Deconstruction

When Spike woke from his dream Buffy told him he'd been freaking her out, with the emotions he'd been sending through their link. He asked her if she dreamt, too, and she was tempted to lie, until she realized that he already knew and that she literally couldn't hide anything from him anyway.

"Stupid claim," she muttered in frustration, and instantly disappointment flooded her. Disappointment, sorrow, resignation, and grief – all of which were coming from Spike.

Looking up at her hurting mate she tried to reassure him that she didn't mean the offhand comment.

"I do not regret this thing we have!"

"What did you dream?" he asked, bypassing sentiment and sticking closely to the matter in hand. Buffy sighed and told him she had conversed with the first Slayer.

"The first one, huh? Explains the sense of being ancient, but not the darkness."

Her brow furrowed. "I don't know what you mean."

"Doesn't matter. Tell me what she said."

"She… She said I'm full of love."

He nodded. "With you so far."

The Slayer sighed again, then continued, "She said a lot of stuff. Half of which was in some kind of code that I'm pretty sure only made sense to people that are her… but the message was clear."

"She wants us apart," Spike summarized.

"Well, yeah," Buffy admitted. "But that doesn't matter. I mean, she's not even alive anymore! What she wants counts for zero, because I want us together."

"You sure?"

"I'm the one that asked for it, aren't I?"

"Maybe you didn't know what it'd be like," he said, casting his eyes around the darkened room. "Maybe you change-"

Buffy took his hand and said, "It's been wonderful, Spike. Better than what I expected."

He was looking at her again, then. "Really?"

"Yes, really," she insisted, before trying to kiss him. Spike shied away, though. "This is really bothering you, isn't it?"

"Of course it is! I don't want to take your bloody destiny away!"

"My destiny? What are you talking about?"

"Bint didn't mention that part to you?"

Buffy shook her head. There was annoyance and frustration rolling off her in waves, then anger as Spike told her the ultimatum he'd been given.

"I can't believe she said that. Stupid witch!"

"Buffy…"

"What? It's a horrible thing to tell you. To make you think – wait, you believe her?"

"You don't?"

The Slayer shook her head again, saying, "I think if I was in danger of losing my destiny she would have told me. Or, actually, be able to figure it out on my own. None of the cryptic crap she said sounded like that at all."

"And if you're wrong?" he asked, quietly.

"Then I'm wrong! We're not breaking the claim. Unless… Is that what you want?"

She didn't know why she asked, because she knew with her entire being that breaking the claim was the last thing in the world Spike wanted, second only to the possibly of hurting her. And therein lay the problem.

"Look, Spike," she continued, in a more gentle tone. "This is nothing. Just a bitter dead Slayer trying to shake us up. Don't worry about it."

"Okay," he agreed, while still worrying about it. She could hear all the little panicked thoughts running around his head, but chose to ignore them and kiss him goodnight. He didn't pull away that time, and as she rolled on her side, he spooned her tightly against his chest.

When the Slayer woke up again, later that morning, Buffy caught Spike wondering if breaking the claim was even possible.

'Must be,' he thought, 'If the bint's asking me to do it.'

Turning around to face her mate, Buffy asked if he'd actually managed to get back to sleep at all.

"Not so much," he admitted.

"Okay, so you have no idea how to break a claim? Well, I have no clue how someone can lose their destiny. As far as I'm concerned neither are possible, so the whole thing's void."

The logic of what she said did reassure him, a bit, but he resolved to ask the watcher about it. Buffy didn't dissuade him, hoping it might help, but she was let down by her father figure.

"If there's any risk at all to the mission you should sacrifice the claim," Giles had told them.

She was flabbergasted. Speechless. And Spike was feeling rejection so strong she could barely comprehend it.

'You are not losing me,' she told him, silently, as she squeezed his hand with enough force that would have left a mortal bleeding. 'I'll marry you if I have to.'

His eyes lit up – wide and awestruck – at that.

"You don't have to marry me," he answered her, aloud, much to the confusion of Rupert. "But thanks for sayin' it."

Buffy let out a sigh of relief and said, "Good. Because we totally can't afford a wedding."

He smiled at her levity and decided that he would stop projecting his anguish unto her.

"Not sure brooding suits me," he said.

"Not at all," she agreed. "Makes you look old."

"Oi!" he laughed.

"Oh, oi yourself," Buffy replied, before kissing him. She could never stop kissing him for long. His lips were like an addiction to her.

"Was some sort of decision reached?" Giles asked, after watching the exchange.

"Yeah," Buffy answered him, with a broad smile, when the lip lock ended. "I'm keeping this one. He's my destiny."

The watcher tried to argue with her, but she was not for shifting. In fact, the entire situation had only made her more determined to tie herself to Spike.

Later that day, between training and patrolling, she asked if she could move in.

"I thought you already had," he replied with sincerity. "You spend all your time here.

"I know. You're right. Just, can I? Officially?"

"That depends…"

"On what?"

"On if yer mom plans on officially hating me for taking her little girl away."

Buffy rolled her eyes and echoed his earlier words saying, "I already spend all my time here."

"Not officially," he reminded her.

"Spike!" she whined, wanting a real answer, and he grinned.

"Nothin' would make me happier, pet."

Relieved, the Slayer told him she was going to redecorate and withdraw her application to live in the student dorms the following week.

"I ate a decorator, once," said Spike. "Thought he'd passed on bloody great taste. Pardon the pun."

Buffy rolled her eyes, but effect of the gesture was negated by the smile on her face.

"Living together with my boyfriend. This is totally gonna be great!"

To be continued...