Um... Hi? ;-; DONT KILL ME! IM TOO SQUISHY TO DIE! I am SO sorry for making you all wait since March :( Honestly, I have no good excuse this time... Sad, right? :/ but! I have new... You can determine whether its bad or not, but to me, its kinda good :P DONT SKIP THIS PART, YOU ALL KINDA NEED TO KNOW THIS! Ok, well, a few weeks ago, I was re-reading the story and noticed just how HORRID it was... My writing style SUCKED and it was torture in my opinion to read... So! I'm in the process of rewriting it :) That's right! It's gonna be more detailed than ever! :D My writing's gotten alot better (imagine that) and it's gonna be epic XD So, sadly, that means I wont be continuing THIS version. :/ yeah sorry... Dont murder me. And if you are going to murder me, make it quick ;-; oh well... If you have ANY ideas for the new story, or anything you want me to fix or add or even take out, feel free to tell me ^_^ Ok, on to VERY old reviews... ehehheh... :(

Like u would care: :P You will find out in the rewriten story, i promise ^_^ I already have a WONDERFUL idea for presents OuO heuheuheu

DecepticonQueen: hehe, Indeed he is XD

TheYoungVolcanoO.o: I feel bad ;-; I should've updated sooner, IM SOWWY!

Darkis Shadow: It will be, I promise! :D

Mirachan: Thank you :3 and my deepest apologies for not updating sooner TT_TT

AmorEva Luna: Thank you :) and there will be eventual romance, not mushy or anything, but subtle.. And there will be information on her past and whatnot, trust me. Sorry I havent updated sooner.. :(

"On the second day of christmas my true love gave to me, two turtle doves, and a partridge in a pear tree," The radio sung out on my coffee table as I sat on the couch, slowly putting packages of food and meal prepared thermoses into a large leather bag. "On the third day of christmas my true lo-"

Death growled from inside the kitchen, "Would you turn that infernal music off? It's beginning to give me a headache." I paused in my packing, throwing Death a glance as he stormed in and cut the music off. Well he was in a chipper mood, huh? As he went back into the kitchen, an impish grin grew onto my face as I continued packing.

"On the third day of christmas my true love gave to me, three french hens, two turtle doves, and a partridge in a pear tree. On the fourth d-" My singing was cut off when a large had slapped over my mouth, and I fought off giggles as Death glared at me from behind the couch.

"I might just have to stitch your mouth closed if you don't shut up," He growled, walking around the couch and setting down a large duffle bag full of what I expected to be clothes.

I stuck my tongue out at the rider, "Oh hush, my singing was wonderful, and don't try to deny it."

"Your 'singing' sounded like a squealing pig."

"My singing sounded like an angel's harp!"

"Yes, a harp that is horribly out of tune."

I feigned a hurt look, "Oh, Death, your words wound me!" I then proceeded to pretend to die, falling dramatically on the couch. I could only imaging the annoyed look on Death's face as he rolled his eyes.

"Get up, we should get going soon, before sunhigh," Death picked up both duffle bags as I sat up and looked at him in confusion.

"Sunhigh?"

Death stood still for a moment, thinking, before sighing, "Noon." My lips formed an O as I followed Death out into the pasture. As we were getting our horses ready for the journey, I heard the faint sounds of a familiar pick up truck driving up my road. "Who is that?" The kinslayer asked, looking out the barn doors as said red pick up truck stopped just in front of my cabin.

I tightened Ruthad's stirrups after putting one of the duffle bags behind his saddle, "It's just Mr. Rider. He's gonna look after the farm while we're gone."

Death seemed to shrug, "How long will we be away?"

I looked up in thought, "Maybe about... seven days? It won't be long, no more than a week and a half." I could only assume Death had heard me, as he was silent. Grumbling a quiet 'oh well', we climbed onto our steeds and exited the stables. As we walked across the pasture, I waved a quick goodbye to Mr. Rider before he was out of sight.

It was silent as we walked, Death following me as I retraced a memorized path down the mountain. Foalen was always a few feet ahead of us, leading the way and alerting us to anything dangerous. He would often run off randomly, but always find his way back, so I wasn't worried.

After about 30 minutes of silence between us both, I turned in Ruthad's saddle so I could see Death, "It's kinda quiet.."

"Wonderful observation skills."

I made a face at him, "Ha ha.. Well, how about you tell me some stories?"

Death's brow furrowed, "Stories?"

I shrugged, "Yeah, stories. I've been meaning to ask you, but I really want to hear some of your past. You know, battles, life, whatever! Even fights with your siblings would do."

Death's gaze grew cold once more, "Absolutely not."

"Why not?"

"I will not share 'stories' of my life with some mortal."

"You're mortal too, jackass. And besides, what am I gonna do with them, tell my secret organization about your secret life so we can rule the world?"

Death's head snapped towards me again, "Secret organization?"

I snorted and held up a hand in surrender, "Oh no, you've caught me red handed. Yes, the Secret Organization of Kiss My Ass. We conspire to rule the world and overthrow the American government." I coughed to cover up a bout of laughter and smirked instead as Death glared.

"Watch your tone with me, Iris. You may have grown comfortable around me but I will not tolerate-"

I sighed, "Yes, I understand.. But still, can you pleeeease tell me a few stories?" I gave him my best puppy dog look, blinking rapidly and forcing my bottom lip to quiver, however, this had absolutely no effect on him.

"No," He growled. I sighed, resorting to Plan B. Annoyance.

"Please?"

"No."

"Please?"

"No."

"Please?"

"I said no, and that's final."

"Please?"

"No!"

"Why not?"

"Because I said so."

"That's not a real excuse."

"Who says?"

"Just about everyone." Silence. "Please?"

"Fine!" Death was on the verge of yelling, his amber eyes blazing. "Once upon a time, there was a Nephilim and a human. This human was very annoying, so one day, the Nephilim had enough and snapped her neck. The end."

I pouted childishly, "That wasn't one of YOUR stories."

Death glared at me again, and if he kept it up, I was convinced I might just burst into flames, "Yes, but it was a story." There was a long silence as we continued walking down the mountain, letting our horses go at their own pace. After a while I looked back at Death again.

"Tell me about the battle with the Ravaiim," I ordered casually, breaking the extended silence.

"What? Why?" Death asked, moving a tree branch from his way, choosing not to duck under it as I had.

I shrugged, "I'm curious. The book doesn't really give much information on them, only bothering to describe them briefly... So I wanna know. Please?"

Death adjusted himself in Despair's saddle to a more comfortable position before sighing, "Fine.. If this will keep you silent. In the early days of Creation, the laws of existence were less defined, and the separation between animate and inanimate objects was less distinct. One such race that typified this was the Ravaiim. Similar to Makers -I assume you know who they are- the Ravaiim were unique in that they could craft their own flesh into technology and weapons." As Death continued, I listened intently, smiling to myself as he got caught up in retelling the story of the battle between the Nephilim and the Ravaiim. My plan worked. Once he got into describing the race, I had guessed he might start telling the story of the Nephilim's first kill. Guess I was right.

I was silent as Death continued, him either not noticing or not caring that he was telling multiple stories of battles or of random adventures with his siblings. I really enjoyed the way he told them. He seemed to be reliving them as he told them, and I guessed that he'd never really taken the time to revisit some of his memories. That was completely understandable though. I mean, he IS the reaper of souls, he has to be a busy guy.

As the day continued, Death never stopped telling stories, which I was grateful for. It made the trip seem to go faster. By the time we had made it to a large running river, the sun was already more than halfway across the sky. Death was just finishing up describing some of the Grand Abominations that werent mention in the book, such as Anathema and Bleak Tranquility, when I slowed Ruthad down to a slow stop at the bank of the river. Death stopped beside me as we let our steeds drink (and let Foalen try and catch some fish yet fail miserably) and looked around.

"Are we close?" He asked, and I looked down the path leading upstream.

"Just about, we should be able to get there just before sunset," I whistled for Foalen as we began to travel once more, picking up the pace to a slow trot just to decrease the time. Now that Death had snapped out of his 'story telling mode' I could tell he wouldn't be telling me any more for a while.

As the sun was just beginning to set, we finally arrived at a large clearing with lush grass -well as lush as it could get right after a snow. It was protected by trees and the river became very shallow.

I grinned, "This is perfect." Death simply gave a 'hmph' as we dismounted our horses. With silent cooperation, we began to set up camp, me setting up the tent while Death went to get firewood. Foalen circled me as I began getting out cans of mixed beans and veggies, and I had to push him away so he wouldn't eat anything. Death came back with arm fulls of firewood, and I had to raise my eyebrows. Shiitake mushrooms, he might be mortal, but he was still pretty strong.

He dropped them onto the small circle I had cleared at and surrounded with stones as I took out my lighter.

However, no matter how many times I clicked it, it just wouldn't light. "Uh... Gimme a minute," I mumbled, and I could tell Death was getting impatient. Finally, after about the fifteenth time, Death pushed me to the side.

"Do you have any flint?" He growled, picking some dried grass nearby. I grumbled and sorted through my pockets, finally coming up with the two square dark fire rocks and begrudgingly handing them over to the kinslayer. Damn you fire, why must you betray me? Death sent me an arrogant triumphant look as the fire roared to life, but I simply sent him a look and poured the contents of the veggie cans into a pot. By the time they were finally warmed and ready to eat, the sun had gone down and the fire was the only source of light.

After 15 minutes or so of silence while we ate, I finally spoke up, "Have you ever told scary campfire stories before?" Death didn't even bother responding, so I guessed that was a no. However, I didn't let this dampen my happy mood. I'd never gone camping with another person before, so gosh darnit, I was going to make the best of it. "Ok, instead of scary stories, how about..." Death wasn't even looking in my direction, and I made a pouting face. He was ignoring me! The nerve of this guy! "I'll see if I can make you laugh instead! This can be a bet, how about that? If I make you laugh, you gotta tell me a scary story."

"And if I win?" Well, at least I got him to say something.

I thought for a while, "Then... You get to sleep in the tent."

"Deal."

"Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love, and got married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was great." Nothing, not even an annoyed huff. "An invisible man and an invisible woman marry. Their kids were nothing to look at either." Still nothing. "The dyslexic devil worshiper sold his soul to Santa." Ok, maybe I saw a little twitch in his eyes. "What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus." Death remained as stoic as ever, but I could see amusement beginning to make its way to his face. My terrible jokes were getting to him! "Two old ladies are sitting on a park bench when a guy suddenly jumps out of the bushes and flashes them. The first old lady had a stroke while the second old lady couldn't reach." Death made a mixture of a snort and a cough. "Was that a laugh?"

"Not even close," He growled, and I sighed in annoyance. What's it gonna take to get the Reaper of Souls to laugh?

I was silent for a while, racking my brain for anything that stood out from the normal corny jokes I would read in magazines from time to time. Death was patient as I thought, thankfully. It seemed that even he wanted to see if I could make him laugh, or maybe even chuckle a little. Finally, after almost twenty minutes of thinking, I groaned and hid my face in my hands. I could think of nothing!

"Giving up?" Death smirked, and I shot him a glare.

"It's not fair! Do you even have the ability to laugh?!" I shouted, beginning to stuff the bowls and empty food cans into a large leather bag.

Death shrugged, standing and making his way over to the tent, "Honestly, I cannot answer that. Being as old as I am, I have heard just about any joke."

I sent him an angry glare, "Oh, so you knew you'd win, huh?" Death simply sent me an eye-grin before tossing out my sleeping bag from the tent. I caught it before it could fall into the fire and pouted at Death. "Oh, come on. It's cold out here!"

"You have a fire to keep you warm, along with a dog. I'm sure you can survive," Death chuckled before the tent was zipped up, leaving me glaring daggers at it. A string of curses threatened to flow from my lips as I set up my thick sleeping bag as close to the fire as possible and let Foalen crawl in first. Suddenly, right as I was about to follow the mutt, something caught my attention. An assassin beetle was slowly crawling around the fire, and a grin that could rival the devil's crept onto my face as a plan formed. Oh, sweet revenge... As quietly as I could, I picked up a nearby stick and allowed the insect to crawl onto the tip and slowly made my way to the tent. I unzipped it slowly, trying not to make any noise, and when there was enough space, set the stick nearby to let the assassin beetle make its way inside. Once it disappeared, I closed the tent once more and settled inside my sleeping bag. Oh this was going to be great in the morning...

There we have it :/ This chapter was FRIGGIN TORTURE TO WRITE! GAH! You all have no idea how hard this was... I SPENT 4 HOURS STRAIGHT LOOKING FOR FUNNY JOKES ONLY TO GIVE UP CAUSE THE INTERNET HATES ME SOMETIMES. TT_TT My brain hurts... Anyway, just a reminder, if you didnt read it at the top, READ IT DOWN HERE! IM REWRITING THIS STORY SO THIS SPECIFIC ONE HERE WILL NOT BE UPDATED ANYMORE! Just wanna make that clear. :P

Anyway guys, You all have been so loving and great, I love you all! ^_^ I cant wait to see you in my new story, I will update this one to let you all know when it's up and where to find it :) I hope you all can forgive me for making you wait so terribly long XD Once again, I love you all dearly. I hope you all have a wonderful day/week/month/year/life XD So, I'll see you all soon in the new story :)

Bye!