Chapter 3 The Secret

Remus stared at him for a moment and then stammered, "Someone else escaped?!"

"Well it wasn't really an escape," Harry muttered. "It was more like a trick. Barty Crouch's son traded places with his mother using the Polyjuice potion. She was dying anyway and ended up dying in Azkaban still transformed in his body. They buried what they thought was Crouch never knowing it was his mother. Crouch transformed into Mad-eye Moody during the Tri-wizard Tournament. That's when he tried to kill me," Harry said and stopped, looking at the table once again.

"Harry it seems there have been quite a few people who wanted to kill you and didn't. Let's keep it that way shall we?" Harry saw the smile on the man's face and nodded. Remus continued, "They're in there now talking about whether you should go with them to rescue Hermione…"

"I…" Harry didn't finish.

"I already know what you're going to say Harry," Remus held his hand up and eased himself out of the chair. "I told them you couldn't be stopped. Not that I blame you, I would have done the same for my friends."

Harry stood with him. "Remus, thanks for standing by me and...as far as what went on here..." he suddenly felt embarrassed by the tears drying on his face.

"You weren't watching, Harry. I shed a few tears of my own now and again." He waved a handkerchief in the air and then quickly stuffed it into a pocket in his robe. He turned at the door and stopped to add, "There's someone else you should be thanking Harry."

Harry shot him a questioning look.

"Severus Snape," Remus said.

"Snape!" Harry snarled.

"Yes, Harry. He did all he could to protect and stop Sirius from going to the Department of Mysteries and to help you. When we knew Voldemort had people watching Privet Drive, Snape was the first to offer to go after you. He carried you back in his arms and wouldn't let anyone do anything for you, except himself."

Lupin closed the door once again and leaned against it. "I assume you know he plays a double role with Voldemort." Remus waited until Harry nodded. "Harry, every step he takes, he takes a risk in exposing himself. He plays a very dangerous game, one that will most likely end in his death. And a very horrible death it could be," Remus finished and opened the door. "We need to direct our energy into doing something constructive instead of dwelling on the past."

Harry was thinking of the Pensieve and the previous year when he had stumbled on Snape's past. Snape's subsequent behavior had driven any doubt from his mind about what kind of a man he was. It seemed he couldn't help himself but channel all of his pent-up rage at the man and was very close even now to getting angry at Lupin, where a moment before he had felt a warm closeness.

Lupin watched him closely and nodded. "You saw what we did to him in that Pensieve. You asked Sirius and me about it. James and Sirius were my closest friends, but they never really knew what it is like to experience that kind of cruelty. I always found it so very strange they could accept a wer…someone like me, and treat me with great kindness and loyalty and then turn on someone like Severus."

"He's a hateful, unfair, spiteful…" Harry spit out the words unwilling to give an inch.

Remus nodded, his arms folded over his chest, his face grim and then said calmly, "There was one person who saw something worthwhile in him."

Harry stopped at the door unwilling to hear anymore, ready to push past him until Lupin put out a hand to stop him. Harry turned and snapped, "Who would that have been?" They were inches apart.

Lupin's face softened and the look he had in his eyes seemed to be of another, far away time. He answered very softly as if talking to himself, "Lily. Lily Potter."

Harry mouthed the words, 'What?!'

Lupin nodded, "Yes, your mother. We are venturing out to do something in which none of us may survive. I don't know why Severus treats you the way he does, but I have seen another side, I know of another side to him. The truth is Harry, you are a danger to me and anyone who goes with us if you cannot control these feelings you have about him."

Harry thought about it. They stood staring at each other. Harry finally asked, "What did my mother do?"

Lupin's head dropped and he studied the floor, his shoulder against the wall as if bracing himself.

"Remus?" Harry reached out as if to grab hold of him. "There can't be any secrets between us if you hope to have my trust. I tell you now, I am on the edge. Dumbledore kept the truth from me all of these years. I have nothing, no family, no place to call home. I have my friends and I fear being anywhere near them because I watched Ron and Hermione get hurt and there was a moment when I thought I'd lost them both. I tell you... I need something... that will help me go on."

"She was his friend," Lupin answered simply. The head came up and his gray eyes studied him. The lips that normally curved into a smile were a pencil -thin, even line and barely hidden by the small mustache.

Harry frowned and said, "But I saw him call her a…a mud blood. He was horrible to her!" he stammered, feeling confused.

Lupin nodded and answered, "When other people were present… when your father was present... Yes. I saw it happen if you remember. I was there. But I also saw them together when no one else was around. When your father wasn't there, or Sirius. Severus was a very different person then." He shrugged. " Like we all can be."

"Are you saying," Harry gulped, "That my mother loved him?"

Lupin shook his head, frowning slightly, "No, I'm not saying that at all. I don't know that for a fact. I just knew your mother," he said emphatically and continued, "Her heart always went out to people like him and…me. No. What I'm saying Harry is that she was a friend to him, perhaps the only one he ever had, and it made a difference. It really did!"

Harry took in the information and then jerked his head towards the hallway. "Perhaps we should go in."

Lupin nodded.

Harry thought about their conversation as they walked down the hall together. He desperately wished he could have known his parents and then again he wished people would stop telling him things about them. Sometimes he was tired of being alone and not having anyone to depend on. Trying to reach out to the dead for comfort was like trying to grab a wisp of smoke.

They stepped into the room. Remus had been right. They were in tight groups. Ron was arguing with his parents, and Snape was talking to Moses in a language Harry couldn't understand. They stopped when Harry and Lupin entered.

"Harry!" Ron was at his side in a minute. "I want to go with you."

"I won't have it," Mrs. Weasley started, charging over to them dragging her husband by the arm. "Arthur you cannot let your son go to Azkaban!"

Arthur Weasley was nodding in agreement. "This is too dangerous," he said.

"Too dangerous for me but not, Harry?" Ron asked, his face reddening.

"What they are saying is they don't have the right to stop me," Harry said. "I don't have parents or a guardian to tell me I can't go."

"Then, I will tell you you cannot go," Snape said, breaking in. His manner was surly and he glared at Harry. Moses said something to him so softly the words could not be understood. Snape retorted in the same language.

Moses turned to them. "I am the one who chooses. Pashal and I shall go, as will Harry. If there is a chance that he meets the Kalo Beng then we will help fight him. I think we cannot keep him from this friend who is imprisoned there." The man smiled, the gold tooth glinting in the dim light of the library. Harry noticed that no matter the subject the man seemed to be full of good humor.

"I will go along with you," Lupin said firmly.

Moses suddenly frowned and said, "You are a werewolf. I would not have you by my side. You are marime."

Snape snapped a surprised look at the man but remained silent.

Even though Harry didn't know what the word meant it was clear it was disparaging. Harry stepped up and said, "I want him with me."

Moses seemed to be deliberating and then nodded slowly. "Very well, but he will have to take the cure first."

The room was silent.

Lupin stepped forward, almost stumbling and gasped, "Cure?!" His hand was clenched to his chest and he looked deathly pale.

Moses nodded, and replied, "It is difficult, but our healer, the drabengo, can cure this. We have to travel to the kumpania to see him. This we will do tonight."

"Cure?" Lupin said it again in shock. He looked at Snape who turned to Moses and said something to him in the man's own language.

"Yes, Lupin," Snape said as he listened to the Gypsy talk, "Moses says they have a healer in their encampment who he thinks knows how to cure lycanthropy." Snape said it slowly. He spoke to Moses again and again he nodded. "Yes, he says they have a cure."

Remus slipped down into a chair while the Weasley's patted him and congratulated him. Harry continued to watch Snape. The man stared back, his dark cold eyes squinting at him, completely ignoring the noise and commotion in the room.

"What?" Harry finally asked, angrily. The question was directed at the man.

"Are you sure you are up to this Potter?" Snape asked. "We cannot have anyone along who can't carry their weight. You're spell work is poor and you are physically weak."

"I didn't try and kill myself, Professor!" Harry snapped.

Snape snorted and turned away.

"I'm surprised, Snape," Harry bellowed. "You're missing out on a golden opportunity to turn me over to Voldemort. That's what you really want to do isn't it?" Ron's face paled, Arthur and Molly Weasley glanced up with alarm.

Lupin quickly shot to his feet, and hissed, "Harry!"

"No, Lupin, let him talk," Snape cut in, turning back to him. He walked slowly across the room and towered over Harry. They were less than a foot apart. "Let's have it, Potter. Say what's on your mind."

"I think I've said it," Harry said calmly. "I think this is a trap. Who's to say you weren't the one who kidnapped Hermione and turned her over to Malfoy. How do we know she's at Azkaban? Why should I trust anything you say? I'm putting my life in your hands the minute I step out the door."

"Yes, you are, Potter," Snape replied. "However, I would be very careful if I were you. I can be a very dangerous man."

"Why do you hate me so much?" Harry whispered. He tried to read what was behind the coal-black eyes staring back at him. The face remained unmoved and Snape was about to turn away when Harry reached out and stopped him, grabbing him on the arm. He'd spent the last hours with his emotions whipped around by every gust of wind blowing by. He grasped the arm with all the strength he had left and set his jaw. "Tell me that," he snarled. " I just need to know that!"

Snape jerked his arm and tried to pull away. Harry didn't let go, couldn't let go, because his knees buckled and the room began to swim before his eyes. He held on to the only thing keeping him from falling face forward onto the floor, Snape's arm.

Waking up in bed, Harry decided, was slowly becoming a bore. The room was still swimming before his eyes when he opened them. He felt nauseous and closed them again hoping the feeling would dissipate. When he finally felt he could manage he opened his eyes and saw Snape standing by the bed. Harry looked up and remained silent.

"I will say two things Potter. Are you awake enough to understand me?" Snape asked quietly.

Harry nodded.

When you were at your Aunt's house, they let someone in to see you. Someone they thought you knew. That person told them she was checking on you. It's my understanding an arrangement was made for someone to check on you every so many days to make sure you were alright?" Snape's eyebrow went up like a question mark.

Harry nodded.

"That person also saw you had been drinking sleeping potion. They took the opportunity to return several times. They put poison in the potion. You have not recovered because the poison is still having an effect," Snape said.

Harry's eyes widened as he listened. Poisoned! he thought and felt some surprise.

"Minutes ago Moses received a message, Mr. Potter. Not only did they kidnap Miss Granger," Snape said slowly, "that person is responsible for poisoning you.

Harry swallowed hard. This time he nodded more slowly.

"The poison is slow-acting, although you are experiencing the effects of it even now. Since you were in poor health to begin with I think it may be working faster than even Malfoy thought possible."

"How long?" Harry asked.

"Days," Snape replied. "It will become more difficult as time passes."

Harry turned to look at the canopy over the bed and felt a slight panic. "Who came to see me? Who put the poison in my sleeping potion?" When he didn't hear anything he turned his head.

"Hermione Granger," Snape answered.

"It couldn't be," Harry said, shaking his head slowly.

"Probably wasn't," Snape answered. "It was probably a servant of the Dark Lord. He would not endanger himself by doing it himself but he would send someone. He has sent word to Dumbledore he has an antidote. By giving you poison and then dangling the antidote before us his message is clear."

"He wants me to come to him."

"He is, after all, the only one who can kill you."

Harry thought about it, the sour taste of fear in his throat. He pulled himself up and tried to reach for a glass of water at the bedside. Snape leaned over and handed it to him. Harry nodded his thanks. "What was the other thing you were going to say?"

Snape pulled a vial from his coat pocket and handed it to him. "Drink this. It will help you stay on your feet."

Harry took the vial and looked at the clear green contents.

"Contrary to what you believe, I am not trying to kill you," Snape said.

Harry opened the vial and drank the liquid. He immediately began to feel better. "Well?"

"I didn't have a chance to answer your question before you passed out." Snape pulled his cloak aside and sat down in the chair near the bed. "I have a story to tell you. I ask only that you keep it to yourself and never tell another living soul."

Harry frowned at the man sitting at the side of the bed. He finally nodded and said, "I promise."

Two hours later Snape closed the door to the bedroom leaving Harry in the darkened room looking out at the setting sun.