A/N – This isn't so much romantic. It was just something that popped into my head and I had to write it down. I've had this sitting in my notebook for almost 2 weeks and I decided to type it up and post it. I hope you like it.

Suicidal or not?

When I didn't find him in his room, or anywhere else in the house, my first thought was to panic. But then after taking a deep breath I realised there was only one place he could have gone; this conclusion didn't make me feel any better. After all, he might do something he can't undo. Something that would break my heart and take away his future.

With this in mind, I hurried to get ready, I pulled on some clothes and splashed some water on my face, having brushed my teeth before I started looking for him, and pulled on my jacket with my keys in the pocket. There was no need for a note – it was 7:00 am on a Saturday so my parents wouldn't be waking up for another 2 to 3 hours – so I walked down the stairs and opened the door without making a noise. Once outside I got into my car and drove off heading south.

Towards the south lay a forest that hid the edge of a cliff. I had been there before with him. It's our special place; the place where we go when we need to unwind. The place we come when everything becomes too much; the place we could talk with no distractions and could just let everything off our chests. The place I both hated and loved; it brings up all the pain I try to avoid but it does bring me closer to him and it helps to clear my head so when we're done I always feel lighter as if as huge burden had been lifted off my shoulders. The reason I knew he would come here was because it had been exactly a year since she died and he first shot to kill. He needed someplace to be alone and think about what happened and this is always where he came for that.

I parked outside the trail we usually use and got out of the car. I tripped over my feet in my haste to reach him and make sure he didn't do something that would most definitely break me. I walked through the narrow trail, pushing branches out of my face, wondering off the path towards the clearing we christened misfits heaven. The name came about when I made a comment about us being a couple of misfits and this was our heaven. The name just stuck after while and we both liked it.

Walking into the clearing I saw him sat there on the edge of the cliff with his his feet dangling off.

"Oh Alex, what are you doing?" There really was no point in asking him that since we both knew exactly what he was doing. Seeing no point in answering the question he instead said,

"I won't fall." The unspoken question of 'Will you jump?' hung in the air between us. Trying hard not to think about that,, I sat down next to him in an offer of support. In a silent show of weakness, he wrapped his arms around my waist and laid his head in the crook of my neck. After one heart-breaking moment I felt tears sliding down my neck and I heard him murmur "I miss her so much." Gently wrapping my arms around his shoulders, I lay my head on top of his, showing him I was still here and I didn't plan on leaving anytime soon. I could feel and taste the tears sliding down my face; it was evident that we both missed Jack.

After a few minutes maybe hours, days or years, I really don't know because it felt like forever we sat there grieving. The tears had finally stopped so I slowly untangled myself from Alex and stood up.

"Come on Alex, let's get home we don't want to worry my parents."

"Ed and Liz are probably still asleep, Sabina," He huffed a laugh and I couldn't do anything but smile. It was good to know that even on a day like this he could still find something to laugh about. We both walked towards the trail and I gestured for him to follow while I led him to the car.

Halfway to our destination, his face suddenly turned serious and he looked at me and said, "I wasn't going to jump, you know." I couldn't answer him when I realised that I really don't know for sure what he would have done but I am glad that he answered the question that had been on my mind since I found him sitting on the edge. Nevertheless, he seemed to read my unspoken answer on my face and he smiled; a sad, desperate, little smile that said everything and nothing at the same time. I replied with an almost identical smile that managed to convey all of my emotions to him. We both knew that if he had jumped I would have jumped right after him because I loved him too much to be able to let him go. This made me wonder if we could ever be the same carefree teenagers we used to be. The answer was no.

The End

Constructive Criticism please

HPxAR