A/N- I feel like I shouldn't be cranking out a new chapter after just like three or four days, but what the hey, here ya go! Super thanks to Ronnie. H for reviewing!

Chapter Five- Throwing A Fit, Making A Scene

"Am I teenager-y enough?" Kira asked, panicking as she saw the high school gates drawing closer. "I do not feel teenager-y enough! I look old! I can tell! They'll see that I'm twenty-five! Oh my God! We are D-O-N-E, fucked!"

"Kira, just calm the fuck down," Jenko said calmly. "We've done this shit once, we'll be just as fucking awesome this time."

"It's okay for you guys," Schmidt muttered, looking gloomily out the window. "You were popular and shit in high school."

"Schmidty, we were still best friends in high school despite your status as a dweeb," Kira reminded him. "Trust me, anyone tries that shit with you again and, in the words of our darling Jenko, I will seriously beat their dick off with both hands."

"Hey," Jenko practically sang. "We're here."

"Park in that handicapped spot!" Schmidt suggested as they drove into the student parking lot. "It'll make us look cool."

"That's awesome!" Jenko enthused.

"No, it'll make us look like jackasses," Kira said, but like with 75% of the words that came out of her mouth, the boys ignored her and parked up. They exited the car, with Jenko pulling his seat forward to let Kira squeeze out through the cap, and stood without trying to draw too much attention to themselves.

That was, until Schmidt started freaking out because everyone around them was two-strapping their backpacks, whilst the three of them were one-strapping on Jenko's instruction.

"Dudes? Everyone's two-strapping it!" he exclaimed worriedly.

"Just stay with the one-strap!" Jenko muttered.

"I can't! I can't!" Schmidt replied, hurriedly pulling the other strap over his shoulder. "I can't right now!"

"Schmidt!" Kira hissed. "Stop! You freaking out is making us even more noticeable!"

"Don't succumb to the peer pressure!" Jenko said incredulously. "What are you doing?!"

"You're supposed to use two straps! One strap is peer pressure!" retorted Schmidt.

"We're not telling you to take drugs!" exploded Kira. "Take the fucking strap down! Now!"

"No!" Schmidt clamped the strap to his shoulder with his hand.

"No! No, you're fucking up right now!" Jenko whispered irately, looking around at all the different students. "Okay, those are Goths. Those are nerds."

Kira did the same. "Those are cheerleaders."

Jenko caught sight of a group of students in 1950s-style clothing. "I don't know what they are."

"Rockabilly," Kira mumbled to him, but all she got was a blank stare.

"What the fuck are those things?!" Schmidt exclaimed, puzzled, staring at some girls dressed in colourful Japanese-type clothes.

"I…have no idea," admitted Kira.

"I am so confused right now," said Jenko. What he failed to notice, that Kira did, was Schmidt staring at a blonde girl who had just pulled up on her bike. She was very pretty in a non-conventional, artsy way, but Kira was way, way more interested in the guy that the girl had come to a stop in front of.

He was gorgeous; athletic build, wavy brown hair, model-esque facial features, chiselled jaw line, grey shirt that fit him perfectly. In short, he was Kira's ideal guy, appearance-wise. Fuck, it was like someone had built him in a lab for her.

"Woah," she and Schmidt breathed out in unison, but they both lost the dreamy looks on their faces when they saw the girl and the boy kiss; they were together.

"Hey, yo," the boy suddenly called, walking up to Jenko, Schmidt and Kira, causing them to stop. "Hey. Is that your car?" He jerked his head in the direction of the vehicle Hoffs at the station had loaned them.

"Yeah," Jenko said proudly; he loved his cars.

"What's that thing get, ten miles to the gallon?" the boy asked.

"No, try like, seven," Jenko replied casually. "What about you?" he asked a different boy who was standing by his own car.

"Biodiesel, dawg," the other boy answered.

"Oh God, it's the hippy squad," Kira muttered in Schmidt's ear, and he had to turn his laugh into a hacking cough.

"Smells like egg rolls," he managed to cough out.

"Yeah it does," the hot guy said smugly. "Runs on leftover fry oil from Hunan Palace. But we try to ride bikes when we can, global crisis and whatnot."

"Are you serious?" snorted Kira, unable to control herself.

"Whatever man," Jenko said offhandedly. "I don't care about anything."

"You don't care about the environment?" the boy demanded, looking between Jenko and Kira. "That's kinda fucked up, man."

"Caring about and being interested in are two very, very different things," Kira replied, and the boy scowled at her. She grinned cockily back and blew a kiss at him.

"Hey, hey," another boy piped up from his position leaning on the car roof. "Will y'all shut the hell up? Trying to study."

"Look at him!" laughed Jenko, pointing. "He's trying. He's actually trying! What a nerd!" The boy put his book down and moved in front of Jenko, who was taunting, "Look at him. Look at the nerd!"

"Who you calling a nerd, man?" the boy challenged.

"Oh I'm sorry, what?" Jenko asked ignorantly, before he punched the boy clean in the face, flooring him.

"Jenk-" Kira had to cut herself off before she blew their cover. "What the fuck man?!"

"Shit, dude!" exclaimed Schmidt.

"Hey, what the hell, are you serious?!" the hot boy cried, helping his friend.

"Turn that gay-ass music off," Jenko said condescendingly, looking at their car.

"You punched me because I'm gay?!" the punched boy demanded.

"What?!" Jenko clearly had not been expecting that. None of them had.

"You've gotta be fucking kidding me," Kira sighed, putting her head in her hands.

"No, I- oh come on!" he said to the crowd that had gathered around them.

"That's not cool, man," Schmidt said quietly.

"That is really insensitive," added the hot boy.

"I didn't punch him because he's gay!" insisted Jenko. "I punched him, and then he happened to turn out to be gay afterwards!"

"I was gay when you punched me!" the other boy spat.

"In a weird way," said Schmidt in an attempt at peacemaking. "It might have been homophobic not to punch you just because you were gay."

The three of them still ended up in the principal's office, a whole fifteen minutes into the school day.

"You punched a little gay black kid in the face, and it's not even second period. How do you explain that?" the principal questioned them.

"Mr Dadier, I'm so sorry about that," apologised Jenko. "I just-"

"Look guys, I'm going to relate to you, okay?" Mr Dadier said. "A kid died the other day, and nobody, including me, is doing anything about it. That's weird, guys. And then you three show up, with thirty days left, causing trouble in my school. I am one more gay black kid getting punched in the face away from a nervous breakdown! Do I make myself clear? You three cross my line again, and you walk into this office, I'm gonna expel you. You got me?" All three of them nodded quickly.

"Mr Dadier, really, we are honestly sorry," Kira said sincerely, flashing her best 'you can trust me' smile. It half-worked, because Dadier half-smiled back.

"Alright, let's do this," he said, pulling three files out of his desk. "You must be Daisy." Kira nodded; Daisy McQuaid was her alter-ego for the assignment. "Here. Yeah, you strike me as the Home Ec, cheerleader type." She took her file silently.

"Which one of you is Doug?" Dadier asked the guys. Neither of them moved. "Let's do that again, and pretend you guys aren't weird. Which one of you is named Doug?" Both Kira and Schmidt looked at Jenko.

"No, dudes, I'm Brad," he muttered back, but Dadier heard him.

"Okay good," he said. "That means your name is Doug, son," he said to Schmidt, handing him a file. "So you're the twins?" he directed at Schmidt and Kira.

"Yeah, I'm Doug," Schmidt sighed.

"I'm sorry about my brothers," Kira quickly apologised. "Both of them had lead paint on their crib bars, and well, teething and all that."

-21 Jump Street, 2012

I had no idea why I was even attempting to try to sleep. I was so scared and restless that all I could do was lie there on James' sofa, swaddled up in my blanket with my head resting on my folded-up leather jacket. I tossed and turned and sighed, but sleep was just evading me.

Of course, it didn't help that outside all I could hear was explosions and gunfire and screaming. I was shaking so much, despite the heat the blanket was providing for me. I just felt sick.

"Jay?" I whispered. "Jay, are you awake?"

There was silence for a few moments; moments in which I was sure Jay had actually managed to fall asleep, so I was getting ready to roll over and try once again to snooze when he spoke. "Yeah Mackenzie, I'm awake." He was brusque, just like he had been for the last two hours, since we'd finished cataloguing all the food. He was pissed with Seth and me for not backing him up, I could tell.

"You don't have to be so blunt with me, you know," I said, rubbing my eyes and yawning.

"I'm not being blunt."

"Yes, you are. You called me Mackenzie. You only ever call me Mackenzie if you're pissed off, upset or we haven't seen each other for a while, like at the airport. So what's up?"

"Oh, you know, it's the end of the world and here I am, trapped in James Franco's house with a bunch of people who really mean nothing to me." Jay sounded so cold.

Wow. Now that stung. "Thanks for that," I muttered, pulling the blanket up closer around my neck as I had suddenly gotten very cold.

"Kenz, don't be stupid," he said quickly, and the warmth had returned to his voice. "You know I don't mean you. I just mean that-" Jay's words were effectively cut off by more explosions outside. I could hear him shifting around uncomfortably as the first, then the second went boom. I clutched my blanket tighter, my knuckles feeling like they were about to break.

That was when we heard the footsteps coming slowly towards us. They were slow, plodding, like a bear, and for a second I thought one had broken into the house, especially when I saw a big black shadow moving towards us. Jay raised himself up on his forearms whilst I curled up in the foetal position, whimpering, only to see Seth walk into the light, wrapped in a blanket.

"Hey," he said indifferently.

"Hey," replied Jay, and I could tell from his voice he was frowning.

"'Sup," I said, drawing the 'u' sound out.

"I'm gonna sleep with you guys," Seth announced.

"What?" said Jay.

"I'm gonna sleep with you," Seth repeated, and he settled himself in next to Jay in the open spot between the sofas on the floor. "It's too scary to sleep alone."

"But this is my little area," Jay protested.

"Well, I'm invading your little area. Besides, Mack's here too," Seth pointed out, and I waggled my fingers in a wave.

"She's in her couch area," Jay whined. "This is my spot."

"Okay, Sheldon Cooper," I teased. "Chill out. Three's company, I say."

"Are you mad at us, man?" Seth suddenly asked him. Good, so it wasn't just me picking up on Jay's irritated vibes then.

"If I was pissed at you guys, I'm sure it would have something to do with the fact that I had no interest in coming to this house socially, and now I am barricaded in here with a bunch of people that I really hate," Jay replied petulantly, which was pretty much what he'd told me too.

"Maybe this was meant to be," said Seth. "Maybe this horrible, horrible, deadly earthquake happened so we could become closer as a group of friends."

"This is nature's way of telling you to get that stick out of your ass and accept everyone," I added.

"I don't need a group," Jay insisted. "I'm like DMX, man. I'm a lone wolf."

"One man wolf pack," I snorted, quoting The Hangover.

"DMX isn't a lone wolf," Seth told him. "DMX has the Ruff Ryder crew. You can't stop, drop and open up shop alone! You need people to help you in an earthquake disastery situation."

"It was something else!" Oh God, not this again. "It was Judgement Day."

"I had no idea you were a Bible kinda guy, Jay," I said thoughtfully.

"Like Terminator 2?" asked Seth.

"No, not like Terminator 2!" sighed Jay, facepalming. "For God's sakes."

"Like Skynet? You think this is Skynet? Like Skynet went live?"

"No! Will you please stop saying 'Skynet'?"

"Well you're the one that said Judgement Day!"

"The biblical Judgement Day!" Jay explained, and Seth scoffed. "What?"

"That's just crazy!" Seth said superficially.

"You fucking heathen." Okay, apparently he'd offended Jay even more.

"Okay, here's the thing," said Seth. "Let's sat for a second there was blue light sucking people up into the sky. That means that we were not awesome enough to go to Heaven."

"You're basically saying God hates us," I chipped in. A sudden set banging footsteps accompanied by a large shadow coming down the stairs caused all of us to jump wildly, making me to scramble into a sitting position in my panic while Seth and Jay cuddled up to each other in panic.

"Craig?!" I spat as the one and only Mr Robinson stepped into the light. "Goddamn you, man!"

"What y'all doing?" he whispered.

"Fuck you, Craig!" Seth hissed as he and Jay released each other.

"I'm scared. It's scary by myself," Craig mumbled.

"Come join the love-in, then," I invited, opening my arms in a greeting gesture.

"Yeah, it's way better with more people," added Seth.

"I'mma come down here," Craig said, and he scooched himself down on the other length of the sofa so his head was positioned next to my head.

"So you're gonna-" began Jay.

"Right here," Craig finished for him, snuggling up with his personalised towel.

"I feel better, actually," said Seth. "I like that. It's better with more people."

"Hey guys." Jonah's voice suddenly floated out of the darkness behind us. The boys all started for a third time, and this time I let out an actual shriek of fear.

"Jesus Christ!" said Jay, at the same time Seth yelped, "Jesus!"

"For fuck sake, Jonah!" I grumbled, scowling at him.

"Sorry," he apologised. "Franco has this crazy open floor plan. I can hear every word you guys are saying. I might as well hang with you guys if that's cool." He proceeded to awkwardly step over me on his way to squish in between Seth and Jay on the floor.

"It's cool if we can all now focus on going the fuck to sleep," I suggested irately.

"It feels so much more safe now, guys," Seth said contently.

"It's nice here," agreed Jonah as he shuffled around, trying to get comfortable. "Should we spoon it?" he suggested to Seth.

"Yeah, you want to?" answered Seth, so he, Jonah and Jay spent the next minute or so arguing about if they should go dick-to-butt, tip-to-tip or just plain dicks-up, with Jonah eventually deciding they'd go 'Scarface-style' with him placing his arms around Jay and Seth.

"Goodnight boys," he said, kissing Jay and Seth on the forehead. I cleared my throat significantly. "And Kenzie."

"Sweet dreams, fellas," Craig said, closing his eyes.

"Nighty night, fuckers," I yawned, and a few minutes later I was totally out cold.

The red of the inside of my eyelids tricked me into thinking the sun was up the next morning. When my eyes fluttered open, though, I saw it was mostly just the fires outside the boards. I was lying on my side, facing the wall by the stairs. I lie there for a moment, seeing the odd positions the boys and I had shuffled into overnight.

Craig had his hand planted on Jay's face, Seth, Jay and Jonah were all cuddled up together and my hand was curled in a fist over Seth's eye. Jesus, had I punched him?! I was all set to go back to sleep when I realised something. I could smell…was that…bacon?

I sat up, rubbing at my heavy eyes when I heard clattering steps coming slowly down the stairs. It was James, dressed in a white vest, shorts and flip-flops, brushing his teeth. He looked totally stunned at something.

"Mornin' James," I yawned, stretching my arms above my head. Then I heard movement behind me.

"Franco! Bolton!" The voice of Danny McBride filtered into my still somewhat hazy subconscious, and I turned my head so suddenly I felt my neck crack. "Good morning, sunshines!" Danny was sitting at James' table, surrounded by loads of the food we'd scavenged last night!

"Danny, no!" I howled, jumping up and leaping over the back of the sofa.

"Guys, guys, wake up! Danny's alive!" James yelled at the others, causing them to awaken. "He's eating all the fucking food!"

James and I ran over to the table with the guys stumbling after us, every single one of us screaming at Danny to stop eating…except for Jonah, who excitedly said, "Danny!"

"No, it's cool man," Danny said good-naturedly. "I fucking made this for you guys!"

"Stop eating!" shouted Seth.

"Don't eat another piece of bacon!" begged Jay.

"Guys, just chill the fuck out, okay?" Wow, Danny really had to be the most ignorant person in the entire world. "I'm sure the Green Goblin can fucking afford some more bacon."

I couldn't help it; I snorted out a laugh in the most unattractive way ever. We all gave James shit for being in the original Spider-Man trilogy. It wasn't that he'd been bad in them, it was just…well, the third one…need I say more?

"Dude, that shit's supposed to last us till we get rescued!" shouted Craig.

"Wait a second," said Danny, still fucking eating. "I know what happened. You guys dropped acid, didn't you?" He looked around at the six of us. "Mhm. Craig doesn't have any pants on, he got fucking wild. Probably danced, sweated all over the place. You've got white shit all over your mouth, Franco, you probably sucked someone's dick. Jonah over here probably watched and jerked off. Kenzie's half-naked so she probably decided to treat you all to an encore to her famous striptease whilst she painted herself in Nutella. Jay, I didn't even know you were in town. Good to see you."

"Danny! We're not on acid! We didn't suck each other's dicks!" Seth said, annoyed.

"James Franco didn't suck any dick last night?" Danny mocked. "Now I know y'all are trippin'."

"Do you actually not know what happened last night?!" Seth asked incredulously.

"Daniel, you may want to stay seated for a second," Jonah said gravely. "Some really messed up stuff happened, and there were a lot of fatalities."

"Oh really?" Danny sneered. "You're putting your 'serious' voice on, Jonah? Okay, tell me about these 'fatalities'."

"Dude, Segel's dead, Krumholtz is dead, Michael Cera's dead," Craig told him.

"So Michael Cera's dead, that's not a total loss, huh?" Danny began laughing. "Michael Cera's dead!"

"Fucking hell, Danny!" I yelled. "This ain't funny! Like, at all, you shit-turtle!" The other guys all made varying statements of agreement.

"Seth, that's a better performance than performance than you've given in your last six movies," said Danny. "Where the fuck was that in Green Hornet, huh? Kenzie, you're letting some of that shitty New York accent slip out of your sexy little mouth, best keep that under wraps if you wanna keep convincing people you're a pure LA bitch. Jonah, you're fucking sucking balls. You're an Academy Award nominated person. You need to be fucking selling that shit, dude. Fatalities," he stressed in imitation. "There were some fatalities."

"Fatalities," Jonah repeated.

"Okay, now that was good," Danny approved. "That was good."

"Does it seem like we're fucking joking?!" burst out Seth. Danny just looked bored and stuffed another bit of bacon in his mouth.

"Hey, hey, hey! What the fuck you eating, man?!" we all shouted.

"Spit it out your mouth!" ordered Craig, grabbing Danny's cheeks. "Give me the bacon!" Danny obnoxiously did just that, spraying a shower of mushed-up meat all over the table. And us.

"Danny, I swear to fucking Korean Jesus, if you put another bit of bacon in your mouth, I will rip your fucking tongue out with my bare hands," I savagely warned him.

"Stop all that dirty talk, Kenz," he taunted. "We're in public."

I was about to launch into a furious outburst when a loud bang caused all of us to swing round and divert our attention to the front door. The banging continued, steadily getting more and more frantic, and I didn't fail to notice James pushing me more behind him as he pointed his gun at the door. He really was my big brother.

"Shit, what do we do?!" hissed Seth.

"Shoot 'em, shoot 'em, shoot 'em!" squawked Craig.

The banging kept going, which turned into tearing as something began ripping down the boards.

"Franco, shoot!" I squeaked. "Shoot it! SHOOT IT!"

"Shoot the door, Franco!" exclaimed Seth, just as a middle-aged, balding man stuck his head through the gap in the boards.

"Oh God!" the man gasped. "Did you not hear me knocking out here?! I've been knocking forever! Please! Please, you gotta let me in!"

"Hang on a second," James said cautiously, turning to the rest of us. "Guys. I know it sounds really weird, but I don't think we should let him in."

"Why not!?" asked Jay, sounding appalled.

"Yeah, why not?!" demanded the man. "I can hear you, by the way."

"I'm sorry, we just don't know you, man," James told him. "You could be like, a looter or a rapist or a titty-fucker. Like, I'm sorry." I saw Seth grab at his man-boobs when James said about titty-fucking. "Look, guys, we just boarded up this whole house to keep everyone out," James continued. "And the first guy comes to the door, we're gonna let him in? I mean, how do we know we can trust this guy?"

"He has a point, dudes," I admitted, frowning.

"I want to live!" the man shouted. "Things have gone crazy out here!"

"Things are fucking crazy out here!" imitated Danny. "This guy fucking sucks!"

"What if he's a rapist?!" said James

"Man, even if he is a rapist, he can't rape all of us," Jonah said. "If anyone, he'll go for Kenzie. She's got the only vagina."

"Thank you for that, Jonah," I said, rolling my eyes.

"I'm not -I'm not a rapist!" the man insisted.

"You want to titty-fuck us!?" demanded Seth, still clutching his chest.

"If you want me to titty-fuck you, I will! So good, you'll love it!" the man yelled hysterically.

"Seth, back me up, please!" pleaded Jay. "We can't just leave him out there to die, are you crazy!?"

"What do you want to do?" James asked Seth. "I'll do whatever you want to do!"

"Let's vote on it!" Seth suggested in a panic.

"I fucking vote you let me in!" the man shrieked.

"Here's my vote," announced Danny, raising his hand. "Fuck all of you, I'm letting him in. This is boring."

But just as Danny stood up, the man screamed, "THERE'S SOMETHING OUT HERE!" A deafening roar emanated from outside, and something sliced clean through the man's neck, decapitating him.

Blood sprayed everywhere, and the man's head came rolling towards us, settling at Danny's feet as we all screamed.

"This is real!" screeched Danny. "This is fucking real!" And with that, he raised his foot and booted the head in James' direction, who jerked it away with his gun towards Craig, and this started off a game of soccer with the head, because no one wanted it anywhere near them, least of all me.

James slipped over in the blood that was all over the floor, and he crashed into my legs, sending me toppling down with him. I landed with my eyes exactly in line with the eyes of the head. I let out a shriek and punched it away, and it landed at Jonah's feet.

"You guys!" he exclaimed. "This man was alive a few seconds ago, we can't play soccer with his head!" He bent down and picked the head up as James and I climbed unsteadily to our feet, our arms around each other. Oh look at that, I was crying again.

As Jonah straightened up with the head, a load of blood and head fluid splattered out of the neck, and Jonah hastily dropped it with an, "Eurgh!"

"What the fuck is going on!?" shouted Danny.

"It blinked at me!" wailed Jonah. "It- it blinked at my face!" Finally, Craig saw sense and chucked a blanket over the head, and Seth used a tripod of some sorts to shift it out of the way.

"There's blood all over my floor!" whined James.

"Really Franco?" I snapped. "Like really? We just watched a man have his head sliced clean off his body, and you're bitching about the fucking state of the floor? Get your priorities straight, man!" I was seriously on the verge of losing my shit. It hadn't even been twenty-four hours and I was already totally losing my mind. Just how long would it take for me to go completely nuts?

"Someone should look out the hole!" advised Seth.

"I ain't looking out that hole!" exclaimed Craig. "Last person who looked through that hole got his head chopped off!"

"Wait, wait, wait, wait!" gasped Jay, who was still out of breath from Head Soccer. "What is out there might still be out there!" Everyone started going 'shh!'

"Okay, I know, I know," whispered James, beginning to move towards the stairs. He gestured at us to follow him. He led us up to a lookout room at the very top of the house. He tore the boards away from the window and we all looked outside.

There was nothing there. No wild animal, no human. No signs of life at all. All that was out there was thick, opaque smoke, fire, burning cars and buildings, sparks and that gigantic hole that had swallowed all our friends.

"Oh. Holy. Shit," I muttered.

A/N- So Danny has arrived. That means shit is just gonna start going downhill from here, doesn't it? Well, I hope you liked the chapter! Come on though, I'd really like to get some more reviews and follows and stuff! Y'all know what to do! Xx Gee xX

PS- Check out my Polyvore! Link's on my profile!

References:
"We are D-O-N-E, fucked!" is from GTA V. Good o' Dave Norton.