heard herself sigh, ever so softly, as she felt his skilled tongue dancing along her lips. She had no choice but to follow her instincts and part her lips further as her feet moved one step closer, bringing her fully into his arms.

His hand, which had cupped the back of her neck, was now tenderly cradling her head. Nimble fingers had worked their way into her hair and were sensually teasing the sensitive skin of her neck, causing her to lean back into his touch, hoping for more and silently wondering how those same fingers would feel skimming across other parts of her body.

An explosion of lights, sounds, and heat washed over her as their lips finally connected in that first passionate kiss. Her arms wound around his neck, holding him closely to her as she gripped the nape of his neck and used her fingertips to please him.

At first the kiss was soft, tender, exploring…each taking the time to enjoy the new sensations and tastes. He nibbled lovingly on her bottom lip then soothed the bite with his skilled tongue. Then he paused to kiss each corner of her mouth before slanting his lips across her, swallowing the soft moan that escaped her lips.

But soon it became evident that they each wanted more. Tongues began to battle in a sensual war, the likes of which neither had ever known before. Breaths were short and ragged, taking only the necessary second to refill the lungs before diving back into the delicious embrace with abandon. Neither knew nor cared how long they stood in the open, expressing years of pent up desire and longing. The only thing that mattered was the moment, the sheer exhilaration of being loved and returning that love.

They broke apart when a loud thundering voice sounded in the distance. "Come along Talon, the poor beast isn't going ter hurt yeh."

Each looked toward Hagrid's hut and saw a light flicker on inside the small house. "You don't suppose he saw us do you?" Minerva asked, though with little concern in her voice.

"It is unlikely my dear as we are somewhat hidden from his view. However, why don't we continue our walk? I do not feel the need to return to the castle just yet."

Minerva felt a shiver race down her spine as his fingers trailed across her cheek. "That sounds like an excellent idea."

A/N: For those of you on the board there will be one more chapter and then check the LEMON section. For those of you on fanfiction. net there will be one more chapter and then if you want the racy ending, you'll have to check the ADMM board.