VII. Wendy, September 14
Wendy Darling was one of those first name-last name people. You know the types—she was one of those people who was always referred to by full name, even if it was obvious who you were talking about. Wendy often wondered why it was that she was one of those first name-last name people. It wasn't like Wendy was a common name or anything—she was quite sure she was the only Wendy at the school. She got the feeling she was only one of those people by virtue of being best friends with one of those people—namely, Peter Pan. He was never just Peter. Never a Peter without a Pan. Being just plain Peter would've been much too dull for him. But Wendy would have been okay with being plain old Wendy. It seemed, however, that she had no choice but to be Wendy Darling forever.
In truth, Wendy Darling would've rather been Wendy Pan. She knew it was a silly thing to think when they were both only sophomores, but she thought it nonetheless. Wendy Darling had a nicer ring to it than Wendy Pan, she thought, but Pan was his name. She was his best friend, but really, she just wanted to be his. Over the summer, she had developed this whole elaborate plan about how she was going to phase herself out of the friend zone and turn their long-running friendship into a romance. The plan was seamless. Everything was planned out. But now, something was stopping her from initiating the plan: Tiger Lily.
She was only a freshman. Apparently, she and Peter had gone to preschool together and hadn't seen each other since. Wendy watched them from afar, not wanting to hear their conversation because she didn't want them to be having one at all. It wasn't an inviting conversation, either. They talked with their bodies and faces near each others'. She would laugh and touch his arm or his chest. He would sometimes touch her black hair or hold her rich, dark hand. And it made Wendy's blood boil. There was no doubt the girl was beautiful. And she didn't have a friend zone to escape from, which made it that much easier for her. Wendy had a sinking feeling that she wouldn't be able to win this one.
Wendy's first class this rainy Tuesday morning was French 1. She had used one of her electives to start taking another language class. She had taken Spanish 1 last year, and she was taking Spanish 2, but the idea of being tri-lingual appealed to her—well, and to her parents. For the most part, French 1 was full of unfamiliar faces, though she was getting to know a few people. It was mainly a freshman class, as all freshmen were required to take a first-year language class. There was one face that quickly became familiar to Wendy—Tiger Lily's. Of course, Wendy acted as if she didn't know who Tiger Lily was. She couldn't let on that her relationship with Peter Pan was in any way bothersome to her. But she also couldn't bear to look the girl in the eye and be civil. And Wendy wasn't the type to be uncivil, so she decided to just ignore the girl's existence.
Monsieur Chandelle, a bubbly, brown-haired Frenchman, sauntered into the room. The best way to describe him was as a long person. He was tall and lanky, and even his face seemed disproportionately tall. He kept his shoulder-length hair tied back into a neat ponytail and always dressed in an extremely professional manner. He was a kind man with a sense of humor, the kind of teacher that was extremely scarce at Walt Disney High School.
"Hello everyone!" M. Chandelle said brightly in his French accent as he waltzed in. "How are we all doing today?"
A few grumbled replies came from the wet and tired crowd.
"Oh, don't all look so glum," M. Chandelle said. "This is French! French is fun! Well, I'll at least try to make it as fun as possible. Who would like to read their homework first? No one? Of course no one. I hate to put anyone on the spot—but if no one will volunteer…"
"I'll read mine," Wendy finally said, raising her hand a bit as she said it.
"Ah, Ms. Darling, thank you very much," M. Chandelle said. "Won't you come to the front to read?"
Wendy stood and walked to the front of the classroom, clutching her basic French paragraph in her hand.
"Bonjour Mesdames et Messieurs," Wendy read. "Je m'appelle Wendy Darling. J'ai seize ans. J'ai deux frères. Pendant mes moments de loisir, je sors avec mes amis. Pour me détendre, je lis des romans. Mon meilleur ami est Peter Pan. Il est près de seize ans."
Wendy looked to M. Chandelle.
"Very good, Wendy!" he said, clapping—a couple of other people joined in the clapping as if by impulse, slapping their hands together unenthusiastically a couple times. "Now—who is next?"
Wendy watched uninterestedly as the other students went to the front one-by-one and read their paragraphs, which were all almost exactly the same as hers, with a few details tweaked. She felt herself yawning several times, not paying much attention at all to whatever was being said. She started doodling on the paper that her paragraph was written on. She drew pirate ships and mermaids, and herself and Peter flying across the sky over mountains. The pictures were mainly of stick figure quality, but it was clear that Wendy had an imagination. It was a fact very few people knew about her. She often had colorful dreams about faraway, fantastical places. Places where she'd never have to grow up. The pressure that Wendy's parents put on her frightened her. She was afraid of going to college and then, god forbid, the real world, because she felt she could never live up to her parents' expectations. Yes, she was only a sophomore, but she knew the high school years could go by quickly—just look how quickly freshman year had gone by! Her scribbles, at this point, had turned into just that—scribbles. She was scrawling frantically at the top corner of the page. She finally realized what she was doing when she poked a hole in it.
"Is there anyone left who hasn't gone?" M. Chandelle asked.
"Me, sir," a quiet voice said.
Wendy looked. It was Tiger Lily. She walked timidly to the front of the class. She looked as she always did—completely lovely and adorable. Nothing surprised Wendy about the fact that Peter had gone for Tiger Lily, she was just disappointed. It wasn't that Wendy wasn't pretty—she was. But Peter tended to go for the kind of girls who were considered "cute," and Wendy just didn't really fall into that category. Wendy couldn't help but hope that Tiger Lily would somehow grow out of the rounded features and button nose, but she doubted it. She sure knew how to highlight it, too—her "signature" hairstyle seemed to be two loose, neat pigtails and a thin blue headband worn around her forehead. She had kind of a hippie style with a Native American flair, playing up her ancestry. Lots of fringe, feathers, and peace signs. Wendy always dressed conservatively (read: boring)—her mother wouldn't have it any other way.
"Bonjour," Tiger Lily said quietly. "Je m'appelle Tiger Lily. J'ai quatorze ans. Je suis un enfant unique. Mon petit ami est Peter Pan."
Wendy froze. Mon petit ami. Mon petit ami. She appeared to be flipping through her French book calmly, but inside, she felt frantic. Petit. Petit meant small. My small friend? No. Wendy knew that wasn't it. When "petit" was with "ami," it meant…
They're dating.
Wendy had found the page she was looking for. She knew she must look even paler than usual as she closed her French book calmly and looked to the front of the room. They were dating and Peter hadn't even had the decency to tell his best friend. Oh god, maybe he knew. Maybe he had somehow realized that Wendy was hopelessly in love with him. Was she that obvious? She was usually so good at concealing her emotions. Like right now. Her heart was pounding and her head was whirling, but on the outside she kept herself composed, aside from, perhaps, the ghastly pallor of her face. But that wasn't something most people would notice, she was sure.
"Okay, time to pair up," M. Chandelle said. "I know since most of you are freshman you don't know a lot of each other yet, so I've paired you up today to avoid last week's little fiasco. Let me see, where is my list…"
Wendy started worrying before he even began reading the list. True, she didn't know anyone in the room besides Tiger Lily—to whom she hadn't even been properly introduced—but she could always grab a random, scared freshman and pair up with her or him. With pre-made pairings, there was always the chance that she and Tiger Lily could be paired up. She felt herself crossing her fingers. Then she uncrossed them. That was silly. There were plenty of people in the class. The chance that the two of them would be paired up was nill to…
"Ms. Darling, you will be paired with Ms. Lily," M. Chandelle said.
Wendy swallowed and looked over at Tiger Lily. The girl gave her a bright, genuine smile and waved. She picked up her things and weaved through the students who were also trying to find their partners. She took the desk next to Wendy's and moved it closer so they could work together.
"Hi," Tiger said sweetly. "I'm Tiger Lily—you're Wendy, right?"
Wendy nodded, trying to be civil.
"Oh, I've heard so much about you!" Tiger Lily said, and Wendy was annoyed by the fact that the girl was giving her no real reason to dislike her. "Peter really adores you. I've been wanting to meet you for so long, but… I mean, I'm a bit shy so I didn't really know how to approach you."
"'So long'? What, like, a week?" Wendy said—it came out sounding much more rudely than she intended.
Tiger Lily looked taken aback, "Well, no, uh…"
"I mean, how long have you two been dating?" Wendy asked. "A couple days?"
"Well, we started dating over the summer," Tiger Lily said. "Um, it was a couple weeks after we met at the beach."
"Over… the summer?" Wendy said, then composed herself. "Oh. Right. I remember. I think he did say something about you."
Tiger Lily looked a little sad. But Wendy was lying. Peter hadn't mentioned a thing. Not a word. Not one hint that he was seeing someone. Why was he keeping it from his best friend?
"Oh, don't worry," Wendy said, suddenly feeling bad at seeing Tiger Lily's sad expression. "Peter is… well, he gets embarrassed about… romantic stuff. When he really likes a girl, he doesn't… say much."
Not true. Well. Peter didn't really have any romantic experience. At least, not that Wendy knew of. He had told her about girls he thought were cute, but, come to think of it, Wendy couldn't remember him ever mentioning being legitimately interested in dating any particular girl. Why was she comforting this girl? Why was she essentially aiding Tiger Lily and Peter's relationship? Well… She couldn't just break them up. As much as she would have liked for it to happen, it wasn't what a lady—a true lady—would do. And besides, if Peter was really invested in this relationship, then a break-up would make him sad. And Wendy didn't like seeing Peter sad. And if he wasn't invested in the relationship… well, then they would break up soon and Wendy would get her chance.
"That's sweet," Tiger Lily smiled. "Don't tell him, okay? But… I really like him. And I know you too are really, really close, so… I just wanted to get your approval. I would hate it if my boyfriend's best friend didn't want me to be with him."
"Of course you have my approval," Wendy said, half lying and half not—her emotions were all scrambled at this point. "I just want Peter to be happy, and you seem like a really nice girl. I'm sure you'll be good for each other."
"Oh, Wendy, thank you so much," Tiger Lily said, and leaned over to hug Wendy.
Wendy felt awkward as she limply hugged Tiger Lily back. She was actively sabotaging any chance she had of exposing her feelings to Peter this year. Maybe, subconsciously, she was doing it because she was afraid of the potential rejection and Tiger Lily was the perfect roadblock to sharing her affections. All that aside, the pair finally got to work on their worksheet. Tiger Lily seemed to have a knack for French, as Wendy did, and the two finished the worksheet a few minutes before the class ended.
"Well, I'm really glad I got to meet you," Tiger Lily said. "I'm sure we'll be seeing a lot of each other this year. Maybe if you start dating someone we can do some double dates?"
The idea of that made Wendy's heart and stomach flip, and not in a good way.
"Yeah, maybe," she said with a half-hearted smile. The bell rang. "Well. Nice to meet you. Bye!"
Wendy walked into the hallway. Once it was flooded with people and she was out of sight, she stormed quickly in the direction of her Spanish class. No longer needing to keep up the pleasant façade, she allowed her anger to show and to overtake all the other emotions.
"Peter Pan," she said loudly and seriously when she saw him, interrupting his friendly conversation with a cute Chinese girl. "We need to talk."
"Al… alright," Peter said, looking around.
"Now, please," Wendy said.
"Okay," Peter said as the Chinese girl wandered off and Wendy pulled him into a corner.
"Tiger Lily," Wendy said.
"What… about her?" Peter asked, looking slightly puzzled.
"She says you two are dating—since the summer," Wendy said. "Is this true?"
"Well… yeah," Peter said. "It's not a big deal."
"Not a big deal?" Wendy asked. "I'm your best friend—you didn't think it would be a good idea to tell your best friend that you were dating someone?"
"I didn't realize I needed to update you on all my dating activities," Peter said stubbornly, crossing his arms across his chest defiantly.
"You don't," Wendy admitted. "But I would just think that you would want to tell me about your first girlfriend—if she even is your first."
"She is," Peter said. "I just… Well, I didn't tell anyone, Wendy. I didn't really know how to… bring it up. Is there some reason why you think I shouldn't be dating her?"
"No," Wendy said, perhaps too quickly. "I mean… no. I just met her, and she seems like a really nice girl. Really sweet. Definitely… your type. I'm just a little disappointed that you told her about me but you didn't tell me about her."
"You didn't tell her I hadn't mentioned her to you, did you?" Peter asked, looking worried.
"Well—I did," Wendy said. "I was surprised, I just sort of… reacted. But don't worry. I covered for you. I told her that when you really like a girl, you don't talk about it. Which I guess is true, as it turned out, so…"
"Yeah," Peter said, looking at his hands and smiling. He looked smitten, like he was remembering something. Wendy felt like she might throw up.
"Um," Wendy said, looking down the hallway. "I'm going to run to the bathroom real quick. I'll see you in Spanish."
"Okay," Peter said, then put his arms out for a hug.
Wendy was afraid Peter would feel the pounding of her heart against his chest as they hugged, but if he did, he didn't say anything. Wendy pulled away from the hug and hurried to the bathroom. By the time she got there, she no longer felt nauseous. She walked to the mirror and composed herself. Her reddish-brown curly hair was pulled into its usual ponytail. She pulled out the elastic, letting the curls fall around her shoulders. It wasn't the conservative look that her mother approved every morning, but her mother didn't have to know. If Plan A for winning Peter's heart wasn't going to work out, Wendy decided she'd have to invent a Plan B. And she'd do it with subtlety and grace. She would let Peter decide.