The hands on Sanji's hips tightened their firm grip. The blond threw his head back, feeling tickling warmth in his muscles as he moved faster. Spreading his fingers on the tan chest, he looked down at Zoro's face. That face, full of desire and heat, never failed to arouse him incredibly. Sanji rode smoothly, watching as the swordsman's brows knitted in pleasure, eyes closed, lips parted. Their breaths became sharper when Zoro started to move upwards, meeting the blond's thrusts from below. His cock was sliding inside Sanji so overwhelmingly good, bringing him closer and closer to the point where his head would spin, everything in the world forgotten. Everything but Zoro.
"All good?" the green haired man smirked, but that cocky grin was instantly erased and replaced by a hanging jaw as Sanji brought himself down on the shaft.
Lowering himself to the man's face, Sanji brushed his lips over his sweated neck, rolling his hips in a slower rhythm.
"Fucking great," Sanji whispered right into his ear, his tongue lingering on the earlobe.
A low groan escaping his throat, Zoro slid his hand down to where their bodies met. He gripped the blond's length in a fist, circling the head with his thumb. Sanji wasn't able to suppress a moan that his lungs let out.
"And now?" Zoro husked, dark eyes gazing into Sanji's.
"Shut up and keep going." He gripped Zoro's arm, feeling blissful pressure in his crotch.
Wrapping his free arm around the blond's waist, the swordsman moved his lower body rapaciously, slamming his cock hard and deep into Sanji. The blond gripped Zoro tighter, his hips jerking to meet the man's hand, which was stroking him so fast and so good. The pressure inside his cock became unbearable for him to handle when Zoro squeezed right below the head, his hand pumping in a perfect rhythm that he knew Sanji enjoyed the most.
His thighs trembling, the blond thrust his hips down strongly to get Zoro's whole length in. Sanji noticed Zoro's face twitching, his breaths mixing with moans, sharpening as if he was right there.
A final pound, a strong pump of the hand, and they came one after another, roaring and cursing in ecstatic agony. Sanji loosened his fingers on Zoro's arm, and Zoro freed the blond's softening cock from his hold. But he never removed his arm from the blond's waist.
"Sanji," he murmured as his breath steadied.
"Hm," the cook nuzzled into Zoro's neck, exhausted.
"I love you."
Sanji stirred under the blanket, groaning slightly, slowly opening his eyes. His muscles instantly reminded him about the previous night, as well as the surroundings. Tasteless, bright orange walls and a yellow couch he was lying on definitely didn't belong to his apartment. Well, he didn't belong to any apartment anymore.
Rubbing his swollen eyes, Sanji lifted himself on one elbow. He stared into space for several moments, blinking blankly and trying to remember the dream he'd been watching just before waking up.
It was a pleasant dream, but something about it was making the cook's chest tight even if he couldn't properly recall what it was about. Scratching the back of his head, he stood up and headed to the bathroom.
Opening the tap, he realized he'd left his toothbrush there. God damn it, his mouth tasted like shit and definitely was smelling even worse. On top of that, an enormous thirst hit him hard and forced him to flee to the kitchen and dry a half of a carafe. Greedy gulps made his throat turn into lump, but the need for water was winning against the uncomfortable sensation.
"Good morning," Usopp yawned from the doorway.
Swallowing a mouthful of water, Sanji nodded. His morning was by all means not good, but it had nothing to do with Usopp after all.
"Do you have an unused toothbrush?" Sanji asked the sleepy guy, wiping his mouth with a heel of his hand.
"Yeah, lucky you," Usopp warmed up his neck with a light crump. "Grab it from the medicine drawer, it's packed."
"Thanks," the blond forced a small smile, passing by the doorway.
Sanji felt a little better after the refreshing procedure, even though his muscles were still numb, his head throbbed, and his eyes hurt as if he had a dozen of needles in his eyeballs.
He hadn't slept much after his sudden arrival to Usopp. A couple of hours went on venting his rage and explaining what happened. The long-nosed guy listened quietly with a scowl on his face that deepened as Sanji's story unfolded. He didn't say anything to reassure Sanji, he was just lending him a comforting shoulder that the cook indeed needed a lot.
The blond felt embarrassed that he'd disturbed his friend in a middle of a night and threw all his personal problems to his face out of the blue. Not knowing a better way to apologize and to express gratitude, Sanji came to a conclusion that he could at least make breakfast. Savory, flavorsome, delicious breakfast. Usopp would be happy for sure.
Returning to the kitchen, Sanji found his friend deep in his notes. Usopp was a motor mechanic, and he was rarely seen not drafting or scribbling in his notepad, his tongue sticking out, face concentrated. So, Sanji ran into that tense Usopp who was far away from the kitchen or anything around for that matter.
Sanji was always welcomed as a cook in his every friend's kitchen, so he didn't bother to distract the long-nosed guy from his business. Usopp's fridge was a fridge of a single man – Sanji barely found something edible among cans of beer. Taking out a couple of eggs, bacon and a tomato, the cook got started on his work.
Washing, slicing, stirring – preparing meals somehow felt soothing. Knocking the eggs from their shells into the bowl, he scratched his chin and peeked into the refrigerator again. Some milk remained there, and fortunately, it hadn't even soured and was right enough. He poured the milk into the bowl and then took stripes of bacon. The pan he had set was already hot enough, and when the bacon touched the oiled surface, it sizzled slightly, like when tobacco sizzles as you're inhaling the first morning drag.
Sanji flinched, his eyebrows rising. Damn that hangover, he'd almost forgotten what would reanimate him. A pack he'd put into a pocket of the sweatpants that Usopp had given him crumpled a bit, but the cigarettes were fine. Placing one stick between his lips and lighting it up, Sanji enjoyed a lungful of bitter smoke.
Finishing the cigarette, he sighed with relief. The bacon was of a nice brown color when he upturned it. Sanji knocked another egg into the pan, then shook the mass for the omelet in the bowl, sliced tomato into tiny pieces and poured the ingredients onto the side of the pan. Sunny side up for himself, tomato omelet for Zo–
Holy shit.
"Usopp." His eyebrow twitched as he swallowed nervously. "Do you mind tomato omelet?"
"No, why would I?" the long-nosed guy wondered, still not raising his eyes from the sketch. "Everything you cook is great, Sanji."
"Thanks," the blond let out a small sigh.
Probably, his hands were just moving automatically. Doing the same task almost every morning would form quite a habit after all. Having eggs in front of him, of course Sanji would focus on the task of doing one sunny side up and one tomato omelet. Because Zoro liked tomato omelet, and Sanji was living with him for a pretty long time.
Was he really so used to all the habits he gained while being together with that moss-head? Would he be able to get rid of them, throw them away like a thing he'd get bored of and didn't need anymore? Like he threw Zoro away from his life the previous night?
A disturbing feeling crept into his chest, tightening it the same way it did when he'd woken up today. When he had that dream... Now he was unfortunate to recollect it – so unfortunate that even the tiniest details painted the whole image in his head. Zoro's face, his eyes looking at Sanji with some sort of weird admiration, his hands that were so palpable despite it was just a dream. He would never feel Zoro's skin again, never inhale the scent of his sweat, touch his lips, see that small smile...
Sanji was inwardly convincing himself that the tickling in his eyes was just an accidental spark or not enough evaporated smoke or fucking anything but not that what suddenly possessed his mind so strongly, making his heart ache as if its flesh was tearing apart, slowly, ripping into small pieces, bit by bit.
"Sanji?" Usopp shook his shoulder. "Are you okay?"
The blond blinked, gripping his fork. He didn't notice when he'd finished preparing the meal and set the plates onto the table. Neither did he notice when Usopp had managed to wipe his plate clean. His own one, however, was untouched.
"Yes, I'm okay," he cleared his throat and sent a piece of egg into his mouth. Somehow it didn't have any taste.
"Tell me if something is wrong," Usopp glanced at him worriedly.
Chewing seemed like a routine he didn't enjoy at all. Swallowing was difficult, his mouth and throat were dry and numb.
"Coffee or tea?" Usopp asked from the counter. Again, Sanji didn't notice when the guy had stood up from the table.
"Coffee, please," the blond muttered, peering into his filled plate.
It was still filled when the long-nosed guy placed two cups of black coffee on the table.
"Usopp," Sanji turned to him, yet trying not to look straight into his eyes. "Do you want my portion?" He moved his plate to the side.
Brow raising and jaw hanging open, Usopp took the offered plate.
"Sure, thank you," he muttered. "But–"
"I'm sorry, Usopp, I just..." A strained sigh escaped Sanji's lungs, and he reached to the cigarette pack. "Tolerate me a few days while I'm searching for a new apartment, okay?"
"Oh, what are you talking about." Usopp rolled his eyes, cheeks puffy from a mouthful of food. "I told you, you can stay as much as you need."
A small smile raised Sanji's lips, so faint compared to the guy's toothy grin.
The rest of the breakfast went in silence. Sanji was sipping on his coffee, smoking, trying to force all the grim thoughts out of his head. Which, by the way, still throbbed like hell.
In that dream Zoro said he loved him. It was so ridiculous to think about it now, but the truth was, Zoro actually never said Sanji that he loved him. He might've said Sanji looked fine in a new suit (adding something nasty to laugh the blond off) or that his cooking was edible (not tasty, not gorgeous, as Sanji would like to hear). Zoro never directly confirmed his feelings – if he even had any feelings for the blond.
Sanji frowned deeply, taking another drag from the cigarette. Well, not that Sanji ever told Zoro something like that himself. He wasn't sure if he was feeling something so special about Zoro in the first place. Yes, he liked Zoro nearby. Sometimes. Most of the time the idiot swordsman was pissing him off. Not to mention how apathetic that ungrateful bastard was. Sanji could imply his want for some (just some) attention into anything, but the dumb moss-head always kept being so oblivious.
Sanji never asked for any help directly, but Zoro never offered it to him as well. Sanji was doing his best for Zoro – cooking for him, waking him up when he was late for work, driving him there when he was ridiculously late, massaging his shoulders before bed and kissing his forehead with a "goodnight". But Zoro was just quietly accepting everything for granted. As if Sanji would always be by his side.
Ungrateful, egoistic, useless moron.
The blond wondered if their relationship – such a failure – was just nothing more than a habit. Back then, after that fateful fight in the Baratie, Sanji felt a strong urge to see the bastard again. And he was quite happy when the moss-head popped up there next time. From the very beginning Sanji was the one to lead them – he didn't know where, though. At first he just wanted Zoro to be his – a selfish desire indeed, but he tried, oh how hard he tried not to force the other man. And in the end Sanji couldn't say if he wasn't forcing Zoro into a relationship with him. After their first sex Zoro didn't call him, Sanji was the one who called first. Several days before that were filled with obscure thoughts, but then he was just too happy that Zoro agreed to meet with him again, and he foolishly forgot his issues. What an idiot I was.
Routine never did anything good to anybody, Sanji knew it. He couldn't justify himself when he offered Zoro to live together (and again – Zoro only nodded was all), he just felt he wanted it. Needed it, maybe. And now... Now everything was in ruins.
"Sanji," the voice sounded from the hall. "I'm going to the store, do you need anything?"
"A pack of Marlboro Gold," the blond answered. "And a razor."
"What about food?"
Sanji closed his eyes. Somehow even the thoughts about food were irregularly dispersed in his head.
"Grab anything you want, I'll manage."
"Okay!"
Opening his wallet to give Usopp the cash for purchase, Sanji felt cold in his gut. Fifty buck bill was lying in there bashfully. Picking it up and handing it to Usopp, the blond frowned.
Sure, he had rent money left on his card. Although since he wouldn't be living in that apartment anymore, it was pointless to keep them for this purpose. The rent for it wasn't very high for two people to handle, but for one person it would be a bit pricey. Would Zoro be able to manage with it by himself? Or maybe he'd move too, since it was too big for him? Not that it was Sanji's business now.
He turned Usopp's laptop on to look through vacant places to live. However, it seemed today the cook was out of luck.
Too pricy for such a small place. He chewed on the unlit cigarette discontentedly, scrolling the pages further. Too far from work. Pricy. Holy shit, that one was just insanely expensive.
Sanji lit the cigarette, scratching the back of his head. Somehow, he'd already forgotten that the previous apartment was found by pure luck and Nami's clever advice. This time it seemed that Lady Luck had left him. Was she disappointed with him? Did he offend her?
Well, if Sanji thought carefully, it was a little unfair to leave Zoro like it had been his own decision. But then, Zoro's never-ending stupidity, poor manners, dumb excuses, general obliviousness made Sanji reach his boiling point. He wasn't going to waste his life on the bastard who couldn't even wash a cup for himself. How would Zoro even feed himself? Before they met, it seemed that the moss-head was living only on instant noodles and beer. If not Sanji's kindness, he'd die from gastritis. If people could die of it, of course. He wasn't sure.
But really, how would Zoro manage by himself? Sanji's limbs ached disturbingly when he thought about the awkward swordsman trying to cook, clean that enormous apartment or, god forbid, pay the rent. But screw that, Sanji had enough of his own problems – all thanks to the green haired moron, he'd never have those without his kind help.
Usopp's return was indicated with a rustle in the hall and cheerful voices, one of which was feminine. Sanji jumped from the chair, hopping to greet the precious lady.
"Miss Nami!" He outstretched his arms with a wholehearted smile as soon as the red haired girl came to his vision.
"Hi," she smiled at him brightly and reached into her jeans pocket. Sanji's eyes widened as she handed him a small box. "Happy birthday, Sanji," she added, probably noticing his surprise.
"Oh, thank you so much, my beloved princess!" the blond bowed. "I will never forget your graciousness!"
Usopp snorted, handing him the ordered pack of smokes.
With all the nervous events Sanji had already forgotten it was his birthday yesterday. They sat in the living room, eating the cake that Nami picked so that Sanji wouldn't need to cook anything – what a lovely, kind person she was.
"Do you have anything to drink, guys?" she asked after finishing her piece.
"Beer," Usopp shrugged.
"That's just fine," Nami beamed at him. Usopp got up to go to the kitchen, rubbing his nose sheepishly.
When he quit the living room, Nami shifted on the couch closer to Sanji. Putting her soft, little hand onto his forearm, she looked straight into his eyes. The blond tried to force out a smile, but the lowered corners of Nami's lips and her serious eyes only enchained him to the seat, tense and uncomfortable.
"He told me." She nodded her head slightly in the direction of the door. "Sanji, why did you do that?"
The blond lowered his eyes. He definitely didn't want to discuss this thing now, especially with such a stunning lady. But he realized how adamant Nami was when her nails dipped into his skin.
"Sanji, listen," she blew a red lock off her nose. "I know you both are stubborn to death, but this is just wrong."
"What's wrong? That he's–"
"No, I'm talking about you!" she snapped, her gaze sharp. "I know you can be too emotional sometimes, and you don't know what you're doing."
"Well... Maybe, but this is another case," Sanji uttered reluctantly, frowning.
"No, it's not," Nami caught his chin and forced him to look at her. "I'm dead sure you just let your rage out without thinking. From what Usopp told me, it doesn't seem like such a big deal. Just try to look at the situation from Zoro's point of view – it's not his fault, and you know it, you're just willingly ignoring it."
Sanji was listening silently, peering into the dark brown eyes that looked at him with disappointment.
"It's all just circumstances," she sighed, her brows knitted distressfully. "You should do something before you regret."
"Nami, it's not your business," Usopp's voice sounded from the doorway. With his hands full of bottles, he approached the couch and sat down.
"Not my business?" The red haired girl freed Sanji from her grip and turned abruptly to the long-nosed guy. "My friends are breaking up, Usopp! It is my business!" Her voice rose higher.
"You can't change his mind, it's his decision," Usopp scowled at her, opening the bottle and handing it to Sanji.
"How can you be so cold?" Nami picked up a beer and took a large gulp. "They are more important to each other than they think! Don't you see they're making a mistake?"
"Please, can we discuss it later?" Sanji uttered sullenly. Nami's face softened, and she squeezed his shoulder.
"I'm sorry, Sanji," she said quietly. "Just... Just think about it carefully."
Sanji did want to reply that there was nothing to think about, but somehow the words stuck down in his throat.
Both Nami and Usopp were people of mood, so soon they were chatting cheerfully while the amount of bottles was decreasing. The cook was holding the conversation discretely, his mind wandering off. "They are more important to each other than they think!" These were strange words to hear from Nami, especially since she'd never shown any interest in Sanji's relationship with Zoro. She had always been distant, even when they bickered at the parties or fought. How could she come up with this conclusion then? Moreover, how could she know anything about them better than Sanji did?
Sipping on his beer and listening to the conversation with half an ear, Sanji noticed it was already 9 PM. His body instantly registered that information, giving him heavy fatigue and light throbbing in his head.
"I need to go," Nami stated, drying the remains of her beer.
"I'll see you to the station," Sanji stood up, but a small hand caught him by his wrist and forced him back onto the couch. The red haired girl possessed quite a strength for her small size.
"Don't bother, you need to rest," she smiled. "Usopp can see me off, right?" She turned to the guy, grinning somewhat evilly.
Rolling his eyes, Usopp stood up without struggle. He knew Nami wouldn't let go even if he refused.
"I'll be right back, do you need anything?" the long-nosed guy asked Sanji when they were standing in the hall.
"No, thanks," the blond waved his hand.
"Let's go?" Usopp poked Nami's shoulder after she laced her shoes.
Sanji looked into Nami's eyes. The girl answered his gaze with a small nod.
"Usopp, give us a moment," she asked the guy with a smile. He shrugged and disappeared behind the front door.
"Nami," Sanji crossed his arms on his chest, biting the inside of his cheek. "What did you mean when you said... That we don't know how important we are?"
To his slight surprise, Nami chuckled.
"I meant you're two idiots," she patted his shoulder.
"No, how did you know about... importance?" he winced at the pricking in his stomach.
"Well, it's obvious when you look at it from the side."
"Why do you–" he cut himself off, not knowing how to explain his disagreement.
Nami smiled distantly. "Sometimes you don't even realize how you feel, but when you lose it, you feel like a part of you is missing."
"Nami, it's cold, hurry up!" Usopp's exasperated yelling sounded from the outside.
"Okay!" she shouted and turned to Sanji once again. "Everything is gonna be alright," she beamed at him and left.
Sanji lit up a cigarette, staying where he stood shouldering the wall. A missing part... Was the emptiness in his chest not just a sudden crush of a habit, but the loss of something that he treasured? He didn't know. He didn't know anything anymore.
But lying on the couch in the dark, he knew one thing for sure: it was hard to fall asleep without Zoro's warm arms wrapped around him.