6

Jagged

"Timothy, please sit down. The surgery will take as long as necessary; pacing yourself into exhaustion won't make the time go any faster."

"Faster...I should have been faster, too slow, always too slow, did I tell you?"

With a gentle guiding hand, Ducky led Tim to one of the hard plastic chairs. "You told us; now sit beside Abigail and we'll wait together."

Tim was quivering with tension, and Ducky didn't blame him, the last few hours were taking their toll on all of them, and they hadn't witnessed the shooting, or its bloody aftermath. He'd rushed here with Abby as soon as Gibbs called them, by the time they got here Tony was in the ER and Tim was pacing in the waiting area, already exhausted from their punishing work schedule he'd had to try and keep his friend alive until medical help arrived, and that wasn't the last hammer blow to fall.

The shooter had been identified as Blake Martin, a man who had already tortured and killed two men, one of them a Navy Lieutenant; he'd also tried to wheedle his way into NCIS by accusing Tim of hacking the Pentagon. When he was charged and sent to prison he'd vowed to see his accusers 'pay', no one had paid him any mind because he'd been sentenced to life without possibility of parole, but he'd escaped from the supposedly High Security Penitentiary where he was being held, he was still out there, at least until Gibbs got to him. Ducky was doing his best to keep Tim calm, but it was a near impossible task. His best friend having emergency surgery, his own life in danger, the guilt that inevitably came from knowing Tony was suffering when he wasn't the intended target, small wonder Tim was in a highly agitated state.

Tim almost collapsed into the chair, he was tired, but he couldn't rest, not until he knew Tony was going to be okay. He felt an arm link through his and heard her whisper. "Hold on to me Timmy, we'll get through this together."

"It's my fault; he was after me, and Tony...he's faster than me, better than me, always better...I...when I saw Martin, I didn't move, he fired and Tony...he can't die Abby. How can I go on if I have his death on my conscience?"

"He won't. Tim, look at me." Reluctantly Tim turned to look into Abby's red-rimmed eyes. "I'm scared, we all are, but we have to stay positive. Ducky says Tony has the best doctors around, and you did all the right things, got help, kept pressure on the wound."

"But it didn't stop bleeding, and I pressed hard Abs, honest I did, even when I thought maybe I was hurting him, I pressed hard, but the blood..."

"Timothy, you did curtail the bleeding, I know you're in shock and you're confused, but you mustn't go on thinking you did nothing to help. In some cases it's not possible to stem the flow completely, just believe me when I tell you your actions gave Tony precious minutes he wouldn't have had without you; minutes that make all the difference in trauma cases."

Tim looked down at his hands, they were clean now; he'd hurried to the men's room to wash them right after he'd seen Abby's face when she saw the blood...Tony's blood. He'd scrubbed and scrubbed until his hands felt raw. He was sure the blood was gone, but he was also sure he could detect the harsh metallic smell, and feel the warm stickiness..."Did Gibbs say when he'd be here, Tony will want him here when he wakes up."

Tim glanced toward the door, there was no one there but the guard Director Vance had insisted on; as long as Blake Martin was at large Tim was in danger and the Director didn't want another man down. "Jethro is looking for Martin, do you remember?"

"Oh...oh yeah, Ducky, how did he get out, he was supposed to be in High Security?"

Ducky sighed; it wasn't the first time Tim had asked that question since he'd met up with him in the waiting room, and he rather suspected it wouldn't be the last. "He escaped, four days ago, the prison should have informed you, and the agency, but..."

"We had a failure to communicate...Cool Hand Luke, Tony loves that movie, when he's better I'll watch it with him, when he..." Tim couldn't go on, his words stuck in his throat; it was too early to be thinking about life after tonight...this morning. He'd lost track of time, kept forgetting where he was, and for a blissful moment or two, why he was here. Then it all flooded back, the terrifying ride from his apartment to the hospital, watching the EMTs keeping his friend alive, the life-saving fluids, the oxygen, the screaming sirens, and all the while his own voice begging Tony not to die, to hold on, to fight, to live. He'd made it to the hospital and after a brief sojourn in the Emergency Room he'd been wheeled into surgery, and he'd been there...Tim checked the clock, three hours nineteen minutes. "Too long, why is it taking so long?"

Abby held him tighter, she was scared for Tony, but seeing Tim like this was breaking her heart. "There's no way of knowing how bad the internal injuries are, that's what you said, right Ducky? But he's in great hands Tim, and the longer it takes the stronger he'll be when it's all over." She leaned against his chest so he wouldn't be able to see the doubt in her eyes, how much longer could Tony hold out?

"I wish it was over...wish it had never happened, I should have recognised Martin, I saw him, before the apartment, I saw him and I didn't do anything. If only I'd said something."

"Now young man, you really must stop this self flagellation. The whole team has been under almost unendurable pressure of late, you told Gibbs you thought you caught a glimpse of someone at a crime scene, it would have been a miracle had you been able to recognise him in the circumstances."

"Did you see the way Gibbs looked at me? He knew; it should have been me who took the bullet, not Tony. The team can do without me any day, but Tony..."

"We can't do without you Tim, we belong together, and we'll all be together again soon, you'll see."

The door opened and Tim was on his feet immediately, was this news from the OR at last? "Boss...we...there's no news."

"I know, checked in at the nurses' station on the way in. You should sit before you fall, Tim, we got him, Martin's never going to hurt anyone again."

"Dead?"

Gibbs nodded and Tim gave a brief smile. "Good, he didn't deserve to live after what he did. I...you should have coffee, I can get coffee..."

"You can sit, coffee can wait. Sit McGee!" Gibbs took his place beside Tim and settled in to wait, he wanted news as much as any of them, but long years in the military and law enforcement had taught him that these things couldn't be rushed, when the doctors were done they'd hear.

"Jethro; do we know why we weren't informed about Martin's escape?"

"Usual...someone told someone and they didn't pass on the message, Vance is going to have words with the prison Governor later today. Seems like Martin would tell anyone who'd listen that some NCIS hacker was the reason he was in prison, not the two men he killed, or the woman he almost got to."

"Maxine...I'd almost forgotten Blake Martin, how can you forget?" Tim was staring at the door, willing it to open, for a member of the medical team to come in with a smile on their face.

"We put a lot of scum bags away Tim, not always easy to remember them all. Martin did some favours for the right people in prison, they got him out and he decided to use his freedom to come looking for you."

"Found me, would have killed me too if Tony...I wish he hadn't come home with me Boss, he'd be okay if he'd just gone to his own apartment. Bet Tony wishes it too."

The head slap was gentle, but it had the desired effect. Tim took his eyes off the door and stared at Gibbs. "Why do you think Tony went home with you? Because he wanted to be sure you were safe, we're a team Tim, it's what we do for each other, what you did for him when The Chameleon was after him."

Tim's mouth almost dropped open. "You can't compare...I...it was a scratch, nothing like this..."

"Exactly like this Tim, the consequences may be different, but you stood between Tony and a killer, and he did the same for you."

"He said...Tony said..." Tim stood up and resumed his nervous pacing again, sitting still was almost painful, he had to keep moving, he could stop when he saw Tony. Ducky started to rise; ready to halt the relentless pacing, but Gibbs shook his head. "Leave him Duck, can't see him keeping this up much longer, he's almost out on his feet."

"As you must be too, there has been precious little rest for all of you for too long."

"Vance has given us all the time we need. He wanted Hill's team to go after the bastard; couldn't let that happen...Martin gave me exactly what I wanted Duck, he didn't back down, raised his gun. Can't pretend I'm sorry, he planned to kill one of my people, left another bleeding out."

"Martin got what he deserved Jethro."

"I know, just wish I could tell Tony."

"You will, we all have to be here for him, and for Timothy. He's eaten up with guilt."

"He didn't do anything wrong! Blake Martin's warped, twisted version of reality sent him out on some kind of revenge mission; it was nothing to do with Tim."

"A fact of which he will be fully aware when he is more like himself. The poor lad's living on a knife's edge at the moment waiting to hear; perhaps I should go and check again?"

"No need Duck, looks like we're going to get news."

Tim's pacing stopped the instant the door opened, his breathing became shallow, he felt hot; he had so wanted to get news, but now, seeing the grim faced doctor coming through the door, he suddenly wanted to change his mind, he didn't want to know, not right now, later...maybe later the doctor would be smiling...

TBC