A/N: So we are heading into Buggy the Clown Arc territory. Just so you know
Chapter three - Stupid feelings
"I'm so hungry!" I groaned at the two boys I was currently sharing the boat with.
"Yeah and so are we!" Zoro replied irritably. I lifted my head and glared at the two boys.
"But it isn't my fault, I assumed that at least one of you would think to grab some food before we left. It's not like I could, since I'm completely broke." I snapped. "I mean, I knew you wouldn't get enough food but seriously, who doesn't bring any."
I groaned again as the boat lurched, sending my empty stomach into a wild wave of nausea. I was exhausted as well, having only had a wooden floor to curl up on. I generally used Luffy as a pillow though, since he was slightly squishy. My ribs had mostly healed, though they were still tender and I knew if I did anything to set them off they would get worse again.
I wonder how they have healed so fast, I thought to myself. I had cracked my ribs before and it took about two weeks before I could actually breathe without feeling like someone was stabbing me repeatedly in the side. Maybe biology, like physics, does not apply in the one piece realm. I looked at my captain as he stretched his arm around the mast for... well... who knows what reason. Yeah science doesn't apply here. I thought shaking my head.
I sat up and tapped my chin thoughtfully, having just recalled that Luffy should get carried off by a bird sometime soon, we had after all been floating out here for a week. I chewed my lip. I should strap my ribs, just in case. I sighed and pulled my bag closer to me, I pulled out a jelly snake (I had found a bag of them along with some cake in my back pack just after we left. ) and chewed at the light snack, listlessly fishing around the bottomless pit I carried everything in for a bandage.
Gripping the firm compression bandage that had served me well over the course of more than a few sprains, I pulled the beige coloured material into the open air and turned to face the boys. I knew I didn't really have to worry about these two, but I still had my reservations about stripping in front of them.
"Alright, I'm going to turn around, and you're both going to stay over that side of the boat." I looked at them warningly. They both seemed confused.
I inwardly sighed, Clueless idiots. Turning my back to the two, I knelt on my knees and pulled my shirt off.
"Wow you've lost a lot of weight Taylor." Luffy said innocently. I looked down at myself, shocked. I really had. I was just beginning to make out my ribcage and my bra strap felt a little loose. I pulled at my skin frowning, I'd lost some muscle as well.
"Of course I've lost weight moron, I've been starving for the past week." I growled out, reaching behind my back and undoing my bra with my left hand. I slipped it off and immediately started blushing, stupid large breasts, couldn't lose tem could I nooo, it had to be muscle. I crossed my right arm cross them and pressed the end of the bandage against my left side.
"You realise that's not going to work, right." Zoro called from somewhere behind me.
"Shut up." I rolled the bandage across my back and to the edge of the bruise I had obtained. The edges had turned a sickly yellow but the middle was still a fairly dark blue. "Shit," I said, realising my predicament. If only I had another hand.
Zoro laughed and I blushed harder, If only I had sticky bandage.
"What are you doing?" Luffy's voice chirped, right in front of my voice. Letting go of the bandage with my left hand and keeping my right arm firmly in place, I swung a strong left hook into Luffy's cheek and he recoiled his stretched neck. "What'd you hit me for?" Luffy whined.
I turned and face the boy and began ranting at him about common decency and listening when someone asks you to do something. Mean while Zoro started laughing, I guess the sight of a half naked five foot two woman roaring at a trembling Luffy huddled in the corner of the small dingy was fairly entertaining.
"And you!" I turned and pointed a finger at Zoro, he stopped laughing. "Give me a hand." Did he just sigh in relief? I thought silently, wondering if I had really been that scary.
Zoro gave a short, half-hearted complaint before complying. He picked the slightly unravelled bandage up sat behind me. he placed the bandage at the top of the bruise and looked at my arm.
"Are you planning on having that wrapped up to?" He cocked an eyebrow at me. Shit. That would defeat the whole purpose of strapping them. I sighed heavily and dropped my arm, letting him pull the bandage across my chest. As I suspected he never let his hands wander, keeping his fingertips on the bandage at all times.
"Thank you," I grumble once the painfully awkward ordeal was over.
He grunted in reply and returned to his corner of the boat.
"So Taylor, are we gunna have some more adventures soon?" Luffy chirped as I pulled my basketball shorts and baggy black T-shirt out of my bag. None of us had changed our clothes in the past week but I had at least taken advantage of the long boring days of nothingness to rinse my dirty clothes in the ocean.
"What gives you that impression?" I asked, slipping my t-shirt on over my head.
"You're changing your clothes and stuff, you haven't done that at all since we headed off." I raised an eyebrow, surprised by this out of character observation.
"Well in that case, yes we are." I said smiling. I slipped my shorts on under my skirt and pulled the impractical clothing item off. My shorts were a little looser than usual around my legs, thank god they had an elastic waist band, because I always pull drawstrings out of hoodies and pants.
I glanced behind me and up into the sky, Is there really a black dot in the sky or am I just imagining it because I'm going insane with boredom? I narrowed my eyes but I couldn't really tell one way or the other.
Zoro scoffed, he still had a hard time believing I could in fact "see the future." That was fine by me, I'd just have to prove myself. Luffy on the other hand would have believed me without any proof what so ever. I shook my head as he began chanting about an exciting adventure.
"You best keep an eye out for your navigator Luffy," I grinned, but sharply turned around to glare at Zoro. "Never turn your back on an opponent." I said sharply.
"No shit." He waved his hand at my warning dismissively. If Buggy doesn't stab him, I will. I promptly decided before walking over to Luffy and throwing my arm around his waist, since his shoulders were too high for me to reach comfortably. Luffy was looking up into the sky.
"What are you looking at, you dope." I said cautiously, not really wanting to look up in case it was in fact the bird. I looked up anyway and sighed.
I took a couple of steps back, so that I was behind Zoro and watched on, trying not to laugh.
"A bird..." Zoro said, looking up with the rest of us.
"Let's eat it!" Luffy said grinning.
"How?" Zoro looked at his captain, raising his eyebrow.
"Leave it to me. Gum Gum Rocket!" And with that Luffy shot into the air and gave a yell when his head became stuck in the beak of the giant bird.
"You dumbass what are you doing!" Zoro growled at his moronic captain. I had been overcome by a fit of laughter at the sight of his face when he picked up the oars and began rowing ferociously. He looked like he was going to eat Luffy when he got his hands on him.
"It's not funny woman, get up and help me!" He roared nudging me gently in the shoulder with his boot. I pulled myself up off the bottom of the boat, trying to stop laughing. I had tears running down my cheeks, classic Luffy, I thought wiping them away and turning to look at the bobbing figures in the water just ahead of us.
"Hey. Please stop!" One of the stranded pirates called waving his arms.
"Don't worry, they can grab on as we go past." I said to Zoro. "We aren't stopping, you'll have to jump on!" I called out to the three
"What?!"
" You actually got on." Zoro said without sparing a glance at the three.
"Are you trying to kill us!" The three shouted at us. I took a step back from them and set my feet, knowing exactly what was going to happen next.
"Hey, stop this boat." One of them drew their sword. "We're the crew of Buggy the Clown. We're taking over this ship."
Zoro turned and looked at them darkly, note to self, stay on Zoro's good side. I thought taking a step away from the green haired man. Zoro promptly disarmed the closest one and I decided that standing around uselessly was boring and decided to aim a strong kick to one of the other pirates groin before using a palm strike to break his nose.
I wiped my left hand on my basketball shorts. "Ewww I touched him." I whined at Zoro. He had already taken care of the other two. He looked over at my victim, who was currently rolling around grasping his family jewels with one hand and his bleeding nose with his other.
"tsk. Now he's going to bleed all over the boat." He said looking at me with a smirk, "you can clean it up."
I looked at the pirate in horror, God knows how many diseases he has! I qickly hefted him up by the back of his neck and hung his head over the side of the ship. "I have to warn you," I whispered darkly, "I know how to remove a man's nuts, bleed on this ship and I will show you how." He whimpered in response.
I turned back to Zoro who had the other two rowing the boat for him. He seemed to have caught my whispered warning and he looked at me with the slightest hint of worry. Bet he wouldn't of strapped my ribs if he knew that, I thought humourlessly. I gave him a fake sweet smile and he turned back to his new slaves.
"Who would've thought that you were the famous pirate hunter Zoro! Please forgive us!" They whimpered. He continued to scowl at them. Wow Zoro, did you eat a bucket of lemons this morning. I thought feeling slightly sorry for the pirates he was terrifying.
"Because of you I lost sight of my friend." He said. "Just keep rowing straight."
"Actually," I said turning my head over my shoulder, but keeping my left hand firmly around the pirate I had actually managed to horrify. "If you could take us to where your captain is, that'd be a lot easier. That's where he'll be."
Zoro looked at me sceptically. I sighed, "look, I know that's where he is going but if you want I can explain it using a more believable approach." I turned back to our rowers. "Captain Buggy is in a town right?" They nodded.
"Well, that bird will be heading to a landmass. And I assume that where Buggy is stationed is the closest land mass in that general direction?" I pointed in the direction the giant bird had disappeared with Luffy in.
"That's right." One of them confirmed. I looked at Zoro, and gave a huff.
"Fine. Go there then."
After a while, the pirate I had mutilated joined the other two, he looked pretty miserable, his nose was still crooked since the moron hadn't thought to straighten it himself.
"What do we do now?" One of the pirates asked.
"Good question. If captain Buggy finds out a girl stole our boat and our treasure, we're history!" The broken nosed man replied.
I glared at him. A girl, eh? I'll give him a girl. I let out a low growl that only Zoro could hear and he patted me lightly on the shoulder, before shifting out of my reach, obviously he could sense anger rippling from my body.
Stupid men, thinking they're better than me, won't even let me buy a freaking meal for them 'cause it'll hurt their pride. I thought to myself. Why can't I find women attractive? Though they aren't much better. Stupid brain finding stuff attractive. Like Men with messy hair... shirtless men with abs... Gah...
When I came back to the present Zoro was looking at me with curiosity. I blushed, why does my brain always take such a random tangent. It's not like I'm a sixteen year old anymore, this is what happens when you're stuck in such close quarters with attractive guys for a week... I quickly cut that train of thought off. I must have missed the rest of the conversation, I thought noting that the three Buggy pirates were now silent.
"What," I said rubbing my palms together awkwardly.
"Just wondering what you were thinking about that could possibly cause you to go from oozing hatred to drooling." Zoro said shaking his head.
"Well, maybe one day I'll tell you." I stuck my tongue out and punched him lightly in the arm. I'll never tell you. I thought to myself, unless I'm really, really drunk. Oh, that reminds me. "Zoro, how much alcohol is in a bottle of Sake?"
"I dunno, why?" He said obviously confused over where that came from.
"Jus' wondering. " And we lapsed into a comfortable silence, waiting for the boat to reach what ever island Luffy had landed on.
A/N: Sorry nothing overly exciting happens here. I'll try to make up for it next time. I should have finished this yesterday to tell the truth, but I was to busy moping around because the doctor's think I have whooping cough :/ please review :)