Resolution

Buffy returned to the apartment to find Spike waiting for her. That was not an unusual occurrence, of course, but this time he had a grin on his face and was crowing about Giles agreeing with his theory – having heard the conversation second hand, via the claim.

"He was talking about the Slayer bit, not about the all demons not necessarily being evil thing," Buffy pointed out. Instantly the smile fell from the Vampire's face, and the Slayer realized she'd messed up again.

"Keep tryin' to tell you it's the same bloody principal!"

Buffy took his hand and guided him to the couch, then asked him to explain it again.

"But we've been through it. An' as strange as this sounds, I don' wanna fight you."

Buffy waved her free hand dismissively at the thought of another argument.

"One more time. I'll be open minded."

With a pout he asked if she promised. Buffy found it adorable – the pout of his – and agreed.

"Tell me about you," she requested. "It'll make sense that way."

Spike looked at her in confusion and she clarified by saying, "Don't talk about concepts. Forget about the bigger picture for a minute. You said you were as evil as you want to be. That bit seems to compute. Start there."

"Right, okay," he paused to think about it.

"Right," he began again. "It's like, I've always known the difference between right an' wrong, right? Undead or not. Bein' a vamp jus' doesn't make you care about the difference very much. You have desires for the bad so that's what you do. Follow yer blood, init. But it's not by force. There's still a choice. Evil's jus' the easier road. You need motivation to go against it."

The Slayer was nodding. His words seemed to make sense, at least on the surface. She knew he didn't have a soul, yet could do good things. Still didn't relate to the rest of her worldview, though.

"Where does that leave me with other vampires?"

"Same place as always. You stake 'em dead. Don't give them the benefit of the doubt."

She frowned. "But that doesn't seem fair."

"Because it's not, but unless you want more dead bodies around, it's the way things have to be. Look, I know the wanker's council like to tell you things are black and white. And I can see why, okay? If you stop to wonder if a demon could be good years down the road every time you're in battle you're gonna get killed right quick."

Buffy groaned. She understood what he was getting at now, but she didn't like it.

"Demons: evil until proven innocent?" she asked, in summary.

Spike smiled at her. "Yeah, pet. Think that's a good way to think on it."

"Right, 'cause it implies that they can be good – can do good things – but that I should be wary of them until I know what team they're on for sure. And when you talk about embracing your true nature it's not about evil, it's about strength. Power 'n' stuff."

Spike's grin grew wider at her words. With a deep sigh of relief she said, "I think I can work with that. Do I get a cookie?"

"You can have anything you want, baby," her Mate crooned. Clearly he was very, very, pleased with her.

Across town, in the student dorms, Oz and Willow were having a heart to heart of a different nature. It was awkward. Willow didn't know what to say to him, to explain her actions. Even in her head it just sounded like pathetic excuses.

"I'm sorry," were the words she finally opted for.

"You're not," said Oz, who then instantly corrected himself. "That it hurt me, yeah. But not that it happened."

She didn't reply. He was right. A smart guy who had time to do a little thinking was a powerful thing.

"It's okay," he continued, then shook his head. "Not okay, but… I think I understand."

"Really?" the witch wasn't sure she did. The attraction she felt for Tara came out of nowhere, and it was strong, but it didn't diminish what she felt for Oz at all.

He was still talking – telling her about this other wolf he met, that he instinctively wanted to go after. She didn't want to hear it, of course, but she needed to. And after what she'd done, she deserved the pain of his words.

"The thing is, I didn't. And not because of you, really," his brow knit together. "I mean, it was because of what you did. I didn't want to hurt you like that. I knew what it felt like. But if that hadn't happened, I think I might have. Because it just felt so right, y'know? And it didn't seem to have anything to do with what we have."

"What are you saying?" she asked – her voice trembling. Willow wished that if he was going to end things he would just do it already, and not drag it out. Though, again, she conceded that she deserved as much.

"I think I'm saying I know how hard it is to have urges."

"Okay…"

"I wondering if you're built to be in a relationship with a single person. And that has me wondering if there's actually anything intrinsically wrong with that. Your nature's your nature, right? Maybe you shouldn't fight it."

"Oz, I don't-"

He held up a hand to stop her, and carried on. "This is what I know: I don't want to lose you, and I believe that you love me. And what I think is that you love Tara, too. I think that I've known that, since you first met. That it's something beyond both of you. And I don't want to fight that, so…"

"So?"

"So," he continued – not really looking at her - his brow still knit together in deep concentration. "I'm wondering if, maybe, you could have both."

To be continued...