Chapter 6 - Who am I, who is he ?
Mao pull his traveler bag slowly toward the main door of their hotel room. His face forming a cloudy expression. His heart sour.
'We need to discuss something when you get back home' - message from Nachi. Mao received it last night. Mao reply asking about what but Nachi didn't reply back. It make him curious.
"Mao". -Voice from his behind. Mao stop walking and turn to look. Watanabe who also pulling his bag walk fast toward him.
"Wait for me, why you always like to walk alone". - Watanabe complaint.
"Because you scare people spotted us...I mean your fans..." - Mao answer coldly.
"Mao, after we get back home, it will be like usual ?". - Watanabe ask for explanation.
Will they be like usual ? Mao secretly meeting him behind Nachi's back, secretly texting him, make love in rushing before Nachi back... Will they ?
"Maybe.. I don't know Dai-chan... I don't know how much longer I can hold on like this...". - Mao eyes turn to small, teary.
The lift door open and they get in.
"Choose me. I will change. I will never let you go again". - Watanabe convinced Mao.
"Dai-chan... I'm scare...". - Mao landed his head to Watanabe shoulder and closed his eyes.
"Nachi, I better get going.. Settle this in wise way ok ?". - Amu get his bag and walk slowly toward the main door of Nachi apartment. Amu face worried. He can understand why Nachi suddenly turn like this. Nachi, turn himself into silent, after found the white envelope and what was the picture look in it.
'Easy to fall... Easy to loose' . Amu words before suddenly poke in Nachi mind.
"Who am I ? Who is he ?". - Nachi suddenly talk. Breaking the silent he made. Amu stop walking and turn to face his best friend.
"Only Mao had that answer". - Amu talk and walk, leaved Nachi crying in silent.
Nachi feel the time moving slowly. Waiting for Mao to come home today seems so long. He open again the white envelope he discover hidden under the stack of their clothes. Looking sharply each of the photo. His mind full of question, his heart full of ache.
He get up from sofa, make his way to kitchen, making something for their dinner.
Of flight back to Tokyo, Watanabe keep tightly Mao hand, they sit side by side. Just two of them. Mao just starred at window.
"Mao... I will not forget the week we spend". - Watanabe open up the conversation.
"Hhmmm...". - Mao reaction. His eyes still looking outside the window.
"Mao, you miss him ?". - Watanabe try to get Mao attention again. Mao suddenly turn his face and look at Watanabe.
"I do. But I feel something will happen when I get back home". - Mao grabbed Watanabe hand firmly.
"Something ?". - Watanabe raise his eyebrows.
"He texting say that he need to discuss something...when I ask, he didn't reply". - Mao told his worry.
"Hhmmm... Secret been discover". - Watanabe whisper to himself with smile.
"Eehh ?". - Mao asking in confused.
"No...nothing. But Mao... Whatever happen, I always stay by your side. I love you and I will be with you". - Watanabe convinced.
Deep inside Watanabe Daisuke heart, there is fireworks. He guest that Nachi has discover what he put in their bedroom.
"Tadaima". - Mao said nervously. Trying to calm himself. He walk in and suddenly stop. His eyes looking sharply at Nachi who sit on sofa. No tv turn on.
"Hhmm, how's your trip ?". - Nachi get up and smile bitterly to Mao. Giving Mao a light kiss on his forehead.
"Busy...eerr.. Tired". - Mao smile, pulling his bag towards their bedroom. Avoiding Nachi eyes.
Mao open the bedroom door. Sigh. He put his bed near the bed and sit. His eyes rolled around. Nothing change. Maybe he think too much. He grabbed towel and walk to restroom.
"You didn't work tonight ?". - Mao open up a conversation when he started to feel awkward that they just eating in silent, the sound only coming from tv that he turn on.
"My off day". - Nachi reply shortly. His eyes didn't meet Mao, just landed on his plate.
"Nachi...". - Mao called his lover name softly. Looking at Nachi that has no face expression.
"Hhmm?". - Nachi lift up his face. Looking sharply at Mao. Mao look down quickly. His heart beat fast.
After dinner, they sit silently on sofa. Drinking wine that Mao bought and eating cakes that Nachi order earlier.
"Mao... Do you really love me ?". - Nachi ask. Mao who was about to take another bite of his red velvet cake stop. He freeze.
"I love you".
"More than anything and anyone ?".
"I love you...". - Mao try to look away after he answer.
Suddenly Nachi put the white envelope on table in front of Mao. Mao take it and open it carefully. His eyes widen looking at all the photos. He look at Nachi face and the photo many times.
"This...". - Mao couldn't find his words. The photo of him and Watanabe in intimate posed.
"I deserved an explanation...even it was painful...". - Nachi sigh. He move to sit next to Mao, grabbed Mao hand softly.
"Mao, you know I love you ? Being with you is like a dream come true..."
"Nachi...". - Mao called his lover name softly. Suddenly tears started to run down his cheeks. Nachi who shock pull softly Mao in his arms.
"I...I don't want to remember how hurt I get pushed away...". - Mao confess and cry.
"I love him. He was my first love.. That's my thought. But it wasn't turn to be like what I want. It was just me... The image of me and Dai-chan together was just all in my head. Not in him". - Mao explain.
"But then after I found you, I told myself that I just want to love you. Only you. I feel so happy...but... He came back to me... He say he was so wrong... I know I couldn't forget him and things started to go wrong way again...". - Mao push Nachi body softly. He look at Nachi warm eyes. This time, Nachi face look more calm than before.
"Mao... Since when...?". - Nachi ask carefully. Even his heart hurt listen to Mao explanation, he still feel he need to care for Mao heart, what Mao says is enough to show how he feel sorry.
"Year ago... I'm sorry... ". - Mao look down. He cry silently. Mao get up and try to walk but Nachi grabbed him and hugged him from behind.
"Mao, I love you". - Nachi whisper softly.
"Nachi...". - Mao tears run down.
Nachi stroke softly Mao sleeping face. Mao sleep silently after they make love. Its been a whole week they didn't be together, feel themselves in.
Nachi heart still hurt. Even when they kissed after Mao confession. The taste of his lover lips seems different. Maybe because he imagine 'Dai-chan' who did the same thing to Mao too.
"Is he too good for you ?". - Nachi ask.
"What make you willing to be with him secretly ?". - Nachi ask again to Mao who fall in deep sleep.
Watanabe Daisuke drink his wine slowly. Starring at dark skies of late night in Tokyo. His mind can't stop thinking about Mao.
'How was his situation now ?' Watanabe couldn't help but pray for their break up.
DaiMao. The image of them. The love they acted. But to Mao it was real. Its pure. Dai-chan is everything to Mao. Dai-chan a real love to Mao.
But to Watanabe, he was scare. Scare to loose all he got from the image they acted. So he decided to push the real feeling. He think it was the best way, but year ago, after he started to realized Mao acted the way he wanted, acted like brothers, acted like just good friends... He realized he was so wrong. He feel hurt. More hurt after he knew, Mao had replace 'Dai-chan' with 'Nachi'.
Accidentally meeting both of them and see how 'Dai-chan' has been replaced by 'Nachi' in Mao heart is painful, twice than what he have hurt Mao by denying Mao love to him. Watanabe try to live like nothing happen, but he couldn't do it.
Then he started to beg Mao to be with him back. The real love. He wanted to replace 'Nachi' in Mao heart.
"Mao ! Please ! I'm sorry ! I really regret ! I love you !". - Watanabe hugged Mao tightly. One night after they decided to sleep at hotel after photo shooting that happen outside Tokyo.
"Dai-chan...let me go !". - Mao pushed him harshly. His big cute eyes widen. His breath wasn't in tempo.
"Mao ! Be with me ! Please !". - Watanabe grabbed Mao and pushed him on bed. He lay on top of Mao. Try to kiss him.
"Dai-chan ! No ! Let me go ! Please...". - Mao begging. His tears started to run down when Watanabe lips play around his lips and neck.
"Dai-chan...no...please...". - Mao continue to beg when Watanabe started to unbutton his shirt.
Watanabe ignore the request. To him, let Mao feels him inside. He was better than 'Nachi' ! He was better than anyone Mao love !
Mao stop pushing Watanabe. Even his eyes still blurry by tears, he stop begging. Mao close his eyes tightly. Feeling every kiss Watanabe shower on him. Feeling the hot breath.
"Mao, I love you so much". - A whisper in Mao ears.
"Dai-chan...". - Mao open his eyes. Watanabe finger swept his tears and they kissed.
Started from that day. They had meeting secretly behind Nachi. Watanabe realized, Mao had took dangerous route for both of them.
"Mao... Please choose now". - Watanabe whisper to himself, starring at the dark skies.
A/N : I'm sorry to those who read this fiction that I took such a long time to update ! I've been busy (well this such common excuse) with my life and I had face some difficulties to get some idea. But I hope, with my update, there's still reader willing to read and give comment (is there any...haha...?) Look at the last date...half year ? *bang*