Hey guys, I have to tell y'all that Lizzie's gone again, and I super swore not to write an of this story unless we were together. But in one day we did manage to write 5 or 6 chapters ( forget which one) So I'll update every couple of days. Another thing you should know (Lizzie would probably want you to know this) Is that while this was being written at 4 in the morning, we were watching the Spice Girls Movie (I like the drill instructor, seriously, if he was a real person, Ethan'd better move over)
And sadly we do not own 'The Sawyer Song' no matter how much we love it. It belongs to geniuses, definitely not us.
And since I forgot last time…

Disclaimer: Neither Lizzie nor I own any piece of Lost in any shape, form, color, piece, or time. We're just two very obsessed best friends, who like to annoy the shit outta people.

Abby and Lizzie's Mighty Magical Mystical Marvelous Alliteration of a Lost Epic Quest

Chapter 2

I Spy French Woman

"I can't believe you volunteered us to go on another friggin' walk," Lizzie mumbled as she dragged her feet through the dirt.

"Jack said they needed extra people," Abby explained.

"Jack can suck my ass, I want to go lie down," she muttered.

"You girls are fallin' behind," Sawyer yelled with a smirk knowing he was going to get a response that would likely tick off Kate.

"You can suck my fallin' behind!" Lizzie yelled.

"Speaking of fallin' behind, pull up your pants, plumber!" Abby screamed.

"Please, can't we just walk in silence," Sayid pleaded, "We should be close to receiving the transmission and silence would help a lot."

"More then a lot," Kate muttered.

"Alright Guy," Lizzie agreed, "But only because we like you."

Five seconds later the group reached the bottom of the giant mountain that they had to climb.

"OH MY GOD!" Lizzie screamed seeing the size of the climb.

"Just calm down," Abby suggested.

"I'm not going to freaking 'calm down', I have to climb Mount freaking Everest!" she yelled.

"God, shut up!" Shannon finally snapped.

"Don't you start on me Princess, I'll…." Lizzie stopped short when Boone approached Shannon, "Hello, since when have you been on this trip to hell?"

"Umm, since the beginning," he stated.

"Oh really, why don't you walk back here with me?" Lizzie questioned.

"Yeah, we're under our eyebrows quota," Abby added.

"Knock knock," Lizzie declared.

"Who's there?" Abby asked.

"Knock knock!"

"Who's there?"

"Knock knock!"

"Who's there?"

"Knock knock?"

"Oh my God, shut up!" Shannon screeched.

"Who's there?"

"Knock knock!"

"Who's there?"

"Knock knock!"

"Be quiet!" Kate demanded in a low, serious voice.

"Who's there?"

"Knock knock?"

"Who's there?"

"Knock knock?"

"SHUT UP!" Sawyer yelled as he swung around angrily, "I can't take it anymore, you two are too damn annoying!"

"I can't help it!" Lizzie argued, "Do you know how much I've walked in the last day? Like infinity steps!"

"Girls, just please play another game," Sayid asked politely.

"Okay," they both agreed.

"I spy with my little eye," Lizzie began, "Something that is green!"

"The trees?" Abby asked quickly.

"Yep!"

"I spy with my little eye, something that is brown," Abby stated.

"The trees?" Lizzie questioned.

"You got it!" Abby replied happily.

"Oh God," Kate muttered.

"I spy with my little eye, something that is green!"

"The trees?

"Yep!"

"I spy with my little eye, something that is brown!"

"The trees?"

"Yep!"

"I spy with my little eye, something that is green!"

"The trees?

"Yep!"

"I spy with my little eye, something that is brown!"

"The trees?"

"Yep!"

"I spy with my little eye…"

"Oh my God! Shut up okay? Just shut up!" Shannon yelled as her face turned red.

"Something bitchy," Lizzie stated glaring at Shannon.

"Shannon!" Abby answered happily throwing her arms up in the air.

"Yep!"

"I spy with my little eyes, something that is brown!" Abby announced

"THE TREES!" Kate yelled angrily, obviously having lost all patience for the girls.

"You can't play!" Abby yelled back then turned to her friend, "Lizzie?"

"She stole my answer," Lizzie complained.

"We're almost at a clearing, we'll stop there for food and rest," Sayid informed.

"Good, I'm hungry," Abby stated, "Do you have any snacks in there?" she asked pointing to Lizzie's purse.

"I think I have some soya beans," Lizzie mumbled as she rifled through her bag with one hand, "Here's a soya," she divulged pulling out a bean.

"And there's a soya," Abby pointed out, looking in the large bag as well.

"And another little soya," Lizzie added pulling out a pint-sized bean.

"Eww, fuzzy soya!" Abby screamed as a moldy bean came out of the bag.

"Funny soya," Lizzie giggled as an over-sized demented bean fell into Abby's hand.

"Soya," Abby yelled as she found another.

"Soya," Lizzie smiled with pride as she pulled out another bean.

"Lock?" they both said in unison as a locker lock plopped out of the bag.

"I've got something on the transceiver!" Sayid shouted happily and for the first time, Abby and Lizzie noticed the group huddled away from then listening to the message.

"It's in French," Kate stated.

"Yeah I got that," Abby rolled her eyes.

"The French are coming, I've never been so happy to hear the French!" Charlie said giddily.

"But the French are strong!" Lizzie commented, receiving awkward glances from the group, "What they are!"

"I never took French, can anyone speak it?" Kate questioned.

"She can!" Boone stated pushing Shannon over, "She spent time in Paris."

"Drinking, not studying!" she yelled.

"There's a surprise," Abby muttered, "My grandmother can speak better French then you, and she's Hungarian!"

"Can you speak French?" Boone questioned.

"Don't get her started," Lizzie replied.

"Gimme the damn walkie-talkie," Abby stated ripped the device away from Sayid, "She saying help me, I'm alone, it killed them all, something about a black rock, and asking who put the Bomp in the 'Bompshubomp'." Kate sent her a glare, in which she replied, "I know, serious."

"Maybe they got rescued?" Kate suggested.

"Then why is the message still playin'?" Sawyer asked.

"Yeah stupid," Lizzie muttered.

"So what killed them all?" Boone asked.

"It's the French!" Lizzie screamed.

"They're French!" Shannon screamed back.

"No, the French taught the people they wanted to keep alive to speak French because it's a strong language!" She argued.

"Why would they send out a distress call in a language their captures could understand?" Sayid questioned.

"It's the House on Haunted Hill thing," Abby declared, then turned to Kate, "And it's coming for you!"

"Guys," Charlie asked, "Where are we?"

"Seriously are you like hopped up on drugs or something because damn," Lizzie shouted.

On a final note, it should be mentioned that most of the things said and done in all chapters, have happened or occurred in reality, though not with Lost characters.
The 'knock knock', 'I spy' incidents have actually happened on class trips, when Shannon translated the message when Lizzie and I first viewed the pilot I said the comment about my grandma, and Lizzie said 'The French are strong' comment over breakfast that morning.
And Lizzie wanted to tell y'all that she's proud to have killed her husband and married Boone in our Sims neighborhood (I gave him big eyebrows). And that I'm having Ethan's baby! And I expect baby shower gifts!

Next Chapter- Abby and Lizzie play the name game, and someone DIES! Muh ha ha ha