Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters from Grey's Anatomy. I just manipulate them to my will. Also, any line or phrase or setting that seems remotely familiar from any other show, movie or book, also not mine. I borrow…

Prompt: Help! I need some happy after 9.1! Can you write a really short fic about something that causes Arizona to shift from despair to hope? Maybe something as simple as seeing Sofia fall while trying to walk?

AN: Somehow my queue just keeps getting longer and longer. But no worries, I will get to all of them. Promise. Enjoy! …Oh, and to the delightful anon who called me a 'redneck dyke' I just wanted to tell you that you can kiss my country ass.

Walk Before You Run

"You're doing much better."

"Hang in there."

"It'll take time."

"You'll get there."

All these phrases have been said to the point of meaning nothing. Everyday Arizona has to hear them, whether it's from a passing nurse who is trying to offer their sympathy, or a fellow patient, or even her wife. Every day the blonde is told something along those lines. To keep fighting. Hold her head up. Never give up. …How she wishes she could shut them up but using her leg to knock them across the room.

"Come on, Dr. Robbins, let's do it again." Her physical therapist says as Arizona sits, weak and shaking as she tries to recover from the hell she just went through.

"I can't." The blonde gasps, this time sure she is actually going to die a pain. She survived four days of being trapped out in the wilderness, her femur exposed to bugs and maggots, hungry animals circling closer and closer with each passing hour, but walking that bar of ten feet is what will end up killing her.

"You can." Her therapist says firmly. "You just did it, and you can do it again."

"I. Can't." Arizona spits, letting her anger spill out again. Her therapist, trauma therapist, tells her that her lashing out is a coping mechanism. If she stays mad at Callie, and Karev… anyone, then she doesn't have to deal with what she actually went through. But the thing Dr. Turner doesn't understand is that
Arizona is perfectly happy staying mad. It'll just be a new and improved Arizona. People don't try to walk all over her now because she's built up this reputation of being a bitch. That can't be so bad, right? She can get through life being considered dark and twisty versus perky and cheerful. …It works for Grey and Yang.

The physical therapist lets out a long sigh and pulls up a chair in front of her, evening the playing field, and right then Arizona knows there is another 'inspirational' moment coming her way.

"I get it." He says, nodding slowly and staring into angry blue eyes. "I do. You've been through a lot, Dr. Robbins. You all have. You survived something… unimaginable." He pauses for dramatic effect, but all Arizona can do is stare at the man's nose and wonder how many times his patients have actually broken it because of these stupid speeches. "But you did, Arizona. You survived. And I understand how scary it must be losing a limb, but you can get through it. I know you can. I've heard so many great things about you… about your family… Dr. Robbins, you have so many wonderful things in your life to fight for."

Arizona sits, her body slowly recovering, and allows this man… Ben, or Bob, maybe even Bill, she doesn't know or care… to say what he has to say.

When he gives the blonde a warm smile while also patting her right leg softly, she sucks at her teeth and asks sharply, "You done?"

"Excuse me?" He asks in confusion.

"I wouldn't want to interrupt your little speech if there was more." Arizona states, then shifts forward in her seat to move even closer to Ben… or is it Bob? "You say you get? You understand?" The blonde asks in a low voice, one that makes the hairs on the back of the therapists neck stand on end. "Tell me… Have you fallen out of the sky? Have you woken up with a bone sticking out of your leg? Have you had to brace your fractured thigh with a belt? …Have you waited and prayed and cried for four days and for four nights, begging whatever is out there that they send help?"

Something is happening within her and Arizona can't stop it, all the anger and pain and rage that she's kept contained… yes, there is even more… starts to bubble up.

Before she knows it Arizona is standing, the burn in her left leg only urging her on more. "You think you have any idea what I've been through? You heard some mindless gossip around the halls and you think you know? You don't know! You don't know what it's like."

"Dr. Robbins, I-"

"No!" Arizona snaps, then reaches down in a blind rage and rips her leg off. "You don't know what it's like! Can you do this?" She holds the prosthesis away from her in disgust, and when the man doesn't respond she heaves it across the room.

Her leg hits a wall of therapy balls, sending them scattering. But it's not enough, she needs more. So Arizona reaches for her crutches just beside her and she heaves one, it hitting the PT door with a clang. Tears are running down her face but she doesn't care, and with as much strength as her battered body can handle, Arizona slings her last crutch into the glass partition, shattering it with a crash. The momentum of her throw sends her falling to the floor, landing on the floor with a hard slap.

She feels a hand on her arm but she shoves it off, "Don't touch me!"

"Let me help you." He says, gripping her tighter.

But Arizona still remembers her time on the playground, and all those punching lessons from her father, and shoves the therapist off her with surprising strength. "Get off! I don't want your help!"

"What's going on?" A third voice interrupts, the therapist turning from his downed patient to see Dr. Callie Torres standing in the doorway, little Sofia squirming in her arms.

Brown eyes survey the room, taking in the mess scattered all over as well as the unceremoniously splayed multi-thousand dollar leg and the cracked window, as well as the sobbing blonde on the floor.

The ortho surgeon pushes through the mess and asks again "What the hell is-"

"Dr. Torres." The therapist interrupts, and Callie can see he's trying to keep calm but is failing quickly. "May I talk to you outside?" He walks past her and exits the room, not even looking back at Arizona who is still on the floor.

She looks back at her wife one more time, knowing the Arizona is purposefully keeping her face hidden from her so the Latina won't see the tears, and nods. Callie follows in the therapists wake but as Sofia sees she's being taken further and further away from her mama, she starts to struggle.

The ortho surgeon joins her wife's therapist outside the room, and asks "What happened?"

"I can't help her." He states directly.

"Look… I know she's having problems with her anger but she's seeing Dr. Turner about it." Callie tells the man, still fighting to keep hold of her squirming daughter. "Arizona is just working through everything at her own-"

"I can't help someone if they don't want to be helped." The man interrupts. "And today…" He gestures to the broken window next to them, brown eyes staring through it to find her blonde sitting up and crying into her hands. "…I can't keep replacing these things, Dr. Torres. You know that."

Callie finally gives up with Sofia and sets her on the floor, turning her full attention to the man in front of her. "I'll pay for the damages." She says nervously. "But please… just don't quit on us." She pleads. This is the third therapist Arizona has seen in a month, the previous two not being able to handle the pissed off and raging blonde, and Callie is sure that if this man quits too that they won't be able to get anymore help here.

The two doctors are entrenched in their argument and a bored Sofia decides to go visit her mama. With shaky steps she rounds the corner and enters the PT room, brown eyes focused on her target. There, leaning back against the far wall with her head in her hands, is Arizona. Sofia doesn't know what's happening, or why her mama has been gone so much lately. But she's here now and that's all the tiny human needs to know.

"Mama!" She squeals excitedly, the last few steps towards Arizona coming faster and faster.

Blue eyes look up just in time to see her daughter running towards her, her new shoes tripping her up and sending the girl falling to the floor. But Sofia doesn't let it bother her, instead she gets right back up again and closes the small distance between them.

Arizona holds her daughter tight against her, breathing in the unique smell of baby shampoo and their home, and whispers "Hi big girl. How are you?"

Sofia doesn't answer, instead she grabs one of the closest balls and sits in her mama's lap while Arizona brushes back her hair. The blonde can hear her wife on the other side of the door yelling and arguing with Ben… or Bob… and she knows it's about her. It's always about her nowadays. People she passes talk about her, people she doesn't even know. Arizona knows they are talking about her, looking at her leg. But in all actuality… she doesn't care. That's not what has her angry. Let people talk. Hell, she's been through it before. Coming out of the closet when your father is a Colonel in the Marines isn't as much fun as you think. And then adding all the middle and high school drama? …Arizona's heard it all before.

Feet shuffling across the linoleum floor pull blue eyes back up to find Callie standing in front of her, staring down with an expression that is more complex than separating conjoined babies. Neither speak, and after a minute Sofia becomes bored, opting to go across the room and play in the stack of towels that were a casualty of the blonde's rampage.

She watches her daughter shuffle away, biting her lip to keep from crying again, and doesn't look over when Callie leans against the wall and slides to the floor.

"You can't keep doing this, Arizona." Torres whispers, also watching their daughter entertain herself. "You can't keep chasing people off."

"Is that supposed to make me laugh?" Arizona asks snidely, turning to catch her wife's gaze. "Some sort of sick crippled humor?"

Callie's shoulders slump, the Latina so tired of always having to think so carefully about what she says. "What do I have to do, Arizona? Huh? What do I have to do to make you… want to live again?" In an instant Arizona's attitude shifts and she suddenly feels guilty. She did live, when three others died. Jerry, Lexie… Mark. They all died. And for some reason, some unknown reason, Arizona is still alive. Not living… just existing.

Her gaze drops to the floor but Callie is about to let her run again. Reaching over and grabbing her wife's chin, Torres pulls her gaze back up and says "Because I will do anything. Whatever it takes, I will do it. Just tell me, please." But all she gets is silence from the blonde. "Arizona… please, sweetie. Talk to me. For once just… just talk to me."

Teary blue orbs falter for a second, but Arizona finally whispers "I can't see it…"

Confusion clouds brown eyes and Callie asks "See what?"

"I… I can't see it." The blonde says again, her gaze turning back to her daughter who is trying to lift a ten pound therapy ball, her little face screwed up in concentration. "You know how, when you're a kid, you have this… this vision of what you think your life is going to be like? Mine has shifted over the years, but there was always this… this woman. She was always there. She didn't have a name, or a face… just this grayish outline. …I'd dream about her, about our future together and all the happy memories that we would share."

Arizona takes a breath and glances over to her wife. "And then I met you. …And that nameless, faceless woman wasn't so nameless and faceless. …She was you. And I thought… 'yes, I'm finally living my dream', you know? But… then Africa happened." Both women's eyes drop to the floor, neither forgetting what happened all those years ago.

"I screwed up, made the worst mistake of my life… and I came home to find that woman, the woman I'd dreamt about spending the rest of my life with, pregnant." Arizona pauses for a couple of seconds, a little surprised at how much it hurts after all this time. Sure, she got something unbelievable out of it, she got Sofia, but that doesn't mean it still doesn't hurt.

Her pause lasts so long that Callie is sure her wife is waiting for some sort of response, but just as she's reaching for a fair hand and trying to figure out what to say, Arizona continues. "And then that vision changed again, and suddenly I was picturing a baby in my life. And I was happy, so happy… Even with Mark there. …Because I had you, Calliope. I had you, and I had Sofia." A strong, bone breaking hand find Arizona's and Callie grips the blonde's hand to let her know she still has them. "I saw myself teaching her to walk, and swim. …Running alongside her as she tried to ride a big girls bike for the first time. Showing her how to use wheely sneaks. I imagined teaching her to dance, and taking her dress shopping for her first prom. …Walking her down the aisle. I saw all those things, Callie. But I don't see it anymore."

A tear escapes rich brown eyes but Callie doesn't wipe it away, instead she scoots closer to the blonde and asks "Why? Why don't you think you can have all that?"

"Because!" Arizona cries, gesturing to her leg like it's the scourge of the earth. "How am I ever going to run beside my daughter with this?!"

No matter how much she tries to tell her wife differently, Callie knows that Arizona isn't going to listen to her. So instead the Latina goes a different route. "What if it was Sofia?" When the blonde looks at her with confusion in her eyes, Callie adds "What if it was Sofia who… who didn't have a leg? What if she was like Sloane Sloan's baby before Addison operated on it? What if she was born without a leg?...Or any of your other patients?"

"Callie…" Arizona sighs, so not in the mood for this. She just wants to be miserable and to cook in her own depression.

But Callie tugs on her hands, pulling her attention back to the ortho surgeon. "I'm serious, Arizona. What if it was one of your kids? Would you tell them that all that stuff was impossible? That just because they didn't have a leg that meant they couldn't… dance or run or have a normal life?" All she's met with is silence.

"No, you wouldn't. Sure, it's going to be hard. Really, really hard. And you're going to want to give up. But you know what? …I'm not going to let you. Sofia isn't going to let you." By now Callie is right in the blonde's face, trying to connect on some level deep within Arizona's soul. "You may not see it anymore, Arizona, but I do. Ok? I do, and I'm going to make sure you see it again. …That's a promise that I can keep."

A high pitched giggle bouncing around the room pulls their attention away from one another to their daughter, Sofia now trying to chase a ball around the room as she kicks it. And Arizona can't help but laugh when she watches her take a fall, but quickly picks herself back up again and gives chase once more.

"When she was learning to walk, what did you used to say to her?" Callie whispers. "When she would try and try, only to fall and cry, what did you say to her?"

A lump rises in Arizona's throat and she has to swallow it or she is sure she will lose it right there on that floor. The Latina gets to her feet and stands in front of the blonde, holding a hand out to help her up but Arizona doesn't take it. So Callie squats down, coming eye to eye with each other.

"What did you say?" She asks again. "You gotta crawl before you walk, girl,…"

The blonde eyes her wife's hands, slowly reaching out to take them and being pulled up into the standing position. And with a deep breath, she adds "…walk before you run."