AN: Greenloki, you are the best beta anyone could have. You made this story a thousand times better! Thank you for supporting me and for asking this to be your birthday-story! I'm having a blast with it!

The Lover That Went Wrong

- Chapter Four -

"What does that do?" Loki didn't bother hiding his dismay or curiosity. It made the doctors around him edgy and nervous and he had laughed for five minutes when one had dropped a syringe just because he'd winked at him. How easily thrown off guard mortals were! But he had cut it out after Tony had asked him to – though he wasn't sure why he'd stopped playing around with the mortals inside the medical room. Perhaps he just wanted to get this examination over with as quickly as possible. Being inside a SHIELD facility agitated him, made him feel nervous no matter how many times Tony had promised him that nothing would happen to him. He might be the god of mischief and lies, but it was these SHIELD agents that weren't to be trusted.

"The technique I'm going to use is called obstetric sonography which basically means that I'm going to make an ultrasound," The doctor preparing the device explained. He was one of the few that didn't seem close to having a nervous breakdown around Loki. He didn't even avoid looking into his crimson eyes. It led Loki to believe he was a more seasoned employee of SHIELD, one that wasn't scared so easily. Perhaps he had dealt with worse than a pregnant Frost Giant. "It will allow me to create an image of your child so we can see if he's growing well."

With narrowed eyes, Loki watched as a nurse lifted his linen shirt and exposed his expanded belly. More lines marked his skin and he could tell she stared at them for a moment. He was seconds away from flicking some sparks of electricity at her – surely that would have her screaming and running to the other end of this world – when she suddenly poured cold gel onto his skin. The coldness was a surprise since he was in his frost giant form, yet it was there and it made Loki hiss. It was official now. He hated that nurse but before he could do anything, like turn her into a mouse, she stepped back and the doctor replaced her.

The doctor pressed a small probe to the skin of his lower belly and for the briefest moment nothing happened. Loki could feel his chest tighten, afraid that something was wrong, but then the screen of the machine lit up and Loki found himself staring at the image. His child. He could recognize tiny hands and feet, little arms and little legs. He spotted the neck and a little round head. But most of all he heard. The child's strong heartbeat echoed through the room and Loki didn't know what to think of it, other than he found it strangely soothing.

His attention was diverted to his left side when a warm hand covered his own. Warm brown eyes connected with his crimson ones and Loki watched as the edges of Tony's lips curved upward in a kind, uplifting smile. For a moment, Loki dared to believe that Tony seemed happy, but he wasn't naïve. He wasn't foolish enough to believe that they could have happiness together.

"Everything looks fine," The doctor said, drawing back Loki's attention.

Loki stared at the screen again, witnessing the actual beating of his child's heart. He swallowed away whatever emotions were threatening to overtake him.

"It's a boy, but you already knew that," The doctor smiled.

Loki could only nod. He hadn't actually been certain that the baby was a boy, but somehow he'd had a feeling, like instinct telling him and trying to assure him that all was well. Still, seeing the image of the child on the screen comforted him. No two heads. Just one healthy boy. Loki wished he could see more details. Would it have blue skin like him or pink like Tony? Would he have red eyes or brown? Would he have his mischief or Tony's bravery?

The nurse wiped away the gel with a few paper-towels before pulling Loki's green shirt back down. She avoided looking into his eyes and while that would have Loki gritting his teeth earlier, he couldn't care less now.

"You're six months pregnant," The doctor continued, "Calculating by the length and weight of your baby, I would say you'll have to carry for another three months, like a normal, human pregnancy. I'd like to make another ultrasound in four weeks' time. Would that be okay?"

"Yes," Loki replied.

Loki shifted his legs over the edge of the bed and stood. A part of him liked that Tony instantly came to stand by his side while another part wanted to shove him aside, possibly make him trip and see him land face-first on the floor. He decided to just ignore him.

"Thank you, doctor." He wasn't one to thank mortals, but this doctor had eased his mind. At least now he could relax and perhaps … enjoy his time with the child inside of him.

-/-

Silence and darkness surrounded him and while Loki would once have enjoyed that, he couldn't anymore. If it didn't remind him of his time alone, traveling unknown worlds, falling into Thanos' hands, it reminded him of his seclusion in Asgard. It reminded him of centuries of isolation, left in shadows, ignored. For the briefest moment he'd had something else, a moment of hope, of clarity, light, but Loki had destroyed that. Not only had he left Tony, but he'd come back and destroyed his life, too. Wasn't that what he had done? Destroyed Tony's life? That man was destined for greatness here on earth, and now he was stuck with a child of his former mortal enemy.

Loki felt like he had tainted Stark and while that once made him marvel, he now felt … guilty. Or was he making too many allusions? Delusions? He couldn't deny the way Tony had looked at him earlier that day, smiling, with warmth in his eyes. While he felt he had ruined Tony, ruined all that he was and could be, he knew that Tony would disagree. Perhaps that was what irritated him most of all. He reveled at destruction, reveled at the sight of people crumbling beneath his touch, but Tony hadn't crumbled.

Sighing, Loki turned to lie on his back. The bed lay comfortable and the sheets were soft, but he just could not fall asleep. The boy kicked then, hitting Loki's kidney with mesmerizing precision, and Loki sucked in a deep breath in an attempt to cope with the sharp pain. He still wasn't used to having life within him, to feel the boy so active while he was still so small.

Life. He hadn't thought it possible that he could even produce life. He had thought his legacy within the Nine Realms would be nothing but carnage and ruin. Ragnarok. He had a chance to change that now.

With one hand, he rubbed his swollen belly, hoping that it would soothe the child within him and it seemed to help. But it didn't soothe him. He continued to lie in bed, staring up at the dark ceiling while his thoughts drifted to Tony. The man was probably snoring loudly, lost in a dream world where he had no thoughts of Loki or the child.

He cursed Tony.

Throwing aside the sheets covering his body, he climbed out of bed with less grace than he liked and silently padded across his room or again, not that silent. He was heavier than usual after all and swiftness was a skill he'd lost a long time ago. One advantage of wearing his natural Jotun-form was that he could see better in the dark, but Loki quickly decided it was the only advantage.

He slowly made his way down the hall and after a moment's hesitation he snuck into Tony's bedroom. Silence met him and Loki briefly thought the mortal wasn't there – which wouldn't surprise him since Tony liked working during the night – but then the sound of calm, steady breathing reached his ears.

Still cursing him because it became harder and harder to understand just what effect Tony had on him, Loki made his way toward the bed. He lifted the sheets and crawled underneath them. Tony's breathing faltered, indicating that he had woken, but he said nothing and for that, Loki was grateful.

As he lay down his head down on the pillow, he felt Tony's arm snake around his waist, his hand coming to rest on the round curve of his stomach. Tony's body was pressing up against Loki's and for some peculiar reason, Loki felt his muscles relax and his mind quiet down.

"Goodnight, Loki," Tony whispered, his voice thick with sleep.

Loki said nothing in return.

He fell asleep minutes later.

-/-

There was no denying that Thor was watching him, that his blue eyes were studying him, and whenever Loki glanced up, Thor quickly focused on something else. It was ridiculous really. He had no talent for subtlety. For the longest time, Loki had tried to ignore him – which was a remarkable feat in his opinion – but now it was working on his nerves. Thor was centuries old, yet now and again, he liked to behave like a child apparently.

Snapping shut the book he'd been reading, Loki tossed it across Stark's living room, the edge of the book hitting Thor's forehead with exceptional precision. He cared nothing for Thor's pained 'aw' as he rubbed the sore spot.

"What was that for?" Thor asked, sounding hurt and possibly insulted that Loki had actually managed to throw a book at his head. He was still rubbing his forehead and Loki smiled triumphantly when he spotted the redness of his skin.

"Stop staring at me and tell me what's on your mind," He said sharply. It wasn't that he particularly cared about Thor's thoughts – it surprised him he had those in the first place – but perhaps it would end his irksome gaping.

"Nothing," Thor replied in his usual calm and collected voice. He dropped his hand and leaned back into the chair he sat upon.

"Nothing is on your mind?" He asked non-believing.

Loki crossed his legs beneath him and folded his arms before his chest. The child inside of him was twenty eight weeks old and his belly was growing every day. It became harder to maneuver around unnoticed which was a shame, but Loki was slowly growing used to it. In fact, he was starting to discover certain advantages to his bigness. For one, he just had to call for Tony and the mortal would bring him any food he requested, and how wonderful it was to balance a cup on his rounded stomach as he watched TV – one of the better inventions by these humans.

"You have always been a terrible liar."

Thor hummed as he stood and walked closer to Loki. He took a seat opposite of him on the couch, his elbows leaning on his knees. His gaze remained fixed on his little brother and Loki wasn't sure he liked the way Thor was looking at him right now. He just had that sort of thoughtful look on his face that told Loki that whatever came from his mouth next, he would dislike it.

"You've changed, brother," Thor said and Loki was instantly catapulted back a few months. It was the second time Thor said that to him and while the first time had had him burst into menace, this time Loki merely stared at his brother as he let the words crash into his mind. They were true after all, weren't it? If his new bodily state wasn't proof of that, then nothing was. "You seem happy," Thor continued, "And that makes me happy."

Biting down on his tongue, Loki tried his best to think of something to say, something that could possibly hurt Thor, that would have him leave, but he could think of nothing. So he smiled the kind of smile he knew Thor loathed. It wasn't a real one, but a defensive one, and nothing but mischief and caution and ice cold menace filled his gaze.

"How naïve you are," Loki spoke, "You still believe in happy endings, don't you? You still believe that the creature sitting in front of you is your brother and–"

"You are my brother," Thor interjected before Loki could say more.

Growling, Loki pushed himself up and stood. It was at times such as these that he wished he had more agility. He wanted to flee the room and for a moment he considered teleporting away, but magic still demanded a lot of his body and he didn't want to risk the health of the child. And would you look at that? Loki hated how he suddenly thought so protectively about the boy within him. Could it be he loved it? It was hard to fathom.

"I don't believe in fairy tales anymore," Loki said after a heavy silence, "I have believed one my entire life and look what that did to me." He glanced down at himself, not at his round belly, but at the color of his skin, the markings lacing it. "The illusion of a home, of a family …"

"It's only an illusion in your mind," Thor replied. He looked up at Loki who despised the sincerity in his brother's voice. "You have a home and you have a family. And now you are here and–"

"And what?" Loki snapped. Every word Thor spoke hurt because a part of him knew they were the truth – a truth he had been denying for so long. "I have a chance to start my own family? You think a son will have me abandon my old ways?"

"Perhaps."

Loki shook his head. "Then you truly are a fool," He said and just because he hated Thor for confronting him with distressing veracity, he lifted his hand and shot a stream of green flames into his direction. Thor threw himself over the couch in an attempt to protect himself – which was successful – but Loki never meant to harm his oaf of a brother.

He'd only sought distraction which he used to escape the room.

-/-

The roof had become his favorite place of Stark Tower. Not only did it provide a moment of solitude, but it gave Loki a wonderful view of the city that allowed him to imagine its destruction. He tried to remember how much time had passed since he'd tried to destroy New York with his army of Chitauri, but it seemed ages ago now. He couldn't tell whether it had been a year or five years. Time meant little to him. It did make him wonder if one day he would try and destroy it again, or was Thor right? Would his son make him change his ways? He somehow doubted it, but it was … plausible.

After all, the child hadn't been born yet and already Loki thought of his safety and protection first. Already he only wanted what was best for the child. It was only logical he would grow up here, close to Tony, and thus Loki couldn't risk burning down the city, no matter how much satisfaction he would get out of it.

Those thoughts frightened him as much as they soothed him.

A door slid open behind him, but Loki needn't turn around to know who was approaching. He could recognize Tony's footsteps anywhere.

When Tony came to stand next to him, he gazed out into the city like Loki – though he probably wasn't imagining its destruction – and stayed quiet. Loki wondered if he had spoken to Thor, if he would have the nerve to talk to him about it. Loki was close to finding out and a part of him was already boiling with anger. He was not in the mood to hear Tony defend his friend.

Only … Tony said nothing of Thor.

"We should start thinking of names."

Loki turned to look at Tony with wide, confused eyes, but before he could say anything, he felt Tony slip his hand into his and hold it tightly. The mortal shuddered at the coldness of his hand, but he didn't withdraw. He never did.

His brown eyes glistened with emotions Loki hadn't felt for a long time. Happiness. Excitement. Joy. Love. Loki wondered whether he felt love for him or for the child. Could it be he felt it for the both of them?

"Names?" He asked.

Tony nodded once. "Yes, names," He repeated. His thumb was rubbing soft circles into his blue skin. "And we must think it through because the boy will be stuck with it for the rest of his life. So no … Anthony, no matter how flattering it would be."

Loki snorted – the sound genuinely amused. Again he wondered why it was so easy for Tony to break through his defenses, but he had stopped trying to rebuild those walls once they had crumbled.

"I would never call the boy after you."

Tony's eyes widened with feigned insult. "What? We're going to call him after you?"

"Definitely not!" Loki found himself smiling and for the briefest moment he considered wiping that smile off of his face, considered pulling his hand out of Tony's, but for what? He was only fooling himself and Loki grew tired of it. Perhaps it was for the best if he learned to accept that he liked it here, that he enjoyed being in Tony's company, that he loved the child within him.

They were heavy thoughts.

"I'll have Pepper pick up some baby-name-books," Tony said. His free hand reached up to brush aside a few strands of Loki's raven hair and Loki didn't even pull away. "I bet he'll have your good looks. Hopefully he'll inherit my astonishing intellect."

Loki laughed. "You're awfully full of yourself."

"When aren't I?"

"I hope he has my magic," Loki said softly. He could already imagine himself teaching the boy spells, watching as green sparks of energy flitted from the tips of his little fingers. He couldn't help but be reminded of his time with Frigga. She had taught him everything he knew about magic and it was a legacy he intended to pass on to his son.

"And my talent for mechanics," Tony smiled.

Every muscle in Loki's body relaxed. There was no need for facades and he felt like he could let all the walls crumble around him. For once he didn't have to think about protecting himself, about keeping up a certain image, about keeping people at bay. No, he allowed Tony to get close to him while he knew it was a risk, but for now, it was a risk Loki was willing to take.

Tony lifted his hand and pressed a kiss to the back of it, his lips warm against his cooler skin. Loki could only stare at him and wonder why out of all the men and women worshipping the great Man of Iron, Tony Stark had chosen to kiss his hand. It was a question Loki didn't want answered just yet.

Things were good as they were.

He wanted to keep it that way.

-/-

Wetness was the first thing Loki experienced as he got out of bed that morning.

For a moment he paused to look down, finding a peculiarly red spot between his legs, but Loki's mind wasn't working properly because he couldn't process the information, couldn't understand what it meant.

A sharp pain shot through his lower abdomen and he gasped for air. His hands reached for his belly, clasping it as if he could touch the boy inside of him and hold him, soothe him.

He frantically looked back to the bed, knowing full well that he would find it empty since Tony was always gone by the time he woke, and the sight of more blood staining the sheets made him feel nauseous. He needed to think, but for some reason his thoughts were jumbled as panic moved around him like a claw pinning him down.

Finding help was his priority, that much he knew. He tried to step toward the door, but more pain shot through his lower stomach and Loki hissed as he tried his best to keep breathing. This was not good. This was not good.

Breathing was the key.

He had to stay calm.

His next step was easier, though the sharp pain remained. Slowly he managed to make it the door and into the hallway. He knew Tony was down in the basement, in his workshop, tinkering away on whatever he had invented lately, but Loki knew he would never make it all the way down. Black spots already dotted his vision and Loki once again reminded himself to keep breathing.

This was a kind of pain he had never before experienced. It wasn't nearly as bad as falling through a black hole, feeling like his limbs were torn from his torso again and again. It wasn't nearly as bad as The Other tormenting him with physical and psychological torture. But this… this was a pain more terrifying than he had ever conceived possible.

"Thor?" His voice sounded weak and fragile, and Loki just couldn't find the strength or energy to speak up. "Thor?" Why was his brother not around when he needed him? He had been watching him like a hawk, but now he was nowhere to be found. Typical! Loki cursed his brother's very existence for it.

And why wasn't Tony around? He always showed up at the most random of moments, but now he was gone and for once Loki wasn't afraid to admit that he needed him.

His heart was racing within his chest and he could hear his blood sing in his ears as panic overwhelmed him. He was bleeding and there was pain and he knew he was in trouble. His son was in trouble.

He took another step forward, toward the staircase, but the feeling of blood trickling down his legs made him stop. Movement wasn't helping.

He had to stay calm.

He had to stay calm.

"Jarvis?" He should have called for the artificial intelligence sooner. Why hadn't he thought of it sooner? His thoughts were scattered. He couldn't think properly, confusion and fright clouding his mind. He couldn't breathe properly either.

He blinked away the black spots that grew with every passing second.

"Yes, sir?"

"Get help," Loki breathed.

He didn't make it to the end of the hallway. One hand frantically pressed against the wall as he tried to steady himself, but his legs gave out from underneath him and he slid to the floor. More pain shot through him and Loki felt tears well up in his eyes. He didn't force them away and he didn't bother hiding them.

"Damn," He muttered when he understood he couldn't get up anymore. He tried to think of what could be wrong, tried to think of a spell that might fix all of this, but his magic wasn't useful at the moment. It was already coursing through his veins, doing its best to keep him awake. "Damn it. Jarvis, tell them to hurry!"

"Yes, sir. I have also alerted SHIELD medical base. An ambulance will be here in three minutes."

"Good," Loki said. He licked his lips and forced himself to take in deep breaths. He had to stay calm because panic would only lead to more pain. He imagined that his son's heartbeat was much too fast, too, and he was still so small, so fragile.

Footsteps sounded in the distance – or perhaps not too distant because Thor appeared at the top of the stairs a second later, nothing but worry lacing his features as he spotted Loki sitting against the wall, a pool of blood surrounding him.

Loki tried to focus on his brother, tried to understand the emotions flitting across his face, tried to hear what he was saying as he ran toward him, but he still sounded so far away. His magic was failing, too.

"Brother?" Thor knelt down before him, one hand cupping the back of Loki's neck, his thumb rubbing comforting circles into the side of neck – at least, Loki thought they were meant to be comforting. They did very little to soothe him.

He couldn't breathe properly and he momentarily wondered if Thor could hear his heart pounding within him for it was beating so ferociously. "I don't …" The black spots of his vision grew. "… know … what is wrong, Thor."

"It'll be okay, brother," Thor assured him. He was trying to make him feel better, but he failed. His blue eyes lowered to take in the blood staining Loki's clothes and the ground beneath them. He had no clue what to do and Loki didn't blame him.

He didn't know what to do either.

That scared him most of all.

Almost out of nowhere, Tony's face entered his vision. Loki squeezed his eyes shut for a second, wondering if Tony would still be there when he opened them again. He was and he could feel Tony's hands coming to rest to the sides of his face while Thor's touch disappeared. Tony touched him so gently, like he was afraid he would shatter into a thousand pieces.

Perhaps he would.

"Loki, you have to breathe," Tony said softly.

Breathe? Oh. Only now did Loki realize that he had been holding his breath since Tony had appeared. He parted his lips and tried to suck in a deep breath, but it was impossible. His body no longer seemed to listen to his mind. He shifted and more pain shot through his lower abdomen. He sucked in a shuddering breath, his hands reaching up to grab Tony's wrists, to hold onto him.

And then Tony smiled at him and Loki didn't understand how Tony could even manage to make his eyes fill with such warmth and compassion.

"Okay, you're doing great, Loki," Tony told him. Oh, he was trying to calm him and comfort him. "Take in deep breaths. You have to calm down."

The black spots grew bigger and while Loki tried his best to keep focused on Tony, to take in his worry-filled eyes, he found that darkness was pulling him under. But he fought and he wanted to tell Tony that he was fighting with all the strength he still had left, but his voice seemed lost.

"Okay, not that calm," Tony said, his voice faltering. His grip on Loki's face tightened and he no longer bothered to hide his fear, his panic. "Loki, stay with me. You have to–"

Darkness consumed him.

TBC ...