...leave it up to you...

Chapter 13 : Scattered pieces to place

Squall

Tamiel walks away from Seifer and I. Seifer stands to go after her, but something stops him. He sits back down, looks at me, and... is he going to cry?

"Seifer, are you--"

"--Don't talk, Squall," he chokes out. He storms to the door and slams his hand down on the close button, then slams his head against it. He's just kind of standing there now, not making a sound.

... Actually, I think he's sobbing. What am I supposed to do? I wish I could talk to Rinoa. She just knows how to get inside and tell me what I'm thinking, especially when I don't have a clue as to what's going on inside my head.

"Squall?" I look over at Seifer and he's still leaning against the door, but he's turned towards me. His eyes are red but he's not crying; not yet, anyway. "Why are you still here?"

A breakthrough, and without either Rinoa or Tamiel. Well, it was sort of because of Tamiel that he's actually talking, but that's not the point. I guess the point is that maybe, maybe he'll talk to me.

"Because..." I hesitate, afraid to say the wrong thing. No, the truth is the right thing. Seifer needs the truth, and he needs it now. "Because I care, Seifer... I care about you."

What the... Seifer? Oh Hyne... He's crying now. Tears are streaming down his face and I don't know if they're ever going to stop. He slides down against the door to a sitting position on the carpet, head tilted forward. Pulling his knees up, he wraps his arms around them.

Slowly, I walk over. He doesn't look up. I kneel in front of him and put a hand on his knee; that gets his attention. His eyes are so red now, and there's so much pain. I choke back my own tears, seeing him like this. I never thought I'd see Seifer break down...

"Seifer?" I ask. His eyes focus only on mine, and for a split second, it's like there's nothing else in the world but us: him with his pain, and me with mine.

He sobs a few times, trying to breathe. "Y...yeah?"

"Do you believe me?"

I don't know what he's going to say. I'm... scared, scared of what he'll say.

"... I... I lost a huge part of myself, with Ultimecia."

That's not answering the question, but Hyne, it's something.

He wipes his tears away with the sleeve of his jacket. It's not the one he used to wear, though; it's dark brown. "I guess I thought I found what was missing... from my life. But I was wrong, really wrong. Being with her, it made me eventually realize that the only thing I was missing was... was..."

Seifer stops and there are fresh tears. I bite the inside of my lip; what am I supposed to do? He's shaking now, and the sobs are harder; he's coughing, too. My hand is still on his knee, but I know it's not any comfort. He needs comfort now, more than anything. Am I just... I'm too scared to comfort him. Even now, I don't know what to do. No; Seifer deserves better than this. He deserves more than I can offer, and everyone knows it. But... I can try. I will try.

"Seifer, look at me."

... I don't know how much longer I can hold my tears back. His whole world is reflected in those blue eyes of his, and it's not a pretty world. Where my life started, his stopped. During the Ultimecia ordeal, I came in to who I am, while he was cast out, thrown aside. Even I didn't try to help him then. I didn't lie when I said I never hated him, because I never did, never have; but I never tried to help him.

It's too much. I put my arms around Seifer and pull him against me, cradling his head against my shoulder. He's always been taller than me, and he still is. That doesn't matter now, though. I don't know what matters right now. I don't care what matters.

"... Yeah," Seifer mumbles into my shoulder.

"What?" I ask. He puts his arms around me, and tightens them. I can feel his tears soaking into my shirt as new ones form in his eyes.

"Yeah," he repeats softly; it's almost so soft I can't hear him. "I believe you."

This chapter is dedicated to JadeAlmasy Dysis Raine for reviewing and being patient with me! Also Stellar Abyss for keeping me on the Chapter Alerts. Sorry for the long delay guys, but I'm back on track with chapters to post. Enjoy!!