I'm back minna~san~! Thank you for all the nice reviews~! They make me smile so stupidly at the computer screen~! I seriously am very grateful for your kind reviews~. I am now on chapter five in my writing. I'll upload chapter four when that's finished. On a different note, it's snowing~! So I'm officially in Christmas mood. I'm also in a Nightmare Before Christmas mood. Maybe this'll show up in my writing lol.
Disclaimer: If I owned Naruto, Kisame would have his own harem.
"Who are these guys?" Dad asked, rather rude for him, staring at Itachi and Kisame. Anthony, my twin, recognized them instantaneously.
"Aren't they Itachi and Kisame from Naruto?" I stood up, gesturing the two to stay seated.
"So here's the thing. They're actually from Naruto. These two are the real Uchiha Itachi and Hoshigaki Kisame. They got turned into kittens and sent to our world and landed up on our doorstep." I said in a rush. "I secretly took them in a week ago and just found out not even an hour ago about this." I finished. My dad looked dumbstruck while I nervously curled my fingers.
"They're fictional?" was the first thing he asked. I nodded. "I guess we can keep them." I squealed and hugged my dad, giving him a kiss on the cheek.
"Thank you!" I whirled to face Itachi and Kisame, "It seems we're now housemates." Kisame laughed while Itachi, as always, remained impassive.
"So how many are there?" my dad asked. I gave a nervous smile.
"You're going to love this. There's ten of them." He didn't react like I expected. He just stood there looking blankly into space before nodding.
"We're going to have to do some shopping then. I don't think we have enough clothes for them." I suddenly got a devilish idea. Kakuzu would totally be up for it.
"Maybe you could leave that to me?" I asked, hopeful. Kisame was instantly staring a hole in my head at the change in tone. My dad shrugged then nodded.
"Sure. I'll drive." I held up a hand.
"We'll do it later. Right now, we have to change the Akatsuki back to their original forms." I looked to Itachi and Kisame. "Could you please bring everyone but Konan down?"
"Sure thing kiddo." Kisame ruffled my hair as he walked past. Itachi paused in his step before inclining a head toward me. I beamed and attempted to wink. It was terrible. Itachi patted my head softly, almost in a teasingly scolding manner, before following his partner. They were quick to bring the kittens down. Hidan was yowling as he and Kakuzu spat. I sighed. Maybe Hidan could stay a kitten for a while longer?
"So how'd you get Itachi and Kisame human?" Anthony asked curiously. I snorted with laughter.
"Kisame put a paw into my hot chocolate. I'm guessing Itachi did the same?" Kisame shook his head.
"No. After you left, Itachi-san kind of just turned back on his own. He wasn't anywhere near your drink." I filed this fact away.
"So it seems partners are connected?" I hypothesized.
"It appears that way, Sara-san." I rolled my eyes but didn't say anything else. Wordlessly, I began making more hot chocolate. It took about ten minutes for the water to reheat, but when it did I was ready with the cup and mixture.
"Ok, let me stir it before we see if it works on the others." I stirred fast, trying to get done sooner so I could glomp Sasori. "Here," I laid the steaming cup in front of them. The first one to confidently stick a paw into the chocolate was Hidan. A poof of smoke appeared, much like before. The instant it did I felt a hand grab my boob. I reacted much like anyone. Slap the bastard and scream at him till he learned not to grope people.
"You fucking zombie bitch! Bastard get the fuck off of my delicious breasts! They're too good for you motherfucker!" Of course, Hidan didn't let go. He actually squeezed them.
"Heh, they were as soft as they looked." Another poof of smoke flashed and a tentacle removed Hidan's hand. I looked in the direction of Kakuzu.
"Thank you Kakuzu dear!" I yelled. "I has a devilish idea that you might want to listen to," I added nonchalantly. Kakuzu raised a brow at me. "But not now dearest." I grabbed Pein and stuck his paw in the substance before more smoke poofed into existence.
...
..
.
Konan could understand why the others had left her. Once she regained her original form, she raided the girl's dresser for clothes. She held up a pair of ripped gray skinny jeans and a black and dark blue striped shirt that accentuated her chest. She had seen Sara wear it once or twice and had taken a liking to it. Thankfully, Sara was about the same size as the paper-using shinobi.
Konan wandered down stairs, drawn in by the voices of her comrades. She came into the kitchen, unprepared to see everyone but Kisame and Itachi completely naked.
"Sara-chan is so mean to Tobi!" Tobi wailed, flapping his arms. Sara had a panicked look on her face.
"You want to hug me, yet you're still naked! I don't want to get hugged by a naked Tobi! Think of the scars you'll inflict on my psyche Tobi! Think of the scars!" Konan gazed at the teen, allowing a small, amused smile to grace her lovely face. Sara felt someone's eyes on her and turned to glare at the perpetrator. When she noticed it was Konan, her eyes softened.
"Hi Konan dear." she greeted, moving closer to hug the woman. Konan was surprised but squeezed the girl in return. "Please make them put clothes on," the teen whimpered pitifully. Konan chuckled at the distraught girl and nodded.
"Of course Sara-chan." Konan directed a smile toward her fellow Akatsuki. "Minna, if you would please get dressed so we may discuss relations that would be best." The unclothed Akatsuki shuddered as they heard the promise of violence in her normally soft tone.
"Where can we obtain clothes?" Pein asked, turning to Sara. She gestured with her hand to follow after her. She walked a short distance around the corner and ventured into her brother's room. Her family had quickly gotten bored and went off to do whatever. She pulled a few boxers and pants from his drawers, along with a shirt for everyone but Hidan.
"Hurry guys hurry!" she urged, tossing clothes at everyone. The shinobi quickly dressed under the threat of Konan.
"Now, where shall we begin?" asked Pein as soon as Sara turned around.
She grinned.
...
..
.
"Pein-sama, if you would all come with me, we shall discuss everything." I told the orange haired shinobi. He stared with his Rinnegan before nodding solemnly.
"Very well." I gestured him to follow me back to my bedroom, because that was the biggest room in the house beside the basement. As we changed location, I noticed Deidara was standing unnaturally close to Sasori. He looked excited about something. I filed this away to analyze it later and ascended up the stairs to my room. I stood, waiting for the shinobi to become comfortable. Pein and Konan stood to my right, awaiting what I would say. Once everyone settled down I spoke.
"Hello Akatsuki. I'm Sara, but you may have noticed that. Um, well, how to put it exactly. You are in a different dimension. One where you're anime characters in an anime called Naruto drawn by the magical man known as Masashi Kisimoto." I calmly told the S-rank criminals.
"Fuck, seriously?!" Guess who? Hidan of course. I nodded, smirking.
"Yep. Luckily for you, I was the one who found you. Otherwise, you'd still be kittens, possibly for the rest of your lives." Everyone looked grim at that. I guess it wasn't so fun being a kitten after all. "We still have to figure out some things."
"Like what?" Kakuzu grumbled, "How to get money? I know nothing of your currency." I rolled my eyes.
"Oi fucker, not everything is about fucking money!" Hidan cursed at the immortal. "Jashin will devour your soul heathen bastard!" I shook my head at the hatred.
"Can you guys not argue for ten minutes?" I asked rhetorically. Kakuzu answered anyway.
"If this fool would just die then there would be no problem."
"Whatever. I'm willing to show my hospitality by letting you stay here until we figure out how to get you guys home." I said to mostly Pein. "Because guess what? You guys don't know the first thing about my world and it'd be dangerous to let you loose." Pein's gaze cut into my soul, debating.
"Thank you," he grit out, giving a slight tilt of his head. My tense shoulders relaxed.
"But there are some rules." I stated. "Please, no killing. I'm not gonna explain a dead body to my parents. That means no sacrificing Hidan. I'm sure Jashin understands. Next up. Money. If my parents can barely afford to feed two teenagers, then they can't afford ten criminals. You'll have to make money somehow. Pick pocket or something. Rob a bank maybe, but disguise yourself." I pointedly looked at Kakuzu. "Next up, no going anywhere without your partner and/or me or my brother. And always use a disguise, because some people will recognize you."
"And why should we listen to you, hm?" Deidara asked in a slightly rebellious tone. I raised a brow at him.
"Seriously Clown Demon? I just explained that you know nothing of this world. You wanna walk around there confused or not? Like it or not, you need me." Deidara backed down, grumbling under his breath.
"What about us?" Zetsu asked. "We eat people." Luckily for him, I had already thought of that.
"You can raid a morgue. It might not be fresh but hey, it's food." Zetsu sighed dejectedly. "I'm sorry Zetsu babe." I patted the plant man's shoulder. He sunk into the ground, his head just above the wood.
"Anything else?" Pein turned to me. I bit my thumb in thought.
"Not at the moment. Ok, I need to talk to Kakuzu in private." I grabbed the miser's arm and dragged him to the room in the hallway.
"What do you want?" he grumbled irritably. I gave a devilish grin.
"Well I was thinking that we could go shopping. And then I thought to myself, 'Huh how would Kakuzu figure out how to get clothes and food without paying?' Then it hit me. You'd just steal them! But our food and clothes stores are different. They have barcodes and labels and metal detectors that sense when someone tries to steal something. Not to mention all of the security cameras. But you're all ninja. I'm sure you can peel off the labels and barcodes and hide everything expertly. Well maybe not Deidara or Hidan. So what do you think?" He placed a hand on his chin.
"I'm sure I can think of something with this information." he grunted. Something hit me at that moment.
"Ne, Kakuzu, why is Tobi part of the Akatsuki? Sasori is still there so-" I froze as he gave me a dry look.
"Sasori died and Tobi took his place." I felt my jaw drop.
"Then how is Sasori here?" I hissed. Kakuzu shrugged nonchalantly.
"I don't know. Go ask him yourself." I skipped back to my room to find the Akatsuki talking quietly amongst themselves. I draped my arms around Sasori's neck, causing him to stiffen.
"Sasori-danna, I have to ask you something." I said. He didn't relax but turned his head slightly. I realized with slight astonishment that Sasori was breathing. He was a puppet, so why should he breath? And then I felt the warmth of his body and my mouth dropped open.
"What is it brat?" he snapped. I shook my head.
"You're alive." The Akatsuki around us stopped to stare.
"What do you mean he's alive, un?" Deidara asked. I rolled my eyes and grabbed his hand and pushed it against Sasori. He recoiled but I held fast.
"Besides the obvious fact that he died, Sasori is breathing and warm. Isn't he a puppet made of wood? He shouldn't be breathing or have any kind of warmth." It clicked in the blonde's head. God this is why I hated being blonde in the first place. People assume you're stupid because of your hair color.
"Sasori," I let him go and turned him around, "tell us what happened to you." He sighed.
"Like you said, I died. I just kind of floated in this place of complete darkness until I met my parents. We sat and talked around a fire and the next thing I know, I'm in a box with these guys." It sounded like the experience that Kakashi went through when Pein killed him. I glanced around at the other Akatsuki.
"Did anyone else die?" I directed toward the S-rank criminals. They all shook their heads.
"We were dividing up who chased what. But we did capture the Two Tails." Kisame supplied. I breathed a sigh of relief. Kakuzu and Hidan were the next to die if I remembered correctly.
"Good, ok I can work with that." I sighed. "Ok, Itachi-san, Sasori-danna and...Konan-chan. Would you like to accompany Kakuzu and I to the mall? We need to do some serious 'shopping'." They each nodded their assent. "Ok great! Ano, Leader-sama, can you make sure the rest of these guys behave please?"
"I will not have them disrespect our gracious host. Consider it done." I smiled and wanted to give him a hug.
"Thank you so much Leader-sama!" I glomped him quickly before leading the others out. "Come on guys, we gots us some shopping to do!"
This ought to be good.
That's it! Drop a review and let me know how you like it. I get those little fuzzy feelings whenever I see a new review/favorite/follower. Well, I'm off to write that essay on Napoleon that's due tomorrow~! Adios~!