Chapter 15
John "Lewis" ran down one of the side streets of the New Vegas strip. He alternated from looking ahead to looking behind to see if his pursuers were still after him. "What are the odds that I end up on the same drift station as the Gerfluxian royal family?" he swore. John and Jack had been on an assignment on Gerflux Prime which had ended in embarrassment for John and public scandal for the royal family. It all started because the two Time Agency scouts had spent the week long freighter trip to Gerflux Prime sampling the native ethanol spirits and getting thoroughly hammered. When they received their orders on the final day of the trip, Jack had been forced to drag John's barely conscious body to the briefing room. It was in that state that John was told to seduce the royal princess. When he got to the palace, John found a "princess". Unfortunately for him, it was the family's prized poodle which they named Princess. John had spent a week wooing and then bedding the quadruped instead of the young lady who was in line for the throne. Photos of the illicit affair had been leaked on the planetary net soon after Assistant Director Song gave them the recall order. John always suspected that the photos had been taken by his Time Agency partner as a joke.
John looked back again and saw the guards were getting closer. "Come on gents, it was a mistake anyone could have made!" he yelled over his shoulder. This only made the guards angrier and helped them put on a burst of speed. John turned to his left and ran out of the alley towards the entertainment venues of the Strip.
The sixth Doctor tossed some popcorn in the air and then caught it in his mouth as he and Peri walked out of the large auditorium. "That was actually amusing. It's nice to see someone take my advice every now and then. I think the show flows much better without the little guy yammering constantly," he referencing the Penn and Teller show they had just watched. He tossed more popcorn in the air.
"Yes, it was a very good show," Peri agreed. "N ow I would like you to tell me what was so dangerous to make the other you insist I not be involved?" she inquired, her tone steely. The sixth Doctor nearly choked on his popcorn. During the intermission, Peri had replayed the earlier conversation between the versions of the Doctor and realized what they had been up to. "It couldn't have been that dangerous if the other Doctor was willing to risk his girlfriend," she pointed out.
The sixth Doctor finished coughing and spat out the offending piece of popcorn before replying to Peri. "I don't need to explain myself to a human," he said haughtily. Peri's cold stare caused him to reconsider - he did share a TARDIS with the woman after all. "However, I will try to explain it in a way your limited intelligence can understand," he conceded. The sixth Doctor gestured in the direction his older self had gone. "Not all of New Vegas is a vacation spot. Like all places occupied by humans, there is a dangerous underside that keeps the rest looking respectable," he told her. "As for why Faith was allowed to go…Do you remember the stories I told you about Lela?" he asked.
Peri frowned for a moment while she tried to remember. 'Wasn't she the warrior woman you traveled with during your fourth life?" she asked.
The sixth Doctor nodded. "Yes, my little savage, I called her," he said. "Don't ask me how I know, but every fiber of my being tells me that Faith makes Lela look like Gandhi," he explained. "Quite a pleasant chap, but he cheated at poker. I think he hid extra aces in his over sized nappy," he muttered. "I'm quite certain that Faith is capable of taking care of that me as well as anything else that should pop up," he said.
Their conversation was halted when a man wearing a Victorian tuxedo darted out from an alley. He ran towards them and dived behind a small souvenir kiosk behind them. Peri and the sixth Doctor looked at each other, neither one knowing what was going on. The answer to the obvious question appeared in the form of a troop of guards dressed in gaudy jackets similar to the sixth Doctor's. The leader of the guards spotted them and rushed over.
The Captain of the Guard stopped exactly two paces in front of the sixth Doctor and did a ridiculously complicated salute. "My Lord, thank the 97 and half heavens that a member of the Council of Elders is here on the Gambling and Elvis i mpersonator Mecca," he exclaimed. "We spotted the accursed Defiler and chased him this way," he said proudly. "Did you see which way he ran?" the guard captain asked.
The sixth Doctor tapped his chin. "Refresh my memory, what does the Defiler look like again," he said.
The guard captain was surprised. Judging from the pattern on the man's coat, this was one of the highest ranking members of the Council of Elders. He shrugged his shoulders and did what the man asked. "A humanoid male, pale skin, with light brown hair. He was last seen wearing a black costume of some sort," the guard captain replied.
"He went that way," both Peri and the sixth Doctor said in unison. Much to the confusion of the guards, they were pointing in opposite directions down the street.
The sixth Doctor reached over and pulled Peri's arm so it pointed in the same direction as his. "Forgive my assistant, she's quite dense, but makes a wonderful cup of tea," he said. Peri glanced at him through narrowed eyes and silently promised that she would get him back for that.
The guard captain nodded. "Thank you, my Lord," he said. He motioned with arm to his troops. "This way men! We'll get the Defiler by the end of the day or my name isn't Baxter Buffoonish, the eighth," he promised his men. The guard troop double timed it down the street where the sixth Doctor had pointed.
Once the guards were safely out of sight, Peri leaned behind the kiosk and said, "You can come out now." She offered a hand to help him get up.
John was slow to respond. He was too busy enjoying the view down Peri's low cut dress as she leaned over. Like his partner, Jack, John was also an omnisexual. He shook his head, took her hand, and got to his feet. "Thanks," he said whole-heartedly (for both the save and the peep show.) Once he was standing, John went about brushing off his coat and pants.
Peri gently reached up and felt John's hair. "Love what you've done with your hair," she told him.
John frowned for a moment and tried to remember where he might have met this pair before. The woman was talking like she knew him. John had just received a haircut before coming on this mission.
"Where's your other half?" the sixth Doctor asked, looking around for Buffy.
That sealed it for John. He assumed they were talking about Jack and therefore must have been fellow agents. "Looking for the target on the other end of the Strip of course," he said simply.
On the other end of the Strip, Buffy and her husband, William "Spike" Summers, strolled down the street hand in hand. They had spent a couple of hours making love and then decided that they wanted to see the sights of New Vegas. Spike took in a deep breath. "That's amazing," he exclaimed. "They even managed to copy the smells of Las Vegas," he said, shaking his head in wonder. Buffy gave him a weird look. He had forgotten that Slayers didn't have the same super sense of smell that vampires did. Spike scrunched up his face as he fought for words to describe what he smelled. "I can smell excitement and despair floating in the wind. There's also a strong undercurrent of urgency swirling about," he explained. Another deep breath brought a wicked smile to his lips. "There's also a heavy dose of lust saturating everything," he said while raising an eyebrow suggestively.
Buffy rolled her eyes in mock annoyance. "Don't you ever get enough?" she teased.
"Never with you, pet, never," Spike replied. He gently brushed a blonde lock of hair from her face. She gently swatted his hand away.
"Later, Spike. Right now I want to see what the latest fashion is," she told him. Buffy grabbed Spike's hand and dragged him to a row of clothes shops.
When they passed a bench, Spike dug in his heels and refused to be pulled any farther. "Just because we're married doesn't mean I suddenly developed a taste for hanging out in a dress store while you try on their entire inventory," he said. Buffy made a pouty face, but didn't try to pull him towards he store. Spike dug into his tuxedo coat pocket and fumbled for a bit while he tried to find the card that had their pre-loaded credits on it. "How the hell does the Doctor make this look so easy?" he swore under his breath. He eventually found the card and handed it over to Buffy. "Go…have fun," he offered. "I'll just wait here while you shop. This looks like an excellent place to people watch," he said.
Buffy took the card, stood on her toes, and kissed Spike's cheek. "You're awesome. I'll try to make it a short shopping trip," she said before she rushed off to the nearest shop.
"Riiiiight," Spike said under his breath. He sat down on the bench and prepared himself for a marathon people watching session. After a few minutes, a figure walking down the street caught his attention. He watched as the tall, dark haired man came closer. "Nah…it can't be…not here," Spike tried to assure himself. As the man got even closer, Spike stood to get a better look. "Bugger me! It is him," he swore. Spike squared his shoulders and walked out into the street to intercept his one time nemesis. In truth, the man he was waiting for was more Angel's nemesis than his, but he had done Darla and Dru at the same time. Something the girls never let him or Angel try and that still irked Spike.
Spike looked through the window of the shop and saw Buffy looking over some clothes. "He better not try that kind of thing with Buffy," Spike said between clenched teeth. It was finally time for a talk with the Immortal.
Jack "Martin" walked down the street, humming one of his favorite show tunes. His meeting with his informant had given him much more information than he had expected. As things were now, he had a couple of hours to burn before his scheduled rendezvous with his partner, John. While humming, Jack watched an attractive Aplan couple walking on the other side of the street. All four of their heads looked very kissable. His attention was brought back to the street in front of him when a man stepped directly in his path. Jack stopped abruptly and then showed his trademark smile. "I wasn't expecting to see you so soon," he said to the man with the dyed blonde hair.
"There's an understatement," Spike said sarcastically.
Jack smiled even more. "I'm glad I ran into you early," he said. "I found out where the target is supposed to be," he told the man he assumed was his partner John. He was so excited about having a jump on their mission timetable, he reached forward, put a hand on either side of "John's" face, and kissed him soundly. "Love what you've done with hair," he whispered.
Something was nudging Buffy's awareness. She looked up from the silk like robe she was examining and glanced out the window. She dropped the robe in shock while she watched the Immortal and Spike share a kiss. "He never mentioned he knew the Immortal like that," she said. Buffy rushed out of the store to figure out what was going on.
Spike had been mentally running through all of the attacks that the Immortal would likely use. Snogging him senseless had not been one of them. He pushed the Immortal away and wiped his mouth with the back of his sleeve. "Get off!" he yelled.
"I always do," Jack assured him.
"Wait…what?" Spike exclaimed.
The men were interrupted by Buffy shoving each of the in the chest. "What the hell is going on here?" she yelled. She looked directly at Spike. "Forget that. Why are you sucking face with the Immortal?" she demanded.
"I know I can last for quite a while, but no one has ever called me 'the Immortal' before," Jack chuckled. Buffy and Spike both looked at Jack, confusion written all over their faces. Jack met Spike's eyes. "I got to hand it to you, this one is a lot better looking than the one from our last mission," he said, approving of his "partner's" choice in dalliances.
Spike shook off the feeling that everything had turned topsy-turvey. "Pet, I was wanting to kick his ass, not snog. That was completely his idea," Spike said, trying to clear his name.
The Slayer took a deep breath to calm herself and looked closer at the Immortal. She knew their meeting in Rome had been some three thousand years in the past, but she was sure she had made quite an impression on the Immortal in her journey to Rome. Buffy saw no sign that the legendary lover, fighter, and eternal Peter Pan recognized her. Buffy shot a warning look at Spike that had nothing to do with how angry she had been, but rather told him that something was up. Buffy turned so she was facing the Immortal. "Do you remember me at all?" she asked.
Jack upped his pheromone production and put all the charm he could muster into his smile. "Sorry, I wish I did. How about we create some new memories?" he offered while undressing her with his eyes.
Buffy turned to look at Spike. "It's him, all right," she said.
Spike nodded. "Yeah, but it's like he doesn't remember either of us. Angel and I spent years hunting him," he said. A thought suddenly occurred to him. From Buffy's expression, she had come to the same conclusion. "You don't think…that would mean…" he stammered.
Buffy nodded her head and looked back at the Immortal. "Another Time traveler, just like the Doctor," she said, confirming she and Spike were thinking along the same lines.
At the mention of the name "the Doctor", Jack tensed up. His boss, Assistant Director Song, had warned him to avoid that person at all costs, at least until she gave him the approval to make contact.