April 2010
Kate pulled the mail from the letter box, sorting through it and tossing the junk into the trash can before slamming the little door shut and twisting her key in the lock to close it, her hands shaking as adrenaline flooded her system.
Two envelopes.
Two return addresses.
She stared at them, frozen now that this moment was finally here, unable to move a muscle. What if something had gone wrong? What if one - or both - of them was something else?
The slam of the building's door behind her startled her out of her trance, and she whirled around to watch her neighbors rush up the stairs, glancing once more at the paperwork in her hands before following them up, one foot after another until she made it back to her own apartment.
"Hey. Everything okay?" Rick called as she stood in her doorway, her gaze glued to the letters in her hand.
"Um. Yes?"
"Mommy!" Ramona screeched. Kate she forced herself to relax, closing the door behind her. Taking cautious steps into the kitchen, she placed the letters on the table.
"Kate?"
"Mommy, watch me!" Ramona demanded, and she huffed out a laugh, turning to watch her daughter jump, twisting in what she could only suppose was a dance move? Or… well. She had no idea. "I'm spinning!"
"You sure are," she agreed, raising her eyebrows at Rick, and letting her daughter cuddle into her once Ramona had spun her way across the room.
"Are you okay?" Rick asked again, and she nodded, biting down on her lip.
"Yeah. I, uh- got mail." She tilted her head, indicating to the envelopes on the table.
"And…?"
"And… I haven't opened them yet."
"What…?" Rick made a face, confusion spreading across his features. "What are you waiting for?"
She lifted a shoulder in response, a half shrug. "I don't know? What if…"
"It's only going to be good news," he said. "Go on. Sit down. I'll make the coffee. Unless you want to open them by yourself?"
She shook her head taking a seat at the table. Ramona clambered into her lap as Rick situated himself at the machine, making the coffee and steaming the milk. He carried three mugs to the table - coffee for himself and Kate, the third mostly froth and a sprinkling of chocolate for Ramona - and sat down next to her.
"Go on," he urged. "Open them."
Kate reached around Ramona to pull the first one toward her. This one she'd been expecting since last week; her lawyer had called to let her know everything was complete. She slid a fingernail under the edge, lifting the flap and pulling the paperwork out, a smile spilling onto her lips as she read the words.
Divorce Finalized.
Rick grinned at her, and she closed her eyes, nodding.
She was officially a free woman.
"Now the other one," Rick said and she made a face at him.
"Stop rushing me," she complained, taking a sip of her coffee and staring at the second letter. The last two months had been a whirlwind of exams and testing and medicals as she'd rushed headlong into her application. This was it. The moment of truth.
"What's that?" Ramona chirped, finishing her own drink and fixing her attention on the papers in front of them.
"Okay," Kate said. "Let's see, shall we?"
She opened the second envelope, pulling the letter out, its words swimming before her eyes.
Congratulations.
Katherine Houghton Beckett.
NYPD.
Accepted.
Recruit Officer in the Police Academy.
She pushed the letter toward Rick, pressing a kiss against Ramona's hair and watching as a grin spread across his face.
"Kate!" he exclaimed, his eyes shining, and she grinned back at him.
"I know." She bit her lip, pride surging through her. "I have to tell my dad now."
"What, Mommy?" Ramona asked again, and she beamed at her daughter.
"We're celebrating, that's what!" Rick declared, and Kate laughed.
"Mommy's going to be a Police Officer," she whispered to Ramona, and Rick let out a whoop of joy.
Ramona looked from Kate to Rick and back again, confusion on her little face. "Mommy, police?"
"Uh-huh." Kate nodded, as Rick rushed to explain.
"Mommy's going to the Police Academy to learn how to catch the bad guys!"
"Are you sure you don't want me to come with you?" Rick asked, and she shook her head.
"No, I have to do this by myself."
He dropped his gaze for a second, unconvinced, before meeting her eyes again. She'd been quiet the whole way over here, chewing on her fingernails and staring out the cab window while Ramona chattered on. "Because Alexis is here, and my mother, and I'm sure they'd be fine with Ramona if you need me-"
"Yeah, we'd be fine," Alexis agreed, crowding in on them, her eyes wide and sincere. "Ramona and I will be fine, won't we?"
Ramona nodded, beaming at his daughter. "Alexis, we watch movies?"
"Sure we can," Alexis agreed. "How about The Lion King."
"Lion King!" Ramona cheered, grabbing Alexis' hand and dragging her toward his office without a second glance back at Kate.
"Bye, Sweetie," Kate called, rolling her eyes at her daughter's back. "Be good for Alexis."
"See!" Rick tried again. "They don't even need me. I can come with you, help you explain everything."
She shrugged, her gaze uneasy as she leaned back against the closed front door, and he swallowed at the sight of her exposed neck as she tilted her head up, focusing on the ceiling.
"No," she said at last. "No. When I was nineteen and told my dad I wanted to be a cop… it wasn't pretty. I just… I don't want you to see that, okay? I think… I think I'm going to hurt him." She broke off, and he sighed as he saw the unshed tears welling in her eyes. His heart ached for her, and, stepping forward, he brushed his thumb across her jaw, pressing his lips to hers.
"Thank you. I know you want to help, be there for me." She smiled, standing up straighter, her mouth meeting his again as her tongue sought entrance, teasing before she pulled away from him, and he smothered the moan that was begging for release. "You and me, we'll celebrate this weekend, okay? But first, I'm going to go tell my dad everything."
"Hey, Katie."
Jim stood up as she walked into the diner, giving her a warm hug before sitting back down.
"Hey." She slid into the seat opposite him, unsure of just what to say now she was here. Around them, the drone of the lunchtime crowd bustled, and she watched as waitresses hurried between tables, carrying food and clearing plates. Her own stomach rumbled, but her hands shook with nerves.
The idea of eating was nauseating.
"So what have you been up to?" her dad asked. "You said you had some news."
"Uh... yeah."
Jim's face fell, the smile replaced by a cautious frown. "Not good news?"
"Hmmm... Let's get coffee." She caught the waitress' eye and waved the woman over. "Two coffees, please."
Jim stared at her expectantly, and Kate threw a troubled glance back at the door, wishing she could skip through this, walk out of the diner, the conversation done. How was she going to explain everything to her dad? Being accepted to the Academy was one thing, but how did she tell a newly sober man that his wife's murder was, after so many years, once again officially unsolved.
"And where's Ramona?"
Kate laughed at the way her father's eyes lit up at the mention of his granddaughter. This time last year she'd been hesitant about letting Jim even be around Ramona. Last summer had changed everything for them. "She's with Rick, actually," Kate said. "He and Alexis are watching a movie with her at the loft."
"You did good," Jim replied, grinning. "I bet Ramona just loves Alexis."
Her eyes danced in memory, a smile tugging on her lips. Her father had been quite taken, not just with Rick, but with his daughter when they'd joined him upstate at Christmas.
"Yeah. She does." Kate leaned back in the booth. She would start with the good news, break this up into manageable pieces. "So Rick and I are going to the Hamptons tomorrow, for the weekend. He has a place there."
"Oh yeah?" Jim smiled. "Things are getting serious between the two of you, huh? So what brought the trip on? He came up to the cabin and now he wants to show you his place?"
"Yeah. I guess... yeah." Kate looked down, repressing her grin. There was no guessing about it. Things were getting serious; things had been getting serious since the day she'd met him if she was going to be completely honest with herself.
The smile spilled onto her face, and she watched her father's expression light up in kind.
Sitting at her kitchen table this morning and staring down at the two letters - at the words that told her she'd made it - had lifted a weight from her that she hadn't even known she was carrying.
The fear of remaining adrift, purposeless. The fear of sinking, not swimming. The fear of never bringing this to rest, of injustice prevailing. It was gone and she had a fighting chance now, to solve her mother's murder. For her mom, for her dad. And for herself.
"Yeah," she said, her words deliberately low as she fought to keep her voice even. "We're getting serious... and I have two weeks free before I... start."
"Start?"
"Uh-huh." Kate twisted her fingers together in a tight knot. "Well, you know, my temp job ended and I didn't try and get the contract renewed, because I decided to stop practicing law."
Her dad angled his head, eyes never leaving hers.
"I applied for something new... and, well, remember when Mom first died... and I had it in my head that I wanted to be a cop? I wanted a job that meant something?"
Jim sucked a loud breath in, dropping his gaze and studying the table before him. Their waitress returned, placing two coffees in front of them. "Yeah." He cleared his throat. "About that. I talked you out of it. I know I did. And for what it's worth now, I'm sorry. You… I shouldn't have stopped you."
"You are?" Kate jerked her head up, staring at Jim in surprise. "Really?"
"Really. I mean, I know you're a great lawyer, but..." He trailed off. "Just seems like you could have been a great cop, too."
Kate raised her eyebrows, bringing her thumb to her mouth and gnawing on the nail to buy herself a second more time. "That's kind of what I wanted to talk to you about."
"Talking you out of becoming a cop?"
"You didn't talk me out of becoming a cop. Not really. You know that right?"
"I-"
"I let you talk me out of it. Because when they caught the guy..." Her cheeks warmed and she dropped her eyes in shame. If she had fought for this back then it would probably already be over.
"Hey..." Jim smiled, patting Kate's hand. "It's okay. It's over now."
She indicated no, pressing her lips together as her fingers gripped his. "Not exactly."
"What aren't you telling me?"
She shrugged, squaring her shoulders. Time to do this. "While I've been seeing Rick-" At that, Jim's mouth curved up into a knowing smile. "He's been... consulting. With the NYPD."
"And writing a book about you?" Jim smirked.
Kate rolled her eyes and continued. "Yeah. And that. But... I've been to a couple of scenes with him, and the detectives he works with. And... you know what? I remembered. How much I wanted to join the NYPD."
Jim grinned, understanding flooding his features, and he leaned his head against the back of the booth. "And you've decided it's not too late."
"Yeah. I have. I, uh... I applied. And I've... been accepted. I start at the Police Academy for a six month training program, in two weeks."
"Wow." Jim nodded, his eyes gleaming. "I'm... I'm proud of you, Katie. I... Really am. And she would be too."
Kate blinked. "Really? You're okay with this? I thought you would try to talk me out of it."
"No. I tried that. Ten years ago. And it didn't work. If you want this... I'm not gonna lie and say the idea of you being out there doesn't scare me, but I'm proud of you."
"Thank you." Kate's head dipped for a moment, her teeth capturing her lower lip as she inhaled, readying herself to divulge the rest of it. "Dad?"
"Yeah?"
"There's something else. The guy who confessed to mom's murder? He was blackmailed. He didn't do it. Mom's case has been reopened."
A/N: Thank you everyone, for your support last chapter! x